Meanwhile on Demon Hunter Veeky Forums

Please do not call *His* name. You'll summon Him.

Never. It is never "ok" to start making pacts with Demons.

THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE STUFF!

What's that smell?

>tfw don't live in the Anglophone world
Thankfully, no Halloween for us. Festum omnium sanctorum though, in two days, fuck that shit.

>Festum omnium sanctorum though, in two days, fuck that shit.
Eh, what's the *worst* that could happen?

...

IGNORE THIS CALL! IT'S A TRAP!

I fucking said that something was going to go wrong, I fucking said IT. But noooo, we just had to take everyone who signed up for this one.

Oh quit crying, I lost another hand and you don't hear me crying. Besides, a bit of robotics never heard anyone.

YOU SEE, THIS IS WHY WE NEED A VETTING PROCESS

got bad news for you

>I fucking said that something was going to go wrong, I fucking said IT.
Most people knew that shit was about to hit the fan when Demons never seen in well over a thousand years started popping out of the woodwork.

>is it okay to make a pact with a being I am sworn to destroy.

If you have to ask this question you probably should not become a Demon Hunter.

I know I'm not.

...

I'm confused when user said "fuck Demons" did he mean literary?

No, unless they are demons that embody pride, it's a sub/dom situation, and you are the dom.
Even then it's a little iffy and unreliable.
But to answer you question, no.

Yea. Shove books right up their asses.

Wait, that actually works?

Im asking temporary pacts. nothing long term. stop over reacting you fags

With the bible, yes, but you'll need a lot of lube.

Fledgling demon here, when isn't it ok to make pacts with idiots?

>Im asking temporary pacts.
Nothing is "temporary" with Demons, you fool. You will *think* that it's just a "temporary situation", but you will have already well and truly damned yourself beyond saving by working with the Enemy. But since you seem like the sort to not listen no matter what anyone else may say to the contrary, you can enjoy getting fucked over by things made of fractal black-holes, or things composed of mathematical formulae.

Mostly here. Well as much as anyone can be when the town turns mad and you get voodoo and old school demonic shit

anyone here know how to banish a ghost?

Fine. It's okay when your seniors say it's okay.

And when do we say it's okay?

why would an ooze have a mouth, much less teeth?

never?

Demon here. brought me in.

AMA

asking for a friend
if i had a contract with a demon
where I owed him my soul
but there were several types in the contract
is it valid?
specifically my friend 'owws' him his 'sole'
if my friend gave the demon his shoes would that be good?

"Don't burn them at the stake," they said. "That's barbaric," they said. So I didn't, and look what happened.

WHO'S LAUGHING NOW

NOT ME

BECAUSE IT'S NOT FUCKING FUNNY

There is a REASON "just shooting it" does not work with most of this shit! What is it going to take to get people to grasp this? You can't "humanely" kill something with any major regenerative capacity short of actual, literal artillery! Werewolves, witches who know restoration charms, people possessed by basically anything - you either explode them or you burn them.

I mean sure. if you bound a spirit to the shoe then maybe. casting a spell to make the shoe sentient might also work.

But thats offering someone elses soul, which Im not complaining. but that just makes the contract a little less special.

Well Halloween was a fucking horror show. Demon realms and really old shit started popping up like crazy after 9 PM, me and my buddies were running ourselves ragged trying to shut all that shit down before the locals were touched, but they still got hit, took a couple blocks of the town out and a dozen civilians are hurt pretty bad. I lost three of my buds, and two more are slowly turning to moss, and I am down an arm and an eye, my good arm by the way. Only reason I'm even still awake is a mixture of pain killers, red bulls, lots of whiskey and some pain runes I learned back in my time in the army. So now were cleaning up what's left and trying to pick up the pieces. I dunno what the fuck stirred the bees hive this Halloween, but it was no where close to what it normally is, I saw some things that I've only heard of in my grandad's journals, things that havn't been around for decades.

I found the Book of Horus and read it front to back. Well, as front to back as is possible for a big ass scroll.
The magics contained in it are fantastic.

no no no its a typo
the demon spelled the contract wrong
he meant soul but asked for a sole
how does this work are there demon lawyers I hire?

ohhhhh. well a Demon cannot lie. so fuck that peculiar Demon then. yeah your friends fine.

whew! i mean... my friend will be refiled

I just want everyone to know that the fire in the harbor district is a tragic accident that could not have been avoided and that pointing fingers and shifting blame is not going to solve anything.
Also, don't go to the harbor district. Turns out setting zombies on fire makes them more dangerous, not less. Who knew?

what was that asshole. you better not of lied to a Demon. I can legally cast a curse on you for that.

"asking for a friend" is a legally recognized euphemism

....;.
Fine you pass.

I had to deal with cultists again this year. It was alright you know till they summoned that fucking meat monster. I can pretend to be cool with my new chainsaw arm I guess.

No matter how harmless the creature looks do not make a pact with it. There was a hunter a few threads back that tried to negotiate with a faun and ended up disappearing into the woods.

Serves the goatfucker right.

Why do Demons do *any* of the things that they do, dear Hunter?

We have also noticed an increase in the number of Demonic terrors this Hallows Eve, though we can't pin-point the source. We are sorry for the loss of your compatriots in the fight however dearest Hunter. May the Light bless their souls, or what may remain of them.

These threads really make me want that Hunt game being made by the Crysis guys, the lore for their world is pretty cool, I'd run a tabletop in it

>mom found the binding cricles

How do I convince her it's a real job? All she wants be to do is be a smith like my brother

Show her first hand your job. Bring her to a exorcism.

>How do I convince her it's a real job?
Tell her that if it wasn't for your part in hunting the terrors of Night, your entire town might have very well ended up devoured a thousand-times over by now. And if that doesn't work, we'll you can always open a peephole into the Aether, and allow minor Larvae to manifest before her eyes.

This guys a rape demon don't ever bring your mom to a job.

...

Most of myself, at least. Sure, I wasn't using that arm anyway, right?
I just want to know what else does it take the governments to outlaw halloween...

> not pre-rolling softcover editions into shape, then applying elastic bands...

You should make it easier for yourself, not more comfortable for them.

Oh no I just accidentally cut my weiner off will sense you have that other one just laying around.

>the absolute fucking catastrophe that was this Halloween?
So where the fuck do you live? Everything was completely silent over here. No great shambling beasts, no unknowable terrors from beyond the hells of hell, not even a fucking vampire bat. Don't think I wasn't looking, too, I spent damn near all night camping out in the deepest darkest parts of the woods here.

Here, there's usually some kind of overbearing feeling of impending doom year round, but this halloween was just as boring as ever. Even the animals slept soundly through the night, and they're usually jumpy as shit. Like, honestly? Pretty disappointed

And it wouldn't be the FIRST time you assholes got me all excited for nothing. I can't even begin to count all the LETTERS I've gotten and foolishly ignored warning me of some new terror coming to devour us all.

Fuck fuckfuck ok so there were some shady people in the alley round the back of my flat, nothing to worry about until they started singing. Weirdos in a back alley is pretty common in this city but this wasn't proper music, it made my skin crawl and I swear to God my ears bled a little. So I don't know what to do, I'm a trainee, all I've been taught is self-preservation and maintaining already-controlled situations but my bloody mentor's away for the evening on 'business'. I thought I'd get a better look but I didn't want to get any closer (sure as hell didn't want to go outside with them) so I got my binoculars and tried to see if they had any eldritch-looking tools or something, I don't know. Anyway, so I looked at the one who seemed to be leading the 'singing' and she locked eyes with me, like she knew exactly where I was. Obviously I freaked out a little and closed the windows but the singing's only gotten louder and I'm certain I can see the sounds drifting through the air. What the fuck do I do? How do I fix this?

You go out there and do what little you have been trained to do, which a generous dose of shotgun based improvisation. Get out of there alive and you graduate to the darwin school of veterancy.

I'm in England and it's just my flat, I don't have a shotgun. I haven't even passed handgun training. At best there's kitchen knives, rope and null salts

>So where the fuck do you live?
We are a vast hive-mind that merged with the spirit of a Hunter near his hour of death, so we aren't affixed to any *one* location. We got to see the devastation from multiple points because of this. The fact that you didn't hear about that one city being swallowed up by a gaping maw, or several well-populated towns turning into Meat-Moss, is far more surprising dear Hunter.

>You won't be here for long, don't worry. The Board Fun Police will put you somewhere else soon.
Came here to bemoan this.

I'm jealous, we got fucked pretty hard out here. All of our veteran's got turned into kids and shit now I have to step up.

>All of our veteran's got turned into kids and shit now I have to step up.
Are their minds and original personalities still intact at the very least? Because they can still pass off their knowledge in that case.

Nah that's the fucked up part complete reversion. Me and witch bitch have to keep em for now while we sort it out. Children are more terrifying than the demons we face sometimes.

What exactly happened to cause this my fellow Hunter. Please tell us that it wasn't a Demon of Time. Those things are particularly vile, especially when you take into account what they can do with the full force of their power.

How do you get rid of the chopped off head of a demon lord?

Somebody told me Holy Water and Chlorox can dissolve it, but it's still intact after 17hours and keeps saying really mean stuff and upsetting our resident priest.

I live in the middle of nowhere. Typically the forests here are crawling with the most aberrant terrors the deepest pit can choke back up. So imagine my surprise when there wasn't an encroaching march of black lambs baring dim torches, that came in the night and hauled us away one by one to invade and re-release back into society to infiltrate and devour the unworthy.

I really expected at least something to happen, with all the hype you guys were drumming up. Not to mention things have been eerily silent for months prior. So good for you, I guess. I wish something interesting happened around here once in a while. Devils clad in hides of wool so stained with blood the crimson is deeper than pitch, eyes smoking black, horns twisted and thorned, you know that sort of thing. Even though I guess I should be grateful that there isn't some eldritch terror crawling beneath my skin that whispers and wails in a thousand different voices, barely able to move my own limbs.

But I guess there's a FIRST time for everything, so if anything comes around I'll send a LETTER to keep you all updated. I never know when i might NEED the HELP.

>But I guess there's a FIRST time for everything, so if anything comes around I'll send a LETTER to keep you all updated. I never know when i might NEED the HELP.
.........Dear Hunter, why are you capitalizing these specific words? Is something wrong?

Beg your pardon, nothing is wrong, evrything isi as it is memeantant to be be be, perfectly safe. Little thing I do sometimes for absolutely no significant reason, YOU know. A quirk you pick up living with the GUYS out in the styx, we all have something a little off about us. Can't say it has any real purpose. Kills the boredom a little.

Look, I'm just rambling I guess. Actually I guess I'm pretty thankful that nothing out here has come to SUCK out my soul and feed it to some unHOLY monstrosity only for it to SHIT it back out into some shambling abomination. Maybe I'm just being as irresponsible and foolhardy as I usually am that tends to get me in way over my head. But nevertheless, it's not like there's some GREAT CATASTROPHE and WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE or anything, so who am I to complain.

Oh, I see. Looks like everything is above the level, then!

Mostly... I mean at least I have ONE of my legs.

All is calm all is bright.
All is calm all is bright.
All is calm all is bright.
All is calm all is bright.
All is calm all is bright.
All is calm all is bright.

A lot of salt and iron usually works for temporarily banishing them.
For permanence either burn the item that holds them to this world or get a priest to perform a cleansing rite.

Dear Hunters, we may have a situation. Can anyone trace the location of this "hunter" so that we may get a better grasp on what we are dealing with here?

Looks like its just down the street from me... brb.
If I don't post back in ten minutes... JUST WAIT LONGER

sniveling simpering swallowing swelling saving sighing sickening sickening sickening
the night was just the start, there will be no dawn to save
do you feel them KINDLY HUNTERS
do you feel your crimes, your crimes of life, crawling onto your backs, digging in and drinking the spinal fluids
that isn't marrow in your bones, KINDLY HUNTERS, it is hell, it bleeds in through the bone, it seeps into your blood stream, it becomes your humors, we are hell, KINDLY HUNTERS, we are hell walking, and the night shall not end until you all become aware of this
all is calm all is bright

according to my recon it looks like he's snorted some sort of demonic hallucinogen and is running around his house completely naked.
Anyone have a 50cal I can borrow? I feel the need to obliterate everything within a meter of him.

We Come Bearing News
Our Empty Eyes Have Witnessed The Hallowed Night And Have Witnessed It's Consequences
Something Has Come Through
The Walls, Weakened By The Night, Have Been Toppled. The Road Is Being Paved For the Parade Of Demons That We Have Seen With Our Empty Eyes
Though We Scour The World, Even Our Empty Eyes Cannot See What Has Come Through, But We Can Feel It, Even Now We Feel It, Something Enigmatic, Something Immense, It Is Eclipsing Life, Right Beneath The Conscious Layer
We Will Continue To Watch, But We Fear That We Are Being Watched As Well Now, The Walls Of The Temple Quivered The Hallowed Night, The Walls Quivered As If Something Knocked Against Them, We Are Not Sure How Safe We Are Now
Stay Safe Hunters Of This World, For As Long As You Can.

Do we really need two ambiguous evils taunting us at the same time? Fuck's sake guys who's supposed to be keeping this channel secure?

We have this. An "old friend" gave it to us some time past. It seems like it would be good for such a situation.

I blame the Canadians

The channel is secure. Thats what makes it all the more worrying.

Note that this has a chance of setting the spirit free or changing its haunting intensity for the worse. The best solution to a bound spirit is just to leave it alone if you can or learn to work around its quirks if you can't.

Alright, I'm getting sick of this shit, something bad is creeping up on us all, I saw fucking shades creeping around the steps of my mansion last night, THATS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE POSSIBLE

Fuck it, I'm waking up the knights before this shit gets any worse, at least then they'll be up and awake when it DOES get worse.

Good news: grenades made of iron and filled with of a mixture of salt and explosives works really well especially when said grenades are shoved down a demon's throat.

Bad news: now missing arm used to shove said grenades down demon's throat

I spent Halloween chauffeuring hitchhiking ghosts around till morning. They always get more substantial around the holiday and I don't want any stupid teenagers pissing them off.

LOOK TO THE SUN
LOOK TO THE SUN

We thank you once again for your warning, Eyeless Ones. Yes, our kin have also noticed the weakening of the veil, it is much weaker than it normally would be in such a situation. Several of our own have also been reporting "Eyes Watching Them From The Dark". We shall take measures to keep a constant vigil on this situation, and to warn others in case it gets any worse. Take care of ensure your own safety as well, O'Eyeless Seers, and may we exchange knowledge once more. Should we survive this, that is.

This isn't a quest thread so that's not appropriate. And it's not like the mods delete the /tgdragon threads so calm yourself and get in character.

Remember these words. Any of these words. If you can remember even one, and can remember it with conviction, it could save your life.
>The lion
>The crayfish
>The albatross
>The ant
>The well
>The sheepdog
>The child
>The northern star
Do not forget. Do not forget. They will make you forget, but you must not. If you can remember, you will stay safe.
The beetle protects.

Bless the Chlorox genius.

Well there's your problem. Get the priest to bless a scouring pad and start abrading away the flesh, letting the scraps fall into the Holy Water/Chlorox mix. Once you're down to the bone crush it to dust and pour that into the mix too. If the mix starts luminescing in any way add more Holy Water till it stops then start over with a fresh mix.
Oh and you'll want to wear proper PPE, demon fumes are no joke and slashes will burn like mad and leave nasty scarring.