What is the biggest tantrum you've ever seen a player throw? Have you ever seen someone react negatively to something that happened in-game?
General story-time thread. Gather around, folks. Listen and be astounded by stinky BO tales and social incompetence!
Also, please share any stories of general Autism and "That Guy-ism"
Had a bottle of Italian dressing thrown at me. I don't know where he got it from; we didn't have any at the house so the only explanation is that he brought a fucking bottle of Italian dressing with him in his backpack.
Why?
>college dorm room
>4 laptops on a tiny table
>first session
>GM is not horrible, keeps first two encounters engaging
>Samurai Jack stand-in player only pays attention after he hears it is his turn in combat
>literally a samurai character named Jack, unfortunately
>by fourth encounter GM is tired of his shit
>politely asks him to pay attention
>yeah bro I am
>GM closes Jack's laptop while he is zoned out on his phone
>headphone cable prevents full closure
>Jack screeches at him for destroying his screen despite a lack of damage
>frothily threatens to destroy GM's computer
>after a few failed attempts to calm him, slams GM's computer closed and storms off
>continue playing for 2 more awkward hours
It's a longer story than I care to type out right now man but here's a basic breakdown
Basic context: girlfriend's mother and stepfather want to go to a concert and bribe us to more or less babysit her younger brother for the weekend. He's 14 and is a good kid, but is 14. His friends are fairly decent too, except for his THAT GUY friend. He's also not a bad kid, he's just the epitome of THAT GUY. They get into D&D because of Stranger Things, but they are all clueless. Girlfriend bribes me further, says if I DM for them for just one session it'll be worth it. Fine, I'll jot some notes down and just make it up as I go. Can't be that hard, right?
>Most basic campaign I can think of, they meet in a tavern and get a quest from the bartender to find a lost caravan. Insert some bandits and a few orcs, kill them, find the goods, back to the bar, bada bing bada boom. Remember they're 14 and their only knowledge of D&D is strictly because of Stranger Things.
>Homebrew the SHIT out of everything to boil it down for them so that there's only 5 stats, feats etc are just MMO style abilities, and the only rolls were either 1d6 or 1d20. I arbitrarily make up the outcomes as we go. It works surprisingly well actually.
>THAT GUY has to immediately try and derail it by trying to kill the shop keep and everyone in the tavern. Group says no fuck you.
>Get to the caravan, oh no bandits! THAT GUY wants to rape the bandits. Group again says no fuck you.
>On the way back, oh no orcs! THAT GUY wants to rape the fucking orcs now. Group, once again, says no fuck you.
>Aside from these outbursts it's going well actually, they're really into it and I can see my girl giving me the "you're about to see GOD" look
Buh ok you got me going, continuing in next post
>Start actually getting kinda into this. Their characters are surprisingly decent. No mary sues, none of them are animu tier edgelords.
>Except for THAT GUY who is a vampire elf viking? Little bro says it's fine just go with it.
>Realize it's been like 3 hours and is almost 11pm. Alright kids back to the tavern, I'll drive the friends home while the lady cleans up. All in all a successful night...
>Until THAT GUY wants to keep going.
>Long winded puberty induced fight between 4 very awkward teenagers ensues. Just kinda sitting there making sure they don't spill anything and that none of the plates or glassware get knocked off the table.
>And then I feel an impact, and something wet running down the side of my head.
>On the floor is a bottle of Italian dressing.
>THAT GUY sperged out so hard that he produced and then threw with all of his might a half empty bottle of Italian dressing with the intention of hitting little bro with it, but missed by a mile and hit me at point blank.
>Just keep repeating to myself that I was a teenager once, I did dumb shit too. Be the good example for the next generation. Don't do something to screw this up when you're about to get rocked, up until now this was a pretty fun night.
>Just quietly stand up, get a few paper towels, wipe myself off, then grab the kid's collar and basically drag him to the front door.
>Turn around and just look at little bro and his friends, nod in the direction.
>Completely silent car ride with four teenagers and bits of dried onion in my hair.
>Silent ride back.
>Little bro is about to apologize profusely, just quietly tell him to not worry about it. We were all emotional and had stupid outbursts when we were that age, the kid is probably very embarrassed too. Try not to give him too much shit about on Monday at school. Quick fist bump and then head upstairs.
>Girlfriend immediately starts laughing at the top of her lungs as she picks out more little bits of Italian dressing out of my hair
And that's basically it. Did end up DMing for them for a few more sessions until they decided they did not need training wheels anymore. Got little bro a few rule books and some starter kits for his birthday and they've been really into it for about a year now. THAT GUY did end up apologizing and has actually come around to be pretty tolerable, if not still eccentric.
I still don't know where the bottle came from though.
The worst ever temper tantrum I got was over 3.5 stupiddle. The guy who did it was normally pretty quiet too. I wouldn't call him a good player, but I didn't associate him with hardcore That Guying; he was the sort that was quiet, only really spoke if he had a tactical recommendation, and seemed to think the game was solely about killing things, getting XP, and better gear so they could kill more and bigger things.
>But playing a rather mundane, stupid adventure.
>Players defeat the monsters, huzzah.
>Wasn't planning on using the locations again or anything, was just a short adventure, so as I usually did, now that it was too late for them to do anything about it, I let the players look at some of my notes, see the things that they did right and wrong.
>And then this guy sees this one random fluff character I scribbled, that they barely interacted with in the game.
>He was a guy at the royal court, who was a !not Kasparov at a !not chess like boardgame.
>His entire entry was a name, his age of 42, a note that he was a level 1 commoner with 10 in every stat, and a +35 at playing this board game. That's it.
>Goes red in the face, starts jumping up and down and pounded the LGS table so hard that he cracked it in one place about how it's FUCKING BULLSHIT! and that I'M A FILTHY FUCKING CHEATER!
>Because apparently deciding not to build a throwaway NPC along the same lines that a PC is made is some kind of heresy.
He apologized afterwards for it, which I suspect had more to do with the game store manager insisting for him to be allowed back than any actual remorse, but I haven't let him in my games again. Still see him around every so often.
>Running Pathfinder for a group of people I know from another forum
>That Guy is playing a minmaxed Zen Archer
>Gets six attacks per round while other party members have one or two, always full attacks because he's attacking from range and has a feat that lets him ignore cover
>Also has an ability called Perfect Strike, which he uses to roll all his attacks twice and take the higher result
>Because of this he never misses and gets very frequent crits
>He's destroying every encounter before the enemies or other players get to do anything
>Doesn't do anything outside combat, gets mad when other players try to roleplay
>Constantly seeking higher numbers, pressured the wizard into making boots of speed for him before even making his own equipment
>Blew up and almost ragequit when he tried to talk a new player out of making a damage character and I told him he doesn't have to be the only one doing damage
>Eventually I get tired of him ruining every encounter, tell him I'm banning Zen Archers and he can rebuild his character as a different class
>He throws a huge shitfit, starts a thread on the forum revealing our private messages, talking about how I'm such a shitty GM and calling me a psychopath for not letting him have his way in a game of make believe
>Still hates me almost a year later
Later I found out that Perfect Strike is only supposed to apply to one attack per round, he was using all of them. When I called him out on cheating, he said it was my fault for not catching him.
You got a good tale out of it and they all seemed to turn out pretty good, so good end!
Thanks for the silly tale!