Once, I made a thing. Now I made some more of it. Enjoy

Maybe it's meant to be a "recipe for success"?

>first page has a chicken soup recipe because lolrandom
Did you really expect anyone to read past that? Why did you waste your time writing this shit?

At first I thought it was meant to poke fun at him calling himself "Jewish user", since it's the stereotypical Jewish food. All the pages have recipes on them, though. I can't decide if it's retarded or sort of funny.

Just use Word formats instead of paint or whatever the hell you've used.

Not reading this, but it looks like each of the recipes is "relevant" to the genre of the page. I guess he thought of chicken soup as the baseline due to a Jewish upbringing.

I used Paint. The original system was created as a Veeky Forums post and hastily put together in Paint when someone asked for it in pic format. I decided to stick to it for sentimental purposes.

>Why did you waste your time writing this shit?
I'm sure I will rue those lost 3 hours one of these days. Think of all the masturbation I could've accomplished.

Why are there recipes on every page?

I didn't have enough actual content to fill all of it and fitting the art in with Paint was a hassle. I didn't really give it a lot of thought.

Is there anything worse than someone who thinks he's really funny but isn't?

Some of the ideas are actually not bad. You should've started with them instead of focusing on the hipstery presentation. There's some value there, but the way it's designed I don't think too many people will bother to give it a chance.

>I'm sure I will rue those lost 3 hours one of these days. Think of all the masturbation I could've accomplished.
You can't expect people to give a shit about something you don't. You want them to read your homebrew, put some effort into it.

>I'm sure I will rue those lost 3 hours one of these days. Think of all the masturbation I could've accomplished.
Don't give us that bullshit. Three hours or not, you clearly put effort into this. First, you're way too eager to share this for someone who doesn't give a shit. Second, even if the writing quality is absolute crap (and I'm not saying it is, because you do present some good ideas amidst the general douchiness), nobody writes in such an amount for the sake of a joke. So you obviously care about this game and want people to read it, because you put effort into it and don't want it to go to waste.

Now, from your style and the credits you've handily provided it's painfully clear what you're trying to do: you're trying to be Vincent Baker. The problem is that your'e failing to understand why Vincent Baker writes the way he does. Depending on how charitable you want to be with him, Baker either writes this way because his games generally try to make a very specific artistic statement (notice how Dogs in the Vineyard doesn't pepper every sentence with swearwords, because he understands that's not the tone he intended for the game), or because he knows that for good or bad people consider him the fucking Jean-Luc Goddard of TRPGs and he's swimming in so much critical acclaim he could sell his dirty handkerchief as avant garde gaming and people would buy it.

You are not Vincent Baker. You are obviously not writing any kind of satire, that hipster vibe doesn't suit your vision, and you most absolutely don't have the kind of career behind you that allows you to pretend you're shitting gold nuggets into the outreached hands of the audience. You need to show some good fucking work before you'd be afforded that kind of treatment.

It's not a bad game, but the presentation is awful and like you've been told before, nobody will read it this way. So if you don't want your work to go to waste, redesign your game.

>muh """star""" game designer
kys

Do you deny that there are people who’d buy any game with Baker’s name on it on principle, no matter how insultingly bad?

Respectful bump. You've buried it in shit and I don't even get why, but you did manage to produce a semiprecious stone.

Fuck them.

Read Part 1 and half fantasy.

Noice rules lite system for quick narrative play. Very reminiscent of 90's era LARP rulesets.

Not a fan of beef and mushroom pie, but a good meat pie is hard to find these days.

I'd rewrite these as single page PDFs or such.

You know, given that most people's grievances seem to be centered on the recipes and the art (and some even like the text), why not just remove them? Assuming he made this in Paint he might have a hard time transferring it to Word or another format but he could just cut those out and rearrange the text boxes like a page. Don't know if you could convert that to a PDF, but it might be worth a try.

Cool concept, but it takes a while to get there and there’s no indication it exists. If it looks like anybody other generic system, people won’t give it the time of day.

Personally, I’d look into trying and make the core mechanic about some kind of real life challenge as well. Just my two cents on the matter.

I actually like it that the core mechanic is still a simple dice roll. It keeps the game grounded and prevents it from spiraling into a tableside LARP.

Deserve a bump

Think you might be able to make it through the rest to give a more nuanced opinion?

I'll confess to liking the touch with the chicken soup. The rest pushed it, but the soup was nice.

So, I went and converted everything into PDF format, without the recipes or art. Now it's just pure rules, which judging by the responses might be what's needed to turn this from an unreadable atrocity to an intriguing concept game. Since this thread's basically dead, I might open a new one with it at some point just to see whether people respond differently.

Some notes:

1. Because the original was only jpegs formatting was an absolute nightmare, leaving many text sizes weirdly jammed together with huge white spaces. I'd put art there, but no, I'm not going to. If anyone feels like prettifying this emerald in the vomit, they're invited to do just that and add whatever art they wish.

2. I thought of making an appendix with the various recipes as a joke and call it "Jewish Hipster Douchbag's Cookbook of Douchery", but... no. Let's just keep it at that.

Damn, now it's actually good.

Kinda sad he didn’t just do that at first.

Hey, I remember this

The genre expansions are new

Was it any good?

It was pretty much the same. If you liked it now, you’d have liked it then.