If the Emperor had a Podcast - Episode 2: The Black Templars, Dorn's Angry Boys is now out. Praise the Emperor

God, Dorn is incarnating Gorillaman at full strenght

ironically though Guilliman would had said the same thing

>im Sick of shitting on the Ultramarines
Oh boy GS3 is coming

>Roboute, you made daddy proud, that eldar has a booty that could make my deteriorated sexual organs hard

SHUT UP SIGISMUND

Never!

That first patron question was... Jesus. I think I forgot some words in English from that.

i'll throw you into the Eye of Terror

>tfw your sons are retarded

Waah.

Holy shit the custodes are Flipping their unified shits

I AM CRUSADING INWARDLY!

Helbrecht reminds me of Walugi

Holy shit, could we be at the cusp of a Custodes faction split?

MAIM KILL BURN

B O M B T H E N O R M A L S !

>Ersiditodes is 4chins

B O I

REEEEEE

I ship it with Billy

Custodes feel more and more ooc compared each podcast.

i need more boy's fanart

I think that they're starting to pull a Kitten and developing some more independence.

I'm beginning to think that going to the Black Library is something that has an effect on Custodes. Like How hanging out with Rogal is helping Boy get better, at least when that hanging out doesn't involve getting hurt and/or bullied by most everyone else in the room.

I’m shocked Sensei weren’t brought up at the breeding program letter.

Or a joke about letting all fragments of your soul try to talk at once as Revan got more incoherent.

Or a joke about Black Templar teaching Ratlings hygiene.

...

i need more of boy's fanart

We need punished boy,

youtube.com/watch?v=cv8QgM_hv34

i want to get a hug from lord adorable

>not hating your injury so they dissapear
[CRUSADES ETERNALLY]

Incidentally, this is how i discovered once a treatment to mosquito bites.
>Summer
>Fucking mosquitos everywhere
>Get bitten constantly
>Itchy as fuck
>At one point just get angry enough to try out some desperate measures
>Go to kitchen
>Start drawing as hot water as possible from the tap
>Immerse part of bitten skin under the flowing water for five seconds
>Notice immediately that the bite no longer itches
>Repeat with all bites
>No more itching

It was upon that day that i discovered that with burning hatred you can cure your ailments.

YOU ARE THE PRIDE OF THE IMPERIUM!

I did something similar only I repeatedly rubberband snapped them.

Ah yes she is a cutie

Who force get the queen of mars?

>never say never
can't wait for boy to become a marine

Chapter Master Boy of the Imperial Fists when?

I fucking need an image macro of whammodes screaming about bombing the normies

God I want Magnus to be part of the Thousand Sons episode if they ever get around to the traitors

That's gonna be interesting given that the Thousand Sons got told to get cracking on redeeming themselves a while back.

Plus Magnus is kinda headed back to Terra, so I'm not sure when they'll meet up again.

>Magnus returns to Imperial Palace with Kitten
>Finds the Thousand Sons there
>They start cheering with joy that they found their Primarch again
>Magnus asks what the fuck they're doing on Terra
>"To Make the Imperium Great Again!"

C R U S A D N G
I N W A R D L Y

>Boy gets the implants and is then personally trained by Dorn

They could keep entirely to canon about the meeting between the Big E and Bobby G and still have the emperor as a rambolic shit considering guilliman had such a hateboner for his father after they talked.

I expect nothing less than an explosion of vitrol in roboutes direction.

I'm personally expecting Guliman to show up with his waifu and a bunch of other eldar dicks after Russ and Khan show up with Vect and the Emps is gonna be pissed that yet more Eldar are in his throne room and insult Gulliman's waifu.

>WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE SO MANY ELDAR HERE
>[muffled "BAZINGA" in the distance]

Tuesday or Friday?

Any day of the week

And then Cegorach shows up I guess, and then 4 of the biggest dicks in the galaxy will all be in one room.

And that is the sound of Slaanesh popping a boner at that phrasing.

MAIM KILL BURN

this
don't argue over food, just eat it when you like to

>holy shit son, believe me I know 10k years on life support might make a man a little liberal with his choice of partner but you couldn't even hook up with a decent looking eldar?
>THOSE CHEEKBONES
*rawbooty bullying intensifies*

Reminder that Emps made human/eldar pairings legal in the first Q&A episode after hearing of LCB.

Just because it's legal doesn't mean that he wants a bunch of fucking Eldar in his throne room.

Or that he can't have an opinion about who his son is dating.

So considering one of the Custodes was screaming "MAIM! BURN! KILL!" anyone else think there might be just a LITTLE Choas corruption going on?

>uriah jacobus corrupted the pillerstodes while he was argueing with Emps
Surely not...
...right?

"MAIM! BURN! KILL!" is almost as common a Khornite chant as "Blood for the blood god, skulls for the skull throne"

which episode was that

Wasn't it Emps messing with everyone there so that not-Sigismund would get the point?

The Black Templar assumed such, but their conversations after he was gone indicated that Emps was not at fault.

>Kharn moonlights as a Custodsi and that's why he wasn't available for the Slaaneshmas special

I’ll be that guy.
I’m like 10 mins in and it’s just templar screaming. It’s not funny and it’s agitating my ears.

Does it get better or do I bail now?

Holy shit Helbrecht sounded like the psyker from DoW, i was half expecting him to scream "WITNESS YOUR DOOOOM" at any moment.

It was the last podcast.

nah, he is just the medieval old geezer archetype that sounds like an old overzealous priest.

It remained kind of annoying but yeah the first 10-15 minutes were the worst.

WEEEEEEEEEEH

WAAAAAAH

Maybe it's related to the epilepsy inducing flashing at the start of the episode?

That a real thing. Enough heat and the material that makes it itchy breaks down

>tfw emps calls guilliman "a big fucking tool"

Speaking of the "canon" story line, and what the Thousand Suns are up to, I just found this.
youtu.be/6adES3Z0Qag
Wasn't it mentioned at somepoint that the events of Wrath of MAgnus happened shortly before the Ultramarines "retrieved" Magnus? I think it was one of the previous podcasts, maybe?

Wow, Moonman is the Emperor? It all makes sense.

>WOO, LINCOLN LOYALIST
what would a few of there songs be
we know about Purging (crawling)

The Sorcerer who sent the letter to the Emperor does indeed confirm that they had "Successfully carried out their latest revenge plot against the fucking furries on Fenris." So, yes I would assume Wrath of Magnus happened in TTS.

>Oh boy GS3 is coming
Settle down, first we have to get through GS1&2. Which given all the buildup with the Chaos Champions, and the conversation between Eldrad and Vect, they probably aren't too far off.
Relatively speaking, of course.

God damn I look forward to these things. Fucking amazing

> what's to interview the most hate-filled group in the imperium
>doesn't invite Chaplain Lemartes
>doesn't invite an Eversor Assassin
>doesn't invite Carcharodons.

What would the interview with these guys like?

at least the Carcharodons were on the list

They did specify most hate-filled CHAPTER

Do not bully the boy

Why is the Emperor defending mutants?
Abhumans are one thing, but aren't mutants generally speaking almost entirely chaos spawn and cannibals or otherwise tainted by warp?

Looking for a good mutant is like looking for a good xeno. Not worth the time and effort.

psykers are technically mutants and he's one
and navigators are literally mutants made by him
plus the line between a mutant and an abhuman can be rather fine, so being careful with who you kill would save many imperial citizens

...

beautiful

Because Black Templars define "Mutant" as "Anyone who even slightly deviates from the human norm"
Which includes Abhumans.

...

i want to fuck boy

Weeh!

Definitely not as good as the prior two episodes, but worth a listen.

>HATE YOU WOUND AND IT WILL CEASE TO EXIST!
>Weeh!
Helbrecht is amazing.

No. Mutation can also come from things like radiation or chemical exposure.

MUH