You go on a kings quest and rescue his daughter? During the journey you both brcome smitten with each other.
Upon coming back to the castle, you find that the King will reward you with a reasonable fortune but no nobility or his daughter hand, as he plans to use her as politcal currency. What do you do?
Adrian Phillips
Use the fortune to become nobility though a long and extravagant plan. Count of Monte Cristo style
Justin Lewis
Rolled 8 (1d20)
Try to convince the party to help me get the fathers’ blessing.
Carter Adams
Looks like I’m gonna have to cut my losses and move on
Nicholas Peterson
Rolled 12 (1d20)
Shit on clover and its my first time om this board okey nobody laugh at me Okey i hope this works
Gabriel Barnes
This guy gets it
Logan Russell
Rolled 20 + 2 (1d20 + 2)
>Political currency
Well, presuming that this is my most recent character and not actually fat noodly-armed neckbeard me, he's not going to like the results of that if my character and the princess are actually smitten with each other.
Well, actually I suppose the princess could be bi.
>What do you do?
Most likely? My character sneak into her bedroom at night through the window and try and convince the princess to run away with her and go on awesome adventures with her.
A song routine will most likely be involved. Probably a riff on "The Other Side" from The Greatest Showman, as I recently watched that movie so it's on my mind.
My character's untrained in Persuasion but does have a +2 Charisma modifier and the Lucky feat, so let's see how this goes. First without Luck dice spent...
Tyler Murphy
Well, OP, that's as high a result as I can possibly get, so I won't be using Luck die. So does a 22 on my Persuasion check (or it could be Performance, either way it uses Charisma and either way my character's untrained) allow me to persuade the princess to leave it all behind?
>"Don't you wanna get away from the same old part you gotta play >"'Cause I got what you need >"So come with me and take the ride... >"It'll take you to the other side!
>"'Cause you can do like you do >"Or you can do like me >"Stay in the cage, or you'll finally take the key >"Oh, damn! Suddenly you're free to fly >"It'll take you to the other side!"
Tyler Rivera
...
Blake Sanders
Reasonable fortune? That's just what my current character would want from the king Screw nobility and princesses, all he needs is gold for taverns and brothels
Charles Rodriguez
I found out his daughter was a filthy Orc-fucking slut. She insists she was raped by Orcs but for all I know she may have fucked them willingly.
I laugh as I take the money, amused at the idea of some poor noble cuckold marrying the King's Orc-fucking whore of a daughter.
Carter Gutierrez
I use the fortune to create my own trading empire after which I will live happily as one of the richest people in the world
James Johnson
Bro fist the king and tell him to get a good price on her. Women are objects.
Colton Rivera
>the King will reward you with a reasonable fortune but no nobility or his daughter hand That is an outrage! First, cut off his daughter's hand and take it for myself,
Jeremiah Gonzalez
This. All you effectively did was return his property to him undamaged and he rewarded you for it, that's a good deal. Only cucks would be upset.
Becoming attached to this piece of property is like being attached to a book or scroll you're bringing back. The only difference is that you can fuck this property, but you can use the money to fuck countless whores anyway.
Grayson Torres
>t.permavirgin Here’s your (you) however, if you got solid proof that princess is sucking dick on the side you better drop that bitch
Landon Allen
>You go on a kings quest
No, I don't, because I forgot to pick up an important item on the first screen which I needed halfway through the game, and now I'm dead.
Aaron Thompson
...
Ryan Johnson
Bury my seven inches of sorrow inside the Princess's busty "maid" and weep freely into her welcoming figure.
Nolan Howard
Fuck her handmaid, then take my new riches right to the club.
Hudson Perez
I politely but firmly inform the king that it is not his decision what I take from him, but my own. I expect that this gold is the first of many payments of tribute to my glory, and that having my goodwill is significantly more valuable than whatever alliances his daughter may have been used to form. After all, he can have many daughters but only one life , and if he persists in objecting he'll have neither.
Ayden Hall
>playing the exiled princess of the High Imaskari people, having been driven into exile by the revolt that overthrew her people's kingdom Point out that I have no need of a title, because I've already got a higher one, and accept the monetary reward. I then ask if I could remain a while, perhaps to be introduced to the prince?
Brandon Morgan
>You go on a kings quest and rescue his daughter? Why is as a question? Are we not clear about what happened?
Henry Roberts
Stop trying to force a meme you gaylord
Cameron Hall
Rolled 8 (1d20)
Tell him that I'm willing to accept the payment in monthly installments for just 10% down and 3.5% interest.
Landon Morris
>campaign hopper
Probably elope. Start franticly thinking up excuses as to why he finally returns to his betrothed after several years with another woman. Knowing my GM, it's for naught as the betrothed is bi enough to accept both.
>JJBA campaign Stay close to princess. Wait until the first political marriage. Challenge the would-be husband to a cage match, suplex him hard enough to crack the chapel floor and claim his right of marrying the princess as a result. Lez out in front of the king because lol anti-authoritarian.
Kayden Jenkins
>But thou must! Situation will resolve itself in Dragon Warrior fashion. Deny the king's reward to seek your own fortune in other lands, Gwaelin refuses any reality in which she doesn't accompany you as your wife.
Luke Hill
underrated.
Carson Lopez
>political currency One of his dukes may have already delivered his side of a marriage agreement. Eloping could start a civil. If she's not a spoiled brat she'll stoically accept her responsibility.
Brandon Gray
Well, the daughter thing is to be expected, but really? No title? Nigger can't spare a small allodial village or something and make me a knight? This is bullshit.
Robert Gomez
>Stop trying to force a meme you gaylord The worst part is that he's chosen to use the booty for ants version of that picture to spam.
Juan Stewart
Depends on the other players and what they want to do. It’s a decent plot hook, pushing the group off to try and get enough fame to get the woman’s hand, or maybe it creates a villain (a-la Berserk) of my character because I take the daughter away with me, or it could be that I just give up and this tempers the characters personality and how he acts in the future. Maybe the bard has a cunning plan, and dislikes the arbitrary rules of nobles and eggs me into one of the Berserk option. Maybe the wizard comes up with a cunning plan to trick the king into letting his daughter marry me.
Moreover, what else is going on? Why was I rescuing his daughter? From what was I rescuing her? Is this jsut the start of a grand campaign again a Necromantic king, and through my following actions I might be able to save the kingdom and thus be rewarded? Was it a fun side-track, but there are really more important things to be done so I have to put it away, bite my tongue, and save the world? Am I in some way related to the king (great-great-great uncle was a minister or something), and that’s why I rescued her?
Knowing my current players, they’d probably just try killing the king in front of the court and get slaughtered. Fucking idiots that they are.
Jack Jenkins
Where is the full image?
Brayden Bennett
best post.
"then would you KINDLY EXPLAIN why whatever ALLY you were planning to SPEND HER ON did not CARE enough to save her themself?"
Luke Lopez
I don't think you understand how bargaining works. If the king told the would be husband to go get his daughter himself, the king would have no leverage, nothing to offer
Evan Morgan
If the daughter was already bethrothred then the other noble may have sent out his own adventurers
William Hall
The coward noble waited for adventurers rather than go out and save the girl himself. Now because he waited, the poor girl's pussy has been stretched out by Orcs so much that no human cock will ever be satisfied in that bust up vag.
Connor Harris
Take the money and fuck off. Romance on the job is unprofessional as fuck.
Justin Hernandez
I don't see the problem. This is entirely okay, and it's the standard reward.
You know who decided to try everyone's patience? Griffith. You don't want to end up like Griffith, do you?
Levi Williams
>Cuck her husband & become her husband's greatest knight/his most trusted guard to her. Lance her a lot
Brandon Reed
Go & conquer his enemies Become my own king Take her
Easton Morgan
Inform him that while he may be king, he may rule these lands and be monarch of many thousands of souls, there is a law that stands above him and his throne , which no righteous man would impugn upon.
That law is, of course, >finders keepers
Justin Adams
>You go on a kings quest and rescue his daughter? So I'm a bootlicker who worships men for the deeds of their fathers. Right... >During the journey you both brcome smitten with each other. So I'm also an awkward teenager driven by hormone fueled boners into being a literal white knight. Okidoki. >Upon coming back to the castle, you find that the King will reward you with a reasonable fortune but no nobility or his daughter hand, as he plans to use her as politcal currency. What do you do? First of all I question the legitimacy of the king's rule. Then I take my money and leave. There are more piranha's in the lake that no sane man should swim in.
Michael White
Griffith's down fall was he threw a hissy fit because one man actually stood up to him and proved he wasn't just a mindless boot licker. Otherwise Griffith was perfectly on track to obtain everything he wanted and desired with time.
Also bad question to ask since some people believe he unironicly did nothing wrong, besides making the worst possible choices during a tantrum that led to his situation.
Colton Cruz
How much is a "reasonable fortune"? How 'smitten' are we? As long as I'm not losing sleep sending carrier pigeons to her all through the night, I'm fine. Generally speaking, I'll take the money over a woman.
Alexander Adams
>You have selected REGICIDE.
Bentley Phillips
Nothing. I'm not royalty, therefore I can't marry a princess.
Jaxson Myers
I didn't realize fantasy heroes usually consumed so much soy
Gabriel Martin
Not nobility. He was only pretending to be a noble.
Evan Scott
Until she makes her vows, it's her father's responsibility to take care of her
Evan Cruz
Go back to red.dit
Chase Martin
If he hasn't yet decided on a prince he wants to forge an alliance with, the party and I carve out our own kingdom and gather reknown such that I cannot be ignored as a marriage candidate. If he has already decided, then that only eliminates the question of where we start our conquest. We chucklefucks were all doomed to end up fighting the world anyways, might as well do it for questionable truth and shallow love.
Xavier Adams
>I'm not royalty, therefore I can't marry a princess Motherfucker, do you hear the people sing?
Cooper Bell
>le monarchy is bad fag
It wasn't kings who killed and oppressed hundreds of millions in the 20th century and removed freedoms long standing for centuries.
Republicanism is a shit.
Gavin Gray
It wasn't kings who dropped the nuclear bomb and declared drone striking random villages is a-okay.
Republicanism is a shit.
Xavier Hall
Realize that life doesn't exactly hand out happily ever afters and that my infatuation with the princess probably isn't even love, take the money, say good-bye and move on.
Josiah Evans
Sigh, shrug, pick up the reward, and make payroll. Budget for repairs to damaged equipment, combat loss what can't be repaired. Inventory the salvage we got, sell off what we can't take with us. If it was a good haul, we probably just doubled our take for this operation. Give the company furlough and a bonus. Leave the princess a leaflet with the company details on it, and let her know we're always looking for new recruits, especially resourceful people who can make their own way to us. But we're gone from this place in 48 hours, so if she knows anyone who'd like to sign up, they should know they need to hurry. The life of a mercenary leaves little to no room for lengthy romances, especially forbidden ones with secret meetings and courtly intrigue. There are contracts to bid on and battles to be fought, for the right price. Go get some drinks, start digging for new work, and wait and see if we happen to get a new face before we break camp.
Levi Cook
>That moment when some glorified tinpot dictator thinks they're slighting you, when they're actually letting you burn limit due to your Yozi patron's Exquisite Bride Obsession.
Grayson Moore
He bought a noble title from the King. He wasn't a traditional noble but he was still a titled Count.
Wyatt Stewart
Ask the princess. Her will is my command. Not that I give a fuck, but it is the chivalrous thing to do.
Adam Davis
Is she heir apparent to the throne?
Joseph Howard
>reasonable fortune how reasonable?
Easton Watson
>Republicanism is a shit. I agree with that, though not in the way you intended.
Levi Price
...
Evan Martinez
Kidnap the princess and put her back in whatever peril I rescued her from. If it doesn't exist anymore (rescuings are sometimes violent after all) then just kill her and be done with it. Basically, if I can't have her then fuck everything.
Anthony Hall
at least you didn't get mauled by a bear near the first town
Jackson Jenkins
But will you become noble in time before the daughter is married off?
Adam Williams
>No title, no princess >Essentially, I'm still a nameless sot but with a ton of money
I join the resistance, and fund their training and equipment with my newly attained wealth. If we survive to the point where we're on the castle doorstep, I walk in to meet the king personally, donning full plate so he doesn't recognize me.
As I corner him, I say "this all could have been avoided."
Him; "h-how?"
Me, lifting visor to show him my grinning face; "you know how."
Then stick the fucker like the pig he is.
Henry Barnes
Is he even wrong? Gain: 1 live daughter Lose: her hand, some land for new noble, and dowry Also, children from this marriage will grow up into pretenders (girl meant to be married away, so heir is someone else). It's like having bastards minus all the fun parts. Honestly, it's cheaper to pay ransom fee.
Ethan Gonzalez
we also fight for a hard boiled egg.
Jonathan Foster
underrated post.
Gavin Bell
>It wasn't kings who killed and oppressed hundreds of millions in the 20th century Yeah, because they were deposed for doing that centuries earlier.
Adrian Sullivan
>During the journey you both brcome smitten with each other. beep boop does not compute now dispense money King-Unit for task completion
Henry Sanchez
Confirmed for not knowing what chivalry means
Isaiah Jenkins
Run away with her.
Aaron Perez
Democrats aren't much better.
Logan White
Yes they are, even if they do often fall short of where I'd like them to be.
Adrian Edwards
You know this is a game of heroic fantasy and not one of being a little bitch, right?
James Gomez
>working for sneaky snakey shithead Not even once.
Connor Murphy
But consider that the sort of people who you hire to rescue princesses tend to also come violently unhinged if slighted, so you might just be endangering your life and your rule once they go apeshit
Charles Bell
Also being tortured for a year after he flipped out.
Aaron Jackson
>what is the the Colonial era
Jonathan Diaz
Then I will send noble knights to rescue my girl from this villain that just revealed his true colors.
Isaiah Hall
Remember my oath of crown and accept it while waiting for a new person to smite.
William Miller
>you will never marry the smite
Jayden Stewart
nice
Elijah Hall
Pretty good answer. Don't know how the girl will feel about that though.
Isaiah Hill
Why, I'll just scale the castle walls and take her virginity in the night, of course.
William Fisher
Who will be butchered or recruited. Or struck dead by potent sorcery. If they are capable of dealing with whatever your knights apparently couldn't, then they can certainly deal with your knights. Adventurers are exceptional people with exceptional abilities, and exactly the sort of people you should be making ties with. She's clearly not promised to anyone else, because if she was you'd be pointing the adventurers at them. Thus, you seem to be in the business of antagonizing powerful people and painting a target on your head
Isaac Robinson
Assuming the daughter has nay agency herself to have a staff, hire on as her seneschal and maintain her household for years. In the process likely cucking whatever foreign prince she's lovelessly bound to for decades while he spends half or more of his year doing relevant things in the political capital of his country and we travel around and hang out at the country estates.
Landon Parker
I tell the king it's fine I can't smash his daughter's pus so long as he gives me a fucking sallet or something. I'm tired of rocking around my great great great grandfather's bucket helm.
Hunter Robinson
Take the money.
I start an elaborate scheme to make pornography more rampant in the kingdom and easily available, for example, I distribute porntubes which are parchments rolled around an enchanted devide that wraps around a man's penis and deliciously sucks it when they look at the parchment. I make sure a lot of this parchment contains cuck porn.
I use all my influence and money to make sure marriages are now easily dissolved and to dislocate the strong family structure. I promote the use of drugs, alcohol and casual sex in youth, by sending scantily-clad droves of bar girls to appear at parties and serve alcohol, and I train and do the publicity of several group of Bard Bands with gyrating pelvis dances, that elicit wetness in the loins of many a young lady, so that people no longer consider sex to be a mere question of loving relationships between man and wife, but a need that both have and that needs to be met, or that will be cause for divorce.
Since the princess isn't happy with being married off, her being smitten with me, I suppose her husband will have plenty of need for porntubes. I shall pretend to befriend him and "be a bro" while handing him some cuckold porntubes to keep him not too frustrated.
Once he is sufficiently into the idea of cuckporn, I shall make my move and become the couple's bull.
Asher Long
>First of all I question the legitimacy of the king's rule You get executed, banished and get no treasure because you couldn't keep your mouth shut and just had to spew your redditisms all over the royal court.
Cameron Sanchez
So, leik, you talk your GM into going full magical realm on you?
Connor Garcia
>magical realm Oh you sweet summer child
Nicholas Bailey
Follow my dream
Joshua Cook
hi kyle
Isaac Murphy
Burning down a kingdom's society in the name of a princess. Perfect.