Pet-peeves you have as a DM that probably aren't that bad but they annoy the shit out of you

Can we trade? My players will stop and spend 30 minutes rolling skill checks and doing everything they can to check a random vase because I mentioned it was red and had a floral design.

Of course, the end result of their investigation is "It's a fucking vase."

>Every fucking Rogue player ever, because they always dump Strength but still wana climb like they're in Assassin's Creed.

if my players ignore an important item, I make another decsription round with the item in it again.

I've resorted to rolling a secret perception check for everyone once per room and I send a whisper to whoever succeeded the most.

>4e
>"Alright PC, it's your turn."
>"Uh...what can I do again?"
>"...seriously, you're asking that again? For, like, the tenth time? Do you even read the rules beyond what your options are when leveling up?"

Does the obstacles you describe have one or a few precise solutions? If your player have to get in a specific mindset to find the answer, it may becom extremely hard to work it out, even if it may seem obvious for you.

One thing you could do is make up a complicated situation, but purposefully not preparing a solution. This way, your players can only surprise you.

Some people don't actually care about the rules or the game, they just want to post on Facebook that they play D&D and "lol I'm such a neeeeerd"

I walked away from the table and quit one day because I couldnt stand my players anymore.

There were 4
First
>constantly tried to convince npcs that their items were actually his at level 1
>would literally do this to every npc
>got mad at me when it wasn't working
>"you're targeting me!"
>quits after 3 sessions
(he's the current DM now. his campaign is all story and he doesn't even know how to fill out a character sheet)

Second, no problems, actually wanted to play and have fun.

Third
>know-it-all who always told me how to run the game
>always answered any questions the other players had, in a tone which implied he knew what he was talking about
>was wrong about things %90 of the time
>despite claiming to be most experienced one there, completely disregarded any rules that were inconvenient to him
>cocky as hell: "wow i really fucked that encounter on you didn't i?"
>party walks over to a bookcase
"you hear what sounds like a slight breeze coming from the bookcase"
>faggot says "Yeah! That's how DMs do that. I've done things like that before when I DM'd."
>he was the first DM in our group and it was painfully bad and unfun
>wouldn't let players do or even try anything, and constantly threatened to "kill us with a dragon"

Fourth
>on phone constantly
>"when are we getting food?" every week
>tell him to eat before he shows up so we don't have to order pizza every single week and halt the session
>instead of eating before he brings food over
>doesnt ever use napkins or wash hands after eating
>will put head down during sessions like its a boring school lesson
>yawns loudly
>loots a kill, I say he finds nothing of value
"mhmm of course"
>party defeats a large corpse golem
>say that another one rises from a nearby mass grave
"yeah, no" *removes mini from the table and refuses to put it back*

At that point I said "okay, I quit" and stood up and walked away.

Is this kind of shit normal? I feel like I over reacted sometimes but it was fucking unbearable.

>Players won't shut up about the wyrd

> Run a party of mostly newer players, with one of them being very experienced
> Inform the party that any questions about how their character sheets work should be directed towards this experienced player because I can't be fucked to explain how Proficiency works every session
> This experienced player volunteered to help teach them and generally does a good job
> One of the newer players disregards this experienced player, and asks me the dumbest questions every session
> "What doesn't AC do?" "How do I add proficiency bonuses?" and "What's a spell slot?" are common questions they ask me in the middle of sessions

I don't mind helping new players, BUT when you blantantly ask non-essential questions to me in the middle of games breaking the pacing, I get a little irked

Most of that was your fault, user.

How?

DO SOMETHING NIGGAS
IT'S CALLED A ROLE PLAYING GAME NOT A FUCKING THEME PARK
TAKE SOME INITIATIVE JESUS CHRIST

The point of a dungeon master is to give the players a good story ang agency to do what they will within it. Your actions like throwing a second encounter after the first come across as really hostile and detract from the story. Combat in d&d is a fucking meme, it exists yes but it should only ever be used as an ends to resolve an rp conflict. The problem mostly being that it detracts from rp by adding rng and it can completely ruin what a character may have had planned for their story. Remember, youre the story teller. The players are the story. That being said combat also takes way too long and can be seen as padding for an inexperienced dm.

Youre at fault mainly because youre ignorant, but you risrespected your ppayets. At least you cqn get anpther chance to not fuck up next time

The second encounter was going to be over very quickly due to outside help/story reason. You're retarded, and "combat is a meme" is not an argument.

This is why your players left. Youre an uncompromizing stupid asshole. Enjoy playing with the one person who will always love you: your hand.

not that user, but man do you sound like an traumatized cunt, where exactly did the bad DM touch you?

>1
You dont even let him try, or appeal to him once for rule of cool. Then you sound like a salty bitch when you play his game.

>3
Chad as fuck. If you werent busy being his bitch you could have asked him to tone it down. Instead you gave up and sounded like a salty bitch when you played his game.

>4
You got mad when your shit wasnt engaging enough because of your fuckin railroad then god mad like a salty bitch when your players got tired of your shit.

Yea nah youre retarded.

>Not that user
>poster count doesnt increase
Hmmm........

Poster count isn't 2 people, user

>damage control
Still doesnt change the fact that youre a fuckin moron whos just mad that hes bad at pretending to play a game of pretend in order to impress imaginary people on a himilayan cave painting web page

You're talking to three people

>"You can do whatever you like. Tell me what your character tries and I tell you what to roll."
There, not so difficult is it now?

Where is your game?

I have actually played these games, and ive eevn made one thats on steam. You sound like a child angry that other people are more successful in one pinky than you will ever be

That's fair criticism, but to point to that one thing and claim that literally everything is the DM's fault is asinine, not to mention how that one thing has nothing to do with the shit the other players pulled.

And to actually grab a mini and basically taking over the game as a player is fucking pathetic, regardless whether another encounter is dickish

Nigger his players didn't leave, he left his players
For someone who criticizes others over bullshit, you sure as hell can't seem to grasp the basics of what happened

I'm sorry, what? Are you just lashing out now at anyone responding to you?

Stop answering, it's extremely clear that he's trolling. Like, literal old school trolling. Don't respond to him.

Totally true story my dude. Plus hes a shit dm for not being able to handle his spagetti and instead running away when he could not have his way. Goddamn baby

Not really a pet-peeve or anything, but I had a player recently quit my game because my homebrew setting wasn't what he thought it should be. After months of complaining about everything that didn't match up with his headcanon.

Hahaha that deflecting.
store.steampowered.com/app/343150/Endica_VII_The_Dream_King/

You cant deny it. Youre fuckin jealous that i called you out on your bullshit and then ran over you with a lamburgini. Stay jelly you fuckin pleb, and enjoy your free form vampire rp you faggot

Oh yeah, that's obvious, but this is amusing me, so yeah

If the story is so fake to you, why are you bitching and moaning about it, user :^)

Players are a dime a dozen. Why bother with some cunts who were never raised to have basic social awareness, if you can just ditch them?
Also, it's clear he put up with their shit for a long time. Did you care to even read?

I dont care im just having fun quipping your tiny intellect and bruising your ego. You could have quit a while ago but its cpear you have a fetish for being humiliated in public. Your should be thanking me

But that's not a tabletop role-playing game at all?

>shitty RPG-maker tier trash
>"L-look at muh game! I'm better than you!"

Nobody denied you made a game, you're just being laughed at for bringing it up completely unrelated

At last I truly see

You linked a game with a 43% positive rating that has nothing to do with TTRPGs and I'm supposed to be jealous? Okay, I guess

Doesnt matter. You havent ever made anything. Ive created a rich and vast world that has entertained many people. I know how to keep players engaged and interested. You are a failure.

Uh no that was all hand made in game maker you idiot. You sound so mad that i made something to it is fuckin hilarious. Youre just like those salty trolls that left fake negative reviews because they couldnt stand the thought that an indie dev could make something and they couldnt.

Sometimes when they do that without context I say 'alright, you're surviving.' It's annoying to have to remind them sometimes but that's just how it is. I think there's a fair amount of unspoken understanding about what you wanna do but that's not a blanket thing and can be misunderstood.
>not letting them swooce right in

As an outside observer. I don't even understand what the point you're trying to make in this post is

I love how the thread died after i fuckin shut everyone in it down.

God it feels good to have an iq of 189.

...

>store.steampowered.com/app/343150/Endica_VII_The_Dream_King/
The days of shovelware have truly returned.

>Bitches about white people appropriating her culture
>Conforms to a standard of beauty set by white people
Hmmmm

People who bring snacks that are excessively crunhchy.

>So you break down the door, which slams with a reverberating thud and dust from the impac
>*MUNCH MUNCH*
>The baron looks pleased, and says that you may inspect his va
>*MUNCH MUNCH*
>So, do you want to take the left fo
>*MUNCH MUNCH*

Oh you sweet summer child.
You are ensnared by mediocre experiences.
Trapped in brown and bloom
Never escaping shitty d20 games
Forcefed propoganda non stop from media
A consumer
An animal
A hog eating slop
You are just that

Uncultured swine.

You wouldnt know quality if it slapped you across the face. Keep staying asleep dreaming of calls of duuty and dungeons five e. You will never know the joy of a truly honest QUALITY game.

>Game Maker
Buddy don't make this worse for yourself

What the fuck is wrong with game maker? Oh wait, you wouldnt know because you never made a game before and youre probably just parroting memes you found on reddit like a fucking homo.

Okay it's obvious that you have beef with that indie game maker and want him to look bad. What's the story behind your vendetta?

This one is for players AND DMs
>Excessively making your characters/setting, NPCs, and encounters based on other media.
I know it's fine to draw inspiration from things, but when a player hands me a sheet and says to me that his character is "Just Guts from Berserk" or the DM says that the monsters are "Just the Gargoyles from Dark Souls" or that the Gods of the game are "Just the Gods from Theros in MtG" that's when I say you're being lazy and I completely lose interest in whatever is being described.

You are absolutely right. I do not want to see his game successful and I will do everything in my power to make sure that he and his family and his wifes son's future are doomed.

Ok fake diet Phil Fish. Whatever you say.

>t. butthurt republican

>"Do I get a bonus to my persuasion check if I threaten her with my gun?"
>"Maybe. Are you going to do that?"
And then you give them a penalty to their persuasion check as punishment for being a bad roleplayer

>player misses a session due to over sleeping
>talks to DM afterwards to sort things out
>some time later DM informs us that he's no longer with the group
>player posts on the game's listing "REEEEEEEEE TYRANNICAL SHITHEAD DM, ENJOY YOUR SHIT GAME"
>all because he wasn't getting XP for a missed session
Why are people like this?

I've actually developed a mantra
>"On your turn, you can say a short message, you can move 6 squares, then, you can do a Skill Check or Attack an enemy. Also you may be able to do a bonus action."

It actually helps, Say Something, Move, Skill Check or Attack.
Now everyone gets it. They realized they can't do infinite free skill checks anymore.

Just let them roll, ask what they get, raise an eyebrow, then do absolutely nothing with that information.

I'd give them a penalty because that is purely intimidation not persuasion.

I have one player that always seems like he is trying to annoy everyone but I'm not sure. Example is we were doing a high lethality zombie game, I told him if he does anything stupid he could die and I won't fudge rolls to save him, then he decides to make his character a crazed veteran that picked a fight with the police first thing and died first session, and somehow I was the badguy.

>long introduction to setting/campaign via NPC who asks why they are here
>"I tell him why I'm here."
>get into new area and make any sort of skill roll with a nat 20
>"lol does the merchant give me his store now/Does the king let me fuck the queen/Am I able to climb the wall so fast that I can walk on the ceiling/other idiotic shit"
>gets to any part of a dungeon with actual difficulty
>"How were we supposed to know the cave with lit torches was inhabited/that we might need potions and be prepared/have a plan of attack before you ran into a room filled with enemies?!"
>Try to allow players to have some creativity in creation and allow homebrew shit as long as we talk about it before we start
>"Hey man I couldn't get on any time for at least 10 minutes because I'm a selfish cunt, so I just made this mahou shoujo loli vampire character. Hope its okay XDDDDDD"

Fuck players. Every, single, one of you.

God, I don't even run games and every single part of this post fills me with hatred except the image and the final line, those are the best

But why? Sensible people try their best to keep track of social cues and tailoring their method of communication to answer situational needs. If the mark looks like they will not respond positively to gun threats in the context of Persuasion attempt %%of course they won't, gun threats are Intimidation%%, there is really no reason at all for the character to do something so reckless.
%%Calling for some sort of a perception/empathy check to read the situation would be a good way to go for me.%%

>Players ignore the simple and obvious solution to a challenge and opt for a horribly complicated solution with a high risk of backfiring

Fucking god this.

>Group has an easy solution to a fairly simple problem.
>One player decides to break away from the group and try something else.
>Then complains when they have nothing to do while the rest of the party is doing their plans.
It's even worse when the thing they try to do is not only ineffectual but actively makes it harder on the GM to run a game.

>Players create plans which require all of them doing different things in different places, all perfectly timed.

>Players barge in and get destroyed by the hard fights
>Players overprepare and completely destroy the easy fights

Why does it happen every time?

Half of this thread is okay, the other half is a fucking dumpster fire.

>Remember game where we get a multi-part plan handed down by the Big NPC Bosses that needs every part of it to work perfectly.
>Have this big sinking feeling, sure, each step is very likely to succeed on its own, but we needed 5 separate operations to all work.

I have one guy who keeps 'noticing' references to thing in the plot.
Whenever he catches on he stops me in the middle if my sentence by going 'wait. Really? REALLY!?' and points out that he got the Mass Effect, Fire Emblem Fates, Assassin's Creed, or Sabaton reference that the rest of the players didn't get.
Thing is I have never referenced any of those even one time.
It has gotten way worse since the setting moved to not-Japan because now fucking everything is a Fire Emblem Fates reference.
>Players
>Reading the rules
>Ever
Hilarious.

Have you tried not playing D&D?

...

>%%

wtf

please tell me this isn't some discord or reddit thing

>mfw

I don't know about the others, but player 4 is clearly diabetic and needs medical help.

There's already another skill for looking for specific things in specific places. It's called investigation. If you're just looking around a room for something of note that's absolutely a perception check, if you want to really don't want to set different DCs for all the different objects and features in the room just get them to tell you which area they are specifically looking for things in.

As a player, I am guilty of this.
However, there is very little to go off.
>"What are you looking for?"

You fuckin' tell me. It's why I'm having my character case the place. It's not like I can say, "I'm looking for that discolored patch on the floor where a swamp ghost passed through it" because I don't know that exists yet.

Our DM gives basic room descriptions. i.e. "Stone room with damp walls and seven pillars with small figures on them". Of course we investigate the figures, but when that avails nothing we try to be perceptive.

How do I get around this?

thats why you roll investigate and not perception

>one player constantly complains about traps in dungeons and gets upset every time he gets a bad roll.

>another player only cares about combat. fitting, as he plays as a barbarian, but still very narrow-minded. while a game like d&d is based around combat for the most part, i also enjoy the exploration and social situations in roleplaying

>spend ten minutes focusing on something i mentioned while describing a room. for example, a candlestick. they are convinced it is the trigger to open a secret door in something, when it is really just a candlestick, nothing more.

>"i roll for _____" just bugs me because there is no prompting from me, the dm is supposed to tell them when they need to roll for an ability check

That's just it, though. We roll investigate when we are actively looking for something or at a particular place/object, and describe how we are investigating it to the best of our abilities.

We roll perception or more general information or awareness, and we get hit with "what are you looking for?".

What did they say when you walked away?

> ppayets
what

>player is obsessed with hylics and insists on making everything wyrd

You don't ask for Perception, you just ask for details about specific things until he asks for a roll himself.

"What's in the room?"
"Just a stain and a desk."
"What does the stain look like?"
"X Y Z"
"I go and check out the desk."
etc

Players two and four didn't say anything.
Three told me to jump off a bridge.
Honestly glad I stopped though, they were all playing "meme characters" heavily based off of other things. I'm almost upset with myself for putting as much effort into it as I did. No regrets though, it was experience.

I've met women like this. Fake nerds are the fucking worst. I hate that nerd stuff has become "cool".

>Players assume mundane item is super important

Had this happen when running a 5e playtest. The party was clearing out some barrows of goblins and they found a statue of the god of death in an alcove. They assumed it was hiding treasure or something, spent thirty minutes trying to dislodge it. Like a death god statue in a BURIAL GROUND is wildly out of place or something.

You did nothing wrong, DMing is a lot of work and if the players aren't gonna show you respect they don't deserve to play.

I really hope this is bait and no one's actually this entitled.

Second user got it right. Players asking for rolls to put one foot in front of the other is a huge pet peeve of mine. Just describe what you want to do, and if there needs to be a roll, I'll ask for a roll. 90% of the time there does not need to be a roll.

They've been trained by shitty GMs who make them roll acrobatics to get into their fucking pants in the morning.