For those of you that get into the RP.
Have you ever found it difficult to break character?
Or leave the head space of a character?
I'm play a barbarian right now that - well Its not a nice place to be. Im considering not playing him anymore.
Pic sort of related.
I can leave my characters easily so not really.
I do sympathize in that I have made characters that I couldn't play any further because their identity was unpleasant, though. Wearing their persona was a profoundly negative experience and so I simply refused to do so further.
Did.. Didsomeone kill your dog?
I don't play characters who aren't somehow a part of me. Any good, any evil they do; that capacity is within me. Your discomfort is dissonance, because you believe that you don't have the capacity for homicidal fury, yet you're pretending to be somebody who does, and hey look at that, you're pretty good at playing out what that might look like. Embrace the shadow and make it your servant.
Also, learn to separate reality from fantasy. Your characters are you, you are not your characters.
Please don't be That Guy away from the table.
>you don't have the capacity for homicidal fury,
The thing is I do.
I know I do. I live in fear of that part of myself.
Every time I let it slip out I do or say something terrible.
Its this cold, single minded exacting fury.
it feels like i've decided something is going to happen.
Theres no if ands or buts.
I once nearly killed a guy beating him over the head with a glass scented candle.
I had to wash his blood out of my hair.
If my friends didn't pull me off him guy i would have killed him.
Friends of mine say its like I flip a switch. It scares the shit out of them
I thought this character would be a good way to explore and come to terms with this part of myself.
I was bored of Monks and Rogues
But now im not so sure
I can get out of their head space fine, I just can't stop thinking about the character. I probably spend more time thinking about the lives of my characters than I do thinking about my own life.
i wouldnt be friends with you, thats a very serious character flaw.
who knows when i will say/do something that triggers you.
Ive also got the face of a Priest.
Normally I have a reputation as being the guy who'd give a stranger the shirt off my back
Very few people have seen that side of me.
But Not for nothin'.
I wouldn't be friends with me either.
>Have you ever found it difficult to break character?
Are we talking my own or other people's?
You're not Batman, you're not Frank Castle. You do need a therapist, apparently.
This is maybe the edgiest post on Veeky Forums
>Ive also got the face of a Priest.
Do you mean that as "spiritual guide" or "child molester"?
I just remember my character is just a build to win the module, and if anyone else thinks others I initiate PVP against the NPCs/"fellow party members."
This 1000%. I can dip in and out of character effortlessly, but when I'm going about my day when I'm not at the table I'm always thinking about the campaign.
No shit,.
Im some skinny white dude with some serious emotional problems.
The only thing I got going for me is Im willing to cross a few lines and when I snap I don't care if I live or die.
Once some kid pulled a knife on me and I looked him dead in the eye and told him to "put that shit away before I took it from him"
He hesitated and ended up face down in the mud.
Its mostly mind games.
Im not a bad ass. Im mentally ill
Kind eyes, baby faced
I create a character based around a central theme and no more. This theme must be both significant enough to merit character inspiration and vague enough to potentially work when taken at any angle. Most importantly, however, this must be a theme that neither inherently conflicts with other characters nor gives me reason to start conflict.
Additional aspects of the character are developed reactively, less as conscious decisions than recognizing where my roleplay has taken the character. Effectively, I am retroactively giving reason for my character's behavior during this construction process by defining their nuances after they've already been displayed. This is as much interpretation as improvisation.
It typically works well and, moreover, allows me to create a character that interacts interestingly with others while not instigating conflict between players. If reason for non-constructive conflict does arise, just develop a reason that it need not and integrate it into the concept.
Basically: procrastination and bullshitting with enough creativity to make it work.
Okay, so assuming that you're not taking us on a ruse cruise, if you think your violent impulses and aggression are a serious problem then Veeky Forums is not the place to get guidance. Seek professional help from someone more qualified than a faceless poster on an Uzbekistani glazed pottery site.
I guess what Im saying is Im worried this character is exacerbating a part of myself I hate and putting a strain on my already fragile mental health.
You're a self-absorbed edgelord who willingly blurs fantasy and reality, and smugly sits atop his throne of sperg sipping lacroix coconut.
What the fuck lol
>ITT
If that's the case maybe you should stop playing that char, or at least set him up for an arc where he learns to control his anger. (Which is probably what you should do irl also)
See this is why I rarely talk about this shit.
Not even online. Everyone just calls me an edgelord and writes me off as some 17 year old with a power fantasy.
In person, well - I know the second Im honest with a professional im going away for awhile.
I do volunteer work. Im politically active.
I give at least a third of what I earn to various non profits and charities.
I keep just enough to get by and maintain a decent social life
Im trying to be better. I know I'm not well.
But Im genuinely scared of myself.
I feel like Im paying constant penance for something.
But fuck it. Whatever you say chief.
This thread was a mistake
Yes. Mostly because when I RP or pretend to be someone I'm not in my day to day I dig into that little box of horrors I have in the back of my head where I drown and lock away all improper or errant thoughts that aren't conducive to everyday life and bringing them out even a little bit makes them that much harder to put back.
OP
I think I just found out what's worse than edgelords, it's redditspacing edgelords.
Let me ask you a question, asshole
Have you ever had a friend of yours look you dead in the eyes and beg you to save his life and known there was nothing you could do?
Do you know what primal terror looks like?
Have you ever been homeless?
Have you seen the things I've fucking seen?
Done the things I've done.
Im nearly 30 god damned years old and I know for a fact ive already done more living than you'll ever do
That poor enter key.
Okay I'll admit it. I laughed.
Listen man.
I don't know why I made this thread.
I've got a lot going on.
And I know this place aint my blog.
But - I dunno never mind
You sound like an emotional retard with anger issues. Seek professional help if it's really a problem.
If your friends are worried about it they aren't your friends because you can't be a friend to something you instinctively fear.
But that being said blaming it on a "I see red and flip out" is not a valid argument either because the cost of therapy is going to be alot cheaper than your rage taking you straight to the mental asylum or Cell Block A.
This thread is comedy gold
>be alot cheaper than your rage taking you straight to the mental asylum or Cell Block A.
Im already on probation for an incident involving baseball bat.
And yeah. lawyers ask for a few grand to do fuck all. didn't even try to get the bullshit obstruction charge dropped. Went straight for the plea. Lazy bastard
All my character are extentions/aspects of myself.
My scheming & arrogance becomes a vampire lawyer
My hope, righteousness & honorable nature become a Paladin
My "fuck yeah!" becomes a scifi soldier
If I mix my paranoid scheme & my righteousness I get an Inquisitor type.
My vampire lawyer isn't going to face check a door & blast things like my sci-fi soldier, & my Paladin isn't going to be paranoid of others, he takes things at face value most of the time. None of them are all of me, but all of them are parts of me.
In my opinion this is the smartest way to role play since no one at my table is an actor, & even actors are typecast.
Was kind of the initial plan.
Ended up at the party leader so far.
Wasn't my intention.
But it sort of just happened.
His back story is he came back from war with trauma. Refused to deal with it then He lost his temper and Killed his brother
Got banished from his village.
And now he works as muscle for hire protecting caravans.
We're only 3 sessions deep.
I might have to stick it out.
Nothing worth doing is easy