You are transported back to 1973

Get Don Kaye's heart checked out.

Buy Apple, Google, Bitcoin, Ethereum, Tesla.

Replace all dice rolls with coin flips

Not enough races will have darkvision in later editions

I tell them to give my dad a message to leave for me and my gf's family, telling her not to walk home on March 28 of this years but to wait for her ride. There were bad people on that route that night.

We miss you Sarah.

GORGONS ARE NOT METAL BULLS.
CALL STUDDED LEATHER BRIGANDINE.

GIVE UP ON THE D&D MOVIE.

Remove humans, dont trust the wizards.

Well I'm going to hell because I laffed

Wargaming is a secondary outcome of RPGs. Focus on stories and characters.

mean

I tell them it's a shitty idea and then publish it myself (ver. 3.5)

I don't get it, what is this referencing

>THAC0 was a mistake

Use raw stats instead of modifiers

>blames Lorraine Williams

>not the Blumes

This is how you spot folks who are late to the party. Williams is probably the only thing that kept TSR afloat long enough to actually attract a buyout. It was the Blumes who stuck the knife in the heart of TSR as it was.

I'd tell Arneson that it don't mean shit unless he gets off his ass and writes it down. Getting Dave to stuck dicking around would have helped everybody at TSR, and made the whole thing healthier.
Gygax, I'd just warn him not to trust the Blumes at all.

Only one? Ok.

Make sure Martials are on par with Wizards you dumb fucks.

They more or less were, up until 3e. Sure you could theorycraft a super wizard, but actually getting everything you needed to be that guy in practice was nigh impossible unless you had a monty haul dm who bent the rules for you.
And even then a high level fighter, especially in 2e, was a murder machine that spells tended to bounce off of due to excellent saves, and a spell save system that had yet to be badly broken by WotC.

Nothing. I have not the foresight nor the right to alter anything with confidence. Things are as they are, roleplaying is great and the last thing it needs is some busybody time traveler fucking it up for everyone.

Drop the system.

Drop the tables and just make it dice-based with simple addition. It's what you're eventually gonna do anyways, so you might as well save yourselves the time.

The only money I own is in a bank account that won't exist for about half a century. Any cash I could conceivably have with me will appear to be bad counterfeits, with nonexistent serial numbers and future minting dates. Any ID I have, photo or otherwise, will be useless for proving my identity. Even a birth certificate (assume I even brought it with me) will be useless as it's clearly from the future. I won't be able to buy food and it would be very hard to find a place to live. Oh, and as an amerifag millennial city slicker, I have never driven a stick so I wouldn't even know how to operate a motor vehicle from that period.

I have a handful of useful stock tips, but they're no good without seed money to invest with. I don't have detailed enough knowledge of any events from that time period to prove that I am a time traveler. If I had my phone or computer with me, I could maybe wow some people with it (assume I have the charger too) but unless the first person I meet just happens to work R&D for IBM, Xerox PARC, or Bell Labs, nobody is even going to recognize my device as a computer or understand how significant a battery-powered CPU that runs in the gigahertz range is.

Oh, and the local microbes will probably play hell on my digestive system. Even assuming the cleanest drinking water in the world, going back half a century means the bacteria you're constantly exposed to will be totally different forms than what your immune system is used to. It's unlikely to be life threatening, but I'll probably be miserable while my system adjusts.

So to answer your question, I have no idea what the fuck I'd say to Gygax and Arneson, I'll be too busy scrambling to figure out how to live.

Of course we treat Arneson as the one who *really* knew what was up; he's our patron saint, after all.
I mean, look at this guy:
>Is given the opportunity to alter the beginning of his hobby
>starts freaking the fuck out about how he's going to live in 1973 despite being specifically told he was coming back just to give advice; presumably he whines so much that he loses his chance and just gets back home
We're all idiots who think we're way smarter than we are, and don't need anybody's help to Get Shit Done. Just like Dave.

...

This

Don't let Blume into the company, just take a bank loan or fucking anything. Mortgage your house. Oh, and get a huge life insurance policy on Don Kaye right fucking now.

>if you use the word "race" in your book in 20 years a white supremacist will be president

Kill myself because there is no internet.

Every ten years, sit down and -completely- rethink how the game is played. Throw away the d20 every now and then if you have to. Just redo the entire system even if it doesn't need it. Game systems and communities of players calcify if you don't, and that calcification bites HARD when things need to change. Also, your first game is shit. You can't help that. It's your first game. You'll define a genre with it, but other people will take what you've done and make better things. If you risk a new edition and it doesn't work out you might fall behind for a few years, but in the long race you should win.

Also, when the satanic panic hits, don't take all the demons out of your game and make yourself irrelevant. There is no bad publicity. Double down on that shit and put even more demons in your game. Hell, make a half-devil player character race.

First post best post

Hire an editor, for pete's sake.

contact Pat Pulling and tell her that her son is a nut, and needs help.

I think the best move with the ssatanic panic shit is to just keep going as is. DnD was always a game about heroes slaying the demons, after all. The pastors couldn't keep the lie afloat forever.

I'd rather see tabletops recognized as games about heroism, as they mostly are, than to see a bunch of edgy "I wanna be evil and sacrifice my party to make a phylactery" players attracted to the game too early

Bill Clinton's a white supremacist?

>Of course we treat Arneson as the one who *really* knew what was up; he's our patron saint, after all.

I don't know how you got that idea. The guy had some wonderful ideas but he was a lazy piece of shit who had to be fired because he would rather fuck around DMing than actually get any work done ever. This left Gygax to try to do everything by himself, and that guy seriously needed a partner to say "maybe that's not a good idea, Gary" once in a while.
Seriously, what is your butthurt here?

Obviously, he was also a filthy Neoliberal

Don't ban China from the ISS, they'll just build their own and you'll waste time competing with them.

>your first game is shit
Imagine being this retarded.

>waste time competing
user...

>reading comprehension
I'd swear it was dropping severely on Veeky Forums if I hadn't know how shit it's been ever since the early days.

Ah, so you're pretending to be retarded then. Good to know.