Best primarch coming through

It's funny exchange, just true enough to resonate, but just absurd enough to be humorous.

People get all buttblasted about primarch rivalries and we have these godawful threads. Why can't we just laugh at all of them together user?

IRON WITHIN IRON WITHOUT

this isn't Vulkan nor Jaghatai

Leave Curze to me

Fun is counterproductive

*Teleports behind you*

*Breaks your back*

Nothing personal, kid.

I'm glad you like the title of it.

Pert is my favorite Primarch. Its nice to reach across the isle sometimes.

Leave Magnus to me

Nope. There is no way you can tell me that Dorn went into that as some sort of atonement bs. He got in over his head and because of his failure, Perty is now literally a daemon prince and immortal.

Leave guilliman, ferrus, perturabo, to me

Pure style.

Leave c̶h̶a̶o̶s̶, the l̶o̶y̶a̶l̶i̶s̶t̶s̶, ???, to me

*Dies*

Am I the only one who thinks Curze should have been played strictly for laughs, like the orcs? Just this ridiculous edgelord king of cringe who even his fellow chaos buds want nothing to do with.

...

I'm the only one here who gave my life trying to save dad so you guys can fuck off

>"dies"

>I'm the only one here who gave my life trying to save dad so you guys can fuck off
By gave your life do you mean got throttled so hard your sons still feel the pain 10k years later? If so great job. Also you didnt save Dad Dorn did because he didnt die like a bitch and was there to carry him to the Throne like the loyal doorstop he was.

>literally died for nothing, emps wanted him dead anyway

Think emperor was happy when he saw that he had less work to do?

>headless/cyberhead Ferrus soon

Hell the Emperor brought him back for a little bit in ghost form during the webway war.

Sanguinius had to fight a fucking bloodthirster before Horus and heroically made a chink in Horus's armor that propelled the emperor to victory.

Don't worry, that's all going to get retconned.

Was getting killed and replaced part of your plan?

Didn't Guilly daddy push his shit after he buttslapped Lorgar?

Leave Fenris to me.

God, that could be creepy as hell if done correctly.

Leave at least something for me to do once I finally wake up.

Guilliman ran away with his tail tucked between his legs.

He is literally space batman

Perturbed turd beat the shit out of Fulgrim though...

>noFluff explicitly states that the tide was slowly turning to the Fist's favor during that fight before Guilliman intervened

Wew. The eternal state of Iron Fags.

Don't tell me you don't laugh at those stubby little arms. Don't you dare fucking lie.

If it was turning in their favour then why did Guilliman need to intervene at all?

To prevent as many friendly casualties as they could?

Yeah i dont get it either. I have a huge fists and a huge iw force in 30k. Perty is ny fav primarch but i love dorn as well.

test

bit late for that though

Leave literally the ENTIRE Imperium to me

Horus did nothing wrong. He simply wanted a future for his brothers without fear of a madman killing them.

They don't get to want that. They don't get to want anything. They aren't people. They were lab experiments and creations of war. They were created for a purpose, and deviating from that purpose as catastrophically as half of them did needs to be met with complete annihilation.

>and heroically made a chink in Horus's armor that propelled the emperor to victory.
That was always bullshit. Emps killed him psychically not physically. Sang died like bitch.

Horus' armour was psyker proof even before he got a power boost though.

I'm sorry your plan was shit, Emps. Better luck next time. Maybe you shouldn't try to get half your military to turn against you with your greatest son at it's head.

Dorn Hate Thread? Dorn Hate Thread.

I'm just sorry that you care more about yourself and a select few close to you than the Empire as a whole you selfish moron. You'd think a being many centuries old and supposedly wise would have more objectivity than that.

Pls no bully Dorn.

I prefer this version

>Emps cares about the empire
>Becomes a massive asshole and pits his demigods leading legions of supersoldiers against each other
>Literally trillions die due to his hubris

Emps was shit.

>demigods
Only gods can make demigods user; and the big E....oh you're a Lorgar apologist aren't you? Opinion discarded.

You are right, the Emperor is no good. That's why he needed the help of four actual gods to get the primarchs made.

>YWN cook everyday for your space elf goddess waifu in your big magic pot
>YWN be galaxy wide recognized as the bestest dad there is (not like the other main dad was real competition though)
>YWN have a cute dad beer belly that your space elf goddess waifu finds cute

You sure fill me with despair about my condition Nurgle.

Nurgle is what Homer Simpson would look like as a dad.
>Dad Mortarion ruined the garden with his scythe again
>DOH!

>psyker
>the emperor
I mean, I like to shittalk the emperor too, but saying that "psyker-proof" is good against the emperor is kinda saying that an imperial eagle is a good ward against regular psykers.

Even before his corruption he had issues, like when he directly ordered a significant portion of the Raven Guard to death via full frontal assault at Gate 42 because he was pissy that Corax wasnt leading the legion like he did when he was in charge of them.

/thread

He did, and oh boy did Fulgrim deserve it.

Guilliman was all about backup plans. Sure, Dorn was turning the tide, but Guilliman was probably thinking "no fuck this I'm gonna be the fun police and drag my brother home".

>having an albino homebrewer for a Primarch
Iron Within, Iron With Stout

>4 gods
more like 4 SHITSHOWS
pic realeted is true power

He lost to Russ though...

Malak made canon WHEN?

Malal*
Fuck autocorrect

>my favorite primarchs are Dorn and Kurze
Life is suffering

You must be full of self loathing

You have been blessed by Zuvassin.

Great power will come to you, but only if you post “GLORY TO NECOHO” in this thread.

>not replacing Dorn's missing hand with one of Ferrus' iron ones

>Dorn fags
>Patting themselves on the back for killing one half of a Primarch
>Probably
wew lad.

t. Omegon

The madman

All according to keikaku

No one won that battle. Agnry room would've killed Russ before the wolves would've killed him. Both legions would've lost a primarch, Russ said as much I believe.

The whole battle was actually about mental illness.

Mental illness and the danger of prideful over confidence.

Maximum kek

>*decimates own legion

>Gotta call Dad and break his secret project.

Yes, but Russ would've done his duty.
And at the end of the day, that's all that matters.

Time to show all of you who the real best Primarch is and then dad will finally read my poems

>yfw fleeing from the Battle of Terra

Maybe should have at least put up sign.

>Psychic wards and protection around Emperor that Magnus could not break on his own
"Sure warp daemon, I'll trade you for power to break them"
I'm sure Magnus could get a message to Terra with his own power. Sending a letter works better then kicking in the front door.

Yeah but how would he even know that there is a door, big E was acting retarded by keeping secrets when he himself preached truth.

In not saying the guy is perfect, but we're talking about Magnus here. He's seen the dangers of the warp. Emperor wasn't exactly forthcoming about Chaos, and if he had even said "Look, the Warp is a necessary evil at the moment but I've got a solid plan to get rid of it" maybe shit would have turned out different.

All he had to was tell Horus what he was doing, but nooo.

But Magnus should have taken a moment to think "Maybe things are built like this for a reason" and not taken a sledgehammer to the whole thing. It's like driving your car into the emergency room lobby because you need to a doctor.

vulkan is the best brimarch

>most boring primarch
>most boring legion
>most boring color scheme
>literally dies and resurrects over and over again in anime tier plot device

No. One of the reasons the Heresy happens is Horus thinks the Emperor is keeping things from him and either Horus thinking "Fuck this, I can do better" or "Dad doesn't trust me and these weird things are telling me Dad is going to use us and toss us away. Instead of asking him, I'm just going to take over his Empire, guaranteeing he will now kill me for starting this shit in the first place." They've already shit all over it, I just skim the golden kernels our of the torrent of literary diaherra that is BL.

I mean when he appoint Horus as warmaster. It's not that hard.