I just had some slave-scum try to convince me of the existence of humans; large Skaven-sized monkeys he claimed were-were living on the surface world above our fair warrens. The notion that the great horned one would permit such horrid perversions to live...Why, the very idea-thought is preposterous, even blasphemous.
I had him murder-killed for wasteing my time like that.
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ALL HAIL THE CALENDAR, ON WHICH GREAT HORNED RAT DAY IS A PART
>A gold crown for the good mouse
>In these uncertain and ever troubling times we citizens of Norsca more than ever needs a leader who is willing and able to do what’s right. His term had seen the greatest economic upturn in history across all of Norsca’s chaos worshipping communities before his untimely death.
>Resurect and Re-elect Prime minister Melvin and help him make the defence force of disorganization great again!
People see a weird elf and start screaming human.
Witnessed by a cheerful Valaya, High King Snorri Whitebeard records this wonderful oath. A human lord hired a group of Dwarfs to construct a house. When the work was done, the Dwarf discovered that they were paid two less pennies than expected. As the Dwarfs shrugged it off and said allowed, "Two pennies isn't work worrying about", the humans overheard and apologized profusely, even offering four pennies each for the trouble. The humans and the Dwarfs did share tankards of ale and, after a long night of revelry, the Dwarfs decreed that this kindness would be remembered, and their names written into the Great Book of Oaths that their ties of friendship may carry on forever. Their names are as follows: The Dwarfs Hagrim Hargisson, Ungir Brinzul, Okri Urriksson, Arbjorn Stonebeard. The humans Helmut Zeller, Jonas von Hafen, Ruben Merkel.
My fellow Norscans, something must be done about the barbarian hordes in the South! The brutal raids from the Empire have taken their toll on our southern shores; indeed, they see their arrays of cannon and shot as a mark of superiority over us 'hard-muscled brutes'. We can only hope that Kislev provides a strong buffer between their lands and ours to prevent a land invasion.
You mad-fool! Surely you should at least look-see for yourself? If the slave-thing squeak-speaks the truth, think of the use these man-things could have to test-test the cure-plagues of Pestilens, the open-honest diplomacy of Eshin, or the reliable wheel-engines of Skyre?
>The People's Republic of Bretonnia is suffering as the winter grows colder than in living memory and the equal distribution of firewood means families can only afford to burn one log a day
>The friendly elves of the great pine forest of Athel Loren begin deforestation on the outskirts in order to help their neighbours
Malekith the Philosopher King of Naggoroth once again attempted to sue for peace amongst the many warring factions of the world and found himself rebuffed on many fronts.
His continuous campaign for World peace and cooperation, sadly, continues in vain.
I have to say, it's damn lucky that the High Elf plot to destroy the world with their magical vortex was perfectly counterbalanced by the Slann's equally destructive enchantments. If one hadn't countered the other, we'd be awash in Chaos by now!
Man, I am so glad I still have a hankering for this well supported game with inexpensive miniatures and a thriving community.
>The ravaging hordes of the Halflings once again strike terror into the mostly peaceful lands of the Greenskin. Usually isolationist and sullen, the Orcs and Goblins had to band together to put up a stalwart defense against the blood thirsty frenzy of the Halfling warriors.
The continuously good codexes and books along with the internally consistant rules and fluff really do help.
Overhauling the rules when the scope of the game changed rather than just wallpapering over the vastly different original editions was a good call too.
Wouldn't a bizarro skaven be a highly democratic, free, intelligent and reasnable but slow to advance technologically race?
>While the world continues to wage war endlessly as it always has, the quiet and isolationist Ogres continue their religious contemplation amidst their great mountain monasties, where ascetic monks tend to small mountain gardens and orchards for the little sustenance they need.
>Amongst them, some of the most revered are the ancient Gnoblar monks, who pass on wisdom and knowledge and in return are treated deferentially by their Ogre students.
No, because even Bizaro Skaven are still Skaven, and Skaven are never beyond one standard deviation of murder-crazy stab-kill at any point in time.
They might be Murder-Smart Stab-Kill or Vote-Crazy Stab-Kill or even Murder-Crazy Free-Kill, but that doesnt really change how basically Skaven they are.
>The proud Orcs and clever Goblins keep their warrior culture tradition alive by offering their services to the most honorable of factions.
>Reverse skaven are not reverse skaven because I don't want them too.
Wow.
OP is a pretend-breed slaverat
>Idiot on Veeky Forums cant take a joke.
Wow.
What a shitty joke.
I thought you were just autistic.
>doesnt get joke
>gets called on it
>must be shitty joke, im not dumb
leave please
>Makes shitty joke
>Its so awful that nobody gets it
>Must be my bristling intelligence at work, hah.
But no, your "joke" was actually one oooh.
>Doesnt get silly joke
>Makes ass of himself
>"Nobody like it, it was dumb joke"
>Thinks hes special.
Please leave.
>silly
>joke
Oh please
ladies you both suck
>idiot
>still here
l.e.a.v.e.
Yes, go.
You have no place here with your "jokes"
Right, we should all refuse to have fun in this clearly very serious thread.
Nope, just don't write dumb shit and then jump behind its a joke excuse to feel smart.
I found the joke quite funny.
I disagree with you sir. It was merely OK.
There was no joke.
The joke was hilarious I think youll find.
I just like the mental image of vote-crazy Skaven.
>Must go to the polls-polls!
wonderful, all bases covered?
can we all shut up and keep posting bizarro shit now?
>Implying this wasn't an elaborate ploy by one guy to shit up the thread
I know what you mean, I know most people will know what you mean.
But all I think of now is a Skaven marching around a Polish guy stuck on a pole as their standard.
Did you here about this one race? They were doing this one thing that is radically different from their usual depictions! And they were doing it with this other race that were acting in a most unorthodox manner! Very Strange!
The value of the joke lies in the juxtaposition of the tone versus the subject matter. An academic explanation of a silly idea, perhaps the autistic user didn't pick up on it?
In any case, bizarro stories can't simply switch every individual aspect of a given individual our group because it destroys the cohesiveness of the story. Picking and choosing which aspects get bizzaroed is the key to making the story humorous.
Autismanon is basically being Rom from DS9: The Emperor's New Cloak