First time DM here, nervous as fuck

I'm reporting you to the FBI you sick fuck

Fuck off, frogposter.

The worst thing a GM can do is take away a player's agency over his character. If a player says his character attempts something let them try. Make sure there are consequences for their actions though otherwise that's taking away their agency also.

Not show up.

>Alternatively, my buddy always tells us that he never has a plan; he's just built the world and lets us do what we want to do, with repercussions stemming from those chosen actions.

Honestly, this is the best advice I can give you: As a first time GM, you are going to assume your job is to tell a story. That's a really easy way to think of your role in the group.

It is, unfortunately, totally wrong. To tell a story, you need control over what happens. And the moment the players arrive on scene, you lose control of what happens next. This is fine. This is expected. But it does mean that any carefully crafted plotline will be derailed or disposed of unless you can really hook your players and they march to your beat.

What you want to do is create a SITUATION, with some obvious hooks for the players to get involved. You do not write a murder mystery. You Plan a murder, know in advance who did it yourself, and let the players deal with the situation (or not) as they see fit. Why? Because by planning out a murder mystery, you just made the implicit assumption that *the players care who killed the guy*. They might not. They might notice the grieving widow and spend the rest of the session trying to woo her so they can marry into the husbands estate, gaining a sweet house in the process that they can sell for more sword buying money.

So come up with a situation. Find a way to get the players aware of it and preferably involved in it. Then, for the NPCs involved, figure out who is likely to do what if the players DONT resolve the situation? In the above example, what the players don't know is that the murderer is coming back for the wife the next night to finish the job. Either they are there doing their stupid bullshit when the attack happens, or they find the body and now they are invested in hunting down the murderer because he screwed with their plans.

>What's the worst thing a DM can do?

Getting too attached to how YOU want the story to unfold. It won't.

Jesus christ user, simmer it down a bit you degenerate.

Fucking this. I also hate when DMs say how my character attacks when I hit with a weapon. I also had a DM that would always say "your characters would know X, no need to roll". Excuse me, why would my character know that???

He's right. Don't be an asshat.

Fuck off, frogposter.

How is the DM saying the party automatically has knowledge they probably shouldn't have in any way right?

The more you get triggered by a cartoon frog, the more people will post it.

Fuck off back to your shitspam boards, frogposter.

Not practice the 3 Rs of Reduce, Reuse, and Recycle.

Not the guy you're talking about, the guy you were responding to.
Taking control of a player's character, as DM, via no-save charms or railroading or whatever, is a really shitty way to take a player right out of the game. Saying shit like
>I also hate when DMs say how my character attacks when I hit with a weapon.
is missing the point for the sake of sophistry. Don't be an idiot.
In your case, by the way, the GM letting you know what is or is not common knowledge in the setting has nothing to do with player agency in the first place.

How about... no?

>DMs say how I attack
what exactly do you mean?
from what I can tell he's just not letting you go
>I teleport behind him, katana unsheathed, before he can draw breath or notice my killing intent I've already slashed through him as if he was made of butter. as I turn around I hear the upper part of his body slide off and thud against the ground.
>I snicker, "nothing personal kid"

getting caught in glaring inconsistences and fudges

Shoot themselves at the table

Black light party/rave

this

Maybe I should clarify, I was agreeing with the player agency part and then adding on stuff I don't like which to me is kind of related. Sorry for being unclear.

The setting was one where the party all had amnesia, the party wasn't from the area, and the DM would constantly say "you would know this" without any explanation on why we would know it. To me this is railroading the players into having game knowledge they likely shouldn't have for whatever reason.

It's a really simple thing that kind of bothers me. I've had DMs that describe how the PCs kill stuff with their weapons. I feel like that should be up to the PCs? Not "nothing personal kid" shit.

>I've had DMs that describe how the PCs kill stuff with their weapons. I feel like that should be up to the PCs?
I try to do it in-between
>PCs ask to attack
>I ask how they do it, or just to roll to hit if they don't care
>if they hit, describe how they hit based on how they attempted the attack
>if they miss, describe how they missed based on how they attempted the attack

...

You could try not frogposting.

Not have fun.

Anyway, remember, if your players are new too, they won't notice your fuck-ups. And if they're experienced enough to notice, they'll let it slide because you're a friend and DMing isn't easy. You do play with friends, right?

Also: if your players want to do something you can't handle (ignore the adventure, kill a crucial NPC, skip a plot point) feel free to say "sorry guys, your idea sounds cool, but I wouldn't know how to handle it, can you do something else". You're new, you're allowed to do that.

Alternatively, call a ten minute snack break and write shit down until you know how to handle the shit in question. You'll learn how to improvise faster as time goes.

This is now a frogposting thread. Post all of your rare pepes.

Fucking your girlfriend?

I don't know about anyone else here, but if I've jerked off even a day before, it's much harder to cum and she feels self-conscious.

She doesn't know how lucky she has it, she cums at the drop of a hat.

If it doesn't improve, try again during the game, it is an ice breaker, eases nerves and asserts dominance.

not read the table and adjust accordingly

mediocre GMs detected

RAILROADING

be flexible and let your players make the game

Quit on their players.

This. It's really subtle but it can changes a lot if you say things like "your character is trying to do x things but visibly, it isn't working" instead of saying "you can't do that."
The end result is similar but the first implies an attempt from the player where as it seems you are completely blocking the PC from playing by stating what he can and cannot do.

Yep, this

Probably the worst thing is to use players as an audience for your own story. Players need to have agency, and planning too far ahead in the campaign will cause you to steer them in particular directions that they may not appreciate.

To avoid that, have a "main" path in mind but also have a set of encounters that can be used without any kind of setup.

There are some cool ways to railroad without breaking the game. For example, make the plot move independently without the players.

This. Don't PLOT extensively.

PREPARE extensively. Names, places, situations, objects. The players have the pedals, all you need to do is steer.

Its not the WORSt thing you can do as a GM

Railroading in any game that isn't being labelled as mystery solving.

I'm looking to be a first time GM, and just winging it is what I have in mind, honestly. I don't want to railroad players, and I've been in railroad games before. My biggest issue is making encounters that are too powerful/too underwhelming, but my thoughts on that are to stress that not all fights are going to be winnable, and to allow for unusual ways to beat encounters.

Whether everything dies or not, players get the same experience points, possibly more for more interesting resolutions, or those particularly in line with their character and beliefs.

I have general plans for plot, but it could be resolved a number of ways. I have no solid methods or routes, just ideas. A party that relies more on stealth, subterfuge and underhanded tricks would be just as viable as a party of paladins and clerics storming the front door to deliver a divine boot to the ass.

One of the worst things you can do is ignore players. In my past, I was a fairly shy player, and I'd often go hours without saying anything, then get put on the spot by the GM. I never felt involved, and that was partially my own fault. But at the same time, the GM had a habit of focusing on one or two players. Try to ensure each player gets a chance to be a part of a scene, rather than the backdrop. Make them feel involved, rather than an extra. Encourage them to be involved in the plot, and help them get into it if they don't know how.

The other worst thing is fudge a roll and make it obvious. Never let a player know you're fudging a roll. You know that exhilaration you get when you roll a natural 20? You get the exact opposite when a GM has obviously fudged a roll in your favor. It feels demeaning, you feel like you need a handicap. So never reveal to a player that you're rolling favorably for them.

I've heard watching porn but not masturbating before a wrestling match turns you into a testosterone beast. Plus your unitard hard-on might make the other guy uncomfortable.

Complain all you wanr, but just know your autistic rage only makes my dick harder

...

>feeding the troll

Reap what you sow, user

>What's the worst thing a DM can do?
Ask Veeky Forums for advice, really.

I think Veeky Forums is unfairly maligned by its posters.

Frogpost

But Veeky Forums consists of said posters.

What do you mean by agency?

>What's the worst thing a DM can do?
Making sure, at every turn, that the players have absolutely no fun at all.

Agency is the idea or feeling of being in control of oneself and oneself's condition, environment, or situation. A good way to remove player agency is to make them feel like they have little to no control over what's going on. This can be a good thing when things are going to shit and they're surrounded by pissed off guards, but generally a loss of agency is bad. It can be caused by things having seemingly random consequences disconnected from the character's actions, the character not being able to affect their environment in any meaningful way, or, at the most direct, a GM 'forcing' a character to act a certain way against the player's will (IE, saying "Your character would do this, and they are doing it").

At best, in the case of horror or frightening situations, a loss of agency brings fear and uncertainty that supports the mood of the scene of campaign. At worst, it makes a player completely uninterested in their character or even playing the campaign, because they feel nothing they do will matter anyway.

I had an experience like this. I was basically forced into comic relief. Every time I tried to do something heroic or otherwise, the GM would find a way to make it go comically wrong, assuming the dice didn't screw me.

That GM deserves to be punched in the balls until his balls are more pancakes than balls.

tell her stop dropping hats on her pussy

Would you say charm/fear stifles player agency, since it imposes an emotional reaction on their character?

Not him, but yes, definitely. So does getting killed. Charm is just creepier because it lets the GM control the character to an extent, which is why you have to choose carefully when to use it against players. I think it helps to include plenty of "flavor" when I charm a PC, to let the player continue to have input on their thoughts and actions to an extent but still including the charm effect. Things like leading sentences to show that the PC is still the PC, just that their mind is temporarily under magical influence.
>me: WIS saving throw, please.
>P1: Ah... shit. That's a... 7. Shit shit shit.
>me: You stop thinking briefly and consider the gnome's point of view. You've been pretty unreasonable so far, haven't you?
>P1: Shit, I'm charmed. Guys, help.
>me: In fact, you feel a strong impulse to defend him. Your so-called friends all look very angry at him for some reason. They look mean!.
>P2: My turn, right? I roll to attack the gnome... fuck, a 4!
>me: P1, your friends are senselessly attacking this innocent gnome, who only wants to escape! Quickly, attack P3!
In an ideal situation, P1 gets in on the fun of things and starts thinking proactively about how or why his character's twisted mind rationalizes helping the gnome. It helps to have a good player for this kind of thing, though.

Said posters have issues with their sense of self-worth.

Am him, and I'm going to say yes, definitely, just like that guy. On the other hand, I'd be expecting P1 to actually role-play it himself, which helps a LITTLE, instead of just telling him what he feels and making him roll a bunch. But the thing with this is different. While it can stifle agency, it depends entirely on the player and their reaction to it. If they really hate it, try to get through it fast like in the other user's example. But most role-players will see it as a challenge or opportunity to try and work with it, those are the players who generally won't feel it as an attack on their agency. Agency no longer seems like a word help

Players should either provide descriptions of their character's attacks or else let the DM do their job.

Inhale. Exhale.
Your job is not to know everything, just to put on a brave face and act like you know all the rules.
Getting bogged down with excessive rules-lawyering makes the game boring, so don't be afraid of using the DMs fiat on your first session. Better to use your authority as DM to make a quick ruling and move on, rather than spend 30 minutes looking up the rules for being on-fire, for example.

admit they're nervous as fuck
fake it till you make it friend

>Agency no longer seems like a word help
It's OK, that happens.
I like your idea, but the only thing is that I'm pretty sure in D&D, charm effects mean that whoever is doing the charming can make their victim do what they want.

>admit they're nervous as fuck
not true, I admitted to my first players that I was nervous but excited and it went pretty well

Don't overthink what will be achieved in the first session. Session 1 is never that big a deal in the grand scheme of things - you'll most likely feel pretty stoked once it's over, as will the players, but it probably won't be true start of an epic-scale campaign. Just try to achieve something relatively concise in the first session, eg the party clears a cave of goblins or whatever

It does, but that doesn't mean the player doesn't get to role-play themselves doing it. It's important to note that these spells don't explicitly put the character under GM control, they just force the player to RP a certain way.

Important DM Rules:

>1. Remember, you're the only person who knows what was supposed to happen.
If the players go off on a strange aside. Or if you mess something up (forget to attack, lose track of HP) just go with it. Never admit you messed up. Just go with the flow and try and get things back on track as quietly as you can.

>2. Understanding the big picture makes it easier to understand the details later.
Don't get too hung up on details at the start. Understand the big picture, what factors are in play and who is manipulating what. Once you understand that it becomes easier to fit in the details later as they become important to the story. It's more important that you are consistent with your details, than that you have ever minor thing planned.

>3. Plan puzzles and situations, not endings
Your players are going to take the story down strange paths. And if you railroad them down the story you want, everyone gets bored. Instead give them situations to solve. That way when the mind dominate the BBEG, or hire him instead of killing him, you can still have a working story

Big disagree on most of these.

1. Remember, you're the person they think knows what's supposed to happen, but you actually don't, because their agency trumps your prep and you play specifically to enjoy that.

2. Understanding that you can make the big picture up later frees you to keep the focus on the details in-game.

3. Never do puzzles. Create situations that play to what the players prefer and keep changing the playing field whenever it looks like it might get boring.

Railroad relentlessly and inflexibly

Be boring.

/thread

Meh. A pretty common technique in certain types of public speaking is that initial disclosure. It takes the pressure off and endears a bit while setting the bar nice and cozy-low

>1. because their agency trumps your prep and you play specifically to enjoy that

I'm talking about prep. If you plan an encounter and the monster has 77 HP, and you lose track. Don't say "oops, sorry, he should have died last round". just roll with it and have him die next hit. Or if you planned a trap and they walked right over it and you forgot to spring it, don't be a dick and 2 rooms later say they all roll the damage. Just ignore the trap for now and work another one in later. When I say "you're the only one who knows what's supposed to happen" I'm talking about the reactions to the players actions. Or the prep of the rooms/NPCs/story points you make.

>2. Understanding that you can make the big picture up later frees you to keep the focus on the details in-game.
I dunno really what to say here. Storytelling 101 is understanding the big picture so you can be consistent in your story. If you know X NPC is a double agent to start, you can slip in little hints and story beats to make that reveal stronger. Also understanding NPC motivation is SUPER easy if you understand roughly where they fall in the world. Agree to disagree on this one.

>3. Never do puzzles
not all puzzles are professor layton riddles. Combat is a puzzle. A conversation trying to get what you want out of an NPC is a puzzle. What I was saying is, never make your campaign dependant on your players giving you a specific result (ending). Because they will take the story in insanely different directions half the time. Don't plan "I need the players to save this damsel in distress to kick off the next plot point". because half the time they'll just burn down the tower the damsel is in and loot the corpse for gold and magic items. Instead provide a situation "damsel in distress" and if they burn down the tower, react with "who would care that tower/damsel is gone" "who might now be after the party for revenge", etc.

>Never do puzzles

Fuck you, riddles are fun.

Bonus points for physical room puzzles that can be bypassed with some thought and creative use of character abilities.

>Excuse me, why would my character know that???
Because they have lived in the setting for far longer than you, dingus.

That's honestly the best way to do it, in my experience.

As someone developing a seeting who is new what are the "checkboxes" I need to tick?

e.g gods, names of cities etc.

>if I've jerked off even a day before, it's much harder to cum

I'm sorry the jews took your manhood user.

How did it go, OP?

Fuck with the game because you're unhappy OOC.

>First time DM here, nervous as fuck.
>What's the worst thing a DM can do?
Overreact and become discouraged when things don't go well. Just do the best you can; the best you can is good enough. And remember that DMing is a skill like any other; you get better at it with practice. So don't worry that you might make mistakes. You will. You'll probably be pretty clumsy at first. But rather than letting that stress you out, you should just accept it. Nobody gets on a bicycle for the first time and expects to pop wheelies and do tricks and shit. You're gonna take some spills before you learn to ride the thing decently, and that's no embarrassment.

It takes a while before you're any good. But even if your first few sessions are flawed, that doesn't mean you can't still have fun. And it doesn't mean your players can't either. Unless they're complete cock-knockers, they're gonna cut you some slack as you learn the art of GMing. And if they aren't understanding, the fault is theirs, not yours. So relax. You're gonna fuck up, and that's okay.

You know the Three Laws of Robotics ? Well, here are the Three Laws of DMing.

>First
A DM may not cause any of his players or himself to have an overall bad experience or, through inaction, allow any of his players or himself to have an overall bad experience.

>Second
A DM must see his campaign to its end except where doing so would conflict with the First Law.

>Third.
A DM must respect the plot, setting and rules as long as such respect does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

Sticking to those three simple axioms, you quickly fall back on most GM advice.

>tl;dr: some examples on how this work
For instance, the Rules. Third Law dictates that you should know them, but if there's a rule that neither you or your players know and searching for it would slow the game down, First Law dictates that you should wing it.

Similarly, the predominance of First Law over Second Law dictates that no game is better than bad game, and yes, you should drop (or give as satisfactory an early ending as possible) any campaign that has grown toxic or boring for its players.

Finally, note that just because rules, setting and plot are theoretically last doesn't mean you cannot be a screeching autist about them: it just means that, as First Law dictates, everyone must be screeching in unison. If your whole group loves to sit down and pore through rules for hours, then do so.

yeah disregard this guy, if a player does not volunteer descriptions feel free to flavour text the fuck out of combat, otherwise it's just a bunch of guys rolling things, all crunch and no fluff

0. Having IRL problems at the table (sexual harassment, that one guy who can't hold his liquor, a smoker indoors with an asthmatic, etc)
1. Fetish shit. Modern political shit.
2. Ignoring when players are having no fun or refusing to change when they are.
3. Acting like an ass when things go wrong
4. Not having a plan or the ability to improvise
5. Elitism
6. Allowing rules-lawyering. At the same time, heavy-handed rulings that detract negatively from source matetrial.
7. Overly-linear or restrictive play, e.g. "railroading".

In order.

ding ding ding

Don't say "no". Say, "Yes, but..."
Which is to say: Don't railroad them, but still give them options. If they want to go west and you were expecting north, let them go west. They will find your "north" idea off in the west, just changed a little. Your mental map is modular, their mental map is fixed only when you tell them about it.

Be open, try not to be "cool" and have tonnes of secrets. Your players don't care, they just want to have fun. Some secrets are necessary but you'll get better at that later.

For you, starting off: Literally just simplify in all repsects. You don't have to roll for everything, just thing that might have a chance at failure. If you are running a d20 system I feel bad for you, but even that can be simplified.
"Omg this monster has an AC of 12, but the other one has an AC of 16, and the locked door has DC of 15"
No. No no no, Screw that, You don't care, you aren't here to do your tax forms. You are just getting started. You are here to have fun. Everything in this room has a AC/DC of 12. That's it. Easy. Boom. SOLVED. Everything can be simplified. Take it easy.

Protips:
-Come up with a few simple characters with motivations and personalities. Your PCs are going to meet people, and you aren't going to know what to say.
-Only ever think about the nest session. Don't build a world: Build a night of gameplay.

>-Only ever think about the nest session. Don't build a world: Build a night of gameplay.
Addendum to this: think A LITTLE about the next session, because if your players get through everything you were planning to do in the first session in 20 minutes, you're going to have a lot of improvising to do. At least thinking about things a bit before they get to that point is good.

Other than magical realm shit

Don't steal their scene with cool NPC ideas
Don't try to railroad them too hard

To this I would say: It's okay to end the session "early". I will literally tell my players "Hey guys, you blew through all my prep notes way faster than I thought. I have nothing prepared beyond this! Let's stop here for tonight and we'll pick it up next week right."
Once you've been playing for several months, then you'll be able to improvise more. Even then it's okay to just be honest with your players if you don't feel comfortable.

The entire point of why this bothers me is because it's information my character SHOULDN'T KNOW, or at least be given the chance to roll a knowledge check, if applicable, to see if my character knows it. Information about strange creatures, information about unfamiliar locales, etc, doesn't matter how long my character has lived in the setting, if he/she has never come across anything related to that stuff, then it's not free information that "you automatically know".

Bonus points because the DM threw the party into a setting where we all had amnesia and weren't even from the land we were in.

I mean that's fair, I've just had DMs that automatically jump to do it and don't give the players a chance to do it.