Favorite spells

Shit taste. Early levels you should support (any buff on barb would return more than MM ever could) and area cripple/denial, late levels it's pretty useless.

I'm not here to oil down some barb's nutsack

Protection from missiles, especially on armor.

Know what happens to a frogposter when it gets hit by a lightning spell?

Same thing as her career?

Let him fight, it's his job to wipe the rabble. It isn't yours, unless you're eldritch knight or fighter/mage. Now that you've mentioned oil, if you're not willing to buff, one Grease does more good than all MMs, few that they are, you can sling and remains relevant forever. Sleep is awesome as well while your enemies are low-level and not immune to it.

Sticks to Snakes.

Fist

Played a cleirc once and talked my DM into giving me a cantrip that cured minor ailments like sore throats common colds tooth aches etc. Had good back and forth with DM playing doctor.

They absorb the lightning and convert it to vril, which they use to psychically crumple Mossad deepwater submarines.

5E cantrips? That's broken as fuck.
Also, curing tooth aches or curing actual tooth damage that provides them? A world of difference.

Silence, or Blindness / Deafness. The former is something your party members will love, the latter just fucks someone up for the rest of his life.

It didnt cure any damage, it was pretty much all flavor.

>being this autistic

That'd do more harm than good, then. Still, pretty nifty for anaesthesia. How long it lasts?
Being a grandchild to a dentist does this to you.

Misty Step, although Thunder Step from Xanathar's is basically it on steroids, purely because it's anime as hell.
I really like Phantasmal Force and Detect Thoughts as well, what's the point in being a wizard if you can't mind-rape people for shits and giggles.

Scry.
Arcane Sight.
Mind Probe.

Basically all divination/information gathering spells.

Do you hate lead and arbitrary yet stone set limitations too?

Not at all. I feel there needs to be some limitations to spells like that- arbitrary or not, it means that someone can make a concerted effort to protect themselves from those kinds of spells.

What pisses me off is when antagonists still know everything about you, especially when you've been making those kinds of efforts.

Fireball.

This is because I've always preferred the mage to be the walking artillery, rather than the problem-solver with a convenient spell for every occasion who literally controls the game's narrative. It's also because there are just so many ways to flavour fireball:
>The Classic: a grape-sized bead of seething crackling fiery energy that streaks to the target area, then explodes, sending flames washing over everything
>several small orbs that scatter around the area before exploding
>an orb the size of a man's head that flies above the area, then explodes, raining down fiery darts over the area
>an orb that flies to the center of the area then explodes, sending a spray of fiery darts outward
>a flaming skull rising up from the ground and closing its jaws on the area, swallowing everything
>a massive fiery hand closing into a fist before bursting
>a massive fiery fist slamming down on the area from above
>a spectral dragon's head appearing and exhaling fire on the area
>a magic circle that appears in the area of effect, causing flames to erupt from below

There are so many fun ways to do it!

It seems the situation is reversed on my side.
DM always noselling my entire school (except on goblins and other trash, but why would I scry trash) pisses me off to no end. It got to the point of no point in picking divination at all, and by their shitty rules I cannot drop it either.
>antagonists still know everything about you
They would. Detecting scrying is easy. Usual party makes waves and hides no intent. After that it's a matter of applying the resources which your enemies seldom lack. It's pretty hard to fly under radar when most of your party's, any but all-rogue party really, rambunctious and bombastic by design.

Web is an old favorite of mine. Especially if you set it up between walls. Combine with Grease and you have something astonishingly annoying.

Also, my wizards almost never leave their homes without Knock. Rogues may do their things, but sometimes it's not enough.

Oh, and Shatter is an old favorite, too. Nothing like causing environmental hazards to opponents.

Silent Image. I love this spell because it's uses are only limited by your imagination. Need to distract the enemy? Make an image of a horrific monster lying in ambush. Want to reuse a pit trap? Make an illusory floor over top of it. Need to hide in an empty room? Make an illusory pile of empty crates in front of you. Want the enemy to knock over a pyramid of delicately arranged vials of alchemist's fire? Make an illusory mound of gold.

Dimension door.

It's super fucking convenient

Tenser's floating disk. Cast all day, every day. Never walk, always float.

Yeah, great spells. Glitterdust also works neatly for similar purpose.
Get chimes or put Knock on an item. Stack if low-level, infinite uses if high, but even scrolls will do. There's no point in memorising it.

grease
duh

Cast once, it has duration of hour/level, which means at any decent level it would be going longer than you are. Also convenient to avoid traps, dirtying your feet and tiring yourself walking anywhere, and you can mock the rest of your party trudging to their neck in swamp or some other kind of shit.

It also makes for an immovable, if always horizontal shield or charge-breaker, large cargo hauler, and cast/activated by the character whose natural speed is outstanding (or your flying familiar) allows you to shuttle your whole party without care for dangerous terrain from the one end of the continent to another.

>The disk is immobile while you are within 20 feet of it
>never walk
how?

fuck off grease fags, literally how is this spell cool at all fuck you i hate grease

Planar Binding

Turns Monster Manuals into what feel like actual spell-books, searching for the most unusual, underrated monsters to bind to your will. Feels like it actually rewards you for behaving like an actual Wizard. Not to mention the roleplay potential, the preparation required that you can invest resources into, the fact that it's the most similar to "real" magic D&D gets.

And on top of that it's brokenly powerful. Best spell ever.

I've always thought Sorcerers should be blasters and Wizards should be ritualists myself.

Mighty Fortress.

Just the thought of using magic to summon a fuckhueg fortress from the ground is so cool to me.

Derail Plot. Best spell.

Polymorph(slut)

I actually have created a Polymorph Other spell that doesn't just turn enemies into boring woodland creatures, but properly vengeful stuff. Like an Ooze, or a bimbo.

tongueonwifesassus

Prestidigitation. Its justvso unreasonably useful.

What's with you?

It can move any way you want it to, with the following exceptions: it can't move faster than the caster's natural speed, it can't tilt, it can't rise higher than 3ft from the surface (but you can stack disk s in a tower, if you want), it can't move outside the range(25ft. + 2.5ft/ level). If you try to do any of that, it winks out, but otherwise it's completely inviolable, barring dispel or running its duration.
Best slowing spell in the whole game, massive area, no resistance, reflex+balance threat, even if they pass that they're still flat-footed and challenged again, at flat-footed, if you do anything, even if your wizard farts in their general direction, perfectly scales with level and synergizes with other spells, lets your rogues sneak attack with impunity, is Conjuration. What else do you want?

Avasculate.

It's not in 5e and for good reason. It was broken as fuck.

There is a version of grease which is flammable I think, at the same level.

And watch your crossbow shatter?

Eh, by 3.5 standards it's pretty reasonable.

Druids have like a level 2 or 3 spell which blinds without a save with a ranged touch attack. That's far more deadly. Shivering Touch is a melee touch attack spell that drains 3d6 dex damage, no save, and is level 3.

There is also like, Control Winds, which pretty much a level after you get it can create tornado force winds enough to destroy cities.

Negen/necromancy immunity fucks up your day bud.
It's awesome as it is , considering that almost all other spells either subject to shitty restrictions or were nerfed unto the ground.

Oh I agree, I think Grease is a perfect spell in terms of design, but that ethos wasn't carried through with every spell.

If Melf's Acid Arrow was designed like Grease it would be much more interesting (and complicated).

I was just pointing out that making Grease also flammable for the same level is crazy. I think the "balance" was shorter duration or area.

What kind of an argument is this? Every spell has some kind of counter. If the target is not affected by necromancy... don't use a necromancy spell on it. You wouldn't try a touch spell on a flying monster, would you?

Goddamn Veeky Forums is acoustic.

>It can move any way you want it to
That's not what the spell says. Doesn't mention you moving it by will or with an action. Just says it follows you

Raw HP damage is the actually the worst use of a spell in 3.5, by design terms. Creatures can heal themselves, and if you're having issues even harming the thing, getting rid of half its health won't make it any easier to kill.

Like, compare removing half the health of something that your other attacks/PCs aren't even able to hurt, and doing something like turning the Barbarian into a Hydra, or making the creature unable to see.

Honestly, it's not a terrible spell by any means, but it's certainly less powerful than other level 7 options.

Power Word Blind is better. You've made the particular creature much less dangerous, much easier to hurt - without a save. Reverse Gravity would also be more useful, it also doesn't have a save. That's just PHB stuff at a very crappy level for selection.

Avasculate looks flashy but honestly it's not very good even if they fail a save. 1 round of stunning compared to.. literally the creature being dead? It sucks every single time they fail the save, because you'll wonder what sort of insane hijinx you could have had if you'd picked something else.

I liked it more for the RP visuals. The dude becomes an anime-style fountain of blood. Shit's hilarious.

Consider that any intelligent character (any intelligent monster as well) is either immune to it, bears an item that makes him immune to it, or is a lich or some other kind of immortal, and, again, immune to it.

I liked necromancy once. Then I've learned that the Cleric is a better Necromancer than any kitted/prestiged/specialized mage could ever be, that vital tools for necromancer are solely Cleric's privilege, and one he isn't even using, that my offensive spells either not work at all or easily resisted, and that I have to wait for the eight SL to get shittier Turn knock-off that barely even works.

Do something nice for your DM, user.

>If not otherwise directed

Fuck my DM. He stopped our random cave spelunking by blocking off one path with a fucking vermiurge. You know, the god bugs from the ELH?

Oh for sure. I like the horrible Fort.or "die" spells in 3.5. Try the Book of Vile Darkness has even more outlandish aesthetic Necromancy and Corrupt spells.

I like Dancing Chains for the Cenobite flava

Play Vampire the Masquerade as Tremere. They're vampire wizards, basically. Bloody carnage in all senses is their trade, art and weapon.

I would think Chimes are actually quite rare honestly. What kind of a wizard would make an item that can be used to ransack their tower?

Did you eat it?

What's more offensive is that they had two extra attempts to fix that problem and still fucked it up.

Best Necromancy spells is Magic Jar.

No. We were all level thirteen. It would have pushed our shit in. He was abusing DM fiat to stop us from getting a legendary homebrew weapon. Unfortunately the campaign didn't last long enough for us to become strong enough to challenge it.

A wizard wouldn't rely on ANYTHING that can be unlocked/disabled, nay, interacted with in any way besides dying by a rogue, my boy. If he has any brains, that is.

Spiritual Weapon, I cast it literally every fight.
>deals force damage
>can be cast at higher levels to keep up with high CR encounters
>has a duration of 1 minute (10 rounds)
>effectively gives your Cleric 2 attacks at the cost of your bonus action
>decent range, can move 20ft per round
>NO CONCENTRATION REQUIRED BIIIAAAAATTTTCCCCCHHHHHH
Basically no reason to ever not use it.

It only activates when touched by a creature, so load it, cast it, shoot it, and watch it work

The only reason I would think a wizard would make chimes is to distribute them to their underlings. And at this level, they have some sort of permanent illusion hiding the hideout from prying adventurers.

If weapon was legendary in its power, then surely it would've been guarded by a legendary monster.

I'm honestly not sure how strong we would have had to be. I didn't know what it was at the time so I later looked it up. The damn thing has a CR of, like, 30, and is constantly surrounded by a bug swarm that you probably couldn't survive in for very long.

I love magic missile because finger guns

Not sure which version, you're describing, but the 3.5 one gets your BAB. Which is crazy good.

Disguise Self, Hunger of Hadar, Animate Objects.

I'm playing a warlock at the moment. Armor of Agathys is proving to be pretty helpful.

This is the flavor text I got:
>This spell creates a circular, horizontal plane of force, 3 feet in diameter and 1 inch thick, that floats 3 feet above the ground in an unoccupied space of your choice that you can see within range. The disk remains for the duration, and can hold up to 500 pounds. If more weight is placed on it, the spell ends, and everything on the disk falls to the ground.
>The disk is immobile while you are within 20 feet of it. If you move more than 20 feet away from it, the disk follows you so that it remains within 20 feet of you. It can more across uneven terrain, up or down stairs, slopes and the like, but it can't cross an elevation change of 10 feet or more. For example, the disk can't move across a 10-foot-deep pit, nor could it leave such a pit if it was created at the bottom.

I really don't think you can use it as a hoverboard, although I like the idea and would probably allow it in my game.

You don't want anything of yours be protected by something a rogue can bypass, so selling chimes to enterprising adventurers that would rather kill a rogue than employ one Is a perfect business idea. Once I retired I made a shop peddling such very handy items to discriminating customers and it was great success.
24. You could reliably kill it as middling conjurer or transmuter in a Cleric/Druid party. Or simply Gate it the fuck away or Gate something in to kill it.

For a couple of different systems:

Animate Dead

Magic of the Smith

Gifts Ungiven

Flame Katana

Seven league stride

Detect Life

Cr Ig

Yeah, it pretty plainly states that it won't move if you're within 20 feet of it. It really should be able to be ridden, though.

Different edition, I assume.
It is the spell primary purpose. Carrying you junk comes long after you can waste two slots to make two of those.
>You create a slightly concave, circular plane of force that follows you about and carries loads for you. The disk is 3 feet in diameter and 1 inch deep at its center. It can hold 100 pounds of weight per caster level. (If used to transport a liquid, its capacity is 2 gallons.)
>The disk floats approximately 3 feet above the ground at all times and remains level. It floats along horizontally within spell range and will accompany you at a rate of no more than your normal speed each round. If not otherwise directed, it maintains a constant interval of 5 feet between itself and you. The disk winks out of existence when the spell duration expires.
>The disk also winks out if you move beyond range or try to take the disk more than 3 feet away from the surface beneath it. When the disk winks out, whatever it was supporting falls to the surface beneath it.

>Flesh to ___
BROTHER

>casting Grease as a 9th-level spell
youtube.com/watch?v=S_XFSuw17Rg

Ah, yes, just another reason why 5E is shit.

The weight is illusory, so the crossbow will be fine

I made a nice garden of defeated foes, if they were particularly challenging or aesthetically pleasing. Also the furniture, but that had to be made of - with some difficulty - caught drow, planetouched and half-dragons, as you have to position them properly before the spell applies, and you can't exactly lounge on the throne made of filthy bugbears and their magical resistance will provide natural challenge to the craft - and, once reinforced, resistance to attempts to undo them. Party thinks I'm crazy, by what do they know?
DM's been taking notes, and that means I'd either face a little insurrection shortly or be the villain of our next campaign.

>Heartclutch
>The caster holds forth his empty hand, and the still-beating heart of the subject appears within it. The subject dies in 1d3 rounds, and only a heal, regenerate, miracle, or wish spell will save it during this time. The target is entitled to a Fortitude saving throw to survive the attack. If the target succeeds at the save, it instead takes 3d6 points of damage +1 point per caster level from general damage to the chest and internal organs. (The target might die from damage even if it succeeds at the saving throw).

Holy shit, Grasp Heart is real?

Heres how i mostly used it
>tell the people of the village or town im in i can perform minor healings
>people line up and tell me whats wrong
>cure colds, head aches, tooth aches, one time a hemroid
>people thank me and somtimes give me a tip
Like i said it didnt cure HP or re-grow limbs. Kinda like mending but on people.

>Grasp Heart
Isn't Overlord actually based on one of the writer's D&D campaigns, or something like that?

He started writing it out of frustration that his group was too busy to play, and the magic system and bestiary and such are based on 3.5e. I just thought Grasp Heart was an original touch, but I'm happy I could cast it. Or, well, if I had anyone to play 3.5 with.

Fuck off, frogposter.

Why do people hate this frog so much?

cure, bless, restoration.

It is a badly drawn forced meme made by most shitty people.