What's the meanest thing you could say to a dwarf?

What's the meanest thing you could say to a dwarf?
I only ask because I want to avoid saying it.

That they're as pretty as an elf.

Call them manlets.

"I've seen human girls with better beards than that."

"Is that hair on your face, or did you blow a Rakshasa? I bet you had to get an elf to help you magically grow your beard, you weak-armed, bow-legged, molly-coddled, foppish-looking milksop."

Rocks suck.

You mine like an elf!

I asked for your darkest beer, not this elven pisswater.

I know that your best friend is an elf.

Alright listen to me you bow-legged piece of shit, if you go any further with that shit-stained rat pelt you call a beard I'm gonna beat your ass so hard that you're not gonna be able to crawl with your scrawny little arms! I'm gonna shove my arm down your hideous skaven-looking face your arse is gonna prolapse like a rosebud, then i'm gonna take that rock-on-a-stick you call a warhammer and bash your fucking kneecaps in! I'm gonna rip off your beard and flagellate you with it! I'm gonna slice off your balls with my elvin-ruined sword and use magical incantations to regrow them to only produce elven offspring you fucking milk-sop!

"You fags are literally just unshaven hobbits."

A strong insult recognized by most dwarves:
"Your mother is a halfling, your father is a gnome, and neither has a beard!"
-Insult by prince throlgun of the ember peaks to king graggern of the southern range.

An insult that will get you killed depending on which province you're in:
"Driftbeard"
During the last war Between the human kingdom of Ongoc and the dwarf empire, the dwarves suffered a great defeat at the banks of the Ardur River.
Many of the dead bodies of the dwarves had tumbled down the embankment and ended up in the river, where their waterlogged corpses were likened to "bearded driftwood".
Throughout the war following the battle, the humans used the phrase as an insult towards the dwarves.
As the war progressed, the phrase changed, until a portmanteau of the phrase came into popularity: "beardwood".
For decades after the war, dwarves of the empire would organize lynch mobs for anyone who dared to use the term toward one of their kin.

Youre smelly and cant hold your drink

Hey! Heh heh, how many--heh--how many dwarves does it take to change a light bulb?

NONE! They can't reach it! HAHAHA! They're not TROLL enough!

my undead grandmother with Tremblebones could forge a sword better than you

"You remind me of this elf I know"

Master hobbit, would you fetch me that cask of ale?

You really need to shave.

"I dub thee an honorary elf!"

Probably insulting their ancestors/clan. Dwarves are big on community and tradition, strongly self-identifying with their group/culture and getting much of their self-worth from the achievements of their people. Attack that and a dwarf will probably try to murder you on the spot.

>I only ask because I want to avoid saying it.

Lawn adornment

This, I dont feel like most dwarves would give a fuck about personal insults but they would take "you momma" jokes very seriously

Isn't it about time you shave? you're as beardy as an elf.

Oh shit, it's that travelocity guy.

>Face me if you dare, stunted whelp, or do you lack even an Elven maid's courage? I thought the Sons of Grungni were great warriors, but perhaps you are no true Dwarf. Indeed, maybe you are instead some breed of bearded goblin, though in truth, I have seen a finer beard on a Troll's back-side.

You suck rocks;

>"Your mother is a halfling, your father is a gnome, and neither has a beard!"
MODS!

Meanest, not greatest.

Go fuck a mountain you mineralphile grudge-making keg-blooded rock-brained armpit-licker little shit-dweller. Here's something you stocky fuckers cant craft: hygiene. You have the gut to shit on the other cultures when half of the crap you do can be summed up as "drunken stupor" or "I smacked it a hammer", you pube-eating goat-lickin tiny beardkin.

You'd think dwarves are actually proud of their smell.

Like the Southern French are proud of their cheese.

"Is that your beard, or were you bobbing for mud-tubers?"

>Heres something you stocky fuckers cant craft: hygiene

This is a dry country you can't bring alcohol in.

What a cute little elf! Better not bully it or it might cry.

It is apropiate that you kneel before me...oh wait, that is your height.