Worst role playing you've seen?

Killing people who are committing victimless crimes should be LN at best. You'd probably have a better case for killing the pimp/madam and setting the prostitutes "free" from their only source of income.

>be peasantfag
>save enough of my wages from labor to hire a prostitute
>not_gonna_be_a_wizard_now.tapestry
>she looks amazing, huge tits and nice face
>all of a sudden random knight bursts through the door
>starts shouting something about god and decapitates my wench
>yells about sin and leaves, stealing my hat on the way out and says its for his crusade
>bastard blue-balled me and wasted my medieval bitcoins
>mfw doomed to become a warlock

>Middle Earth Wrestling

And in this corner once again is the most unlikely of belt-bearers.. FRO-DOOOOOO UUUUNNNDERHIIIILLL

I had this one guy for a while, who would constantly make nasty, assholeish characters that would try to "subtly" betray the party, often with all the grace of an axe to the face. THen, when his dumbass plots was inevitably discovered and he would be murdered by the rest of the party, he would laugh heartily about how great that was, and roll up another character who would do exactly the same thing.

Only in, say, 5e, in which LG is "literally whatever society is ok with."

LN can get away with almost anything up to a certain point. Jigsaw shit can wind up being LN (Lady of Pain, Wee Jas, etc) somehow for example.

>victimless crimes
No such thing, for the criminal himself is the victim.

*at least* he took failure in stride

Imagine if he threw a shitfit at the party murdering him

I had my characters commit suicide so I could make a new one and have a chance of rolling better stats. I was like 9 at the time though.

I wanna ask how the fuck somebody would attempt to murder the entire rest of the party and then throw a shitfit when they killed him instead. Sadly I've played MOBAs, so I don't doubt this occasionally happens.

That sounds like it could have been fun, to be honest.

It wasn't. It derailed anything else you ever wanted to do within a game, and of course, all of his characters after the first one or two were greeted with sullen suspicion, so his betrayals lacked anything but bored inevitability. I'm honestly a bit surprised that the rest of the gang never attacked Eric's characters immediately when I tried to introduce them.

would be more fun if he helped create a group on NPCs for the party to constantly deal with. each failure results in the guy's next younger brother coming back for revenge.

>cock ring of power

And just like that we're neck deep in Mormonism

What

Nice.

...

The rest of my group are well adjusted adults, except this one dude who literally was at the LGS during our first session and just sort of invited himself. Beyond constant fudging of his dice.
All of his characters:
>Are chaotic neutral so "he can justify any action he wants them to take"
>can be described most accurately with some anime, I guess
>have a backstory which involves being too strong and being cast out of some community
>come with a bunch of anime picture to show off what they look like

>His most recent character is best described by the phrase: dothraki Samuri.
>We have some in game downtime where he describes taking off his armor and character is covered in scars.
>Another player bites
>ohno.jpeg
>ten minute monologue on why he has scars
>begins as a tactical description about how he plans on attacking a dragon cave. Cringe, boring, and awful.
>other guy tries to stop him by talking to him, just keeps going

Literally the worst. Trying to convince the group to boot him

>Literally the worst.
I'd be lucky to have players so invested in their characters. He obviously needs to work on some things, though.

Why does peasant meme bypass all my resistances to laughter

Had one guy directly play as the guy from Archer in a generic medieval setting

user, this is a thread for the worst roleplaying you've seen, not the best.

Probably myself. I was like 12 and found the old role playing custom maps back when Warcraft 3 was the big thing and was just generally terrible. Thankfully no one remembers those.

To be fair, medieval Archer would be the archetypal murderhobo

Gastric band of power

Satan, As promised I here by grant you what we agreed to.

Marik Lugan Had a Odd child hood, he lived in the deep forests of Myth dranor with his mother, one day in the forests of myth dranor his mother sent Marik to go get some water and fire wood for dinner that night. when he got back the place was empty, and he found his mother dead in her bedroom. * marik was only 9 then* he looked around for any sign of notes or anything but he found nothing. as he knew his mother was a which ((with a huge histroy in the past that he did no off)) most boys were frighted of whichs. but marik never realy meet other people other then his mother. infact he didnt evan know who his father was. He soon discoverd how hard it was in life to live with out his mother around to do the other choors of the house, he barely lived throw this hard time till he got the hang of things. at the age of 11 A thout came into Mariks mind about the room upstars his mother told him to not go into and all costs. but now that she isnt here he had the idea that it woundt hurt to look. he came into a room filled with magicly items and cystal balls and many other trinkits. but what he was fasanatid the most by was the huge book on the table. he walked to the table took a chair and sat, and tryed to open the book, he than relized he needed a key but befor he got off his chair. he notice some words on the book. for thee to read this book you must Read the books of the 8 forms of necromancy. Necromancy he Said in confusion? he then looked in the books in the book shelf. and only found 5 books containing necromancy. He then study them all for 6 years and later moved on to the other books to see if there usefull.
>To be Continued.

he also found out about some real powerfull magic that he cant yet use. After he masterd Book he decided to set off on his Quest to find the remainding 3 books. (he was a level 3 necromancer by this time) He moved from myth dranor-Immersea-Waterdeep-Gold coin but found nothing of such of the books. he had some things to do here and there but all ended up in minor magics of necromancy. he then heard rumors on his travles that 1 of the most powerfull necromancer books were held at the temple of myrkul at Ice wind dale. he later travled to this ice wind dale and later found a huge tree full of life. he then saw the mage tower and went to there. the mage told him not realy anything helpfull but the mage did have some spells to offer and items. he later heard rumors of a tome and so he went there. He found many undead things and battled his way throw the tomb till he meat this Ghostly knight, the knight told him of his past of being a warlord and that he knows of the book you talk about. but he will only give you this book if you do something for him. he also Added that some other heros like him were here some years ago as well. The knight told him that you must kill some Druid that keeps disderbing my resting place. since you killed all of my guards, i have no one to protect me from this druid said the knight. so marik went and killed this druid. the knight said ahe yes. the book. well im afriad that you will never find it foolish necromancer..... said the knight. marik then got filled with rage and he casted a lighting bolt at the ghostly knight.
>To be Continued

But it seems it did nothing to knight as the knight laughed at him. marik then started to scearch the tomb. he then found were the book was and to his serprise he found the knight as a undead blackguard guarding the book. the knight chuckled and said to him ah so you found out were it is... im sorry about this. knight raises his great sword. but i will have to end your life right now. marik stood silent. then the skeleton knight charged at marik. Marik douged the blow and then drew his dagger to Stab it into the neck of the skeleton knight, and to his benafit. he left that dagger in there wacthing the dagger put the knight to slow death.. (dagger of undead slaying buyed it in the mage shop in the mage tower in keldahar for 2500 gpkills on hit dc 14 ) he then toke the book and left. 2 years later after travles he heard about rumors about the 2 necromancer books being held in shadow moon.

how's this?

Tl;dr it's a set of undergarments Mormons wear that has a number of symbols important to the religion stitched in it.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Temple_garment

As the orientation says: Gay

Peasant meme is the GM's girlfriend that everyone is jealous of.

>No Brother, I do not want to fuck them, I wish to kill them
your brother seems more fun then you desu

>>We have some in game downtime where he describes taking off his armor and character is covered in scars.

>How you'd get all those scars?
>I fell out of a tree as a kid.
>...You got all those scars from one tree?
>It was a big tree.

There was a "round the twist" episode about that I think.
Magic speedos that let a kid jump onto airplane wings and lift cars

Think they shrink in the wash though so no matter how hard he tries he can't wear them anymore without crushing his nuts.

Oh, you would be surprised at the That Guy stories that crop up

>that guy who always plays epicly randumb characters
>is always chaotic neutral
>does shitty voices that break immersion harder than anything else

I have this little gem, which I hope I've managed to resolve so it won't harm the rest of the game. Namely a troublesome, bigoted Human Fighter.

>Multiverse campaign. Homebrew; any race and class is permitted if it is sufficiently balanced.
>Even NPCs come in all flavours.
>Group of 4: Human Fighter, Human Druid, Elf Rogue, Tiefling Bard.
>First encounter, initiate introductions.
>Fighter starts treating the Bard like shit.
>Somehow a Tiefling still seems too untrustworthy in this setting.
>Bard doesn't do anything to defend herself.
>Bard promises to not be trouble, cross my heart.

>Fighter leaves the group

>After some shopping, the group reunites with Fighter later in a tavern.
>Fighter is still being a jerk towards the Bard.
>Fighter is questioned about it, but doesn't explain himself.

>Bard gets pickpocketed, which distresses the Bard.
>Group goes to the guard house to report the crime.
>Fighter instead tries to have Bard arrested for possessing a poisoner kit.

>Bard doesn't have a poisoner kit.
>IC, Fighter has no knowledge of the Bard's possessions.
>OoC, Fighter should know that the Bard doesn't have a poisoner kit.
>This metagaming is on a whole other level of stupid.
>Fighter is trying to get an innocent person arrested because of baseless bigotry.

>MFW Fighter is supposed to be Neutral Good.

Everyone at the table calls the Fighter out on his bullshit and makes him agree to stop being a jerk. Now everyone is actually having fun playing the campaign as intended. They are trying to uncover an organised crime circle of thieves.

I miss those Veeky Forums quest threads like those civilization threads where you chose your race.

/qst/ is dead and the departure from this board was a mistake. Only fun had here

>religions in a distinctly medieval-europe flavored setting with classes inspired by feudal crusaders
>not acting like christianity
lol, muh fantasy god holds slutwalks because he's not a shitLord like Yahweh.

>Rip off Ultima Underworld 2 shamelessly
>I.e. they're trapped in a castle by a colossal spell, which forms a huge energy barrier that they can't break down. The spell, however, is sloppily cast, even if it does involve rivers of power, and there's a flaw in it, deep in the basements there's this giant magical gem they can use to project themselves to other worlds, which contain things they can use to break down the barrier.
>Along the way there are problems. One of them is that the barrier has cut the castle off from its well, and people are getting thirsty inside.
>As they explore, the party comes across an underground river, in what is of course a horrible monster infested area. However, because they're powerful, the monsters aren't that dangerous, to the PCs at any rate.
>Run back home, report about the water source, and start trying to organize a bucket brigade of the castle servants.
>Servants are understandably reluctant to go where they just described there are a bunch of yetis and other beasts
>Players don't get why. They're not dangerous at all.

>

"Hey, wench! Don't give me that look, if you're in a tavern, it's called a wench. I'm Silver Bowman, world's best assassin. I want some of that swine piss you call ale, and you can leave the barrel at the table."

That's not what a bigot means, user

>mistake
You clearly meant to type
>correct.
Silly autocorrect.

My own story would be about a foolish teenager I allowed into a Shadowrun 4e game and he rolled a D&D character and completely misunderstood basically everything about the world. I was way more forgiving than I should have been, but I was a fresh GM then.

I've typed it out here before but I can do it again if anyone cares.

My favorite part is how the author got more and more into his story as it continued and started caring less and less about grammar or spelling and just was just writing cause it was awesome.

>God's
This honestly makes me more angry than any of the rest of that irrelevant shit.

Agreed.

...

>bigoted
>against tieflings

kek

>Keyblade Weilder

/qst/
Also nice trips satan

/qst/ is dead because rejects like you spend more time shitposting on Veeky Forums than actually posting quests where they belong.

Good riddance to bad rubbish, I say.

Where do you think the whole "but just playin muh character" meme comes from? Always a player who throws a tantrum because the party decides they're done with the asshole's bullshit.

But user, even the race description of Tieflings say they should face a lot of bigotry for existing. They are literally the spawn of Satannic beings.