They have

They have
>Three armed and dangerous men
>A ship
>A chest full of treasure

You have
>A bloodied sword
>A knife strapped to your calf
>Fashionable heels

What do you do?

Negotiate

Get my fashionable heels sunk into the sand, twist my ankle and promptly get shot in the face for my choice of accoutrements.

One of them has a gun, so it's all over for me.

I remember that accuracy sucked dick on those early pistols and dive to the side because I'm not retarded

Seduce them.

Kill them and use the treasure to buy even fancier heels.

There is no way in hell you can evade the shot and outskill 3 men with a sword with heels in the sand.
Negotiate or just drop on your knees and suck them, everyone knows that's what adventures on high wheels want to.

What they don't know is that the only reason the heels aren't sinking into the sand is that they are facing an illusion.

The other illusion is that their ship isn't on fire.

You could still hit something plenty fine with that sort of pistol at the range depicted, you scrotum sniffer. If a pistol couldn't hit somebody a mere fifteen, maybe twenty paces away, nobody would have ever used them.

But yeah go ahead and dive to the side, so he can just wait for you to hit the dirt and become an easier target since you've lost all your mobility from belly flopping onto the dirt.

Ask where Benedict Cumberbatch's eyes went.

>what are moving targets
Those pistols were basically used as close range weapons with gunpowders
>But yeah go ahead and dive to the side, so he can just wait for you to hit the dirt and become an easier target since you've lost all your mobility from belly flopping onto the dirt.
>revealing how much of a fat neckbeard you are
If you're too dumb to roll afterwards you don't deserve to live.

You're missing something here.

>Standing on sand
>But the heels haven't sunk

Clearly, this lady is a witch of some sort.

Trade heels for a treasure

Turn my sword to flash the bright sunlight into the eyes of the guy with the gun before quickly dashing to the right, hoping he doesn't hit me.
Hide behind what I presume to be a wrecked rowboat to the right.
Use my jacket and sword to make a fake silhouette and move it to the left, hoping the leftmost guy with the gun also takes a shot.
Throw my dagger at middle guy and then dash to take care of lefty while out of the corner of my eye glancing at righty.
If righty attacks me, kick him in the crotch with my heels.
Then go cut up lefty and take care of all of them.

That's the plan anyway. It's not likely to work out, but I mean, if I'm fucked anyway why not try it?

join their crew, offer sex if necessary

You might want to stop reading so many comic books, user.

Bluff.

fuck off tranny

>lady

teleport in the ship
point cannon at beach
'you know, this time is personnel, kids'
fire at them

>Three armed and dangerous men

How many men are there and does their third arm come out of their chest or do they have an extra on one side?

Rolled 20 (1d20)

I throw my sword at the dude with the gun.

Your aim is true and the sword is on its way to deliver death via cranial piercing. However, the muzzle of man's gun flashes while the sword is midair and the bullet ricochets off the blade, whizzing past your face close enough to have shaved a few hairs. The sword's trajectory is changed to the man's throat where it promptly buries itself. He gurgles and falls backwards onto the sand, still holding onto the pistol.
The bald man to your left is momentarily blinded by drops of blood that flew off the blade. While rubbing his eyes with one hand, he crouches and vaguely shoots in your direction with the gun held in the other. The barrel between you and him explodes violently, evidently having contained some volatile substances that hadn't yet leaked out from the break. It sends up a cloud of sand and smoke, leaving you unable to see the condition of the bald man.
Meanwhile Bendadick Cabbagepatch seems to have gone into shock as he cowers on the spot, face turned away from the explosion, cutlass held loosely.

What do you do?

Three men can't sail that ship. I'm sure an arrangement is possible.

Rolled 7 (1d20)

I throw my knife at Benny. Sorry Benny.

Imagine General Grievous, but one arm less.

Would four be enough to handle a ship of that size though?

Rolled 14 (1d20)

Can I teleport behind them?

This. They'll be lucky to get home at all crewing a ship with just three men.

>Those pistols were basically used as close range weapons with gunpowders
Not that user, but he is right, the distance they are at is considered close, if the gun couldn't hit her from that distance then no one would use them

Obviously I am a autistic minmaxer, so I simply move up, ignore damage from bullet and kill the three men in one turn.

Don't know why nature would develop something so hideously unsymmetrical. I take them out of their misery.

But the sword is bloody mane, it's not reflective, it diffuses light =)
Can't do that

Well, obviously he is a pirate and they got missing limbs all the time.

Right, you roll, then you need to stand up afterwards, making a nice slowly moving target. Later period pistols like that would certainly be effective, especially at "minute of man" out to anywhere between 10-20 meters, sometimes more if it's a very well made or longer gun. Well within the depicted distance of these combatants.

Not all of it mane.

Its already rigged, and is pretty small for a ship in the age of sail. Shouldn't be too hard, as long as no bad weather comes. You won't get much speed, and would only be able to realistically use one sail, but it would be fine.

"Negotiate" and pray that the other two players who are hiding in the bushes hurry up and take the damn shot.

Cast cloudkill.

Do you see a motherfucking hyphen in that sentence, grammar grunt?

lady (gentleman)

Just use Deflect Missile to catch the bullet, then kill 'em.