Running weekly game

>Running weekly game
>Characters emerge from windy plains, move through a tunnel to the other side of a mountain range
>Desert now, time for desert adventures
>One player reveals his "Akshually" card
>Takes up twenty minutes showing me proof that real world biomes don't work like that
>I tell him to just accept it and keep playing
>He hasn't shut the fuck up about my improvised geography since

Look him dead in the eye and say "it's magic I ain't gotta explain shit"

I see you got trapped with an autist in your player group. You have to weed them out early user. The easiest way is the potato test. Mention potatos somewhere in the first game session, like have a tavern serving them, and if no one spergs out, you're good. Autists are only going to cause you misery the longer you allow them in your group.

I hope you took a dump on his chest.

I'm retarded. Can you explain this to me?

They already know who the autist is. The entire exercise is pointless unless you want to find another one which is unlikely, we don't travel in packs. Too much eye contact and need for small talk.

If he keeps going, start taking away his class abilities because they wouldn't work in real life.

There were no potatoes in ye olden times

Potatoes weren't eaten by anyone but protospics until Sir Francis Drake (peace be unto him) brought them back from unga bunga land sometime in the late 1500s. Well after the days of hitting people with swords, and into the days of dakka.

That's pretty amazing, thanks Anons.

He's right though OP, that's fucking retarded. It fucks up the suspension of disbelief vital to crafting a living, breathing world.

That guy should start a vote of No Confidence at the table and get you replaced with somebody who doesn't have such a Reddit May Care attitude about his fucking hobby and wasting people's fucking time

Another prime example of a Chad Hobbyist vs Virgin Gamer

Tell the sperg to look up rain shadow deserts. The Gobi in Asia is a prime example.

this is just an advanced attempt at sperg detection

Did you just want an excuse to post this image? It's fine if you did, just curious

See, my vision of what the virgin/chad images is that the virgin is supposed to be intentionally recognizable by anyone, to make losers think they're genetically predisposed towards failure and that the Chad is supposed to be the comical opposite on every point. Hence the long steps/beetle-like strides thing

Potatoes aren't native to Europe. They're fairly nutritious, and ridiculously easy to grow. When Europeans finally came around to growing and eating them (they thought they were dirty and only fit for animals for a while), it caused a population boom and allowed the Industrial Revolution to take place.

The general argument is that a faux-medieval, feudal fantasy world should start industrializing and moving away from the feudal system if it has widespread access to the GOAT tuber.

I should add that historians don't necessarily all agree on how important a factor the potato was. It's an ongoing discussion, insofar as serious historians can be bothered to get this serious about potatoes.

If potatoes are a huge realism deal breaker, then logically speaking, a million other details should be, too. This is why suspension of disbelief is a thing.

Potatoes just happen to have become a meme among fantasy turbospergs. They wouldn't be able to produce a perfectly realistic setting either, it just gives them a smug sense of superiority to be able to spout the potato meme at people who just want to play a goddamn game.

What is the spergs issue again?

Also orange carrots

I thought deserts WERE on the other side of mountains because the mountains blocked the rain, though?

Anyway, just say "your right, but a wizard did it" and then explain how it's fallout from an ancient magical war

Yeah but then it should not be plains on the other side. But yes in a fantasy world there is no need for anything to work like it does in reality

But that's literally how real world biomes work.
I've been through Cunningham's Gap in Australia and it's pretty striking the difference on each side of the great dividing range.
East of the range you've got rolling plains in most all directions besides the one occupied by a mountain range. Cunningham's Gap itself is filled with lush forest, green as all fuck. And west of the range there's a great contrast, as everything suddenly dries out and becomes incredibly arid.

Desert is created from a long ago magic war that tainted the land and removed all who lived upon it. It is cursed and foul and only the most desperate would live there.

>If he keeps going, start taking away his class abilities because they wouldn't work in real life.
Made me laugh

>Plains are high in altitude
>Or particularly cold
>Or arid
>Or of low soil quality
>Or has an aggressive grass that out competes larger foiliage.

>Rain shadow desert on the other side of mountain.

Your autust isn't even autistic-ing correctly. WHICH SETS OFF MY AUTISM REEEEEEEEE!

To be fair, if he was say, co.plaining that the prevailing winds were going backwards for the effect, he'd be in the right. Nothing worse than pretending it works like reality and them getting basic shit wrong

It's seriously doubtful that he knew what the prevailing winds were.
Even if OP described "as you emerge from the cave you feel desert breeze hit you in the face" or something to that effect, that's just localised wind patterns, which have little bearing on the overall prevailing winds.
In addition, OP explicitly described the plains as "windy" and if that isn't pretty much 100% proof that the prevailing winds start from the plains and hit the mountain, fuck if I know what is.

Clearly what OP needs is a higher-level autist to drive off the lowl-level autist.