This was a good campaign

how in the fuck was this even a campaign, I refuse to believe it ever even happened. I will tl;dr for this for people:

Four demigods - demigod of war, demigod of knowledge, demigod of nature, demigod of desire. They have a plan to overthrow the greater gods they work for so they can become proper gods. The demigod of knowledge learns how to destroy other demigods and steal their power. They all go around causing havoc and a couple other demigods get destroyed. The greater gods learn about their incredibly unsubtle betrayal, and shit hits the fan. The greater gods take the demigod of knowledge's wife and make him work for them. War happens. The greater gods send down avatars (made by the demigod of knowlegde) to fight. The demigods go to the place where the greater gods reside, and kill the greater gods while they're busy distracted piloting their avatars. The demigods become gods. The end.

Storyteim thread?
storyteim thread.

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sounds gay af

part deuce

Superior yu gi oh story

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If you're going to post some long-ass shit, at least make it something worth reading.

Anyone got any OC storytime?

>be playing dnd 3.5
>playing goblin wizard - name myself Sundance
>friend is playing half-fiend human fighter
>we don't understand how level adjustments work so he starts out 4 levels lower than me
>mfw I'm a level 7 wizard and he's a level 3 fighter
>DM warned us ahead of time he "wouldn't be pulling any punches" this game
---
>in a dungeon randomly generated with an online thing and fine tuned a little by DM
>lots of undead, nothing too terrible
>has one large undead something-or-other wandering the dungeon, we've been avoiding it the whole time
>finally realize it's blocking the way forward, the only way to advance is to kill it or sneak past
>we have no stealth; I prepared invisibility and already used it once today
>fail to identify monster with a knowledge check
>"Meh. It's not that big. We can take it."
>"corner" it in a room too small for it to manuver in
>fighter charges in
>I stay in the hallway since it can't fit through the doorway; plan to pelt it with spells n shit
>we both roll crap on initiative; it goes first
>round 1 it misses fighter
>fighter hits it easily, it doesn't seem to have damage reduction
>hit it with lightning bolt, doesn't make its save, doesn't seem to resist that energy type
>round 2 it hits fighter
>does over half fighter's HP in damage
>what
>DM pauses to re-read something from the book
>"Improved Grab. To use this ability, a gray render must hit with its bite attack. It can then attempt to start a grapple as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity.
>Succeeds grapple check
>"Rend. A gray render that wins a grapple check after a successful bite attack establishes a hold, latching onto the opponent’s body and tearing the flesh. This attack automatically deals 2d6+9 points of damage."
>Fighter is torn in half
>Literally TORN IN FUCKING HALF and dies instantly
>run in, grab what I can of the body, D-Door the fuck out of there

>rezzed fighter, gained a couple levels
>added a party member, human rogue with "shadow creature" template
>guy playing rogue is a little derpy, we helped him make his character and it ended up kinda powergamer-ey
>crits on 15 or higher, and gets sneak attack damage whenever he crits
---
>new dungeon
>killing trolls with fire
>find a ring of three wishes, one wish left
>holy shit we need to save this
>cleared out ground floor, descend to basement
>it's partly flooded
>mfw the water is waist-high for a human and I'm a goblin
>use overland flight all the time anyway, fuck walking I'm a wizard
>come to an alcove with a chest in the middle
>two trolls badly hiding, guarding it
>"They have no room to maneuver. We can take them."
>fighter goes first, charges, hits like a motherfucker
>they go next, immediately move to flank fighter
>fighter is down to like 1/4 health in 1 turn
>fuck. This is my fault, isn't it?
>I have to fly around the corner to have line of effect to the alcove
>I forget they have reach, I'm in a threatened square, spell provokes attack of opportunity
>troll catches me with a backhand swing and plasters me against the ceiling
>mfw I'm at -3 HP
>rogue doesn't want to move in, afraid of getting hit
>fighter continues to beat on the trolls, one of the trolls is nearly dead
>the trolls beat the fuck out of the fighter, he's dead again
>my turn
>mfw the room is flooded and I'm unconscious, face-down in the water
>DM says I drown
>fucking shitball cuntnugget that's not how drowning works
>party remembers that the rogue has the ring
>"Can I use it to escape?"
>"Yes, or you could BRING ONE OF US BACK TO LIFE!"
>he rezzes me
>mfw I'm facedown in the water with two trolls within beat-the-fuck-outta-me range
>stealthily swim backwards, then get out of the water
>fill the alcove with fireballs, finish off both trolls
>"Stick the fighter in your bag of holding. Write down 'Kalin's corpse' in your inventory so we don't forget."
>it won't be the last time

>we find a deck of many things and the end of a session
>going to decide what to do with it at the start of next session
>mfw my character doesn't like unpredictable magic and I don't like artifacts that can banish my psyche to an extraplanar prison for all eternity
>fighter draws 2 cards
>rogue draws 3 cards
>there is no way in fuck I am touching that thing
>fighter and rogue both gain a level, rogue also gains a small keep and a loyal knight, fighter loses 1d4+1 intellignece, rogues gets money
>"c'mon man it'll be fun, whats the worst thing that can happen?"
>mfw the worst thing that can happen is literally one of the worst things that can happen period
>finally succumb to peer pressure and draw 4 cards
>"Flames - Emnity between you and an outsider."
>"Balance - Change alignment instantly"
>"Moon - You are granted 1d4 Wishes"
>"Sun - Gain a beneficial medium wondrus item and 50,000 xp"
>mfw 50k xp is enough for five fucking levels
>"...huh."
>the party now has two level 9's, a level 4 cohort, and a level 13 fucking wizard
>also said wizard has changed from neutral to evil, and has some Wishes to burn
>we stop the session to level up and chose what to do with the Wishes
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>New spell
>Cacophonic Burst: 20ft radius burst, 1d6 sonic damage per level
>take feats so Empower Spell is cheaper to use
>New battle plan: spam 1.5x(13d6) Sonic damage at everything until it dies
>what can possibly go wrong

>yet another dungeon
>come to a locked door, we hear bad guys inside
>decide it's a bad idea to pick the door, they'll hear us coming
>we can see through the keyhole, looks like the other side of the door is safe
>somehow we decide the best option is for me to teleport to the other side, then either blow everybody up, blow the door open from the inside, or some combination of both, then the other two will charge in
>what could possibly go wrong
>cast invisibility on myself, then dimension door through
>still using overland flight all the time because walking is for mortals
>somehow set off poison dart trap when I appear
>fail fortitude save, paralyzed, can't even speak
>mfw I'm invisible, flying via magic, and can't move or talk
>fly up to the ceiling so I'm at least clear of the fighting
>other two party members get tired of waiting, crash through the door
>fighter is immune to poison, rogue evades darts
>they see no sign of me, have no clue what happened
>mfw I'll be over here guys
>bunch of drow or something, one motherfucker dual weilding bigass swords
>it's like 6 on 2, the fight drags on for long enough that I'm regaining the feeling in my extremities
>the fighter dies again
>for fuck's sake man
>rogue somehow manages to hide
>there's two bad guys left, just the big guy with the swords and one flunkie
>I think I have enough movement back to cast spells at least
>fuck this shit, time for everything to die
>empowered cacophonic burst
>invisibility dispelled, flunkie dies, big guy charges at me
>hits me a bunch, fucking ow
>I'm level 13, even as a wizard I have simply too many hit points
>fuck casting defensively, I don't want to risk losing a spell
>fly away from him, take more damage. Doesn't matter, there is no way he can kill me faster than I can kill him
>empowered cacophonic burst
>he charges at me, hits me again
>repeat runaway.exe
>empowered fireball
>he dies
>"I guess the fighter goes into the bag of holding again."

>other party members have leveled up some, I haven't because I'm still overpowered
>a chunk of Waterdeep gets overrun with some kind of zombie outbreak
>the whole area is quarantined
>the macguffin is inside the quarantine zone
>we had nothing to do with this, I swear
>go to a nearby temple to ask if we can help
>mfw it's a temple of Pelor and a half fiend, a goblin, and a shadow roll up and offer to help a bunch of LG clerics and paladins with their problems
>the looks on their fucking faces
>"Seriously though, we just want to get into the quarantine zone. We're not even asking for a way out. We'll fix this, since you can't."
>the clerics basically tell us that if we want to go get ourselves killed, we're welcome to do so
>somehow in our heads this gets turned around as us being hired by the temple of pelor
>"We're on a mission from god!"
>get to the perimeter of the quarantine zone
>"Who are you and what are you doing here?"
>think up a name for our party on the spot
>"We are Strike Team Solar Flare, and we're here to save the city!"
A couple days later, I made pic related.

>later
>in the mountains, befriend a tribe of giants
>the macguffin we're after is known to be in a castle that they used to occupy, which is now controlled by "the dark one"
>based on their description it's some kind of huge shadow giant thing
>convince the tribe to attack the castle, drawing out the warriors inside
>then I'll blow up the bridge so they can't pull back into the castle
>the three of us will then attack from the air
>empowered cacophonic burst x3 on the big stone bridge
>ogre mages out of fucking nowhere
>one cone of cold nearly kills me
>I used up my signature spell, have to resort to meager fire and lightning
>there's like three of them
>me, fighter, and rogue manage to kill them while flying, partly thanks to all the buffs I threw onto them
>see huge black thing standing on a parapet of the tower
>it's like thirty feet tall and I fail knowledge check; that can't be good
>stare at it, trying to figure out what it is
>it raises an arm and points dramatically at me
>DM: "Fortitude save."
>Me: "For what?"
>DM: "Just roll."
>mfw it cast Finger of Death
>mfw I roll like 4
>mfw I die instantly
>mfw there is no face, I am Sundance, leader of Strike Team Solar Flare, Goblin Wizard of Waterdeep, and I died in the middle of a battle we were winning because I rolled poorly vs a spell that's only usable once per day anyway
>Fighter and Rogue fly down to fight it
>it has a paralyzing gaze attack, which the fighter saves against
>wait a minute
>didn't one of my spells buff his saving throws?
>oh fuck, I was giving him +6
>dm says that when I died, my magic is dismissed (this was established in previous sessions)
>without the +6, Fighter fails the save instead
>mfw the Nightwalker casually walks over
>picks up Fighter's awesome sword "Lawbreaker" and obliterates it
>coup de graces the helpless fighter
>Rogue sees all of this and remembers he can planeshift to the plane of shadow 1/day
>He does so
And that was where the campaign ended. RIP, Sundance.

Thank you so much for sparing me from reading that schlock. You've done a great service for us all.

That summary is kind of along the lines of "A moisture farmer rescues a princess and then blows up a space station."

Fuck off. No one asked you.

Can you guys make brief summaries of other greentexts here? It's not that I'm lazy, I just like reading summaries.

oh it's the Story of the (Demi)Gods greentext. cool stuff

Wow, you sound like a particularly shitty person.

Nice butt hurt. Fuck off.

That is literally 0% about Yu-gi-oh.

Gonna be honest, I forgot what it was about until after I posted it.

I love that story, I agree.

Favorite of mine.

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>alignment change
Hey Veeky Forums

How exactly does this work? I thought your alignment was decided by your actions, not vice versa. For example, if someones character with, say, a lawful good alignment decides to continually commit evil crimes (e.g. murder for gold, rape women, etc) their alignment would change to chaotic evil or something similar. How is this reconciled with the fact that artifacts/whatever can change their alignment?

It seems contradictory, but maybe I'm just being autistic.

goddammit i hate how emotionally invested i get in this story every time i read it

The history of alignment is a particularly long one. However, the short version of this is you were expected to pick an alignment and then try to roleplay that alignment. Actions over a long time could potentially change alignment, or the magic item could force you to change, and then your character acted in that alignment's fashion. In otherwords, it was stricter and meant as a roleplaying guide, as opposed to being a label to shoehorn your actions into.

One of the stipulations with the deck of many things is that if you don't act with in your "new" alignment, you lose one level permanently. So it's sort of like a challenge of roleplaying. Can you make this character behave in the opposite way, morally, from what they used to behave like? If not lose a level.

Compare to the real-world example of infection by the parasite toxoplasma gondii, which has, in scientific study, shown that the infected exhibit far less self-sufficiency and lose much of their self-preservation instinct… among other changes. Those are the ‘artifacts’ in this case.

>doesn't specify what system is being used
Yeah this shit never happened.

Fair enough.

Learn to read bud.

Anyone have that story about the party who comes up against the ridiculously strong evil paladin hunting them, who turns out to be working for an evil empire whose paladins steal the powers of the paladins of other gods? Don't remember much about it except he was compared to Anton Chigurh, they shot him with a handgun, and they were all shit scared of him.

>don't have time
>waste time shitposting on Veeky Forums
Sounds about right

That bread was good

Exactly

I'm not reading that crap! Summarize it in one word.

This brings a smile to my face everytime I read it.

Holy shit that's amazing

But why? What makes it good?

Posting more from my venerable e-library of Veeky Forums stories. I hope you enjoy spiders.

Holy fuck, that's a great one. I'm so stealing that one. Speaking of good ideas, here's one I like a lot.

A most exquisite cap, and one I'm fond of.

Yes, and?

Managed to pull out this beauty. I just love crazy shit like this. Have an entire table full of random shit, makes me laugh every time.

The table in question.

Oh, I remember that. It's lovely.

Wow. Thanks for saving me from that

... And the story of King Arthur is about a guy who gets a magic sword from some watery wench, gets a bunch of knights together and makes some kingdom, then gets killed by his son.

Your writing has improved vastly. Its just that your stories are so boring

I finally found the Bard story he was talking about.

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I have no idea who you think I am but I'm not.

you can read the whole thing here
1d4chan.org/wiki/Desirebro's_Tale

This was the best campaign. Fuck the OP.

That campaign is reddit tier garbage.

Actual best campaign.

Seconded

Did these two make all the babies or what

If you go through the archives you can see he's posted since then. I remember at least one where he was storytiming another campaign but it was really late so there weren't a whole lot of people reading and he resolved to try and post it later.

Does anyone have the screencap of Digimon Tamers as a D&D campaign?

pretty good story

hawk seems cute

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Reads like a Powered by the Apocalypse system to me.

This one is my favorite.

Asking the same. I just don't get the appeal.

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>>They called their GMs Storytellers for some reason
>>Never figured out why since they were clearly familiar with tabletop terminology

Typical nigger.

I find it unlikely the other Gods would have just accepted a bunch of newly formed godlings who had the secret of how to consume them and end them permanently instead of, you know, seek revenge for their fallen comrades whom they have known for Aeons.

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>Never found the body
This is a revenge story waiting to happen.

Have some heart of the post number shenanigins

I always loved this one, never fails to rise a chuckle.

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>Pirates of The Carribean

CaRiBBean

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Reminds me of this

>I'm practically Legolas over here
I'm dead