Don't you just hate playing with couples?

sometimes they don't, but hopefully you can escape when you realize it

Yeah I do, not because they're actually doing something wrong, but because it reminds me of all my personal failures and makes me uncomfortable

Superhero setting is fine. Couples add spice to the game.

does anyone have the screenshot of the thrikreen/human lewdpost that ends with the DM yelling at the player couple about why he insisted one of them play a nonstandard race?

I played with a couple in a Star Wars game. The guy was playing a jedi, and is generally very protective of his girlfriend in (and out of) game. Then he started to think the dark side sounded like a good idea.

She mercilessly cut him in two. The look on his face was priceless.

She's gonna run Tomb of Annihilation for us soon, and I can't wait for her to kill his characters again and again.

Your own fault for playing with females, though it sounds a bit like envy to me.

No I don't know what you mean. Maybe it's that the couples I play with are in their 30's married, and stabile. So yeah. Most of the time their characters are just like any other character. They don't play couples they just play a character.

I stopped playing with couples after a campaign I ran destroyed a marriage and almost got me raped.

Well, I still play with some couples, but I kick them out the second problems seem to pop up. Seriously.

What kind of fucking ERP were you running?

>>very religious middle-aged german military man
>>teenage girl forced into homelessness because of her power
That's kinda fucked up, don't you think?

It wasn't an ERP.

I typically run fun, high-adventure games, right? I've had some bad shit happen to me in the past, so when I game I enjoy things to be a bit more lighthearted, with little dips into misery for effect. I had this group of college friends I'd known for like six years at that point, I typically GM, life's good. One thing that will come up later is the fact that I'm a cripple. I had Guillain-Barré syndrome when I was a kid, and my legs are all fucked as a result, and my arms don't really work that well. They're super weak, basically. Shit sucks, but whatever.

Anyway, one day the players come to me and ask for a darker campaign. I have no idea why they did this, but they said they wanted something that was more depressing. This was right around 2008 I guess, so maybe it was the economy. Whatever, I'll bite. Fuck it. So I come up with this concept about two powerful countries in a prolonged war with the players caught in the middle. One faction was super right-wing, big on genetic purity, that sort of stuff. The other was basically Stalin on steroids, murdering people that stood in the way of their "revolution," trampling individual rights, that sort of thing. The players were all from a border state which was the main battleground of the war.

Joe and Linda (not their real names) had gotten married after Joe got Linda pregnant. They were good friends beforehand, I thought it was a bit rushed, but whatever. Joe's playing a barbarian, Linda's a bard.

Initially, they start out trying to save their country, but that doesn't go so well. There's a lot of soldiers, they're very powerful, Guerilla resistance can only do so much. So eventually the players start fighting, right? If they can't beat both, maybe they join one.

Linda's character immediately goes to the fascists. They don't censor art quite as much, she's a bard, it's reasonable. Joe, of course, goes to the commies. He's a big fan of the idea of getting rid of large institutions.

The party splits pretty equally, so I decide to run two different sessions each week, one for each group. Almost immediately, Linda and Joe both start doing some fucking weird shit. I had this one dilemma for Linda where a minor child NPC from earlier was judged to be impure and she was asked to kill him, and she does it without breaking a sweat. Her (supposedly) good-aligned bard just beheads this 12-year-old. Joe, meanwhile, is perfectly content to slaughter several groups of parents who were "subverting" their children. These were supposed to be kind of hard choices, with outs, and they just went for it instantly.

After four sessions of this, both people start complaining to me about their spouse. It was mostly related to the game at first ("How the fuck could John kill parents, families are important" and "Christ, even in a game, it's weird she'd kill that kid. She's a mom. How could she do that?") but then it started to just become bitching about married life. Every time their parties interact Linda and Joe's character get into fights. Several times the other members have to prevent them from murdering each other (the party had a gentlemen's agreement to not get personally involved). And, at some point, the level of bitching becomes uncomfortable. They're basically just venting about their marriage problems at the table. So I get them both alone in an IRC room and tell them to stop coming, because everybody else is complaining. Like a retard, I also say something to the effect of "seriously, if your marriage is so bad, stop bitching about it and either fix it or end it. I'm tired of this."

This man is a cuck.

This apparently turned into this huge, blow-out fucking fight. I left the channel but Joe told me later they were up until four in the goddamn morning screaming at each other. They don't go to D&D. The remaining players eventually realize that both sides are fucking awful and use some assassinations to plunge the world into anarchy, with the hope of a better civilization rising from the ashes. Life is good.

So about two years later I'm hosting a party and I decide to invite both of them. They're divorced, at this point, but I felt bad and wanted to reconnect. Simple. Well, my roommates sort of turned it into something a lot bigger than it was supposed to be, there's more booze than I'd like, whatever. I decide to go to bed early because I'm not feeling well.

I don't want to go into the details of what exactly happened here, but Linda somehow gets into my room, piss drunk, and starts trying to fuck me. Apparently I'm like "the one who made her realize her mistake," or so she says. To be honest, I'm pretty sure she was trying to fuck a cripple to get back at Joe in some way. Well, I'm not up for this, because she's fucking nuts, so I say no. She insists that "You don't have to worry about Joe" and starts getting physical. I try to push her off, but, you know, cripple. So I eventually resort to fucking screaming for help, and my roommates pried her off me and kicked her out. I haven't had contact with either since.

It wasn't really D&D that did all this, I guess, but it still fucking sucked.

>having to get your roommates to pry stacy off your cock

get the fuck off my board chad

I mean, she was fucking me to get back at her ex, because who would ever fuck a cripple?

I've had sex exactly once before that and maybe twice since.

deminatrixs would like to fuck a cripple

epic meme chad but the jig is up, it's time to leave

also dont get your crippled situation get over you
remember ivar

We used to have a couple in my wargaming group. Honestly, the only problem it brought is that they wouldn't play against each other, and they were two of the strongest players, so they tended to distort team games.

Ivan couldn't get it up tho

I play with my GF in the same group, and that stuff doesn't belong at the table. The farthest we've gone was to have our shadowrun characters move in with each other for plot reasons, but they were not a couple. I think that in a group setting, couples should just treat each other as bros. I mean, if your partner is not also your bro anyway, your relationship sucks.

It can be annoying if they're in the early stage where everything they do has to be about each other, but when they calm down it's not that different from having good friends playing.

but nobody fucked with him

I've never had a problem when both halves of the couple are players. As long as you focus on playing the game and not PDA, you're fine.

My problem is when one of them is a DM/GM and the other is a player. NO MATTER WHAT, in every situation I've been in where a GM and a player are dating, there's favoritism and bias. EVERY TIME. NO MATTER WHAT.

Try to be as subtle as you want, but everyone at the table can tell you're fudging rolls in their favor. Everyone knows you're giving your SO cooler shit. I once was in a group where the girlfriend wouldn't even bother writing down damage she took because she knew he wouldn't kill her character off.

Don't even get me started on how they aren't afraid to start brutally arguing with each other out of nowhere, too. With a dm and player being friends, arguing and fights can be awkward and stifled, but a couple will just start flinging shit wildly at each other in front of all the other players and it gets so fucking awkward.

Play (and GM for) my fiancee all the time. In our regular D&D game our characters hate each other, its hilarious.

I have come across this phenomenon before and sure its a bit cringy but in my experience it occurs when people have just gotten together and they are still in that honeymoon zone. It'll pass.

tl;dr - Don't worry lads. Things will get better once you leave secondary school.

I hate doing things with my gf for this reason. She's extra lovey dovey when we do something with a group. I want to remain as neutral as possible and just be 2 people, but she insists on asserting her love all over me in front of everyone. Like calm down, we don't need to scream it at people.

The last time I played a DnD campaign with a couple the girl fell in love with me and now wants to cuck her boyfriend with me. I'm getting super nervous when people I know get a girlfriend now.

i will buy things that never happened for 20 alex

This. As a DM I guess that made me the alpha nerd. I used to get advances from all the female players in my groups; it pissed my gf off. Even now I'm running a Star Ocean game for a husband and wife and the wife keeps dropping hints at me. I'm happily married and don't want to lose the couple as friends, and their my most stable group, so there's no chance I'm gonna jump on that. Fortunately it's online so it's easier to keep it cerebral.

Would you be surprised if this happened at church or the club scene? D&D is no different, it's just men and women getting together playing pretend. Some nerds are more attractive or stable than others. It could be bullshit but it could be true; every woman I've known that's played has been at least passingly interested in at least one of the male players.

couples should all be gassed desu senpaitachi

My playgroup consists entirely of couples actually and it's fine.
Me >DM
My GF, my two buddies, my two buddie's GFs >PC's
Everyone is in a stable relationship of more than a year and there is never any favoritism. The one couple actually RP a pair of dwarven twins really well. I consider myself quite lucky.

but he is on tg

I agree with what you're trying to say, but I don't think you understand how jeopardy works.

In my experience, ugly couples in tabletop are way more lovey dovey than normal-looking people. Something in the lizard part of a neckbeard's brain just kicks into overdrive when he finds a female who will touch him. Likewise for your typical hambeast.

That said my regular group is two couples. The two male halves I've known since high school, and by this point I've been friends with their girlfriends for several years. Never had a single problem with any of them relating to lovey dovey shit.

They flirt with you because they hope that you'll give them advantages in game, dumb dumb.
All those waitresses weren't actually interested in you either. They just wanted a bigger tip.

It was her idea, we're playing them as two people on the run who come close and find love. It's supposed to be sweet.

i really get mad
most ugly nerds are ugly because they are fucking fat neckbeards

>if they go to the gym
>if they shave that fucking disgusting neckbeard
>if they cut their hair nicely
>if they try to improve their social abilities

then they would surely get a gf or two

What the fuck are you talking about? The ONLY REASON they are single is because they love tabletop, NOT because they are morbidly obese / never shower / MRAs

You must be new here.

I've only ever played with two, and neither did that.
Quit projecting your qualms onto your anonymous peers.

That said, both were insufferable, but for totally different reasons.
The first was a DM and his gf; his gf that was butt-ugly but would always make super hot redheads and act like every male pc was constantly trying to get into her pants.
The second was a pair of players, engaged at the time, and while the girl was totally clueless in the beginning she never learned or got better because her hubby basically played her character for her; she'd decide what she'd want to do and instead of taking a minute to read the sheet she'd ask him what to do and he'd just tell her what to roll and then whether or not she succeeded, even after I asked him to stop and let her feel it out on her own away from the table. Her turns easily took twice as long as everyone else's.

To be fair it was only the first couple that were really that bad, the latter was just sort of frustrating at most; their characters and play were fine.

>How they're always giggling and looking into each other's eyes and holding hands over the table and making their PCs also be a couple.
you have to be more than 18 years old to browse this site

adult couples always take out their shit on each other in games. I double crossed my fiance in werewolf by telling her I was the seer (I was) and that the player I knew was the hunter was the werewolf, that way I got enough votes to get everyone to hang the hunter so she could kill my fiance (actually the werewolf).

wat
no
tabletop is a hobby it doesnt make you automatically a loser

What I posted is what angry, single, friend zoned neckbeards actually believe

now i see

they are literally doing it because it makes you feel like shit.

he ain't even gettin' any, she just likes to tease.

No because other people's happiness doesn't bother me.

I'm the DM in a campaing consisting a couple. They are getting battle bonded, but the characters actually dislike each other.

I know, anecdotical...

How old are you and your gf?

>people make their girlfriends join the games
>they don't give a sliver of a fuck and just play on their phones

I'm a married man, I would absolutely despise to play with a couple, especially if they were lovey-dovey. Gilfriends/boyfriends or husbands/wives are not friends, they are girlfriends/boyfriends or husbands/wives.

i'm sorry dude

if it makes you feel better everyone you know, have known, will know, and anyone who will ever remember anything about you will be dead in 200 years so

nothing matters

true

This. It's okay to admit you have no fucking idea what a real relationship looks like.

In any case, it's the DM's fault for allowing OOC interaction to supplant the narrative.

I hope your girlfriend gets run over by a car.

I can only enjoy playing an RPG when everyone else has their lives sorted out, they aren't distracted by marital problems or girlfriend problems or money problems or health problems, when they arrive excited about the game and are interested in their characters and the other player's characters.

When something is wrong and you get people who have life problems holding them back or they seem grouchy about being at the game I can't stand it, prioritize how to figure out your life and get that handled before you engage in a social leisure activity.

>Long time friend takes the girls side because he gets pussy and can't say no

That is the worst. Got other friends who can, but terrible when they choose short time couples over friends they knew for 20 odd years.

As the other half of a couple who introduced their significant other to ttrpgs, yes and no. It can go just fine, or horribly wrong.

Me and my fiance are playing in the same campaign for the second time, and everything has gone smooth. We haven't played as couple characters, and probably won't, at least not as anything traditional. One thing I noticed was that we had maybe more daring social conflicts between our characters than the others. We have toyed with the idea of a forbidden, unrequited love kinda thing, eg. between a priestess and a paladin, but we'll see if ever. We just act like normal civilized people when around others and leave the oozing lovey-dovey for another time and place, especially since there is a person with a catastrophic relationship history in our group. Also because there's a gross landwhale brony who keeps making socially awkward remarks about relationship stuff.

On the other hand, I've witnessed how a relationship can be detrimental for roleplaying. When a good friend of mine started dating his ex, he was running his very first game, which she joined of course. Some favoritism was seen in the plot twists, but that's partially because of his inexperience too. Later on they joined a game of mine, with couple characters. It was kind of awkward at moments, as they really couldn't keep their lovey-dovey out of the game, but no one was bothered enough to comment about it ever. Nothing too glaring happened, but I think they took a bit too personally the things that were done and said to eachothers' characters at times. They eventually left the campaign due to life reasons, at different times, and we got some decent in-game drama from the character deaths. female disappeared, presumed dead, male shot himself over this at a time she was still alive, after going on a rampage against supposed captors.

All in all, playing with couples can be just fine. Or worse. Or better.

Depends on the couple.

No, it's pretty good.

You seem like a bitter virgin tho.