Has one of your PCs ever been friendzoned?

She's literally a whore. Just have him catch her cheating on him. If he wants to derail your campaign, bust his balls.

Let him do it if it helps the narrative.

If however he start getting creepy, say "you pick her up and do your thing, next day you wake up and what you want to do now?"

Literally fade to black.

Does your DM want to smash? If she's decent you should

Wow I love this thread that obviously isn't bait for a /r9k/ tier roastie reee thread

So... where's the friendzone?

Let him marry her, have her steal all his gold and run off with a nobleman while he's away murderhoboing

That's an elf.

Between me and my female DM.
It's like, abundantly clear that she does not want to smash, but i'm the perpetual subject of her NPC's romantic liaisons... Probably because i'm the fat / sad / hopelessly single one in the group.

You are being paranoid and silly
Sto that

Ahhhh.

Oh.

How is it abundantly clear that she's not gunning for your depressed dick?

No I just know what's up

It's like all the "haha give me a game with no niggers" or whatever threads on /v/

I come here to escape that shit

Nah, pretty sure you're just paranoid and jaded.
You should step out of Veeky Forums for a while, take out your dog for a walk or something

As a DM I let my players have sex with NPCs, fade to black and all that. It makes it more fun when the death traps begin to happen, and now there are succubi in the dungeon Muhahaha. The overconfident fools won't know what hit them!

So to answer your question, no friend zoning just yet they will have to survive before that even becomes a option.

I don't play with you, but I must say it would be unbelievable shitty if every single wench was actually a succubus or a vampire in disguise.

not every single wench. like I said in the dungeon, in the taverns there safe for the moment. and they won't be expecting the poor girl in the dungeon that they just rescued who has the hots for them to actually be a succubus, because the tavern wenches have given them overconfidence they think there super suds or something. you give them the normal pussy first then let the awful happen latter during the adventure.

this of course will only work a few times but it will make them more careful with who they sleep with, especially loose women. you know they might have to take a actual romantic interest in the person they want to bang, just to be on the safe side. because the alternative is to have a chance (even if's small) that their soul might be sucked out their urethra.

Yea, then I gave her a good raping and a Glasgow smile. Learnt her good. Ain't a cuck.

Seems so harsh, plus he knows she's a whore already
Don't worry he's a really good roleplayer and knows where to draw the line.
Thing is i'd already had her established as having a genuine interest in him and ironically enough he is already rich but forsook his family's inheritence.

woah I'm super impressed at how controversial and not at all boring your edginess is

fucking yawn, try harder

Fag I'll fuck your ass dry.

Wew lad now you're calling me...gay? Fuck I've never been owned like this before

You're fucking blase. You're like every neckbeard 16 year old redditor that thinks skullfucking a toddler is the epitome of badass

If you're going to be an edge fag, at least give me something new you bland, obnoxious twat

He's just enticed by your meaty ass but doesn't know how to convey it

Could you not? I get you're having a bad day but don't take it out on the thread

What do you call men like that? Beta orbiters?

N W F
W
F

I had a PC who did this to a female orc who was obviously head over heels for him
This went on for awhile until she finally had enough and straight told him she loved him
They're good fuck-buddies now

my character has almost the highest fellowship you can possibly get, naturally she is super attractive. I constantly belittle guys and trick them into doing things I want, the gm mostly just sends me fat hobbos or whatever and tries to get them to get with me but I turn them down and and if they keep on pressing the party kills them.

Anyways, there was this one muscle girl I really liked actually and I tried to open up to her and she took me for a quick slag and then Never talked to me again. Go figure lol.

Only the difference is 1 of the WHORES NED! is actually interested in the fighter, the chick the bard crushed on doesnt give a fuck

Tell that to her.

Son, ask me how I know you never jailed. Fucking a niggah ass in lockup ain't gay you fag. None the less I'd do you dry.

Stop projecting.

I remember a buddy of mine tried to do that with an NPC. Next campaign DM said the PC and NPC got together anyway and had kids.

So you play boring barely a character characters that nobody will ever remember or care about, huh

>The DM Fedora

>YAWN, you're so BOORING, you should get better. I am SO above you all
I was with you up until you posted this nonsense. You turned out to be just as much of a 16 year-old as he was.

The best way to annoy an edgelord is to demand more of them

>literal gay sex isn't gay

I get that this is Veeky Forums and we're supposed to be eternally aloof and ironic ever since this site really went to shit around 2010, but on the off chance you actually think that, you're a fucking homo.

If sex is mentioned in your games then you are by default a shitty gaming group for weirdo virgins

My group focuses on themes much deeper than wannabe frat boy shit like "DUDE I LIKE ROLLED A 20 to LIKE CUM IN HER LIKE LMAO BRO HIGH FIVE ME DUDE"

My orc friendzoned this slutty bitch and her daughter in an otherwise normal game DMed my friend's mother whom I've been gaming with for over ten years. It was so out of the blue that these sluts wanted to be impaled on my orcish spear that I had no choice but to deny them.

I'm surprised this wasn't posted yet.

The thing about aloof irony is its the only safe position to have, as anything else will get you accused of moralfaggotry or edginess

As people refined the process of making other people feel bad through outright ad hominem and other degenerate forms of argument designed for the sheer purpose of attacking others, it got harder and harder to have legitimate discourse

Me and the DM used to date so I always get first choice of waifus and husbandos in our games.

Why you never try to fuck your weapons

What kind of sick fuck DM would literally cuck a player character for the sake of humor?

You want to try that first sentence again, chief?

Yeah. She was just gonna rape him anyway though.

Are you kidding? That shit is hilarious. Like nigga, grow some balls and fuck the woman who's throwing themselves at your feet.

My orc friendzoned this slutty bitch and her daughter

in an otherwise normal game DMed my friend's mother

whom I've been gaming with for over ten years.

Not enough Reddit spacing for you or are you an ESL?

Ok, we have mr. tiefling shadow mage and human sorceress focused on summoning. She has hots for him, even more after witnessing his fragility, inner depth and vulnerability.

So she finally confessed her feelings to him.
Mr. Tiefling is actually Ms. Tiefling and she was hiding her gender all along.

The sorceress got spooked and ran away, but they talked after a few hours and decided to remain friends.

Oh no you motherfuckers I won't you let get away with it. I have at least one session to use my GM powers and influence the story as to make them hold handsby the grand finale.

Veeky Forums, I need ideas! So far, I know they will encounter a shapeshifter with a wrong ideas about their relationship to make them think twice. What more can I do?

No it means you don't get the romance you were looking for, you can get friend zoned by a fuck buddy. The word you're looking for is cock blocked

He just said he was fat sad and alone

>Reddit spacing
Doesn't exist. And you also missed the "by" part that should have gone in front of "my friend's mother as well as most of the necessary punctuation of that sentence.

Stop acting like a twat and read a fucking book, nigger. Learning to write properly is a GOOD thing when you are trying to communicate via text.

Some women are into that user. They're weird as fuck.

Friendzone is gender neutral. It just happens to guys more because we(at least the more autistic of us) make a big stink over it. This is why you get /r9k/ bullshitery.

... God I want to slap your character

>doesn't exist
Yet

Here you are.

>Fucking thots
Das gay nigga

Really? That seems improbable baced on how luck works

Less to do with luck, more to do with taste. Humans like all sorts of things. There are peope on this very board who want to fuck spiders.

>Not lashing out at the scene and attacking the PC with his mace
>Not spreading the PC's ass cheeks wide open so he will still have his bitch by proxy of having the PC be his bitch
>Not just rolling to Smite Evil right on that spot, because an abstract form of robbery into that level of betrayal is definitely an evil act
A true cuck but also a man near true assholes

There are many reasons to despise Reddit. I suggest you learn about them and stop attacking a method of writing that was around on Veeky Forums years before Reddit was even founded.

Honestly I think Tumblr is the opposite of Veeky Forums but reddit is the unhappy medium that shares the flaws of both with few of the positives

I almost exclusively use it due to therrors super smash Bros melee competitive community gradually shifting towards it as a base for content aggregation...much to the lament of most of the important community members.

I hate that site deeply

make it a running gag where the party keeps stumbling onto and interrupting their hustles and get-rich-quick schemes

Cringed hard

I guess we take those. I was annoyed at his edgefag attitude and tried to combat it in a way that he'd have a hard time I responding to

Considering how much I love this board I should have abstained from interacting with him at all but edgefags are sad beings and I dunno man I felt like I should do something about it

My b user

Yeah we do, we just take it more gracefully than you guys.

Course you do. Because you know you can just find another one to throw your holes at.

>It happens to guys because we make a big stink over it

Your keyboard OK? I think you meant to say "because the sexual selection process favors women" but it came out all wierd

>Playing cute elf scout, based on one of the characters from a book I was writing
>Human wizard in party acts just like his love interest
>Witty, Smart, Believes in the goodness of people
>Always there for anyone when they need it
>Total Gooba, Makes people laugh, always falls for tricks and traps
>Wizard closest to me over everyone in the party
>Do some shady shit because of high ranking elfs make me
>Going to hurt the party short term
>"I trust you, How can I help"
>Party gets mad at me
>"Back off, Elf is our friend"
>Winks at me
>Flutterheart.jpg
>Hang out with wizard more
>Help with research
>Spends too long looking at books instead of me
>Just happy to be next to him
>He makes me an anit magic arrow because we get attack by evil magic user while we where researching
>Made from arrow from angel tree we ate lunch under.
>Npc Bard High Elf comes along, better at helping
>Wizard spends more and more time with NPC Bard
>Spends months locked away together without me
>"Lets Hang out elf, havnt done anything with you in ages"
>S..S..Sure
>Bard Tells me to back off
>Brake plans, can't say why
>"Oh Ok elf, if you can't say its fine. I trust you"
>ouch.png
>Wizard seems to want to say more but dosn't
>Corruption magic takes hold of wizard from bard
>Wizard turns evil
>Takes out the party apart from me
>Uses anit magic arrow
>He could of avoided it
>"I trust you"
>Mfw

desu and irl it's probably more of a cultural thing

girls have less riding on it, but at its core it still hurts the same

most people are too caught up edginess and irony to understand empathy on any substantial level or ignore it to vent personal frustrations or fit the board zietgeist

It's literally not gay as long as at least one of you is pretending to be a girl

Well its true

Never. They are either too charismatic or already married

nerve endings being nerve endings and with the way the prostate works, he'd lose that bet even if he was straight

false.

sex is always gay.

>sex is always rape
fix'd that for you, shitlord

>if you have sex with a guy it's gay because your banging a guy
>if you have sex with a woman it's gay because you're giving your virile masculine essence to a roastie and lowering yourself to her judgement to get sex

checks out. Chaste Wizard master race

>Sex with another man is gay because you're fucking another man
>Sex with a woman is gay because it means you're attracted to the most feminine thing in existence, and only flamboyant gay people could like feminine to that degree.
>Sex with a man that looks like a girl is gay because you get off to the "secret" masculine qualities
>Sex with a woman that looks like a guy is gay because you get off to the fact she looks like a guy.

To be honest, not really. As a woman, we really do it out of pity, but it gets misinterpreted. Like, I have a non-gamer boyfriend, but I enjoy DM'ing. Obviously, this doesn't mean I'm coming onto my PCs. (I've never dated anyone into my hobbies. My family prefers high-achievers.)

I dunno about you, but this one's a classic.

desuarchive.org/tg/thread/52702845/

It's actually theorized that humans will eventually evolve into two species. One being extremely attractive and smart, while the other is ugly and dumb.
Sort of like the book The Time Machine by H.G. Wells has the Eloi and the Morlocks. I can definitely see how that is a good assumption to make based on where I live. Most of the people around here are ugly as sin and have kids with people who are also ugly as sin and have children that look mostly inbred. Doesn't help that a lot of them do meth.

Ive got friendzoned by a sword before

was worried spoiler was rape
WEW

...

forever DM here so this is my player;
>be 20 year old vampire
>got bite at 10 tho
>forever lame male loli
>who will date poor little me
>oh hey this nice ~12 year old is also a adventure
>also she is grill
>make friends (being sure to not eat her)
>oh cool it turns out were the same class just dif types (pathfinder)
>still no fucking cus 12 year old

no idea why he won't turn her tho
I guess he likes her "innocence" since she's good aligned idk
(I kinda hope they fuck tho just cus I like the player but since he's not a fag like me, he won't fuck me)

This is why you only get emotionally invested in a woman AFTER youre already dating

I dont give a fuck about a woman until I already am sure we are going to go out. Hurts too much otherwise

>no idea why he won't turn her tho
He's a kid Louis. Why would he want to subject somebody he cares about to the same hell he's living?

I can subscribe to that logic.

>This is why you only get emotionally invested in a woman AFTER youre already dating

You must have interesting situations with your sisters.

cus misery love company
also he's evil and selfish, so why would he care about that part? he recently turned a rando who got brain washed by a succubus just to have a minion, din't even look into if the guy had a family to go back to or something, dam guy is going to wake up a vap next session.