Mushroom People

Does it bother anyone else that “mushroomfolk” such as myconids are literal walking talking fungus cocks?

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Does it bother you that allergies are basically you being a bitch who can't handle a plants comeshot?

>implying I have weak genetics and allergies
Sucks to be you

Not at all. It confirms them as the manliest of races.
Talk shit about fungus again and you will end up covered in mushroom bruises, not just around your mouth like usual.

Actually, they aren't dicks. Because their spores become new colonies of fungi. So it's not like plant pollen or sperm. Which is only half of the genetic code that must combine itself with the female half in order to create a new living entity.

I'm not sure if that makes them futa/dickgirls/whatever the fuck /d/ calls them or not. Not even entirely certain if it's asexual reproduction or not, either. How the hell do fungi swap genetic codes, anyways?

No more than it bothers me that the fruits I'm munching on are plant foetuses ripped from their mothers' umbilical cords.

So no, not at all.

To be pedantic, seeds, not fruit, are the plant equivalent of foetuses. We eat some seeds too-- grains-- but the fleshy parts of fruit are more like amniotic fluid.

So we're ripping out the entire plant womb, with its tiny little foetus at the center, along with the amniotic fluid, and stuffing our mouths with it.

That's much better, thanks.

Actually, I should correct myself a little on that-- most fruit are SUPPOSED to be eaten so that the eater will carry the seeds and drop them further away from the parent plant. Fruit are baby carriages.

I thought fruit was supposed to fall on the ground and rot, creating nice soil conditions for the seed to germinate?

Hmm, that might be true in some cases, but with trees at least it would get a little crowded. Generally plants that don't want their fruit eaten are poisonous, though. And, well, the "nice soil conditions" and "fruit gets eaten" methods are not mutually exclusive, given that the latter tends to work by having the animal swallow the seeds whole...

>I thought fruit was supposed to fall on the ground and rot, creating nice soil conditions for the seed to germinate?
Depends on the ecosystem.

Depends on the fruit. However, the ones that are sweet and fleshy and contain lots of sugars are that way specifically to attract the attention of animals that will eat them. Many seeds are designed to pass through a bird's digestive system unharmed so when the bird takes a shit it'll disperse the plant's seeds. Others, like coconuts, aren't usually meant to be eaten but are instead flotation devices so that the water will carry them far away to a potentially good sprouting location. At least one species has fruits that fucking explode to fling their seeds away. Some also do the rot thing.

Shit's bananas.

>Does it bother anyone else that “mushroomfolk” such as myconids are literal walking talking fungus cocks?

No they are not, you are dumb, you don’t even understand highschool biology, KYS dipshit.

A quick search later:

independent.co.uk/news/scientists-discover-why-fungi-have-36000-sexes-1119181.html

Actually, allergies arn't so much that you body can't handle it than that your body way overreacts to just a little bit of tree cum in your mouth.

>Shit's bananas
We clone those now, haven't you heard?

That's why they don't have seeds.

I figure that with magical settings comes a minimum of residual exhaust from casting that slowly creates some sentience in certain things.

Myconids being one such result of this but how sentient or sapient they become depends on the amount of time each being has had to grow in complexity.
Adventurers probably spear and cook little mushroom folk warring along the road between towns

>36000 sexes
kinky

>36000 sexes
>THIRTY-SIX THOUSAND SEXES

So fungi are like tumblrites but with actual biological stuff instead of '72 genders'?

Huh.