Elven Culture and Biology Thread

This.

I'll take this opportunity to drop some more world-building stuff before falling asleep. More religion
>in general they don't worship humanized gods
>they worship the dawn, moreso than the sun, because the dawn comes first every morning
>they worship specific winds that they ascribe certain characteristics to
>the spirits of animals is also worshipped, both a benevolent and a harmful form
>like isles of trees arise their holy groves out of a grassy sea
>those holy groves are the center of worship of female power, which they think of as the primordial power that needs to be activated by the male principle
>marriage is a recreation of these believes
>this is also why they think that a man is more powerful the more wives he has
>only women are allowed to be priests in these groves
>only on certain days are non-priests allowed to enter the holy groves, intruders will be killed by the priests or the beasts that inhabit these woods

But why are Elven women such sluts? Can you explain that to me? It's difficult to find an Elven girl that hasn't at least taken one Orc cock or more.

>Despite the legends, Elves are neither immortal nor ludicrously long-lived.
>They live to around 150-170, but remain entirely youthful up until the final few months of their lives.

>57240400
You are a sad being.

Damn... no wonder the typical Elvish girl has tasted hundreds of Orc cocks by the time she's old.

Anyone who marries an Elvish woman is a literal cuckold. Imagine sharing the same hole that thousands of Orcs before you have used. Have fun with OIV (Orc-immuno Deficiency) cuck.

Here come the elf-haters, contributing nothing to the thread and being disgusting vile creatures.

Sure.

>All Elves were originally from the moon, they are a completely alien species that is often mistaken or misunderstood as 'fey' due to how strange or mystical they seem which is completely understandable, but completely false.

>You will most likely never see a 'true' High Elf. There are many Elves who claim to be High Elves due to the finery they wear, the length and point of their ears, or perhaps point to a height of greater than 5ft 10 proving their superior lineage, but this is all non sequitur. A 'true' High Elf is an Elf that's comes straight from the moon and is unmistakable: completely elongated due to low-gravity and high luxury, a 'true' high elf is well over 8ft tall with their necks alone typically being almost a foot in length, long fingers, long ears, possessing bio-luminescent that shames an ordinary Elves 'fairy fire'.

>All Elves possess iridescent crystal brains, even the most mundane Wood Elf possess a completely crystallized brain. Many scholars theoririze why, exactly, Elves have crystal brains: perhaps it allows them psychic powers or is the source of their seemingly natural magical talents? Either way, many morbid Wizards and Alchemists have made prized trophies of crystalline Elven brains, regardless of whether or not they truly are magical.

>Wood Elves are a direct by product of High (moon) Elves coming down to the world and essentially going native roughly 100,000 years ago. The quite visible differences were made possible by the fact that terrestrial Elves are not in fact immortal and typically only live into their early 200's and reach sexual maturity in their early 20's- making them quite susceptible to natural selection.

>Technically speaking, 'all' Elves not from the moon are basically Wood Elves, but certain cultures and ethnicities find the term 'Wood Elf' to be derogatory in nature, referencing the misconception that Elves live in primitive treehouses and are all vegans that worship nature.

Bit late in the thread for that.

Elves are inherently magical beings, tied to the life around them in a way few other intelligent beings are.

As a result, Elven vampires are far removed from the pale, immortal bloodsuckers humans become. But instead devolve into gangly, monstrous creatures that from a distance, appear almost entirely skeletal.
These abominations are usually short-lived, requiring a steady intake of flesh and blood to prolong their lives. As they continue to feed, their bones outpace their bodies in monstrous growth, resulting in a monster upwards of 8 to 10 feet tall, with a mutated skeleton rife with seemingly random spikes poking from underneath dead skin. A skin that hangs around the creatures frame like a morbig cloak, dragging along the ground and hanging from every feature.

Sounds similar to Elvish females, except they need a steady intake of Orcish cocks to prolong their lives.

There exists a duke of a minor territory who's squat, greasy, rumpled appearance was publically mocked by a travelling Elf.
Taking great personal insult he has spent much personal time and the funds of his estate on running a smear campaign against all Elves.

This is partially done due to the fact that An Orc fucks his wife every night and only lets the Duke watch if he spreafs rumours about the virility of Orc Kind.

Elvish cur! You will retract your crude, foul remarks against me at once! They are completely untrue and outrageous to suggest. After all, we know it is Elvish women who have a reputation in the land for being the finest lovers of Orc cock, not human women.

humans go into the woods and chop down trees to make plains.

elves go into the plains and plant trees to make woods.

Humans go into Orcish camps to slaughter Orcs.

Elves go into Orcish camps to suck off Orcs.

>Elves have a similar birthrate to humans although they tend to have less children on average baring the development of twins and tend to wait longer before having children
>Typical lifespan ranges from 250 to 300 years (humans average around 120 and dwarves being the longest lived at 400). Elven physiology is resilient against infirmity so even elderly elves are incredibly fit and able-bodied
>They do not sleep in the way humans do and rather their parts of their brains will go into a low power state where they tend to "day dream" and need as few as 5 hours of this period or rest to be fully rested.
>Elves are culturally diverse dependent upon region although most all elves have a belief they are descended from actual immortal elves
>Their physiology prevents cross breeding (most races cannot reproduce with each other as a matter of course barring extreme circumstances and artifical effort)

>orccuck being this much of a little bitch
(lol)

Elves like o-orc d-dick!
Haha! So epic! I'll get a page on 1d4chan for s-sure!

They are quick to recognize lewdness.

Dark Elves live much shorter lives than other Elves, but learn much quicker.
There is no shortage of Elven nobles of other breeds of elf who this bugs the shit out of it.

>Elves are quick to recognize lewdness
Having such a..."noble and complex" culture, Elves are a bit of an oddity when it comes to sexuality.
It is no scandalous thing to see Elves prancing naked through the woods, or lying with each other in the nude at plays or performances, these are seen more of expressions of beauty and confidence.
In the same breath however, seeing the low-cut top of a Human barmaids gown or the men whooping and calling to attractive women is met with gasps of shock or indignation.
Even amongst the sexually conservative cities and holds of Dwaeven kingdoms, seeing male dwarves flex or dwarven women boasting about their figure is seen as crude and vain.

Yet Elves have no problem sucking off Orcs. Why is that?

The main reason is that humans, and most other races, are grotesquely over-sexualized to Elves.

Male humans look like some sort of cro-magnon hybrid monster thing with a 12" unwashed schlong, barrel arms, a sloped brow. Constantly aroused, behaving inappropriately, humping furniture.

Female humans are like unwashed bimbos from the Vegas strip. Tits like watermelons, hips like they're wearing saddlebags, skin plastered in who knows what.

That's how they see you. That's why you disgust them.

I fucking love pretensious elves. Meaning that everything is done under a pretense. Violent violence is abhorrent to them, so fighting is called dancing (often accompanied by music), or done by another identity via mask, glamor, or physical change. Language is couched in metaphors to disguise ugliness of topics. This pretense is part of their being. An elf dying from a bleeding wound will describe how they discovered rubies, or that the roses and beautiful, before perishing gracefully like a movie star.

So why do Elves love sucking off Orcs then? Shouldn't Orcs be even more bestial and ugly than Humans?

Why do you want elves to be orc lovers so bad orc cock sucker user?

Because it's true, in virtually all media Elves have a love for Orc dicks, why is that?

Except they don't user, you just have a fetish for slim men sucking on burly man cock and you see the world through that lens. Maybe you should satisfy that craving for big burly cock and get it out of your system for a bit.

I actually like seeing Elvish women get plowed by Orc cocks more. But it's true that Elvish men are pretty effeminate and faggoty, and they are twinks that get plowed by Orcish dicks.

And how do you explain the huge amount of media showing Elves being raped or having sex with Orcs?

Japan. Ugly guy fucking pretty girl is a big thing there. Orcs and elves are just the fantasy version of that for nerds.

When you were a kid, user, did you want to be a firefighter or an astronaut or a doctor? Or even something odd, like a postman or a zookeeper or a hairstylist.

And now you've spent close to 8 hours complaining/shitposting about orc cock.

user, you need a hobby. Time to go for a walk.

The first time I ever saw anything sexual or got a boner, it was a hentai of Orcs raping Elvish women.

Now you know why I'm obsessed with this.

Then go to /d/ where you can satisfy that craving and leave the blue board alone. None of us here share you pathetic and shitty tastes.

Sure, I get off to it too but I don't obsess about it. My main thing is monsters and tentacles, but I'm not shoving how i want monsters and tentacles to breed captured women until their bellies are swollen and heavy with monstral children, into nearly every conversation.

>tfw people make the rule of half-elves are/should be infertile

>all because the looked up animal cross-breeds and base the rule off of fucking animals when elves are outright fucking fae-like beings or advanced mammalians like humans

Have you ever asked the question "How long do Elf menstruations last?"

What else would you expect from people whose level of knowledge about anything is barely remembered high school "education" and wikipedia articles.

...
Why do I love the sound of this?
user what wonders have you discovered?

High Elves and Wood Elves, even though they look similar, aren't related.
They originated on different sides of the world, their languages and cultures are completely different.
Their relationship is an ancient unsolved mystery.

Here's genetically engineered elf-slave-girls.

Pro tip: Jerk off before coming to Veeky Forums.

If you want me to leave you have to treat me nicely. Take back your comments regarding my taste, it's not nice.

We should unite, user, and share stories of Orc cocks and tentacle monster rape far and wide. Other anons will succumb to our fetishes and the entire board will be filled with our fetish.

This is my jerk-off material. I've literally been stroking my dick while I've been typing to you all. Sorry.

I love it too. Only the most beautiful of humans with have any respect from an elf.

The Elves of darker countenance hate every fibre of your being and are astonished you still live. Your language is shit on their tongues, to hear it is like a retard vomiting. You are revolting to them, but they're still elves so they're graceful and beautiful in their hate and disgust.

It just makes sense, really. It's like how bird people tend to think small brightly coloured humans are male and large drab humans are female.

Hi Patrick.

/d/ will serve you significantly better than Veeky Forums will. So will sadpanda but it's gone down in quality in regard to my fetishes, may serve you better.

>Elf-song

>Wraith Elves

>>They live to around 150-170, but remain entirely youthful up until the final few months of their lives.

Stealing this.

Have desert elves in return.

It really makes it all the sweeter when human champions rise and do the things the elves failed in.
Or to see human armies victorious, or even just some normal human one-upping an elf.

I love both sides of this coin, the pretentious "noble-race", and the rowdy "lesser-races"

I forgot the desert elves.

That's where I stole it from yes, good shit.

falsemachine.blogspot.ca/2014/03/black-glass.html?m=1

>You will never be flirted with and sexually harassed by Bird people who think the lightly-colored town-guard that you are is some shapely human female.

Feels bad my guy.

D-do you accept my fetishes as not being shit-tier, user?

user, I'm the last person to kinkshame. You do you, just do it in appropriate places that's all I ask.

Don't be so insecure. We're all anons here.

>/d/ will serve you significantly better than Veeky Forums will.

No it won't. /d/ is full of futa and traps and other useless shit. He just likes his orcs and elves. Let him be.

That seems to be a mistake made by a ''historian'' who wrongly translated the sentence:
'' Wood elves have a particular fondnes for roasted orc flesh. ''

As you can see if you remove the word ''roasted'' the sentence looses its proper meaning.

>all because the looked up animal cross-breeds and base the rule off of fucking animals when elves are outright fucking fae-like beings or advanced mammalians like humans

No, its not about realism or any other retarded assumption, its about preventing your setting from being populated by mongrels and mutts, most races are directly created by gods anyway, chances are they wouldnt like their chosen people being assimilated into a mess.

If you want to have "muh 5% elf, 10% orc" you are free to shit on your own setting.

Got some things

>Dying Race
Elf is a dying race, their god died, thus they have none to make them new souls. They have taken up necromancy powered manual reincarnation to save their race. They capture souls of dead elves, and put them into the pregnent mothers. No soul=still birth. It is the Weesham (name stolen from Deaths Gate) that handles souls, but he must abandon his Nature gifts, he is even despised by Nature because it dies around him.

>A culture of many ages
Though said that elves mature much slower, it have some truth to it but it is greatly overstated. Instead it is a matter of culture. Like humans, elves have to discover themselves to reach adulthood, for elves this is only some years later. Yet older elves still look down upon as if they were teenagers, and in a sense they still are, because elves posses an old soul, one that have lived before. Discovering who you where is another long journey that can only be started after finding out who you are first in this life. After learning your older lives, you have to adapt yourself in a new light. A reckless human sage might call this ‘the third elven adulthood, after normal and unintegrated knowledge of old self.’

>Sustained by Magic
Most elves only need a little fruit and a bowl of rainwater every day to obtain all the necessary sustenance. Those who aren't blessed with this gift usually leaves the elven society quickly because they can't survive on the low amount of food produced.
So they would need only preservers and pickers, not farmers.

>Half Elves
Radical Weesham catches non-elven souls for reincarnation. The non-elven soul cannot grant them as many elven gifts as a pure elven soul.

Feedback on my idea is always welcome.

>All Elves possess iridescent crystal brains, even the most mundane Wood Elf possess a completely crystallized brain.

Neat idea, how would you feel about crystal-like skeletons?, I feel like it would fit them too

Im stealing this

>Sustained by magic

I really like this one, especially because it explains why elven communities usually dont have rural areas and can afford to live in secluded areas without overhunting their game

Just don't show up to the squaredance. That'll really get them confused.

Elves have birthrates at the same level as humans and aren't really in danger of dying out because of it.

It's only that they have a ridicolous ''maturity ritual'' that lasts for a good 30 years of their lifespan.
Elves between the age of 20 and 70 are usually sent out by their community to explore the world and bring in a trophy of their hunt.
Due to elves having an exaggarated competitive desire this sparks of their desire to do better than the others and they usually target extremely dangerous creatures.
It's speculated that only 1 in 5 elves survives these ordeals.
Thanks to that however their stock keeps improving with each generation and only the fittest, smartest and most outstanding members of their race are having posterity.

>Neat idea, how would you feel about crystal-like skeletons?, I feel like it would fit them too

I've thought about it, but I'm happy with just their brains being made of crystal. I got the idea originally for it after doing an Alex Jones impression where I said, "The government is flourinating our water so they can crystallize our pineal glands and harvest them to use their latent psychic energy to power the Illuminati's secret FTL drives."

That said, I do have Elven Bones as an extremely powerful crafting material for magical wands and staffs if you're evil enough to do such a thing.

>fantasy anime
>has fantasy and fictional races such as elves, dwarves, fairies, orcs, dragons, etc.
>especially elves
>when elves are being shown and featured you only pretty much see female elves and very rarely do you see any male elves

Yeah I know it's not that much of a big deal especially with the topic of this elf thread. But since this is an elf thread I figured why the hell not?

And yeah, why in anime you rarely ever see male elves? As in male elves who're either part of main cast, major characters and or supporting characters. In fantasy anime the elves you'll often see are always bound to be some cutesy-quirky girl who's part of a harem.

What does Japan/Anime animators got against male elves?

>ywn see an anime character who is a tall, good looking, eternally youthful, beautiful/handsome, attractive but very powerful male high elf wizard named Caranthir Ar-Feiniel or Aldwin 'Glas Ulthran in a fantasy anime because japs are more obsessed with "cutie" elf women who act more like vapid valley girls
>you'll likely never see an elf guy in anime in general anytime sooner

>"The government is flourinating our water so they can crystallize our pineal glands and harvest them to use their latent psychic energy to power the Illuminati's secret FTL drives."

wat.png

>an Alex Jones impression
Are you sure you're not on his writing team?

I'd love to see a stream-of-conciousness conspiracy setting, but we'd never get it published. Drone strikes to knock out the power, then black-ops Serbian mercenaries to wipe the hard drives.

>Black Ops Serbian mercenaries

This is what he believes?

kako_da_ne.srb

Are Elves for raping?

I have absolutely no idea. I'm busy filling my brain with gin and obscure facts about 14th century erotica, not modern conspiracy theories.

Wouldn't be surprised though. I mean, he's got the usual gamut: fake moon landing, fake 9/11, chemical warfare turning people gay, mind control satellites, the works. No idea if he's actually a lunatic or he just plays one on TV.

Elves would /hate/ him. Not a single grain of dignity.

That's actually very interesting read.

Elves are like humans mostly, so if you clip their ears, they can achieve salvation. We are compassionate and invite our elven brothers into heaven with us.

Alternatively, elves reach adulthood at the same pace humans do, and menstruate the same way humans do, and even have the same number of eggs humans do.
So you have female elf fertility between 15 and 50 years of age, say. After that, he elf might live to be 5000 years old, but will not be able to give birth past their 50th year, since they would have ran out of eggs.

Ballpark numbers, of course, I am too lazy to check for real ones or do math, but basically you have elves being humans who (for some fantasy reason) evolved to continue their rejuvenation process beyond 20-25 years of age, and not have their body deteriorate and cease repairing itself.
Or in even more basic terms, elves don't get cancer. Their system of cell reproduction is either perfect, or their system of policing cell reproduction is perfect, and thus they can repair all damage to their systems and replace any cells in their systems, and so not "age" beyond reaching adulthood.

It's called money, user. Otaku gonna whale on anime merch, and execs are fully willing to make trash that sells. Cute girls sell, so they get made. Unless you wanna make the fantasy version of Free! which runs the risk of trying to sell to a niche demographic, and therefore not meeting projected profits.

So would a human-elven alliance/partnership/mutual-benfits type of government?

Pic and story links related:

>1d4chan.org/images/4/4e/Lessons.png

>1d4chan.org/images/6/60/FurtherEducation.png

>1d4chan.org/images/3/39/LandOfCloudAndMists.png

I hope the original author does not mind or does not think I'm over-shilling his work, but to the original author. I do like the premise and would love to see more too.

Anyways, how would such a Political, Economic and Military Alliance/Partnership/Mutual-Benefits type of government between a technologically sophisticated human nation and an elven nation like pic and storylink related's setting work?

You are as bad as him for posting that pic and giving him (You)'s..

Elf males being handsome and pretty is sure taken in a negative light on this board.

That was never an elf, anti-elf shitposter. Please, if you want to bump a thread do it by contributing

Besides the male self-insert hero you only can put so many other male protagonists or supporters. Any male elf would be a direct threat on the MCs claim on his harem. You will more likely find monster races or non-attractive males as supporters.

...

How about you just stick to how these elves are actually portrayed in their settings instead of trying to justify a pic that was never true anywhere.

Meh, elves being androgynous looking was a popular thing. It is your chinny elf thats unusual.

Most classic elves have a middle ground look, a handsome boyish good looks face and frame that can easily be made male or female with minimal adjustments to the image.

>Meh, elves being androgynous looking was a popular thing
Sure, but that pic is about WoW Blood Elves, and even I that never plaxed WoW knows that they don't look like this. And them looking androgynous isn't really that extreme, and it would also go both ways if it would be that extreme instead of this meme that elf males look like girls and elf girls look like... girls.

If you can't tell that this one is a guy you have the head full of memes, not fantasy.

But the meme is that elven boys look like girls, and elven girls look like boys.
The trope was that elven women are flat, have not much curves, and do "manly" jobs like hunting and fighting. At the same time elven men are clean shaven, pretty, well kept, and consider their looks important, and indulge in "girly" activities like not being drunk or eating only select food.
There's also the "they have no honor" thing, the elven cunning, that to the other races makes them feminine. The more egalitarian elven society, with genders being allowed similar roles.

Really there is a lot pointing towards it, you are just selecting a weak link and insisting thats the core. It is not. Elves were always memed as androgynous, long before Warcraft, and including in Warcraft, especially compared to the other races they are in contrast with.

>All these ebin atempts to turn the thread into another fetish cringefest.

Why is it so hard to have a discussion on Veeky Forums about elves?

>But the meme is that elven boys look like girls, and elven girls look like boys
Not in the mind that made that pic, not in the mind of the generic elf-hater and those that masturbate to japanese porn, often the same person.
>and do "manly" jobs like hunting and fighting
They can, but not predominantly, or you rather have to source that. I can only think of night elves, whoch are not all elves.
>At the same time elven men are clean shaven, pretty, well kept, and consider their looks important
So do chads.
>and indulge in "girly" activities like not being drunk or eating only select food
First you have to prove that elves not get drunk occasionally. Then that they don't do what you think only female elves do. Fuck it, even drow have male elves as predominant in their military.
>There's also the "they have no honor" thing, the elven cunning
Either you are retarded for thinking that "honor" means running directly into the blade of the enemy, or all the other races are retarded for thinking that it means that.
>you are just selecting a weak link
I did more work so far than you did.

I blame overused memes, masturbating to porn instead of actually reading source books, and anons with low self-esteem.

Dont bother, hes some autist that gets attracted like moth to flame by that shitty image, he always does this

>he always does this
I post on Veeky Forums like 10 days per year. How can you tell I "always do this"?
And it is my first time seeing (and editing for the joke) this image Are you deliberately strawmanning, or are you just suffering from a harsh victim complex?

>I did more work so far than you did.

Yeah, asking people to prove fantasy stereotypes by quoting sources or whatever, as if its not commonly shared culture among the whole community that dwarves and humans are the bearded vulgar drunks that go on about honor, and elves are the shaven cunning ambush types.

Wait 20 minutes, cool your head, come back neutral and re-read this chain of replies. You will be surprised how you come off, I am sure.

>And it is my first time seeing
It must be your first time browsing Veeky Forums then.

Or maybe your jihad against a picture makes up a small part of the volume of discussion on the board.