What are some DM shenanigans you pull on your players?

What are some DM shenanigans you pull on your players?

>make a huge description and detail about the host of a house pouring drinks
>"she grabs the kettle and lightly pours in in to black clay cups. she reaches for a small jar and adds a yellowish gelatin to the cups and mixes the drinks swiftly. she then reaches for one of the plants inside the house, tears off a piece of a leaf, and adds it on top of the drinks. she hands each of you cups and motions for you to drink."
>nobody in the room fucking dares to drink honey herbal tea

>the bar is loud and noisy. the people are dancing, drinking, and smoking in joy with loud raucous music being played by the elves
>roll perception
>players are looking at each other like they're about to be assassinated or mugged
>some of them roll low
>a barmaid manages to sneak up on you and she swiftly takes a seat next to you. her race is slightly red, and she talks in a bit of slur. "Who might you be strangers!?"
>players looking at each other awkwardly. "W-We're doing fine..."
>also I make sure to count my coins and hide my purse inside my shirt

>you're walking across the street as evening comes and everything seems ordinary. you see shops closing, children heading home, and from a block away you can see the light of an inn. three Orcs outside are talking among themselves
>I specified on the very start of my campaign that Orcs are not evil and they are similar to Elder Scrolls/Skyrim Orcs
>"...we head to the inn and we keep a close watch on the Orcs. we do a Stealth check if possible and have our arms readied on our weapons."

You've a private circle in hell.

Two first are fine, last one is silly. Remind them that orcs are not strictly lawless.

>Remove the spell "Identify" (and a bunch of other spells that flatout replace skill checks) from the game.
>Tell players they can still identify the properties of magical items with the Arcana and a little research
>Literally put a wizard NPC in the starting city who can perform the service for a small fee as well
>Players suddenly think every magic item they come across is cursed and are afraid to use them, despite me giving them alternative ways to check this.
>"Identify" RAW never identified cursed items anyway.

>Always give players a "home base" to upgrade over time, whether it's a guild hall or warehouse or tavern or whatever.
>Allow the players to hire NPCs who provide services and items at a reduced rate.
>Players always hire a ton of them just to have them.
>Players never actually buy items or services from them and instead pay full-price at other shops
>There's always that one smart player who does though.
>Everyone else bitches about how he has more money than the rest of the party.

>Make Enchanting magic illegal in most civilized areas because it's literally magic that influences someone's mind and takes away their agency.
>The sorcerer with 18 charisma and proficiency in persuasion still goes around trying to use charm person.
>"What's the big deal?! It's not like I'm not practicing necromancy or summoning demons!"

>I've suddenly decided in my description that none of your characters know what honey is, possibly also mint. Because fuck you.
It's not like the characters have all lived in this world for fucking years, do you also obfuscate the very ground they walk on?
>Hey I made people roll perception for no reason, despite there being no meaningful chance of failure, against the advice of literally every rulebook published in recent memory.
Yeah that will sure fool them.
>I've got nothing against the last one other than you bringing specific attention to more things that do not matter, of course people are going to focus on the thing the world itself gave them tunnel vision on.
Cunt.

I wouldn't play with you because you think you're actually clever/10

Last time, our GM had our group wander in a bad part of town at a very late hour in the night after we were done looking for a plot-relevant NPC

>As you go through the middle of the place, you come across a completely white house, one story tall, with no windows and impressive marble columns at the sides of the big front door. There are no windows coming from it. What do you do?
One of our group decided to investigate this and knocked on the door.
>The door opens without a sound and from the second floor windows you can now see light comibg out. What do you do.
He went in, still thinking about investigating.
>the door slams closed behind you. Roll a new character.

If I had not been playing Warhammer Fantasy RP with the three of them for a few weeks prior, I would have called bull, but as we all know Warhammer is unforgiving, so I was not surprised at this very casual death-sentence.

Pic related was the house btw.

How were they seeing light coming out of second floor windows on a one story building?

Yes.

Oh, I forgot to mention that the interior of the house was pitch black- the PC that went in didn't even turn on a candle or a torch. And the rest of the group was noping as hard as they could, recognizing the typical horror setup.

The GM explained OoC that we don't know what it was since the rest of the party stomped off without giving the house a second look. So it is most probably warp fuckery- anyhow, for me the moral of the story is that you shouldn't play overly curious characters unless you're planning on rerolling and that not everything is there to move the plot forwars. We're in a maze trying to get out and sometimes there are walls in the way. Other times, gigantic pitfalls of certain death. The light out the second story window was supposed to be setting off alarm bells in the player's head that something is not right and go away.

I once had my players get ganked by some bandits in their travels.
Two of the four bandits was orcs
Later the party is walking along the road when 3 massive orcs are walking towards them from down the road.
I'm very specific in that the orcs are just being peaceful and keeping their weapons on their backs.
Players start to draw weapons as they get closer.
Make sure to tell them the orcs arnt being aggressive in anyway. (Was planning to have the orcs talking about the next plot area)
We where using a new crit system. Roll a D30 die and use a chart to see results. (That system got cut after 2 rolls. This is one of the rolls).
They attack the orcs out of nowhere as I begin to describe the orc conversation.
MFW one of my peaceful orcs looses his arm.

You have to add the occasional die roll so they don't "know" the results of a roll even when they fail.
>I roll to trap check the door.
You don't have to it's not trapped.
>I roll to trap check this different door.
Go ahead, you rolled a 3, you don't think it's trapped.

Now the player dose know it is trapped because I did make him roll.