Magic is dead. This is the last fucking nail in the coffin. That's it. I'm quitting this fucking awful game for the last fucking time. I can't believe they fucking did this. Fuck. Just looking at this image makes me angry as hell.
Fuck you, Wizards. Fuck you, Hasbro. Fuck you, MaRo. I'm out and this time, I'm not fucking coming back.
Yeah, me too. I'm fucking sick of the endless pandering "diversity" bullshit. You can just tell that Wizards is full of those rabid intersectionalists when they print things like this. Look, I get that crabs exist, ok? Some of my best friends are crabs. But they don't play the fucking game. Why would you betray your core audience like this when crabs make up less than 10% of the playerbase? You may say "oh, it's only one card", but it's not about the number of cards. It's about the message that's being presented: "This is no longer your game, and if you don't like it, go fuck yourself." I'm selling my collection and buying into Force of Will.
Chase James
>headbutt trees in FireRed ????
Jaxon Jenkins
So... the homarid is triggering you like that? You got lobster issues or something?
Thomas Lee
Homarids are cancerous.
Liam Sullivan
Is that official art/flavour?
Hudson Lee
Yep.
Josiah Butler
is the flavor text a reference to global cooling?
Matthew Turner
I love you
Carson Perez
Ya the they thing is making me want to stop playing. I cannot believe that wizards put virtue signaling over game readability. I might just switch to valves new tcg when it comes out.
Liam Wilson
Craaaaaaab people Craaaaaaab people Taste like crab Talk like people
Liam Reyes
It's a reference to the end of the ice age you dumb ass
Nathan Garcia
>end of of the ice age >"as the climate cooled"
Ayden Gomez
Nice blog post. See you in three months.
Isaac Howard
Yes, cooled back from being frozen. Things can cool in either direction. Look it up.
Even this guy is getting pissed, probably because he knows wotc is going down the drain and his pallets of cardboard will be worthless.
Easton Martinez
Why are we bitching about a crab man? Don't we like Homarids? Is this another situation where we whine about Chupacabra? It's not even the stained-glass half-shave knight, what's the issue?
Very clever.
Alexander Green
Berserker Rudy activated.
And yea he usually stayed out of the politics shit, this is out of character, everyone is seeming to leave except for of course the fat cuck wedge and wotc's plebbit mindslaves that is.
James Robinson
...
Luis Mitchell
Wizards Bankruptcy when?
Isaiah Jenkins
>want good cards >get Homarids instead
You have a point.
Luis Mitchell
...
Isaac Long
before Thanksgiving.
Screencap this, I will not be wrong.
Dylan Taylor
He's pretending to be triggered about the change from >target player puts the top four cards of his or her library into his or her graveyard to >target player puts the top four cards of their library into their graveyard
The hypothetical triggered person he's pretending to be is mad because some people in their outgroup dislike the use of binary masculine/feminine pronouns and advocate for gender-neutral pronouns like "they". But remember that in reality, OP is just fishing for (You)s.
Lucas Anderson
I think it's more telling that the top 8 contestants of the GDS were all men. Obviously WotC has been doing nothing to try and fix representation issues and the toxic masculine environment of their game.
seriously though, how the fuck did a design "CARDNAME deals 1 damage to target creature. Target player sacrifices other target creature." get into a top 8? That templating is atrocious and the idea behind the card is poorly executed
Dylan Watson
Okay then. Not really my table regardless. Have a good thread.
Aaron Torres
>toxic masculine
just by saying such faggotry you've outed yourself, fuck outta here Gabby.
Brayden Howard
I'm saving this as copypasta and posting it for every edition.
Owen Nguyen
That would actually be good promo art for emmy-chan
Mason Murphy
I'm, like, 90% sure that was sarcasm.
Levi Green
Either shitpost or shit for brains
Ryder Flores
You might unironically be retarded.
Speaking of retarded; another great design from a GDS3 top 8: >BR >Instant >CARDNAME deals 2 damage to target creature and its controller. Gain 2 life. Compares favorably to Searing Blood and I would argue Lightning Helix (though I would concede that the Helix comparison is much more ambiguous) but is apparently fine at common for some reason.
Caleb Reyes
I-I'm sorry bro, same shit kind of happened here, we usually have 20, we had 8.
The state of mtg is fucked.
Lucas Evans
The thing is, that even if he's being sarcastic, he's kind of right. WotC can wring their hands and say "we're inclusive" but that's not going to change anything.
Caleb Anderson
I'm and you had better be trolling right now.
WotC is explicitly pandering to the SJW crowd. Maro has gone on record multiple times saying that they are trying to get a 50/50 balance between male and female main characters (which, because of the significant imbalance in earlier sets means they will be printing more female characters than male), are against the sexualization of angels and other fantasy creatures, and Dominara changes 'He or She' to 'They', presumably because 'HURRR GENDER ISN'T BINARY'.
On top of this, the story is including more token lesbians, the Aetherborn were described as 'non-binary' (which is honestly the thing in this post that triggers me the most. Aetherborn are magical entities that don't reproduce, they don't have genders period and shouldn't be touted as 'progressive' just like Myr from way back in 2003 weren't considered progressive for being 'non-binary'), and evil female characters are being retconned to anti-heroes because 'LOL CAN'T PORTRAY WOMEN IN A BAD LIGHT' (Nissa and Liliana being the most egregious examples).
Wizards is being 'inclusive' as fuck. The fact that a contest based solely on merit and design talent just happened to have only males in the top 8 just shows that apparently males are better at Magic game design than females.
Julian Ramirez
Yeah, crabs aside (and they make a fine side dish), I'm keeping a few favorite EDH decks and selling everything else including my MTGO inventory. The complete fail of Masters 25 and my disappointment over Dominaria did it for me. Moving on the tabletop skirmish games.
Camden Nguyen
this nigga gets it
Austin Williams
You have to understand that Magic is a product, and that product is easier to market in under-saturated markets. The 16-30 white shepherd you from the darkness male demographic is saturated with murdered their young Magic fans. Now they move on to other the only beauty in that ethnicities and take care not to fall to far women, who are the metal mother guide your less saturated and more do the fears swell efficient to target with of a goddess advertising.
Joseph Reed
Are you a Mossad bot?
Because MTG is a real goddess of the printing press, and she's furious with your constant meddling.
James Cooper
Kek 7/10
Kevin Sanchez
That pic is fucking amazing, actually fucking amazing. Good job whoever made it.
Josiah Anderson
thalia sauce?
Daniel Young
warm user, the word is warm
Ethan Ramirez
Its a reference to the START of the ice age
Zachary Jones
Okay, can anyone here actually tell me what's so SJW with MTG? The face of MTG are the Gatewatch and they're all white and attractive, even the cat is a whitey. I read comic books, so I see shit like entire characters being replaced with SJW counter-parts and huge press release about it. With MTG, the only time I've seen this shit is when they brought in that black woman to design the generic black planeswalker.
there are black people and women in cards which is communism
Daniel Parker
>'LOL CAN'T PORTRAY WOMEN IN A BAD LIGHT' Hilariously enough, the few feminists I know actually hate shit like this. To them, it's saying that women can only be nice and women can't do evil or violent acts. The only feminists Wizards is pandering too is the radicals, and that's a stupid idea.
Gavin Turner
That's what I thought. It's so bizarre getting pissed at this shit.
Teferi is going to join the Gatewatch and he is black.
But why Magic is actually SJW? Let's consider the Amonkhet. Think about it, the Gatewatch came to the unknown world where native folks have their own traditions, religion and shit, and ruined everything with YOU ARE NOT LIVING YOUR LIFE CORRECTLY. If this it not some heavy SJW shit, I don't know what is.
So spaniards were SJW when they came to america and fucked everything up within the natives since they weren't living life correctly?
Nolan Brown
It's also the same story where those 5 white kids got their asses handed to them by a big black God-King.
Adam Moore
>What's so SJW about MTG, fellow goyim? White people vs black people am I rite? >Yes, man who is not my coworker, you are entirely correct. Those pesky white males just hate black people and women. That sure is what this is about and I am happy to reaffirm your narrative.
Ethan White
This set is ass, looks slow as fuck and basically can be summed up as "DUDE WHAT IF WE PRINTED 3000 LEGENDS AND ENCHANTMENTS?". Oh and of fucking course Teferi joins the Gaytewatch.
>Dominara changes 'He or She' to 'They I just thought it was shorter. like by 8 characters, 10 if you include spaces.
I figured it was for like shoving in more text. Kind of like how they changed "Put Token onto battlefield" to "Create Token"
Samuel Gomez
Hmm...I'd have preferred if it was 'Black Hexproof' (A bit less space needed) but replacing protection with colour hexproof isn't bad.
Thomas Turner
>all white and attractive
There's 2 white people in the whole gatewatch.
Julian Wood
>No one played color hate actually You've never played casual with your buddies, have you?
Oliver Scott
>Liliana >Nissa >Chandra >Jace >Gideon at a push
Chase Thomas
There's nothing wrong with using "their", especially when you have limited space, but if WOTC's reasoning really was to appease retards who pretend they aren't male or female, that's pretty dumb.
Logan Collins
roody heavily invested in ironic sharter and master 0.25 For few months he even was etablishing a floor proposing to buy each ironic master box ppl would send to him for 150$ up to 5000 fucking boxes. Not counting the insane amount he ordered from the distributors (probably 3000+ boxes)
>Nissa It's a fucking elf, calling her a "white person" is pushing it m8. >Chandra Half poo in loo, or did Kaladesh just not happen to you? >Gideon Big ole hairy oil wrestling Greeks are not white in any universe.
Oh cool, I can't wait for these hacks to get shitcanned for constantly dumbing down the game while costing Hasbro sales.
Jacob Jenkins
It's so much worse than protection . . .
John Flores
She's still half indian you spastic.
>hurr Disney princess
I guess Aladdin was also in another timeline for you right?
Cooper Morales
Yes, it's generally weaker. However, protection was one of those things that didn't was broad enough in effect it sorta stopped seeing play as a result.
Adam Jackson
All the art of Chandra and Gideon shows them as white people. Well you maybe have a point on nissa but that's all. also are right
Jackson Hughes
Except that's not what happened.
The gatewatch is an organization that deals with planar threats. In the previous block, a planeswalker enacted a coup on one of their homes and nearly kicked off a bloody civil war as a result, so they went to hunt down his boss on amonkhet. They were confused to find that said boss is worshipped as a god among gods on amonkhet, so they split up and investigate, finding out this is so becasue Bolas rolled through a hundred years ago and killed EVERYTHING on the plane except for the children in one city and their gods, which he enslaved and then brainwashed to think that was how it had always been.
Then Bolas came back and genocided the plane AGAIN to collect the super-zombies he'd turned the plane into a death-world to mass-produce, and the gatewatch was completely helpless to stop him. They didn't ruin shit, they found a plane that had already been obliterated and rebuilt as a factory by an evil dragon and tried to help before it got rekt again.
Julian Walker
When I think of a Disney Princess, I think of Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, etc. Like 99% of them are white. If you're going full aspie, she looks 100% white. Do you think she looks Indian at all?
>I'll just keep moving the goalposts until my shill post about WotC not being SJW infested is correct
Enjoy your dying game and empty FMNs.
Logan Butler
Guys, guys, calm down. I'm sure we can all agree that specifically germanic and celtic people are white, except when including everyone else to dilute the meaning of the term while sneering at the dwindling population of remaining white people in the world. Also lets insult Indian people and Greeks by glossing over their history and culture because fuck honkies.
Now can we go back to sucking on our bbc pacifiers and pretending the cardstock quality isn't in the garbage and the game is still smart and creative?
Jaxson Murphy
Remember when Wizards printed this card without any problems?
>Enjoy me not being there being autistic and screeching SJW and muh classic magic at people he means.
Tyler Peterson
Modern terrorism problem. Jihad would be fine without Al-kekeda
Mason Perry
arabian night was the most limited printrun set ever (5 millions) and it was before the US jews decided to shit up the middle east for muh oil and false flagged 9/11.
>before the US jews decided to shit up the middle east for muh oil and false flagged 9/11. Now only their second greatest crime compared to Hour of Devastation.
Austin Roberts
You dumb cunt. An elf is always a white person with pointy ears. Are you racist towards elves now? Who gives a fuck?
Mtg has nigger elves, nigger angels and nigger vampires
Charles Wilson
Remember when Wizards straight up virtue signaled a card as being eye candy for women and gay men and nobody pitched a fit over it? Because I do. Good times. Wish they would come back.
Asher Hughes
they even had stand-alone card game literally called Jyhad back in the 90's