Successfully threatened a captured Spetsnaz Operative to tell us everything he knew or else I'd have my groups gorilla rape him.
In actuality, it was our face in a gorilla suit. He rolled so well on his performance check that the big badass Russian dude nearly shit himself out of fear. Now we're closer to finding Wonder Woman, locating the stolen art, and tracking down Dr. Moreau.
How was your gamenight, Smar/tg/uys?
gorillas have tiny dicks tho
He didn't know that.
It'd still be very gay
>bluff on gorilla rape
is that really necessary? Rape by a guy in a gorilla suit vs rape by an actual gorilla?
Well, if you have a plan that doesn't involve anal rape via washed up actor in a monkey suit I'm all ears.
Well, you can't get raped by gorilla. Whereas you can install a giant powerdick in gorilla suit for pittance. Or dress the team nigger and dose him with sex stimulants.
I'm the only black character on my team. And she most certainly does not have a dick.
Get one.
...
Get a dick? Get a male negro? BOTH??
BOTH
The doppelganger made his incredibly high disguise and bluff rolls to convince a suspicious person that he was the person he was impersonating....and then made the stupid mistake of literally teellign the guy what he was thinking while impersonating a rogue. Not suggestions and kind of thinking - literally word for word what he was thinking.
It wouldn't have been so bad if the person he was talking to didn't have actual ranks in dungeoneering.
Shit bro.
I still want the 'statuatory ape' t-shirt
>How was your gamenight
Had the party Minotaur fail a perception test so spectacularly that he wound up getting so lost while trying to locate a specific guard, stationed on a GOT esque Wall (though not made of ice, just stone), he broke into the master if the guards chambers and walked in on him bathing...
This resulted in him being barred from the vicinity of the wall. (system has rules for varying degrees of failure in skill checks, he rolled the second worst possible level of failure... Only step worse is death grudge)
This later proved useful for my devious plans, as in this setting there is a form of magical mind altering corruption that this particular Minotaur PC can detect (its an automatic thing, described as their throat suddenly drying out) and the guard captain got corrupted after the above event, but the party suspects nothing because the Minotaur didn't detect anything during his intrusion, and hasn't been near since.
well, after getting shipwrecked on the river shore, the party made their way downstream in the hopes of finding a village: the party only came across some river raiders and failed at being sneaky, prompting the raiders to get up and get armed and pursue them for a minute, eventually semi-encircling the party. After slaughtering them, the party is approached by another armed group that during the fight had intervened in the raider's camp and had attacked them from behind, killing the ones that had gone back to the camp during the fight.
The group talks with this mercenary band of scruffy-looking ronins: the leader is a mountain of a man in heavy armor who gives off danger vibes to the most perceptive party member. The ronin leader offers the party to bring them to the next village, but the party refuses politely, citing the need to find the merchant responsible for the ship sinking.
After the mercenary-looking ronins strip-loot the joint of useful things, the party is left alone and helps the ronin who can work wood repair one of the boats left on the shore to make it serviceable: thanks to astoundingly good rolls (even with the penalties), the party made the boat strong enough to carry them part of the way. (We think)
During the night, however, the party is beset by four of the mercenary ronins who had previously left and had probably come back to take the party's stuff. In a blind battle (there was no light at all and the sky was covered, too) the party murderizes the would-be killers, except for one who ran away into the forest, with the ex-monkey of the party in pursuit. The session ended when the PC had just caught up with the guy.
My god that's as retarded as it is amazing. Gotta love PC plans.
Is that supposed to be Vixen?
Good old dental torture. Works better than a bunch of clowns with a cucklefuck in a fursuit.
The tongue is pehss-nazz. That'd be light hazing for him and free dental on homecoming.
Hey, let that be whoever gets you rocking.
You know nothing.
I knew two freeze-heads, ex-Alpha and ex-SGRU field ops, even picked some lingo. No sense of pain, no fear, little sense in general. They're pretty much one step from being nominated for Darwin - that is, too smart to get themselves killed.
Mind, any pain or even a threat of such will work on OMON, VDV, Guard and the like, as they are trash, wimps, only looking tough in numbers on camera. When someone pulls a gun on them they wet and shit themselves.
bump