Adventure Call

You're watching...Adventure Call.
My name...is Falconhewf and I will be your guide on your quest.
Greetings line 6, what is your name Traveler?

Muh name's Tom.

get troll

kill jester

here you

Greetin's Tom, are you ready to play?

>You find yourself in what seems to be a rape dungeon.
>There is an exit to the North
>Beside you is a black dildo.
What will you do?

swallow dildo whole

Jump the chasm.

You...swallow the dildo whole. And choke to death.
Game Over.
Let's take another call!

I never could watch this. I just feel bad for the guy that doesn't exist.

Hullow Falwkenhooth.

Go whence I came

Edmund Shallowbacker

You've got a call from

Gies a go, ya cunt.

Git fucked ya jessie.

yer ma's git balls an yer da loves it

I'm thirsty. Can you recommend a good drink?

IRN BRU.

Get ye flask

We've got two callers.

Yeh boff are stuck inside a dundjon. Boff of yeh have a key but it dosn't work on your awn lock.

gnaw off my own arm/leg to escape.

Awm keepin' mah key. Tha' ovver cuhnt ehnt gettin mah prize munny.

Don't you have a CYOA to be shitposting in?

Yuh are heavily bleed'in
Buff you have to escape!

You'll be after the refreshing taste of barry's red cola.

OPEN SARCOPHAGUS!

Ee's gonna bleed out soon. Ah'll have his key.

Uh.... rape the dungeon.