That Guys

I've stayed in bad games before because the group was made up of friends and it was one of the few times we had free to all hang out.
Thankfully now that we're older we've come to accept that some of us should just never GM ever again.

>That guys don't exist
Wherever you live, user, stay there, it seems like an utopia. Enjoy your time with nice people for us.

>Free
Hey, we're cunts but we follow the rules. It costs 5k GPs to resurrect and 2k GPs to remove the negative levels. GM is probably realizing we don't care wasting our gold because we don't intend on make this game end well (till last session he was quite happy though that we blew up 7k on raise deads because it meant less magic items/gold for us)...or probably not, crossing fingers, next session is going to be a mess.

>grimdark
>showering the PCs in thousands and thousands of GP so they can pay for repeated resurrections

You've never been stockholmed before. Tabletop is a social situation that pulls this shit off all the time. You know it's bad, but you've been doing it for so long, this is the only thing you know how to do to socialize. Humans are creatures of habit. I've seen this shit for years.

They're probably high level and playing D&D where everything you find at high level is worth fuckloads. You can be grimdark and still follow the standard rules for the system.

You are either too naive for this world or had the best life experience so far. Whichever it is, know that you are wrong in your assertion.

I was That Guy in the past.

>GM has the group meet with some nobs after an assignment the party had
>at dinner, conversation happens, my character is enjoying the food and drinks
>talky guy is talking with the most talkative nobs
>I am engaged in convo by another nob who asks how's the food and drinks
>if I am enjoying myself and stuff
>sure, I tell him the food is good and I like it
>GM has me roll to talk to this guy without making a complete fool of myself
>fair, since my character isn't used to talk to courtiers and whatnot
>I manage to address the guy in a good fashion and conversation proceeds smoothly
>GM rolls some more dice
>says that as I tell him how things went, this guy seems trustworthy and my PC enjoys talking to him
>what. the. fuck?
>I ask "he seems trustworthy? Trustworthy how? does he have a trustworthy face? Does he speak calmly and have a serene attitude? Trustworthy how?"
>GM goes radio silent
>wait for twenty or so seconds, feels like half an hour
>"well? Why do I like him?"
>nothing

Felt like that GoodFellas moment. youtube.com/watch?v=C5QAHzu_kAc In the end I decided to stop talking to the guy and never address him again because I hated him.

>I suppose most threads of this nature would be markedly short and full of the same trite stories, month after month.
Oh ye of little faith

Sorry, but you are the prime example of an user that either doesn't play enough RPGs or just play with the same group of friends and thinks that's how everyone else plays. Out there in the wild savannah of retardation that is the world, you will find the stupidest most rock-bottom bullshit stuff that ever graced the earth. If a turd cleric is "shit that didn't happen" tier for you, then I pray you and your group never split.

Many people in this hobby develop or enter with the mentality of "I can do LITERALLY anything!" and will push the boundaries of good taste and sanity to the absolute limit. Turd cleric sounds totaly feasable in front of the showcase of brainfarts that I've seen both IRL and in the grand gala of madness that is the roll20 LFG.

I've had people submit straight up war criminals in a light-hearted teen investigation game, rapist cannibals that build flesh shrines from dead enemies in Dark Heresy games, Orc Barbarians in a VtM game, shit goes on. To be perfectly honest, I'd wish I could be as pure as you and not believe that these flaming trashcans exist.

Here, have a cool old guy.

Are you having fun?

Just leave and have someone else GM

>grimdark
>high level DnD

Have you thought of -maybe- finding another GM?

I don't think so. But then again, I'm not the guy you're addressing.

Why do people think telling a player "that isn't an appropriate character for this campaign" isn't an option?

A friend decided to run a D&D campaign for us. A guy called Ben decided to join too. Unfortunately, our GM hates Ben. Our GM, in a fit of genius, had decided to keep this secret from everybody. He decided he wouldn't simply ask Ben not to play; no, that would be too confrontational. Instead, he offered to make his character for him, then gave him the exact worst stats possible and refused to change them (it would "take too long"; none of us knew any better). Ben decided he didn't want to play.

In our very first session, the GM got into a bout of graphic ERP with his BFF. The rest of us watched on, awkwardly.

Because then they whine and throw a bitchfit at session zero, probably torpedoing the entire campaign before it even starts. If you wait, you hope that either the character won't be as awful as it initially sounds, or that by then the adventure arc is strong enough on its own that it can survive a disruptive loss of a player.

>Because then they whine and throw a bitchfit at session zero
Find better players

This!

If I could do that, I wouldn't have to worry about literal shit-clerics to begin with. I work with the tools I have.

well, if you're working with the tools you have, better start getting used to driving screws with a butter knife and hammering in nails with your pliers.

Had a player who would make sexual noises every time he took damage, and the closer he got to 0 HP, the louder and longer they got. When it finally came to a death saving throw, he took his penis out, looked me right in the eye, and started stroking it. Two players had run out of the room before I realized it was a fake penis. One of them refused to come back anyway.

Not That guy

Don't know if freeform RPs are allowed, but here goes.

>Playing Akame Ga Kill RP online
>Most of the people seem pretty chill
>Got a few edgy characters but nothing crazy.
>Except for this one girl
>Named TheDiplomat, all her characters are STRONG FEMALE CHARACTERS WHO DONT NEED NO MAN
>She also created an entire country for them
>Gallia is a monarchy, no taxes, no poverty, strongest military in the world, more technologically than the Empire
>She never explains how all of this is possible
>GM is really new at GMing and lets it all pass
>Diplomat's characters all ride around on Jeeps, in a setting where horse drawn carriages are the norm
>They also apparently have squads of soldiers at their beck and call, which they frequently use
>They make a wooden mockup of a tank using a motorcycle, and blow up the base of the Imperial loyalists.
>Pretty much nobody sees a problem with this except for me and one other guy.
>Diplomat eventually becomes a moderator
>Bans a new girl when she asks how Diplomat's characters managed to bring tanks in across the entire Empire in under a day
>For clarification, the capitol of the Empire alone is as large as a country
>Later turns out that TheDiplomat has multiple people using the account, gets moderator status removed.
>Every time she tries to bring in more OP shit, the other cool guy and I oppose her and point out why it's bullshit.
>At one point she tries to have her country invent the Nuke, we manage to put a stop to that pretty fast

>RP continues on, eventually the Prime Minister is killed and the Empire can finally be rid of its corruption
>TheDiplomat reveals that the head of Finances is actually a Gallian spy, placed there fifteen years ago
>Naturally she's a STRONG INDEPENDENT FEMALE CHARACTER
>Somehow didn't get raped by the Prime Minister or the other corrupt politicians
>Entire government and military is full of Gallian spies.
>I become a moderator, take control of the Northern Lands as the new enemy of the Empire
>Northern Lands are conveniently a tribe based society, no chance of Gallia placing spies there
>Diplomat demands to have submarines for the sole purpose of spying on the North.

By that point the RP died, everyone was tired of dealing with her shit. A real shame too, it was actually pretty fun.

>D&D
>we're in an army, technically fighting for the "wrong side"
>we lead the enemy army away from their planned assault
>the fighter-sorc has been doing a great job setting up ambushes and traps and shit for the enemy army
>we whittle them down from 2k troops to about 200
>to be fair the ones we killed off were all farmer conscripts, and the 200 left were professional knights
>I have the idea to lead some of the knights into a barn that I've doused with lamp oil
>I have to roll an engineering check to see if I can figure out which joins in the barn to set ablaze.
>fighter-sorc perks up
>...you can do that?
>what?
>roll engineering checks?
>...uhhh, yeah.
>fine, I roll to see if I can come up with an internal combustion engine.
>everyone laughs.
>no, I'm serious. I want a jeep.
>the DM shakes his head. "You're not going to invent a jeep. Let's rein it in."
>No, I want a fucking jeep.
>You're in the middle of a war, in an abandoned farmstead. You don't have the time, materials, or skills to invent a jeep, let alone assemble one by hand. Come on, man.
>I want a jeep and you're not being fair. I should at least be able to roll.
>buddy across the table is all, "lol give him a DC of 200."
>fighter-sorc stomps out of the DM's house and doesn't rejoin the party.

that was .... seventeen years ago. Still don't understand it. He was a perfectly fine player up until the point when we told him he couldn't just spontaneously engineer a jeep out of thin air.

I'm sorry to have to return that "Sorry," but while that was true for over a decade of my time in the hobby, the other eleven years I've spent playing RPGs has primarily been online. Ignoring those first ten years, I've played with nearly a hundred and twenty people this year alone.

Trolls will be trolls, and people with eccentric personalities and underdeveloped imaginations are one thing, but people are still people, even the crazies. And though the ever odd and truly "special case" does come up from time to time, even they can be dealt with and set aside with words alone.

I'm not saying that "That Guy" doesn't exist — though it rarely does in the context of these threads — but I simply must reiterate: That. Shit. Did. Not. Happen. End of story; pun intended.

>That. Shit. Did. Not. Happen.
You. Can't. Just. Declare. That. On. Gut. Instinct.

Pun also intended.

>flashbacks to jeepfag taking over that thread

Autism is one hell of a drug.

Not that guy but some of the stories like the fake penis one are too absurd to be true

Not even gonna defend that one. The only way I'd believe it would be actual video evidence.

But I'm still standing by the opinion that turd cleric is something I could definately see someone try to pull off and not get the hint that the collective groans around the table mean "stop this shit already."

See, I don't understand you people. If the setting is something that's grimdark, you should embrace it. In a grimdark setting, instead of banging my head against the wall, I take the chance to make concepts I wouldn't normally explore - Inquisitor, torturer, witch-hunter, blood-soaked slayer of heretics, fanatic, scumbag mercenary and war criminal. (i.e. Glokta, Caine, Ninefingers without the teamkilling, Guts.)

It's more fun if you go "Okay, this is how the world is. I'm jumping it with both feet, and investing myself into the setting wholeheartedly" instead of being the one guy who wants to fight the setting.

It's like if it's a game about knights. I'm not going to play someone who wants to end feudalism, I'm going to play someone who LOVES feudalism! As a PC, I would actively resist attempts to fix it: That would spoil the fun!

>GM forcing grimderpness
>Tell GM we're not having fun and this is getting really stupid
>GM fucking loses it and starts freaking out
>Decides he's going to "prove us wrong" by adding a bunch of retarded shit and being "lel so randumb"
>He's literally so straightlaced and attached to grimderpness he's actually still playing a relatively serious game
>its actually fun now

I like to think it was somehow that very fighter-sorc.

>fake penis one
>absurd
Now, if it had been a real penis, sure, there's no way that would have happened.

First rule of improv is never say no, the DM was That Guy.

>improv
You are That Guy to end all That Guys

Sounds like your group went from Dark Heresy to Gamma World.

DMs can say no. They're allowed to. You're just supposed to avoid it as often as possible. If someone says they want to jump to the moon, the answer is no, or "Not right now, but maybe if you invest enough to figuring it out over time."

Ah yes, the Shit Cleric. Distant cousin of the Whizzard.

>I want to magically 1 shot everything!
>okay how?
>With my katana!
>no. you don't have the required skill, intelligence, or strategy to make it work.

This is the correct question.

>Akame Ga Kill freeform
>few edgy characters but nothing crazy
That's considerably better than canon, so color me impressed.

Eh, flow and pushback is an art. If you go along with the setting completely, there's nothing to say because the character and world are the same thing. If you go against the setting completely, you get incoherent contrarianism. Finding the right spot of middle ground requires knowing where going along makes things better and where standing out makes things better, and as always that's going to be largely a matter of taste.

Have you met people before?

>boot her for this shitty character

I was giggling until this line then burst out in laughter.

The pun was intentional.

That doesn't make me any less amused.

That is a horrible metric for disregarding something because absurd shit happens all the time.

As a GM. That sounded like an on the fly thing and he/she couldn't muster some BS for you.

>t. Fighter-sorc with a jeep fetish

>Not "Clershit"

There's at least one fantastic thread on Veeky Forums right now involving insane historical shenanigans. That's not to say the penis thing definitely happened, but if this shit can happen to an entire country a rubber penis isn't out of the question.

>engineer plays an alchemist
>goes out and buys a bunch of randoms tuff
>then "accidentally" combines everything in just the exact amounts needed to invent gunpowder
>within 5 seconds of discovering this black powder, comes to the conclusion it's explosive. Has no in-character reason for believing this.
>Decides the best way to use it would be "a small metal cylinder that uses the powder to explode and launch tiny metal pelts at people." Again, has no in-character reason to believe why any of this is a good idea, or would even work
>has an autism fit and stomps out because I won't let him have guns with a justification that weak in a medieval fantasy game

You sound like a passive aggressive cunt

To be fair, its not like gunpowder is a revolutionary idea.
The problem isn't making an explosive that shoots stuff. Its making bullets and a gun that can shoot it reliably.
1700 rifles were shit, bows were often still better if you knew how to use them.
you should have given him a gun but given it a huge accuracy penalty and slow reload time making it effectively useless. also cause it to jam and misfire constantly.

You did nothing wrong; it is a weird thing to say. You control your character, so the GM shouldn't be making opinion judgements for them.

I've admittedly done this before as a GM. When the players call me out, though, I learnt that it was a better idea to just backtrack, say that was the wrong word to use, and come up with something else. Better admit you're wrong than continue floundering and annoying/confusing the players, after all.

I would have been willing to throw him a bone, but like I said, he didn't even make an attempt to justify why his character would be doing this, it was entirely a metagame thing.

>That Guys
Shouldn't the plural of 'That Guy' be Those Guys?

>inb4 I'm called That Guy

Well he is an alchemist.
I still think its best to just deal with this in the most obvious way and just tell him sure, but that's not how guns work you dumbass, nice job blowing off your fingers because medieval pipes weren't the most structurally sound things in the world..

This just fucked me up.
We've been calling them "That Guys" for years now.

...

No user, you're a Those Guy.

If That Guy is a title/name then having multiple "That Guys" makes sense doesn't it?

This post was a mistake.

Huh. Maybe I should visit Veeky Forums more often.

>If you go along with the setting completely, there's nothing to say because the character and world are the same thing.

What the fuck does that mean? I've never seen a character who fit well into the tone of a setting and dismissed him "pfft you're just setting stuffing": if they look like that they're a poorly written character whether they're going with or against the grain, and that bit's got nothing to do with it. What's wrong with being a part of the setting? Why is a middle ground preferable, and what even is that?

None of that user's character ideas sound like they'd be unexpected in a grimdark setting, nor do they sound like they'd just kind of "be" the setting: they all have a role in it, but the interesting part is the character filling the role and their struggles.

What even is a middle of the road character to you? To me it seems like one that only half assedly goes against the tone of the world and half assedly gives in. That sounds like it's destined to be a wishy washy brooding fest no matter the world, but maybe it could be done okay. The only motivation I can find easily for this middle bullshit is the "I'm above it" nonsense.

>Well he is an alchemist.
All the more reason for him to be thinking of chemical uses and not explosive propulsion. I admire your desire to skip to the end result of "No.", but I do think there's a whole field of 'what the shit' that's fair game in between.

Of course, we both know he'd have thrown a shitfit about that and begun randomly forging better pipes, so I doubt it mattered much.

>What the fuck does that mean?
It means you have to stand out in some way to be interesting. That's sort of what interesting means.

>if they look like that they're a poorly written character whether they're going with or against the grain, and that bit's got nothing to do with it
On the contrary, they're shitty in entirely different ways. Generic Knight #12 is functional but bland; his motivation is redundant with the setting, his backstory is redundant with the setting, his build is redundant with the setting. Super Snowflake Doki Doki Rainbow Freedom is incoherent but spectacular; her motivation has nothing to do with the setting, her backstory has nothing to do with the setting, her build has nothing to do with the setting. It's like the difference between text that's too close to the background color to read and text that's so garish you don't want to.

The middle ground is just finding a good-looking color for your text: Making sure they've got something interesting about them, something that sets them apart from the rabble, while still feeling like they're from the same world. Maybe the generic knight doesn't like his liege that much. Does that fit well with the setting? Do knights often dislike their lieges? If so, that detail isn't telling us anything. If not, he's now going against the setting in a way that's interesting. Fitting Snowflake in follows the opposite path. Are there witches in this setting? Battlemage academies? Sage guilds? Actor troupes? If not, that detail is stupid. If so, she's now going with the setting in a way that's interesting.

I had a character I used for one-shots that made me That Guy in some games, but almost the savior of other disasters.

I was new to tabletop games and just playing these in a random board where some people would come and go hosting or playing in random games using a simple post rolling d10 system.

My go-to for most games was a brawler sailor who was impatient, practical, and indifferent to drama. Sometimes you would get odd players and GMs and this character was the perfect foil to them.

>a player is too into their own character and within the first seconds of the game finds the nearest NPC to engage in conversation for the sole purpose of unloading their overly elaborate backstory
>other players are new or just awkward in new groups of strangers, or unused to a text based game as opposed to irl, so they don't know what to do, how to go about moving around or advancing.
>a GM might be in love with his own characters or stories too, or unable to herd or direct problems characters to advance.
>my solution was to move past all the bullshit.
>the game isn't moving forward so I move forward.
>things slow the game down too much so I knock them away
>slow or drama queen players need to keep up because I'm moving on with or without them.
>the gm's attempts at being deep or forcing terrible mary-sues on us are ignored, broken, and in some cases killed where they stood.

In some cases I was just being an asshole with overly heavy dislike for RP, in others it was justified and made for more interesting games.

>One time while all the other players where fucking about trying too hard to badly rp, I started a bar fight, started a fire, and ended the game by flying down a dragon's throat. While not much happened with the other characters.

>in another game I charged the monster guarding the door to the dungeon while everyone debated whether we should even try fighting it.

Yes.

Yes.
If you are a sleazy corporate jerk who's going to bulldoze an orphanage for a torture chamber, it doesn't change the fact that muggers killing him for pocket change is still wrong.

No, because the name is "That Guy" not that "Guy"

So its a proper noun.

In this scenario, "wrong" is a useless concept. The right question is what the right thing to do with this person is, which depends on the severity of their wrong actions, but should probably involve either rehabilitation to keep them from doing the wrong thing again, or indefinite confinement or execution to prevent them from being able to do further harm to society.

STEM THE FUCKING TIDE!

This, this I choose to believe.

Problem here is you're a faggot and won't ever deem a viable justification "good enough" I could fill a room with savants, wizards engineers, alchemists and siege experts and you'd tell me that it's at least 500 years of world ending experimentation before we reach a proof of concept "powder explosion that pushes a ball through a tube" you didn't think to sperg out and hard deny guns so you went and soft denied them with impossible to progress condition's

Thank you for posting, none the less I will do my best to erase your post from memory.

My group's been playing Tomb of Annihilation and I'm almost sure one player is cheating
>guessed the exact location of the tomb and the shield guardian on the map
>guessed exactly which houses had the cubes
>solves every puzzle incredibly fast or through great "intuition" sometimes in situations where guesswork would be incredibly unlikely
>EVERY wall he investigates has a secret passage, while the ones he ignores and others investigate are always empty
>always knows which traps have nothing to gain from triggering them and just ignores those areas and items
It's gotten to a point where I dont even try to solve puzzles anymore cause I know he'll just solve it in the minute it takes him to go look up the page. The worst part is no one else seems to suspect shit. I plan on talking to the DM but its not like theres concrete proof or anything.

>while everyone debated whether we should even try fighting it.

Good fucking god this is the worst. Sure check around for alternate entrances or try to diplomancer but if you find no other way run up and punch it in the dick. Not fighting will get us no where.

Of course it's wrong. That kinda guy is more likely to have credit cards than pocket change.

>you should embrace it.

>Me and a friend sign up for a game
>DM describes the game as mostly exploration and building a guild
>Players can really do whatever the fuck they want because its a "west marches" game
>After a few games tries to force the party evil
>Grimderp shit everywhere
>Our plans tend to end in failure
>Missions become impossible because we rested a nigh because we were all critically low on HP
>"You wasted to much time!" after throwing us against CR encounters way above us and designed to counter us
>Has monsters follow us across the world to prevent us from resting in the wilderness
>DM gets visibly mad when we succeed on specific rolls he wanted us to fail
>Try to talk with the DM
>Use his own words against him and tell him this is not what we signed up for
>"Your a smart man, i have respect for your well reasoned argument, but unfortunately i don't think having you guys at the table can work any more. My playstyle as a DM is too conflicting for you."
>Get kicked out of the group

At this point, I pull out my Exalted 3e rulebook and give it a meaningful look.

found the alchemist's player

i'd privately tip off the DM and tell him to mix things up in some of the areas ahead
with any luck, the cheater will either get outraged and reveal himself, or try to play it off and play normally.

Hasn't metallurgy been one of the big obstacles in implementing new technologies like gunpowder and steam? I remember something about some greek fucks discovering steam could be used as a power source, but the metallurgy just wasn't there to make anything bigger or useful than toys that just kind of spun around and shit.

>You can be grimdark and still follow the standard rules for the system

>D&D
>Money equals unlimited respawns
>Over the top heroic characters
>Black and White morality system

>Grimdark

>jeepfag taking over that thread
Care to elaborate?

>>D&D
>>Money equals unlimited respawns
>>Over the top heroic characters
>>Black and White morality system
>>Grimdark
Actually you don't even need money, there're spells that by temporary sacrificing Con or Str you can cast spells with costs of thousands of golden pieces, you can literally be poor and still cast raise dead easily. You just have to wait a couple of days between each cast to recover your Con or Str.

>GM says we're going to play up to 4 mythic tier at the very least
>Ok, pick feat that lets me multiclass mythic paths and power that works when multiclassing, it's 1000000% useless at mythic level 1, but becomes good from 2+
>20 sessions I see we're still at mythic level 1
>Ask GM what's happened
>"Nah, I decided not to keep using those"
>What happens with the shit I picked and that is useless at 1st level? can I at least change it?
>"No, why would you? that's what you chose"
...

>7th-9th level
>High level
kay