A peculiar bloodline of vampires begin to appear at night, their diet being solely composed of fresh fruit

>Implying they don't pay
>and aren't excellent tippers

Oy vey!

So they only feed on elves?

Too sour.

"Would you take this runeforged axe for this crate of mangoes?"
"Cash only, sorry..."
"Darn it."

What if they like their fruity-tangy-citrusy flavor?

Inb4 vampiric juice cleanse to immortality is a thing

I prefer Eastern Red Bats

Bloodline Cullen.
Clan disciplines: Kineticism, Presence, Fruitiness
Clan weakness: Looking sparkly and gay.

It's been done and it was good, so why not?

I have actually read this.

>A blood line of vampire that subsists only on chocolate.

>the vampires are insects instead of bats

Do you want me believe he sliced this lemon so neatly in half with his bat hands? It's clearly a propaganda piece by VIDF

OY GEVALT

I remember that book!
The scene where they try to steak the bunny was pretty good.
That was not a spelling mistake.

This reminds me, at what point did vampire lore change to vampires actually being humanoid bat people as opposed to simply being shapeshifting beings that occasionally turn into bats?

>female fruitpires
>busty female fruitpires
>busty female fruitpires with delicious citrus juice instead of milk
>oppai loli fruitpires with delicious citrus juice instead of milk

Help, some of this might actually make it into my setting

It can't really be considered juice anymore, not at that concentration.

kek
Men of impeccable taste.

>The older ones instead produce fruit based alcohol, earning them several dwarven allies.

>her rustle down stairs
>go down and turn on kitchen light
>fucking vampire has all your fucking honey figs and pears in his arms

>Fine, you can live in the barn, in the trees, whatever.
>And?
>And you can have a quarter-
>A third.
>Now hold-
>A. Third.
>Fine. A third of all fruit harvests. But you'll keep to your word or I'll see my orchard burnt before you feed on it.
>Our word is our bond, and our blood is the ink that scribes it. We shall protect the orchard and your family and extract a long vengeance when we can't.

You're wrong. Fruit bats are adorable.

>young vampires primarily stay in bat form to increase sympathy from sapient beings
youtube.com/watch?v=GtWcmYhz9tE

>A mad scientist discovers a way towards immortality by creating the juicer and creates several abominations to steal fruit from the nearby farmers to continue his depraved fruit and vegetable flavored unlife.

>Not impeachable taste

ONE. JOB!

...

>I want to suck your blood oranges

>On a fullmoon the werewolves begin to stalk the shadowy streets in earnest pouncing upon people to get headpats and treats.

Show proofs

> werecats constantly break into your home and sit on top of the stuff that you really need right now

>A 600 ibs werecat in it's war-form sits on top of your hands while you type

That's what you get for biting millennials.

>Be a Ventrue who only feeds on go getter interns who enjoy soy decaf

Call me soy boy all you want but watch as I straighten my tie and calculate how little fucks I give with When I bust out Fortitude

You're right, I can offer no explanation as to why that failed to register...

Hang on, let me bust out the Toreador opinion on the Ventrue...

(if you have access to it, I HIGHLY recommend reading Clanbook: Toreador Revised, if for nothing else than the opinion on the rest of the clans. A lot of it is downright hilarious - and also does a good job of showcasing why the Toreador are a major clan despite their stereotypes).

>1/2

>Ventrue are all right. By and large they like things the way they are, which means they're quite good at keeping things from getting worse. Compare and contrast with the Tremere, who long to become "Big Brother", or the Giovanni, who want to turn everyone into their personal fuck-puppets, or the Malkavians, who want to upset the apple cart just to count the worms crawling out of the rotten ones.

>There's a lot of talk about Ventrue "control", which is mostly smoke and mirrors. The Ventrue don't "control" a police force to the extent that they dictate who walks every beat in one of "their" cities. They may have a ghoul doing paperwork, and they may have a blood bond on one of the lieutenants, but their greatest talent lies in cleaning things up.

>Think about that for a moment.

>When some neonate slips the leash and runs amok in Planet Hollywood, the Ventrue are going to be on it within an hour, tweaking the memories of the cops and the witnesses to match up their Patent Bullshit Story of the moment. (They've got hundreds of bullshit stories prepared, for just about every situation. I've even seen an Internet archive - it's on a database, presumably so Ventrue all over the world can just type in the parameters of the problem and obtain a list of "plausible explanations.") They can sanitize that mess quickly, efficiently, and finally.

>2/2

>They're also good at plans. Once they realize who trashed the restaurant, they find him, and they have him dealt with. Note that I didn't say "take him out." A lazy Ventrue might do his own dirty work, but "lazy" isn't what the Ventrue look for in their childer. No, they prefer "sneaky" and "devious" and "cunning". Thus, your average Ventrue is more likely to let the neonate think he's gotten away with his little frenzy, until the Ventrue offers the option of either a blood hunt or a suitable ironic twist of fate. (They love suicide missions - generally they point 'em at the Sabbat, but they do their share of sniping at the Tremere, the Setites and other Ventrue, and even us every now and then.) They may take generations, but they have a great track record of playing the "Let's you and him fight!" game.

>They're great at "before" and they're great at "after". What they have trouble with is "during". They're so used to the long view that they're not so good at improvising. That's where we come in - especially since we're generally better at seeing people as individuals instead of feedbags or insignificant insects.

A friend of mine gave me a bunch of splats for the OWoD game. Fuck I regret loosing that stuff since WoD was my first TT I got into.

That and I have a nWoD book that is basically unused

>They are Americans

Thanks, user!

the vampire don't just eat fruit, they are fruit

The Revised Clanbooks are actually all pretty good reads...and a lot of them seem to go out of their way to point out that the Toreador are far more dangerous than a read-through of the core rulebook would lead you to believe.

The Assamite Clanbook, for example, has the guy narrating outright telling you that if a Toreador is calling himself a master swordsman, DO NOT SWORD FIGHT HIM, unless you've got a lot of backup, and guns, and flamethrowers, and you know what just forget the sword.

Toreador pursue their chosen arts with fanatical, Rain Man-like obsession and a Toreador who's decided to become the best swordsman on the planet will cut you into ribbons faster than you can say "Haqim's Circumcised Schlong this hurts."

Their combination of Celerity and Presence is a killer, since Celerity is by a wide margin the best physical Discipline, and Presence works on ANY vampire, no matter the Generation, unless they're ready for it; theoretically it could hit Caine himself.

>Mfw I just bought a bag of tangerines, pomegranates, and bananas.

D-do fruit vampires work on classic vampire rules? Does garlic work? Do I have to invite them inside?

There was a book series for kids called bunnicula

Yes but they'll always ask nicely and probably offer some compensation for it as well.

I used to watch that show. Weird as hell but enjoyable.

>D-do fruit vampires work on classic vampire rules?
No, they work by fruitpire rules.

>Does garlic work?
No, but Tomatoes will have a similar effect to rice on a normal vamp would. They just can't figure out if a Tomato is a fruit or a vegetable, and will spend endless hours debating with themselves over if they should bite the thing or not. For each one, too - putting a tomato patch in your garden will routinely fry fruitpires who get caught outside by the sun, still confused by the tomatoes.

For a more garlic-like effect, one can use raw meat. It doesn't quite stack up to the proper garlic reaction, but they do try to avoid it where possible, the same way a human might avoid stepping in a puddle of sewage unless the circumstances demand it. Just don't use this trick to try to save your fruit - the fruitpire can still get through, unlike the normal garlic does with normal vamps.

>Do I have to invite them inside?
That's just good manners. All vampires are well mannered. But you're safe as long as there's no fruit in your home - they probably won't even want to come in if that's the case.

>Source: I am a fruitpire.

>their diet being solely composed of fresh fruit
>nit blood
not a vampire. fuck off faggit

>a bloodline of vampires that, after the feast known as the American Civil War, LARP as Confederate soldiers risen from the grave to try to reignite the conflict but accidentally start the KKK

That was one of the first books I read by myself as a child.

Damn it, I was going to say something about botched resurrection ritual, when bat blood was by accident swapped with tomato sauce.

>getting drunk off some ancient lolipire's tits

user I didn't need this tonight

I came here to post this

well duh, they're fruitpires. Did you even read the thread?

This

Fruit bats are based as fuck. I have a colony of them near my house and they're so much fun to watch. They can get pretty noisy though.

>Americans eating fruit that isn't in jello or jam.

Does that make them undead plants?

That reminds me of something.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_pumpkins_and_watermelons
Fruitpires vs vampire pumpkins!

>once in a while, they don't drain a fruit all the way
>the fruits soon rise as vampires themselves
>they carry the curse with them and hunt the juice of their fellow fruits
>the countryside is afflicted with a growing swarm of living, crop-destroying vampire fruit

...

Disease carrying rodents