ITT: Weird Apocalypses

Well, that sure exists and is a thing that a person or persons wrote and illustrated.

This entire thread

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So, The Stand?

well thank god my shit sleep cycle might save me

Not my proudest fap.

That's another Apocalypse: literally everything turns into a Jojo reference.
Hell, any apocalypse with memes integrated in it would be awful to go through.

Apocalypse itself is a meme, so by that logic Jojocalypse won't be anything particularily horrible. No more than others.

So does that mean Apocalypse Now is a jojo reference? Mathematically speaking.

Rather that Jojo is a biblical text.

>it's raining horses

all the cum every man has expelled in his lifetime is suddenly and forcibly put back into his prostate, causing it to burst
only prepubescent kids are safe and the world must be repopulated by rampaging /ss/ orgies

jesus fuck

Air and water switch densities, and everyone who can't get under the water shell drowns

If it's just density switching we'd be dead anyway. We can't breathe water even if it was gaseous and all the air in the atmosphere suddenly becoming dense as water would kill all surface life with the massive pressure that would produce.
Suffocate or be crushed.

yeah but your body would be bouyant in the air and you'd naturally float up to the interface between air and water where the pressures equivalent to the surface of the sea.

The REAL problem is that the water is an immense heat sink and insulator so we'd all freeze to death because the bottom of the sea is incredibly cold but that's where we float now.

Water is a greenhouse gas. We'd start approaching Venus-like temperatures pretty quickly.

We still wouldn't be able to breathe.

Don't fall for their lies, even the Greeks knew that horses will eat your face off if they're given a chance.

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Well, ok then.

That's enough internet for today.

Glowsticks finally turn on humanity

If the densities changed the water and air would start switching places trying to go from from high to low pressure. Between all of this though would be MILES of water we'd not only instantly be under so we'd literally all just die on the spot we'd have to float to the surface miles above on literally no oxygen so we'd drown before we made it 300ft up.
Ontop of all that we aren't THAT buoyant unless we have lungs full of gas state air and in this scenario we have water density liquid instantly replacing that(which would also instantly kill us) so well over half of the population would just sink and the rest would waterlog before they even broke the surface. ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/617991/

hum

Everyone wakes up getting exactly what they want, but not what they need.

The human digestive system becomes unable to extract nutrients from any type of food except human flesh.

yeah but the bouyancy is reversed - that's preciously the point, as on the surface of the sea we float to the top of the water/bottom of the air, when the densities are reversed we'd sink to the bottom of the sea and top of the air.

You're also assuming everyone would start with loads of water underneath them that would rise up, when what would instead happen is that most people live on land, so first all the air above us would fall down and wash us all out to the bottom of the now dry ocean floor, at which point we'd float up to the interface between air and water without every getting that wet, except for anyone unfortunate enough to be at sea at the time of the great flipperoo.

>so first all the air above us would fall down and wash us all out
You mean fall down and crush us into a thin paste because of the vast pressure involved before we even have the chance to drown in liquid air.

Wouldnt kids with living dads be shoved too?

What if I want what I need?

The concept of writing systems ceases to exist in the human mind, making modern civilization impossible to maintain. Humanity enters an unrecoverable medieval stasis.

creepypasta.wikia.com/wiki/Dogscape

Everyone shrinks to thirty centimeters tall.

The call of the void becomes irresistible.

Shamalamadingdong please go

Im tired soo... mutated killer tomatoes.

Nani the fuck was all that? A post-furry-acceptance world?

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worth it

1 man kills the whole world

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what happens to the people inside?

Why does "weird" always have to mean "nonsensical, laughable bullshit"? Why does Veeky Forums constantly fawn over these so-original world "ideas" that sound like they were spawned from a Cards Against Humanity game? Far better is an apocalypse no one knows the cause of, but can guess at: Lovecraftian monsters wander the world, mysterious, nameless, and uncommon. There are anomalies, supernatural effects that lurk in certain places, without reason or rhythm. People live in little towns, rebuilding society as best as they can, but outside the walls they are at the mercy of these horrible things. That's far more compelling than everyone's farts becoming poisonous, for fuck's sake. This board more than anything else is what convinced me that originality is overrated.

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independent.co.uk/life-style/meth-ripped-out-eyes-drugs-kaylee-muthart-south-carolina-a8250926.html

Every leaf, grass, and flower in the world suddenly becomes razor-sharp and unbreakable.

I hate when that happens.

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I too get unreasonably upset over people making jokes, fellow autist.

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25% of the world's population have their blood turn blood. World-ending civil war breaks out over the extermination of the bluebloods.

Then you get nothing, smartass.

Humanity suddenly loses all fear of death, as well as the ability to let any slight go unanswered.

The first few days are interesting.

meh+, try it again, with feeling!

Wat game?

Stuck inside a horse. Correction: trapped inside of a dead horse.

Anyone who has eaten meat that day gains an overwhelming desire to be eaten by some animal. They run out into the woods and jump into zoo enclosures, raving about how "the food chain must be completed" and "I can hear them screaming. I can hear them all" or some other nonsense.

The entire world rapidly and virulently regresses to its long forgotten Garden of Eden state.

But there are no stewards for the return of the All-Holy Pure Lands.

And all the humans within are Fallen.

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>300+ people suddenly become encased in an average sized horse carcass at 35,000ft
They won't be stuck inside it for very long it'd pop like a blood balloon.

>meh+, try it again, with feeling!
It's better than any of the gay shit posted in this thread so far.

It's not. It's boring and overdone. This thread is Weird Apocalypses so pull your head out of your arse, stop wanking over Lovecraft and get surreal you uppity fuck

The Earth's rotation starts becoming faster at a rate of five minutes per month. It will get faster until the days are only a couple hours long.

Dominions 4 from what I can tell. Never played it though.

Seems interesting

A classic Veeky Forums setting made in collaboration with somethingawful.

All military weapons down to rifles become sentient, capable of communication with one another, capable of levitating, and become omnicidally bent on destroying humanity.

When did I imply the setting wasn't surreal? I didn't say it was all lovecraft shit you moron, just that some of the creatures were similar. Surreal apocalypse is my favorite kind. This is just silly shit that isn't even interesting. Cept maybe this one:

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Is that Mr Fingers?

You should make your own thread, then.

>Blood turn blood

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ur mom gay

Fun related fact. It wouldn't actually do much that would actually kill shit through physical means until it got under an hour or so of rotation. What would kill most things would be that around the time of less than 20 hours per spin our sleep cycles would tank massively for every creature and the food chain would just die off in massive swathes. Sure the winds and storms would be hectic but we have structures now that would facilitate survival and only coastal regions would be guaranteed serious destruction. Beyond that we'd actually hit a stable point somewhere between 13 and 11 hours as, with enough exposure, our sleep cycle can convert 8 hours of sleep into 2 4 hour evenly spaced sleeps as the days double up.
We'd probably just starve before the earth tore itself apart but barring that we'd last another 23 years all the while our space launches would be getting cheaper so maybe we could make viable ark ships or something.

Why?
These are all either vague as shit or nonsensical.
This is just zombies / cannibals type of shit.
Completely ridiculous.
Stupid, makes no sense. Why would that happen?
Retarded magical realm crap.
Stupid and wouldn't mean shit.
Immature toilet humor.
More magical realm crap.
Why would this matter?
More silly shit.

Yeah this thread really is a beacon of creativity. I would absolutely, definitely love to play in any of these settings, than the bog-standard horror apocalypse that people have been using for years (probably because it's actually good).

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The mental structure of all humans now forces them to say what they are thinking and express their true feelings all the time.
What changes? Would it be apocalypse inducing?

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>Why?
This thread is probably too inclusive for your tastes. A thread about sensible yet unique apocalypses will satisfy you much more.

Original /weird apocalypse/ here

>Everyone goes blind from solar flare
>Unable to coordinate against 4km per hour walking plants with taste of human flesh

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and here I thought you had came to your senses
why are all the spergs always replying to everyone in the thread, I wonder

Every man's penis becomes sentient and needs to eat someone once a day or else it will chew apart you.

Every woman's vagina needs to eat a mans penis or else it will eat them

On contact with any inanimate object, one is made perfectly aware of what it is, how it was made, where it's been, what's been done to it, and what it's been used for. 80% of all furniture and 100% of cylindrical objects less than two inches wide are burned within the week.

But what you described is just about the most generic idea you could have for an apocalypse barring nuclear war.
>God wakes up, there are monsters everywhere, weird shit happens
"Weird" is inherently the last thing you'd expect. It doesn't have to be silly or lolrandumb, but if it makes sense at immediate face value there's nothing unusual about it. When describing it to someone, the reaction you're looking for isn't "Oh okay", it's a delayed pause before asking you to repeat yourself to make sure they heard it clearly

Stop spergposting, sperg. Now post your idea so I can rip it apart for being a spergpost.

>It turns out that the tectonic plates are just the backs of enormous creatures that suddenly wake up and start walking around.

>All of humanity is immediately, individually, shadowed by nameless, faceless beings more resembling the idea of a person than an actual person
>Any attempt to interact with them in any way- outside looking at them and acknowledging/ openly talking about them- causes immediate severe neuron damage rendering you a vegetable. Essentially any direct way of attempting to understand more fries your brain.
>They're either a higher form of being or some creation from the far future completely dedicated to stopping some predicted/known universal inevitability.
>By making sure any deviation in the timeline that could ever lead to the fated scenario doesn't happen. Any random act could cause someone to suddenly drop dead from synaptic failure if the butterfly effect it causes leads the timeline in the wrong direction.

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Turns out werewolves exist, and for some reason they've stopped turning back into humans after the full moon is over. Everyone without access to silver weaponry is eaten or wolfed, like a zombie apocalypse with really fast, tough, strong, hairy zombies.

>Earth’s atmosphere is recalled due to a manyfacturing defect
>A madman runs for office on a platform that includes the extermination of all life, gets elected, and actually pulls it off
>Earth encounters its evil twin
>An engineered microbial deodorant is discovered to have a horrifying flaw fifteen years after it achieves widespread acceptance
>Enraged by overfishing, the dolphins finally use their doomsday weapon
>A castration fetish spreads like wildfire, swiftly coming to afflict a majority of the world’s population
>Japan accidentally invents anime girls that are too cute; economic activity grinds to a halt as everyone becomes a NEET
>A new breed of dogs eats all the people food
>Everyone just gets really, really tired all of a sudden and it never goes away
>Insecure aliens receive spam emails, become agitated by our superior penis-enlarging technology, vaporize humanity
>Someone annihilates life on Earth to collect on the biosphere insurance
>God of gamers and dank memes replaces the world’s seawater with Mountain Dew Code Red
>Succubi throw a massive party, trash industrialized civilization in the process
>Psychotronic weapon renders everyone illiterate
>Indigenous Amazonian tribe had the correct religion; after they’re wiped out by ranchers, everyone else gets wrecked by angry gods
>Human sex pheromones are discovered, perfume company invents a synthetic variant that is 10^9 times more effective on a per-molecule basis

You just made the Fallout games but replace "Radiation" with "Lovecraft". A lot of these apocalypses are like experiments where you change one variable to see what happens. I suppose that monsters and cults are a variable but they're kinda unfocused and vague.

this is good bait, I'll give you that, but I want you to get banned anyway because it's pretty much spam

JOshua bar-JOseph.
Coincidence?

Well shit, mr. no-fun-allowed, have some more that might be closer to your taste.
>there are suddenly no more right angles
>the sun blinks, and then both open
>effect suddenly lags behind cause
>the moon hatches open
>the night doesn't stop one day, and it keeps getting darker
>everybody's getting all raptured up, but rapture happens in cellular scale, so instead of everybody getting bodily apported to heaven one by one, it's your cells getting apported one by one
>skin contact suddenly became permanent
>the world behind mirrors have finally decided to break their geas and invade the real world
>dreams are no longer separated from reality
>Mass Polymorph Wednesday
>electronic devices became infectious to biology
>everyone now understands the language of animals and plants and insects and bacteria and viruses, how long until sanity gets redefined?
>the dead arise all over the world, but they're all preparing for battle to defend humankind against a yet-unknown entity, whom the dead call the antithesis, enemy, and antagonist
>fungi start to grow at an accelerated rate, and evolve at an accelerated rate, too

Because you idiots kicked out anyone who had any imagination and creativity.

Combine
With

>When describing it to someone, the reaction you're looking for isn't "Oh okay", it's a delayed pause before asking you to repeat yourself to make sure they heard it clearly
Okay so I should say some weird rapey-ass shit or dumb crap like because that is so, so much more interesting.

>lol u just made X except for Y
Cool. Most of the shit in this thread is a single idea with little to no value in it. Also no that is nothing like Fallout, I wouldn't allow power armor or any of those dumb mutant nuclear bazooka faggot shit. Nothing about atompunk is even vaguely unnerving.

See this at least has something to it. It's still not an apocalypse really, but it's a good idea nonetheless.

No, they left when the board was invaded by lolrandumb spergs like this:

>those
>lolrandumb
You trying to pick a fight? Some of those are lifted from HP Lovecraft you dumb fuck.

The Earth enters into a field of set universal still-point Immovable rods.

>See this at least has something to it. It's still not an apocalypse really, but it's a good idea nonetheless.
It makes zero sense, because someone’s death almost certainly has a “butterfly effect” of its own, often in excess of that which would be produced by a “random act.” You just like it because it matches the tone you’re looking for.

Mind you, a lot of these really aren’t very good. Effects generally lag behind causes, for example, and “there are no more right angles” makes about as much sense as “there are no more angles.” But you’re not helping.

Poor horsey just need a friend

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And a foal to take care of.

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