You are confronted by a 2 meter long version of this mammal...

You are confronted by a 2 meter long version of this mammal. It appears to be using palm fronds and sticks to make a place to sleep.

What do you do?

Roll for initiative. Then probably move 5 hexes, and fire my ER Large Lasers. I'm not expecting to hit it at this range, but the heat should all dissipate when next round hits.

Rolled 17 (1d20)

I roll to seduce.

Is it just long, or does it scale up?
Because if the former, I laugh a little sadly at the poor thing.
If the latter, I make sure to back away without attracting its attention.

Rolled 3 (1d20)

Rolling to befriend the rat platonically

Suffer not the Skaven to live!

Eat it, obviously. Then sleep in it's bed.

Charge my grail knights with zero hesitation

also is that 2m to the end of the tail or just to it's arse?

My Halfling tames it in hopes of one day using it as a mount.

Rolled 6 (1d20)

I roll to summon a giant cat

The Skaven are not real, citizen.

Let him do his thing. Mice are notoriously meek, I'll leave him be.

That is objectively the worst Rifleman in human history. What the fuck are you even doing user.

Can confirm, yes-yes

I PULL OUT MY BERETTA

Can't I just let it go to sleep?

Cuddle

>>/qst/

If it hasn't seen me I stab it in the back and sleep in its bed then eat him the next day for breakfast

Fuck its day up, like I did to that smug moose yesterday, and the flock of gulls that laughed at me the day before.

YOU DO NOT FUCK WITH A STOAT THAT CAN FLY!

I'd ask it where the nearest inn is. Seems like a nice fellow

It informs you that there is one nearby. At the next bend in the road there is a large standing stone, turn left and 400 meters ahead there is an inn. The beer is okay, but the stew is excellent.

Alright
I head in the complete opposite direction, what's over there GM?

Not a Skaven, 40kid.

Ratville. Population 150,000 Rats like the one who gave you the advice.

the same thing I did when I saw a six inch long version of that mammal. I make my girlfriend kill it.

I ask if they have any humans in their cellars/basements that need killing

Nothing. It would explode. Because of the square cube law, it has faster metabolism than an elephant...or us or it would freeze to death. When, you increase the size, it's fast metabolism would heat it up nicely until it kills it and cooks it alive. It would be a true sight to witness.

Words to live by.

Feed
Pet
Love

>my 10 single heatsinks will surely dissipate the 26 heat I'm generating this round from my er large lasers I shouldn't have on this chassis.

Is it confronting me or is it building its home?

Observe from afar.

I think OP meant to say "encounter" instead of "are confronted by."
Either that or he's miffed that you're standing on his building materials.

Try to figure out where it got fronds when the nearest palm is several hours away by car.

AND THATS WHEN I PULL OUT MY REVOLVER

Leave it be.

Unless it's a fancy variety and wants a tummy rub.

"Confronted by" does not necessarily mean a conflict situation, even though that is the commonest use of the expression.

Of course I could forgive you for not knowing that if you were not a native speaker of English, but I think you just jumped in with your objection before you thought it through.

That's not a mouse

Give it all my money, food and weapons like a good good human thing
Only theoretically, since giant rats dont exist, yes yes

Except capybara's are the chillest motherfuckers in the animal kingdom. If they can sit next to a reptilian death machine without giving a fuck, they're not going to break a sweat over a squishy human.

I'd kill for a 4 meter long capybara as a pet.

Attempt to snuggle.

I'd ask it to hang out and drink beers.

If it doesn't talk, I'd get my druid to ask.

If it has never drank beers before, I'd get it drunk and let it loose in my enemy's basement.

Question where it got palm fronds in Wisconsin

>Roll to
>Roll to
>Roll to
>Roll to
Fuck all of you
I love the rest of the fine lads who contributed to the rest of the thread because they are referencing pen&paper rpg, not glorified RNG tabletop.

Quality post, friend. A genuine positive contribution to this thread.

Rolled 3 (1d20)

I roll to appreciate this shitpost

Observe for 12 seconds, then attempt communication. Give food.
Pet ratto, as rattos that size are as smart as dogs so they say.

Rolled 4, 3, 3, 6, 5, 5, 5 = 31 (7d6)

I roll to seduce the shitposter:

"My oh my, user, your veins look lovely today. Tell me more about what you love, and I might share some secrets about encountering large rodents."

I use my shield as cover, it's mitocondria will soon generate enough energy and cause it to explode.

Sufficed to say there have been some tweeks to it's biochemistry.