Hey Veeky Forums, if you were to play an all-monster D&D campaign, what would you play as?

NILBOG
THE self-proclaimed GOBLIN KING

DEIGNING TO ALLY HIMSELF WITH LESSER MONSTERS, THE DARK SHAMAN WILL PROVE HIMSELF WORTHY OF HIS nonexistentTHRONE

Lizardfolk, no question!

The DM, so I can play all of them.

The Summon spell
jk probably a skeleton

...

HAHA! I'M A FUCKING CARRION CRAWLER BITCH!

>all skeleton party
>bone puns
>constant disguises to get into human settlements
>only person who knows is a friar who gives you quests based on rumors he heard
>lots of "AHHH! I remember ole Jonas! Took me several minutes to best him in a tournament."
>lore checks everywhere as the party goes down memory lane
>get to the boss and start chatting, start old formal greetings, laugh and half ass the fight
>get done and start talking
>"this friar basically just tells us where to show up and we get to see our old friends"

Something gross.

Elf. The most vile monster of all.

An Aboleth probably.

Prolly a cute female goblin.

Or an orc. Maybe a fatass big-bird style owlbear.

Possibly a slime (they'd have been a former adventurer who pissed off a wizard and got turned into a slime; basically, they'd be sentient but mute, and now trying to avoid being killed because they look like any other nonsentient monstrous ooze)

Skeleton bard. I could tickle my ribs in rodomontade.

Imagine the puns. Imagine.

Mimic

Assuming non-humanoid...probably a rust monster, actually. Just go around eating metal and being happy about that. I'd be a simple, nonviolent creature who mostly wants to make friends, but adventures always run away from me for some reason, and that makes me sad.

Until one day one of the adventurers just gives me a simple dagger or rail spike or something cheap, an then they realize that I don't care what kind of metal I eat. Finest plate armor or tattered scraps, it's all the same to me, and it's not like I'm voracious and just eat until there's nothing left, I ca get full.

Then I finally have a friend and we go on great quests together.

The greatest monster of them all.

>being calcium prowider for your party
UHUHU I'm starting to rattle over here!

Lich, obvi

>D&D campaign
Aboleth ofcourse.

I already answered, but someone else can use this Spellweaver.

Mindflayer, any variation.

Spellweavers are awesome.

Always wanted to play a mind flayer. They're cool.

Jesus christ you monster.

A human farmer.

Nexus Dragon.

I did this once. I was a salamander.

It was okay.

I played a Mind Flayer Barmaid once.

In Apocalypse World, we were very drunk at the time

Minotaur.

Orge Mage

A Chimera Wizard
Each head sets up different spells and they always fight each other for who gets to use the Spell Slots.
I'd have to roll a 1d6 to see which head is in charge of the Spell Slots at the start of combat, and if I'd want to let another head take the wheel I'd have to either give a really good in character reason or a Roll a 1-20 and get a 18+, where getting a 3 or below means that the current head will refuse giving over control for the rest of the encounter

Mindflayer. Or minotaur.

Fishman/Kua Toa
Currently playing a midget fish with tard strength.
Mean old cunt with a spear, looking for the fucker who sold him as a goldfish when he was a guppy.

>Friar, your guests were found in the archives again.
I apologize, Father, I fear we are being tested with their presence, yet they are the only ones brave enough to delve into the long forgotten tombs
>You test us in the same way by humoring their intrusions. Another friar reported to me they were so drunk on stolen wine they cackled and pretended to be heros of old.
I apologize fo...
>READING THE OLD SCRIPTS AND MOCKING THEM AS INACCURATE AS THEY SPILL WINE DOWN THEIR ARMOR! Things of war in our temple! What if they ruined the our writings?
I will try to talk to them
>(sigh) It's always the same. Send them on their next errands on go back to your studies. I must find out where our milk has disappeared to. These people are not good omens.
Father, I find it easier to not think of them as people.

Prolly be an ogre or troll. I'm a simple dude who likes big, dumb brutes.

Minotaur. I'd be really pissy that every dungeon didn't live up to my inflated labyrinth standards.

A nothic looks interesting.

That's a funny take on minotaurs that I haven't seen before. They seem like big dumb brutes but they have a very deep understanding and appreciation for architecture.

>using milk instead of paste made of sardines,cale,spinach and yoghurt
4 SPOOKS C'MON

I played in a monster-only campaign, where I took on the role of Beatrixe, as 5 meter tall bone golem, created by a necromancer to protect his wife and one true love from any and all harm. It only got activated decades after his creator and his wife have died, and his magical programming is corroded. Only the name Beatrixe remains, so he has taken this as an identity and believes himself to be a rather posh victorian-age lady.

Harpy. I'd like to play a character that's trying to civilize her own people to create a society instead of just roving bands of crazy asshole bird people.

Can you make a mindflayer out of a minotaur?

Tough decision. Gorgon, maybe? Or, since this is D&D, I suppose it would be a medusa.

This, or some other kind of hulking brute with a rare dash of brutal cunning and intelligence.

Serpentfolk.
I then proceed to play him as exactly what /pol/ thinks a Rothschild is like.
Complete with intense hand rubbing.

Mindflayer is best monster PC,

Mintflayer, the fresh fighter

Purple worm

Depends. Is the DM a Dick? If yes, then a convoluted combination of templates all (legally) stacked on top of a minor mind-controlling parasite bonded to an ordinary human via the Symbiotic Creature template, so despite the parasite being an ECL 45+ creature, the resulting character has an ECL of 1, before classes.

If the DM is not a dick? Kobold.

>Hey Veeky Forums, if you were to play an all-monster D&D campaign, what would you play as?

We did ones of those in college. Ended up playing a group of heroic kobolds defending their village from evil humans.