Dwarf Beard Thread

I quite like that. It also gives me the visual of stereotypical pirate braids/dreads, filled with charms and coins to bring luck and ward away bad omens. I could see dwarves traveling far away from home wearing tons of them, where dwarves staying close would only keep a few items.

Dwarves, keeping in line with their Tolkienite roots of fire resistance, naturally secrete an oil when they sweat. This oil is moderately fire-proof. It doesn't stop there, though. One area that produces this oil in relatively large quantities is the face. From the face, this oil soaks deep into the beard effectively providing the dwarf (male, of course, as female dwarves cannot grow facial hair) with an extra layer of protection against flames. Now whether the dwarf is forging all night or punching dragons, he's always hardy to the dangers of fire.

Tolkien FemDwarves have beards tho.

>as female dwarves cannot grow facial hair
Human women can grow facial hair. Human women are more dwarfy than your dwarves.

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I'm aware. If you'll re-read my post, you'll see that I was specifically speaking in regards to their resistance to fire.

That's very nice for human women, but ultimately there's more to dwarves than facial hair. Dwarf women do not grow beards.

It's just a cultural expectation. That stuff can definitely be an added bonus, but mainly I see it as the same as a man shaving his body hair, if a dwarf would shave their beard.

It's like you don't enjoy the tickle of a nice beard... what are you an elf?

I never get why people have such a problem with making is just cultural. Always liked it how the dorfs in The Dark Eye handled that.

Dwarves are a very conservative society, a long well-groomed beard is like being a made-man and showing off your custom-tailored Armani suit and people treat you accordingly.

On the other hand shaving your beard that you grew for decades may be a sign of shame or part of a punishment for a crime to signal to other dwarfs that you did something wrong.

>le glorious beard xD
>>>/reddit/

>posts a dwarf with a groomed beard
What did he mean by this?

If you really want to get down to it, it's because Tolkien's dwarves had beards and those had beards because they had long beards in Germanic mythology, which itself was because they were meant to evoke the image of extremely wizened, ancient men (hence their tiny size, wrinkly skin, misshapen faces and constant grumpiness). From there it's just been copiers copying copiers.

>In Dungeon Meshi, the dwarf's beard absorbs magic.
I wonder if that's an homage to AD&D's rules for dwarves getting an inherent magical resistance and being unable to be mages.

Dwarfish beards amplify their sense of touch. This lets them find air drafts in the tunnels, read an engraved message in the dark, and communicate through tunnels by putting their beards to a wall and using a series of knocks like morse code. Also it lets them check if a hole is wide enough to fit their shoulders when they stick their head in it.

just to spite you, ever dwarf woman in my campaign now has a flowing beautiful beard.

What about that one weird isolated settlement where the women all shave their beards

dwarves are magical, fuck it why not. when the women shave their beards they grow dicks. dwarf men dont have beards.

Dwarfs have beards because the current concept we have is from Tolkien who was pretty blatant about them being Jewish sterotypes in his WW2 allegory of a story. Orcs were nazis who were degenerates of once great nations of elves.

Trying to make sense of it is just rationalization after the fact.

>I've been thinking about why the stereotypical dwarf might have beards.

For the same reasons Sikhs don't cut their hair, or iron age Scandinavian men considered a shaving a man a way to humiliate him.

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>iron age Scandinavian men considered a shaving a man a way to humiliate him.
Amish too.

Dwarf men have the most amazing eyebrows, though.

>female dwarves cannot grow facial hair
Dropped

true, very true. it's why dwarf men get +2 to charisma

>projecting an allegory onto LotR when Tolkien repeatedly, explicitly said that it wasn't allegory
This is some fine bait you've got there user.

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A lot of men, historically.

It was seen as a masculine trait in cultures that had the genes to let men do that commonly. The group to really start the shaving thing was the Romans where they would cut hair and shave everyone due to one of the higher ups forcing it because it was rumored he couldn't grow a proper beard. Just happened to have the side effect that there was less shit to grab on a persons head and stuck from there as rome took over and spread.

Portuguese for that matter. It was a typical punishment/humiliation during the Age of Discovery. Afonso de Albuquerque (who had a massive beard himself) was famous for employing it. He did so against one of his rivals, a noble, who took the matter so seriously that he sailed all the way back to Portugal from the East Indies with the scraps of his beard saved in a pouch which he showed to King Manuel I as evidence of Albuquerque's offense.

Jews. It's because they're Jews.

Death of the Author. Just because Tolkien said it was not an allegory does not mean it can be interpreted as an allegory. While I disagree with the notion that Tolkien based LotR on World War 2, I would actually suggest it was based on his observations (and opinions) on industrialization vs. the natural order.

That's what Lord of the Rings ultimate was, an old Anglo-Saxon epic stained with the sooty fingers of Industrialization. Orcs were factory workers, their skin blackened by coal and thin, gangly bodies twisted from vitamin deficiencies and hatred of sunlight.

>does not mean it can't be interpreted as an allegory
Fixed.

>user manages to squeeze all the dumb LotR allegory shit into a single post
Well done. Dwarves are small, bearded and greedy because they were small, bearded and greedy in old germanic mythology.

Yes, absolutely nothing to do with hygiene and lice and shit

Fuck that. I typically have my dwarves culturally obsessed with grooming. No dwarf, man or woman, would be caught stepping out of the house without complex braiding of the hair or beard, and a comb and pomaide/wax for touch ups.

They are also big on bathing. Living in close proximity underground and working traditionally dirty jobs has led them being a bathing and perfuming culture.

Elves, on the other hand, are disgusting fucking hippies.

While true, this thread is about finding reasons/uses for the beards.

Maybe OP is worldbuilding. Maybe OP wants to roleplay his dwarf in a more life-like way, maybe he has a beard fetish. Who knows?

Polite request to find a thread you like instead

I was taught Caucasians tend to grow the thickest beards and it’s because Europe gets pretty cold.

Also Arabs grow them well for protection from UV rays in their deserts

Dwarves have beards because beards are manly.

Dwarf women having beards is gross. Good luck finding an actual woman to play a bearded female
t. TitsOrGTFOkin

That's great for you! All the dwarf women in my games haven't had beards for 10 years.

Dwarven women should not have beards. They should be thicc Nordic goddesses who swear like sailors but have hearts of gold and are super cuddly.

Yeah, I remember those times throughout history when sturdy Jewish warriors wielding dane axes and clad in mail went to fight their enemies.

>That's great for you! All the dwarf women in my games haven't had beards for 10 years.
Radiation?

soaking your beard wouldn't keep you cool in a forge.
I spend alot of time in a bronze foundry and the beard keeps me cool as is. If it's wet then i just end up with a big steaming beaver of hot dampness on my face, under my mask.

A dry beard is a useful beard.

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Short leukaemia .

I believe it. The main purpose of fur, even our selectively placed patches, is the trap a layer of air as additional insulation.

>as female dwarves cannot grow facial hair

Depends on the setting. And the edition, for that matter. In the Forgotten Realms, it was canon that dwarf females could grow beards until 4th Edition.

and it works wonderfully.

But the times I've left the house in a hurry with a beard full of shower or been caught in heavy rain and then had to sit in work, It just becomes a nightmare of dry skin and damp sweat.

Maybe the leathery skin of the dwarves would be fine with this?

Gayest shit I've read all day

It's also really good at catching sparks. We had an accident in the foundry once, A mould was still damp and the molten bronze caused it to shatter spectacularly, throwing sparks and little lumps of purple hot metal around the place. my beard caught a few and smothered them before they could catch fire or make their way down my shirt.
(just like it does with children.)

you can take your death of the author retardation and go fuck yourself in the arsehole with it you fucking academic halfass lazy cunt fuckwit.

that 'arguement' boils down to 'reee my headcanon is the REAL canon! canon isn't canon because i don't like IT!!!!!

it makes you a fuckwit and a faggot.

oh good, i thought you meant the beard had caught fire. eesh, didnt know that beards had so many uses in foundries. funnily enough i dont see many bearded blacksmiths in most portrayals.

you see alot of bearded welders. A beard may catch fire but since it's hair it burns quickly if it does. a burning beard means that whatever hot firey thing hit you was caught before it could catch your skin or clothing, which is always good.

I've also had the tips of my beard singed by the blast of a drying kiln opening ,which would probably have blistered my neck otherwise.

So i suppose if your dwarves are the mining forging metal loving type then a big bushy beard serves the same roll as a workmans apron,.
Maybe different dwarven craftsmen could have different beards? woodsmen have long soft beards tucked under their tunics for warmth, smiths and forge workers have bushy beards around their necks, hunters have long knee length beards to keep them camouflaged, soldiers weave mail rings into their beards as extra armour?

dont start

I've got an idea for a campaign where the beard is actually a type of symbiotic fungus that helps deal with all kinds of toxic dusts and fumes in the mines.

"got a blowjob from a dwarf and now I've gotta shave away the thrush."

>On the other hand shaving your beard that you grew for decades may be a sign of shame or part of a punishment for a crime to signal to other dwarfs that you did something wrong.
I have it as a way of having a fresh start.
A reformed criminal may cut his beard to symbolise his new, the loss of a loved one may push a dwarf to cut his beard as if saying "life will never be the same", and I may see dwarf women cutting their beards as they marry though some prefer to keep it ("You're my whole life" vs "I give you all I am").

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I've used beard cutting as a punishment basically as a forced do over. You've lost your honor, now start again. All the history and honor you gained as your beard grew is now gone with it. You now have to start over physically and socially.