Vent to me, Veeky Forums. What are the little quirks idiosyncrasies of your players/dms that really get on your nerves...

Vent to me, Veeky Forums. What are the little quirks idiosyncrasies of your players/dms that really get on your nerves, but not to the extent that they're That Guy-tier or otherwise meriting actively confronting them over it?

one of my players has this hand that always flaps around when he's running i don't know if it's stuck like that permanently but he gets it caught on things like fences and asks for help

i can't tell if he is being for real or just fucking with me i don't want to be an asshole but it's slowing down the game

The DM in a 5e game I’m playing in has a standing rule wherein when rolling attacks or saves ties go to the defender. I have no idea why and it seems so unnecessary and counter to the very basic concept of a target number to me.

Nerve damage or something? Maybe he has some backstory he is dying to drop on you about it but you never ask.

>start off dming really happy and putting a lot of effort into branching paths and options for doing stuff
>my players don't even read what their class/race can do, have to spoonfeed them
>they won't do anything but get into random barfights and try to pick up chicks (poorly)
>have to railroad to get any progress done
>game ends up as a dungeon-of-the-week that is really just one room with a flashy boss that takes the entire session
>finish it
>people say it was their favorite campaign
>fucking what how, I hated the thing

I finally convinced them to open the fucking book and they're slowly improving, but holy shit did I hate that campaign.

A couple of my players keep recreating characters they've had for years in various games, across various systems. They don't do it for EVERY game, but it's happened often enough over the years that it kinda bugs me. It's like dragging a security blanket around, but you've had it for so long and it's been washed so much that it's tattered and ratty and starting to smell and has mysterious stains on it, but you refuse to let it go, and when someone calls you out on it, you cry.

>other players treat every NPC they meet like shit for no reason
>GM never gives them consequences for this

Asking to use homebrew. 99% of Homebrew is shit, but unfortunately 100% of Homebrewers think THEIRS is the 1% that isn't.

I never have and never will allow homebrew, and I outright state this before games or in my game applications... yet both IRL and online there's always SOMEONE who will go through the cycle of swearing up and down that some garbage broken homebrew they found is totally balanced and interesting and fits with the tone of the game and can't be done by existing cross classing and... fuck, WE GO THROUGH THIS SHIT EVERY TIME!

So, like, if your'e attacking a dude with 17 AC and you roll a 17 it doesn't hit?

Isn't the official rule that ties always go the way that benefits the player? Why does your DM do this?

sounds like a leftover from Palladium. Does he play palladium system? It works just as well in your favor, nbd

They're slow in general, but that's okay. I'm not the fastest too. "An hour and a half or more to get through a simple room" is excessive, but they're still learning. It's okay.

One refuses to talk. No reason, just won't talk. (IRC-based game with long time friends, they only type.) I want to move us to a voice platform so we can speed up. No one enjoys the slow pace and it's a complaint every time, but I move as quickly as I can and respond immediately. Everyone else is on board and has tried to convince them. No dice. But they're my core player who I absolutely would not kick out, and when they do type, they're by far my best. Leaves me at an impasse.

Sam, use your mic already

Guy in my group starts getting shitty when rolls don't favour him, some kind of swearing every time pretty much, but if he consecutively misses or nat1s something he gets real shitty. First really big fight he rolled a 1 attacking a guy down a staircase and he just about walked out.

Oh yeah and he chews with his mouth open.

One of my players insists on having his knight walk around in full armor at all times

I swing my sword with savagery and malice, rolled an 18

Hit, roll damage.

9 piercing.

Ok he's hurt, next player.

>Goddamn GM is like a fucking robot with combat. He loves talking about the world and how it looks, smells, sounds etc but GOD FORBID he describe combat in more than 5 syllables. Still love playing with him though

One player always tells the GM "oh that must be worth more XP/an inspiration point/a special item, come on!" This isn't an MMORPG where every little action spawns a little bubble over your head with rewards.

i knew a guy like this who apparently got made fun of in a skype group full of shitheads outside of my network of contacts for his voice and it messed him up so bad he literally never voice-chatted again. some people just have the thinnest shells.

Continued because just posting this got me all riled up and I need to vent. She does this shit for the most fucking mundane shit too. I cast Chaos Bolt! Roll for dmg... it's a kill! "Ohhh that's SICK come on GM give me an inspiration point it was REALLY FUCKING SICK I ONE SHOT THE GUY"

No that's not sick it's what you do every fucking combat round, cast chaos bolt. Every. Fucking. Round. Doing exactly what everyone at the table knows you're going to do and randomly rolling well does not give you anything extra, you're just roll-playing and it's definitely the opposite of being worthy of inspiration points.

When I dm I will go into detail on the killing blow and/or critical hits/misses, it seems like a lot of effort to explain every swing.

It is but my players are combat junkies, story is barely needed because they like killing interesting things. It makes it more memorable for them. It's mostly simple description anyway.

This is my group too. We are improving incredibly slowly.

>>have to railroad to get any progress done
Ask how I know you’re a shite DM

No. Rolling the target number on a roll is a success.

On contested rolls, a tie means the status quo remains.

How do you know he's a shit DM and not someone with shitty players?

>railroad
>progress done
If you don’t understand why this is a fucked mindset that will result in shitty games, then I’m not sure if I can help you.

Go read the Alexandrian or something.

Ah sorry I though you had something to say. My mistake.