Which primarch would you vote for Veeky Forums, And what party would they run for?

>voting
>primarchs

I'm not sure you've understood the setting

Pre-Heresy Fulgrim could probably give him a run for his money.
And Horus, of course.

Maybe Dorn, but he's a bit blunt, and can't lie at all so he'd probably not be a good choice.

Bernie Sanders and Alpharius 2020! I want change baby!

but he would make it work

>implying Alpharius isn't Jeb!
He's playing the long game
You'll see

Alpharius. The party? Whatever suits his current goals. Ultimately fluid politically, near universal support for obvious reasons.

Fulgrim was even better than Guilliman at logistics and more charismatic. He was able to unite his planet simply be being extremely efficient. Best options for an actual politician
1. Guilliman (he is simply more stable than Fulgrim, more human, and less prone to take offense)
2. Fulgrim
3. Dorn (he is straight forward and honest, I can't see him being a politician but if he was I feel like he would be a good one)
...
18. Lion (autism incarnate he would probably inadvertently cause a military coup)
19. Alpharius (he doesn't even know what his own plans are, is easily manipulated by others, and has an unwarranted sense of self importance)
20. Russ (a dangerous retard who would probably start a world war over a misunderstanding)

Samus for the ass

>who isn't the dumbest one
magnus is arguably a contender for dumbest one of the lot

Going by what he did on his old planet, Fulgrim's solution to international conflicts seems to be marrying people's daughters while subtly arranging for some 'tragic accidents' to happen to those who refuse to bow to him while also doing some public works and beautification projects to please the masses.

Nah, Alpharius would get his intelligence agencies in a mess, and his schemes would mean little gets done as there's a shit-ton of inter-service rivalry, except for "rebellions" that allow him to increase his hold on power - but with all that he'd be a competent leader, just an asshole one.

Curze, Angron and Russ would be the worst three - Russ has quite a few admirable qualities, but in any leadership position he's still a barbarian king.

hy·po·thet·i·cal
ˌhīpəˈTHedək(ə)l/Submit
adjective
1.
of, based on, or serving as a hypothesis.
"that option is merely hypothetical at this juncture"
noun
noun: hypothetical; plural noun: hypotheticals
1.
a hypothetical proposition or statement.
"Finn talked in hypotheticals, tossing what-if scenarios to Rosen"

All the primarchs would be either communist or fascist simply due to the purpose of their creation, unless we're going with real-life equivalents in which case I would assume Dorn to be an Ayn Rand protagonist.

Guilliman with Sanguinius for vice president.

There would be no need for parties with such perfect president/vp combo.

Pre-bitterness Perturabo. Make Earth Iron Again!

and?
compare Pinochet's Chile and Pol-Pot's Cambodia

I forgot, was Curze AnCap or Fascist? He did insist on enforcing every single regulation himself, but there's no way he could have controlled the entire planet through brutal violence alone.

He's inexplicably dumb but Russ and Angron insures that no one will ever take the dumbest trophy from them.

I'm never really sure how that worked either, he'd need to have built up some form of predecessors to the Terror Squads to make sure the guys on another continent wouldn't just carry on regardless. In fact, I think I'm going to have that as head canon for my Terror Assault list, they were enforcers way back in the original Nostraman Public Morality Encouragement programme, and think that Curze is a 100% good boy who dindu nuffin. Kinda like hardline Sahaal, rather than idiots like Krukesh who are lol chaotic evil or Sevatar, who is just self-aware while still thinking he's a terrible person.

Magnus or girlyman, since they had the nicest planets

His planet was a dying shithole when he arrived. When Fulgrim landed the standard practice was to kill orphans as they lacked the resources to support them. Fulgrim made their mines and factories efficient enough for the planet to not be a shithole.

With Curze and Angron you know 100% what you are getting into and they wouldn't be able to get anything done. Russ is like Trump if Trump had a disturbing obsession with wolves and a hatred of magic. Alpharius is too easily manipulated, all he needs is someone to tell him "the world would be better off after a nuclear war" and he will instigate a nuclear war with Russia to kill off 99% of humanity.

>guys which primarch is most like Sparkle Farts the magic horse girl

pert

fun is heresy

It's not fair to use Angron as a measure of intelligence.

Now hang on. If Angron had landed ANYWHERE else he would have been fine.

>Maybe Dorn, but he's a bit blunt, and can't lie at all so he'd probably not be a good choice.
Are you kidding me? Dorn WOULD build a wall.

...

...

I would go for Vulkan, at least he's some i could trust and has the interest of the people at hearth, even if he isn't the best

It appears intellectually but then ruins everything because it's dumb?

delete this.. obama is the emperor

People always forgetting about my boy Corax who grew up in a prison for political dissidents and ended up nuking the tyrannical oppressors. He's got the chops to do what's gotta be done.

Fulgrim.

my vote goes to the Khan, leader of the party that pretty much just leaves its citizens alone unless they need something.

...so I guess the Green Party?

Rowboat is almost cheating to name because he's too perfect a candidate. Political feelings aside I am not the only one that sees Mike Pence looking like Guilliman from that beige sketch brought to life, right? Face-wise it's a perfect match.

Socialist, not communist. There's nothing communist about Vulkan's people. They're just textbook scandinavian national socialism without any of the whole Nazi business.

I think Dorne gets likened to Abe Lincoln for some reason but the dude is far too stoic and uncompromising. For lack of a historical example leaping out at me he's Stannis the Mannis Baratheon. And if you want an example of what an autistic uncompromising man of iron is in a leadership position, may I present to you the Emperor. And while I would follow Big-E let's not pretend he's not exactly the best choice for a leader.

Also I disagree about Lion. He's simply Nixonian style secretive and distrusting. He wouldn't cause a military coup. He would however be unable to get anything done in a system that wasn't rubber-stamp legislature presidency.

100% on Russ. Dumb yippy puppy would go to war with whoever his advisors told him too.

Angron should be discounted due to the nails. It's like arguing someone with the downs is the dumbest of the lot. I mean it's true but it's also like saying a horse with no legs is the slowest horse.

>Comparing Iron father to fatfuckboy the retarded nuke midget

Fuck you and everything you stand for this is the second worst day after the space yiffs burnt Prospero.

>Compares selfless heroic Vulkan to Sharpton

LOOKS LIKE IM JOINING THE WORLD EATERS BOIZ

Trump had a big golf umbrella and used it shield himself whilst making his son walk behind him in the full blast of the rain - whilst the Emperor is about self sacrifice
I’m pretty sure the emperor didn’t get magical bone spurs to dodge the draft
dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5273011/amp/Trump-holds-umbrella-self-boards-Air-Force-One.html

One had a kill tally three orders of magnitude higher than the other and the state they left their respective countries in is night and day?

Sanguinius

Lost it at Vulkan

>Dumb yippy puppy would go to war with whoever his advisors told him too.
You do realise that was the Imperium's foreign policy even when Emps was in charge.

Khan.

>Implying the Emperor didn't make it his personal goal in the Crusade to fuck over his sons in every way possible
Maybe I'm just a bitter manlet, but Trump would appear as a humanistic and heroic saviour standing next to the Emperor and his assholery.

Vulkan of course, candidate of the green party for socialism and legal pyromania!

But he didn't.

>Russ is like Trump
PLEASE elaborate, i am genuinely curious how the fuck did you come to this comparison.

People always forget Corax in any Primarch discussion when ironically he's top 5 (or close) when it comes to almost anything, leadership, tactics/strategy, intelligence, fighting skill, compassion.

>but the dude is far too stoic and uncompromising.
So Abe Lincoln? Abe Lincoln only cared about preserving the union, he would never compromise on that. He suspended habeus corpus and only did the Emancipation Proclamation as a way to punish the rebel states while preserving the loyalty of slave states within the union.

>someone actually dared comparing obama to the emperor
I know the emperor is a complete tyrant and everything, but one of these things is not like the other. It's a bit like comparing particularly nasty bacteria with a lion.

Perturabo before Olympia and/or before bitterness
His idea of life would be pretty nice

Yeah he'd have my vote. Would clean out the corrupt politicians. I guess Curze would be the more fun choice though.

>complete tyrant
In the sense that a parent snatching bleach out of his child's hands which causes it to cry rather then pleading with it and hoping it doesn't drink it is, sure.

Perturabo was literally always a bitter autist. He pushed everyone around him away and then got salty no one wanted to be close to him, i mean how fucking retarded can you get?

>created the night lords
>eradicated all religions
>isn't a complete tyrant
Fine, but what would it take, then ?

>Most hive criminals so horrible and depraved Night Lords were a perfectly justified response
>religions the main cause of disunity AND fuel for Chaos Gods
Him actually being a tyrant? Him being out for His own gain or glorification rather then desperately doing everything He can to pull humanity from the brink of an endless abyss it is not even aware exists because the very knowledge would push it in? The Emperor's ultimate redeeming quality is that He is completely selfless in His crusade to protect mankind and every move He makes is what He believes to be the best course of action for that goal.

>people who actually capitalize the emperor's pronouns
You're one piece of autistic embarrassment. And this is coming from an aspie.
>>Most hive criminals so horrible and depraved Night Lords were a perfectly justified response
Torture is never justified (don't try it). The likes of the World Eaters would be more than enough.
>religions the main cause of disunity AND fuel for Chaos Gods
That's an immature view of religion, whose normal purpose is generating order. Religion can be a very difficult tool to use indeed, and the emperor just couldn't do it.
>every move He makes is what He believes to be the best course of action for that goal.
So it's no beliefs except his own, then ?

>leadership, fighting skill,
He fucked off half his legion because they liked Horus and because they were too mean, despite himself being a nuke-using terrorist.
And when it comes to personal prowess he's got one of the least impressive records - arguably the weakest on the Loyalist side.
He's a good tactician, I suppose, but there's many who are better - Horus, Dorn, Mortarion, Guilliman, the Lion, at least.

>being triggered over someone's writing on Veeky Forums
The absolute state of (you).
>Torture is never justified
Except in a scenario where knowledge that could potentially save lives is being intentionally withheld. Or to punish depraved criminals in an environment where prison and the death penalty clearly have no effect. Whoops, two examples right off the bat. Winning a war is also a good one, if that war decides the fate of your species.
>(don't try it)
I just did, easily too.
>The likes of the World Eaters would be more than enough.
>''Hey, torturing a bunch of depraved monsters is bad!''
>''Instead, let these bloodthirsty lunatics slaughter entire populations of planets''
>That's an immature view of religion
I'm religious myself, so no real horse in this race. But The Emperor was right to abhor it, not only did He witness it causing untold death and atrocities, it's actually one of the main sources of power for the Chaos Gods.
>So it's no beliefs except his own, then ?
I never argued He was faultess. After living for 40+ millennia and having greater knowledge and power then any entity anywhere, He got detached from humanity and developed an ''I know best'' belief, which wasn't actually wrong, since no one actually knew better. It was merely incomplete, since He didn't know EVERYTHING.

His achievements and personality are often lost behind the perception of him as one big emo meme.

Trick question, I vote for Malcador.

>realized Horus was grinding down his legion and used that opportunity to kill off all potential traitors while elevating his truly loyal sons
Totally not a genius move.
>And when it comes to personal prowess he's got one of the least impressive records - arguably the weakest on the Loyalist side.
Didn't he come out second in the Primarch wrestling contest or something? Also, he actually BEAT a Primarch, unlike Leman ''get my ass handed to me by a JUST'D Magnus only to have my wolves bail me out and Tzeentch guide my lucky strike'' Russ.
>but there's many who are better
He's supreme at what he does, and that happened to be VERY important as it slowed Horus' advance and gave Dorn enough time to prepare Terra for the Siege.

>Malcador only person in the galaxy not afraid to call Big E out on his shit to his face
>Big E valued that (among his MYRAID other qualities) so much he made him his right hand man
Malcador is so fucking based.

>He fucked off half his legion because they liked Horus and because they were too mean

Not really his fault, they were soldiers wand as such should have been able to accept a change in commanding officer.

>And when it comes to personal prowess he's got one of the least impressive records - arguably the weakest on the Loyalist side.

>He's a good tactician, I suppose,but there's many who are better

Sure there were many better at 'open field' warfare, but aside from maybe Alpharius no one could do guerrilla warfare like Corax. In the HH where Loyalist infrastructure was utterly fucked by warp storms and they were working with greatly reduced numbers, or in the Great Crusade when they were operating in very poorly connected sectors that level of skill and experience would have invaluable.

I told you not to try it, but you just had to try it. Mindless fool. No life deserves the repugnant, unbearable burden of owing itself to an act of torture. Literally never. I hope you don't really understand what you're saying. You have no idea what torture is. Better to live and die with at least a shred of humanity left than live and die after having discarded it all, that's one of the many lessons of religion, one you apparently haven't understood just yet. Also if you believe in God, then it is up to Him to torment the damned, not up to humans. Or perhaps you doubt His justice or that He exists and just want to be reassured and make sure that the criminal suffers tremendously ? I believe in Hell, and that's why I'd have no problem just putting a bullet through a criminal's skull.
>>''Instead, let these bloodthirsty lunatics slaughter entire populations of planets''
Before Angron, when they were calmer, more level-headed. Or, you know, the Iron Hands, or whatever. I said they were more than enough for a reason.
>I'm religious myself
Capitalizing the emperor's pronouns, ie treating him as a god, even jokingly, is a sin and I hope you understand that.
>not only did He witness it causing untold death and atrocities, it's actually one of the main sources of power for the Chaos Gods.
I admitted that it can be a very difficult tool to properly use. It just means that the emperor is not skilled enough with religion to use it effectively against chaos.
>greater knowledge and power then any entity anywhere
So you don't believe that God is in the 40k universe ? If you do, that means the 40k universe is literally, and I do mean literally, (unlike all those people who misuse the word literally) Hell.

>No life deserves the repugnant, unbearable burden of owing itself to an act of torture.
I'm pretty sure that's up to the person(s) in question to decide. I'd have no problem living my life knowing that a terrorist who planted a bomb or a maniac who kidnapped me was tortured to save me.
>Better to live and die with at least a shred of humanity left than live and die after having discarded it all, that's one of the many lessons of religion, one you apparently haven't understood just yet.
If someone is capable of thinking like this, yet they still chose to dirty themselves so they could save others/protect future generations, are they not martyrs?
>Also if you believe in God, then it is up to Him to torment the damned, not up to humans.
I don't know what God you believe in, but it is the ABSENCE of God that torments the damned. God gave people a choice to accept Him or not, but renouncing Him (by committing evil and not truly repenting, thereby damning oneself) is giving oneself over to the devil willingly. Because God will not force someone to be saved.
>Or perhaps you doubt His justice or that He exists and just want to be reassured and make sure that the criminal suffers tremendously ?
You'll notice i never mentioned torture for the sake of punishment. Everything is for PREVENTING tragedy, not avenging it. There should be a balance between faith and pragmatism. If torture is the ONLY method that keeps the absurd crime rate down, then it is also a moral choice. These aren't your average muggers either, every one of them was at least a violent killer or worse.
> I said they were more than enough for a reason.
Evidently not, as The Night Lords (before they went completely insane) had their hands full and then some.
>Capitalizing the emperor's pronouns, ie treating him as a god, even jokingly, is a sin and I hope you understand that.
I'm pretty sure God cares more about what's in my heart then what i write on anime image boards.

cont.

>
>It just means that the emperor is not skilled enough with religion to use it effectively against chaos.
The only choice would have been for Emps to claim he's god, and that went against everything the man stood for.
>So you don't believe that God is in the 40k universe?
All evidence points to this, yes. Either that or He's cruel/uncaring.
>If you do, that means the 40k universe is literally, and I do mean literally, (unlike all those people who misuse the word literally) Hell.
Well, it IS the setting where literally every horrible fate imaginable up to and including eternal damnation can befall you, and it invented the word grimdark, so you're not far off there.

>That pic.

Kek

>I'd have no problem living my life knowing that a terrorist who planted a bomb or a maniac who kidnapped me was tortured to save me.
Then we have nothing in common.
>If someone is capable of thinking like this, yet they still chose to dirty themselves so they could save others/protect future generations, are they not martyrs?
Martyrdom is pure and unsullied. The martyr can be the one being tortured, never the one doing the torturing.
>I don't know what God you believe in, but it is the ABSENCE of God that torments the damned. God gave people a choice to accept Him or not, but renouncing Him (by committing evil and not truly repenting, thereby damning oneself) is giving oneself over to the devil willingly. Because God will not force someone to be saved.
You know what I meant. Also debatable (Psalm 139:8, Hebrews 12:29) but that's a finer point of theology I won't claim to be a master of.
>I'm pretty sure God cares more about what's in my heart then what i write on anime image boards.
Why not try to be perfect as it is said in the Bible ? That's what being perfect means, caring about everything you do, having scrupulousness. How you formulate things influences your thinking, actually, even if you don't perceive it.
>The only choice would have been for Emps to claim he's god, and that went against everything the man stood for.
Actually I think the emperor makes a rather fitting antichrist. You know all those people who say suffering feeds demons etc ? Well the emperor, acting as a saviour while actively denying God, posing as the sole source of hope in a perpetually suffering galaxy, might be a pretty decent false messiah in that he prevents true hope from arising.

Why argue with an obvious self-righteous cretin, user?

Holy shit. Top Kek. Someone sceencap this.

>Then we have nothing in common.
You'd honestly rather die to some psychopath then know he suffered for wanting to kill you (and probably killing others before) in the first place?
>Martyrdom is pure and unsullied. The martyr can be the one being tortured, never the one doing the torturing.
Fair enough.
>You know what I meant.
Really didn't like the wording. God is love. What point would out choice have if He punished us for making the wrong one?
>Why not try to be perfect as it is said in the Bible ? That's what being perfect means, caring about everything you do, having scrupulousness. How you formulate things influences your thinking, actually, even if you don't perceive it.
Again, fair enough. I do keep the Golden Calf in mind whenever i think about The Emperor, however, so i do agree with you to some extent. To me he is simply a tragic hero and a great man. Which is why i never call him The GOD Emperor, as that is spitting on his own ideals before anything else.
>Actually I think the emperor makes a rather fitting antichrist. You know all those people who say suffering feeds demons etc ? Well the emperor, acting as a saviour while actively denying God, posing as the sole source of hope in a perpetually suffering galaxy, might be a pretty decent false messiah in that he prevents true hope from arising.
A good theory, the problem is God, at least as we perceive Him, doesn't exist in 40k. Emperor is truly the only hope.

I'm an obvious self-righteous cretin because I refuse torture ? What delightful times I'm living in...You must surely be a great individual, with very interesting things to say to people, and totally not insufferable to others in your day-to-day life.

I don't necessarily see him as such. The part that no one deserves torture alone separates him from the regular ''holier then thou'' crowd, and it's healthy to exchange beliefs/opinions with those of contradicting views (provided they're not obviously trolling)

>You'd honestly rather die to some psychopath then know he suffered for wanting to kill you (and probably killing others before) in the first place?
Yes I would gladly. Not "suffered" though, being tortured, huge difference.

'er you go. Please meme responsibility.

>Not really his fault, they were soldiers wand as such should have been able to accept a change in commanding officer.

Absolutely his fault- they completely and unequivocally accepted him as their father. Then he used them as cannon-fodder and then banished the survivors, including Arkhas Fal, the dude who had led his legion before he was found, into the depths of space with orders not to return. We don't know HOW many of them he sent off to die alone and without any support, but it had to be at least a few thousand since millennia later a chapter sized showed back up as the Space Sharks, still wandering the deep void and scavening for supplies as per Corvus' orders.

Not to mention that "potential traitors" stuff is horseshit- at that time the idea of inter-Astartes rebellion was pretty far fetched, and the Terran born marines (like the entire pre-discovery-of-Corvus Raven Guard) were disproportionately loyal, even among the Sons of Horus.

tldr Corvus Corax is a bad father and a wasteful commander on par with "decimate my legion" Perturabo.

Has a lot of swaggering, common man charisma but is kind of a dumbass, actual content of his speech is sort of terrible but has the force of personality to make it seem like something.

Rogal Dorn
Build that wall!

Guilliman is honestly the best answer, save maybe Fulgrim or Sanguinius. Honourable mention to Vulkan because of the "not forgetting the little guy" aspect, but at times you do need to set aside the little guy.

Alpharius would be fucking hilarious as a choice though.

Dorn because he'd actually build a wall.

>Dorn builds the border wall
>Then builds another border wall
>Then another
>Then another on the Canadian Border
>Then one between each state
>Then one between each county
>Tops each wall with rows of battlements and turret emplacements
>"It saddens me to create such armored eyesores, but this country must be FORTIFIED."