Why don't the Eldar just extract semen via surgical needles and inseminate their females without having sex?

>Be eldar guardian on patrol
>Suddenly lifted 200 feet in the air in a lightning fast sweep
>See beautiful, yet horrifying bird lady grasping me in her talons
>"Hey, want some fuck? My rate is a soulstone an hour"
>fucking Swooping Hookers

And why don't they just make wraith constructs on mass?

Because the idea of messing with the dead is kind of sacrilege.

You're dragging someone's soul from the relative peace of the infinity circuit, to be placed into a cold existence, to live only for war.

There's a reason why when Iyanden had to raise their ghost army, the Dark Eldar came to congratulate them on how fucked up they were.

>the recipe is a normal diamond, add salt, tears of a sister of silence, wash in the saliva of a grox, then have it get eaten by a human serf and collect it after it passes his system
>this stone is ptactically unbreakable, only Cawl himself knows how

Eldar are pathological dicks, and usually refuse any sort of help from anyone for any reason, as a result of their hugely overblown egos.

This usually results in them shooting themselves in the foot, them blaming literally anyone else for their problems.

>Eldrad creates Ynnead and he goes to Yraine and then she destroys 3 craftworlds
>Biel-tan hates the mon'keigh even more as a result
Is autism part of the eldar condition?

Isn't that description also fit for the Imperium and the Tau in a bad day?

For the Eldar, every day is a bad day.

What about the clowns? Also cool I didn't know that, I thought they just had fertility issues

>And if they fail why not ask Cawl through Gulliman to make better soulstones for them. If he he upgrade marines and make new tanks, he can make soulstones 2.0.

Holy fucking shit I'm triggered

Attached: stop.jpg (240x236, 10K)

Psyker/warp shit.

Cuz they are all fairly powerful in that way as a species, it make things complicated. Aside from the constraints describes, I would speculate that the emotional(heavily connected to warp/psyker bs) connection of the parents and the 2 part conception and subsequent growth period would have a notable impact on how the prospective child develops.

I also wonder about Harlequin procreation. The males could easily sleep with anyone willing and increase the genetic diversity of other populations, but the females would need time off and might have to give the babies to Craftworlders or Exodites to raise.

One thing I heard was that their reproduction rate was lowered to a fraction because the Fall ended their reincarnation process, but I don't know if the reincarnation cycle thing has been retconned or not.

I love how ridiculous Cawl has become. At this rate people is going to ask why hasn’t he fixed Emperor?

Come to think of it, how would that conversation go. More importantly would it take Uncle Cawl another 10000 years to make soul stone 2.0

Well there's only 3 people in the Imperium that know how it works and they are all kinds of "dead", Dorn, Vulkan and the Emperor. Which kind of begs the question of why hasnt the Emperor given one of his personal tech-priests the solution, perhaps he wants to die, maybe he has foreseen it to not be so necessary.

It's like cats. Male organ has small "barbs" that stimulate female into ovulation during sex, improving chance of conception.

>people is going to ask why hasn't he fixed Emperor?
I mean, where did you THINK GW was going to go after they finished bringing back Primarchs?

>harlequis have whole mountains of them
Imagining scrooge mcduck as a harlequinn swimming in a bin full of soulstones now

Oh hmm. Good idea, but that could still be artificially replicated, and that mechanism *is* designed to improve chances of conception, so... that would kind of make the birthrate problem make *less* sense.

I am sitting here seriously thinking about the reproductive systems of space elves what am I even

Haha xD elf dick

I thought soul stones could only be gotten from Crone Worlds, deep in the Eye of Terror? Harlequins were just protected by their god, and Dark Eldar don't give a fuck and survive by using others pain or whatever.

For the next time some faggot sperg about hybrids or something.

craftworlders? yes

with the paths they've essentially built their society around autism

eldar population was stagnating for centuries even before the fall, which is one of the reasons they fell so hard to excess. Sex wasn't making babies, so they fucked...alot.

They require a long term commitment and bonding with their partner for their psychic energies to meld and make a baby.

Dark Eldar don't use soulstones and are the most numerous faction, ergo no.

Um, no, what you just said supports the user's point-- the DEldar population isn't constrained by the need for soulstones, therefore they can outbreed the Craftworlders.

DE use different means. Which are an antithesis to craft world culture. Ergo yes.

If you think fucking around is enough to feed Slaanesh you should reread it's fluff.

did you miss the part where I said 'a lot'?

one of the reasons they fell to excess was their infertility.

Pretty much.

They are named Drukkari. Use the name.

And Drukkari are spared because they are physically stunted. You want to see what happens to normal Aeldari without Spiritstones and the discipline of a path system? Look at FWs rules for the Outcasts.

That's what the Drukkari are doing. That's where the "halfborn come from".

>be Cawl
>make space marine space marines
>asked now by Bobby to make stonesouls or whatever for his gf
>that boy ain't right I tell ya hwat
>do it in a few centuries because fuck you I should be fabricator general reeeeeeeeee!

>one of the reasons they fell to excess was their infertility.

Bullshit.

Don't say bullshit you made up on the spot. We can easily fact check you. This isn't /v/.

please do so then.

>They are named Drukkari. Use the name
I'm not okay with my wife sleeping with other men, so I will use their proper name of dark eldar

Cite your source first.

They are named Dark Eldar. Fuck off GW corporate.

It's spelled Drukhari, and I will not use that name any more than I would use Astra Militarum. I will use "druchii" if you insist.

Aslo, I'm pretty sure that half-born are test tube babies grown in laboratories, though that does raise the question of why Craftworlders can't do likewise. Human cloning is supposed to be bad luck, maybe Eldar have a similar problem with all artificial wombs?

Not Eladrith Ynneas?

>druchii

That means Dark Elves.

Use Drukhari from now on.

>though that does raise the question of why Craftworlders can't do likewise.

The technologies used in the process are described with negative terms. Asuryani prefer the natural and spiritual way of reproduction.

Had to take a trip to the Lexicon for that one! That's fine for formal situations, but no way am I typing it out for casual use.

I really think the "good" ending of 40K would be that the Emperor was dying when they put him on the throne and he later just quietly died in the night. Humanity has just been doing this all by themselves this entire time.

Well aren't you bossy. And druchii is in the Lexicanum *Eldar* lexicon, though it does look like a Craftworld term rather than a self-designation. Regardless, I don't even use Tempestus Scions habitually, so no.

And I did speculate that Eldar might have problems with artificial wombs, it's just that we know they *can* be safely used for humans under the right conditions.

Then type Drukhari

>Eldar* lexicon

"Shadow Point (Novel): [Needs Citation]"

Sure it is.

...

Nah

Attached: CALL THEM DRUKHARI.png (490x324, 259K)

dark eldar is a stupid fucking name, especially considering they're the larger number of eldar.

Even before 8e I refused to call them that retarded name.

Drukkari literally means "dark ones".
Even the dark eldar call themselves dark eldar.

and it still sounds better than 'hurr DARK eldar!'

should we call harlequins 'silly eldar'?

ooh, maybe exodites are 'goatfucker eldar'

and while we're at it? Corsairs is a stupid name, let's call them 'pirate eldar'.

Harlequins are clowns, so clown eldar (which people already do call them).
The exodites are NA because no one uses exodites, and corsairs are essentially pirates.
So yes, and craftworld eldar are the mon'keigh fucker eldar.

They're the dark eldar of the dark city, lit by the dark suns. On their realspace raids they use darklight weaponry. Vect canonically started calling his race the dark eldar. Give in to the darkness, join us.

or I could just call them drukhari, which is the superior name, and trigger you fags who refuse to adopt a non-mon'keigh name.

Well, I just assumed you were in the closet. I didn't know you were out. Just don't autistically screech at other people to call them that.

I didn't. I replied to the user autistically insisting that nobody should call them by their proper name.

Which is Drukhari.

Their proper name is dark eldar tho.

Wait, back up. Who the heck was insisting that *no one* use Drukhari? Because I'm not seeing that in the thread.

see

Drew Carrie isn't a faction, it's an actor.

keep up with the complaints, your pain fuels me.

And it won't stop Drukhari from being Drukhari.

I'm from the future and this user is right. By my time, Cawl has:

>Invented mass production soulstones, saving the Eldar race
>Reverse engineered then improved on Necron pylons, creating a sophisticated pylon array around a now tiny Eye of Terror
>Developed an artificial synapse signal, which has thrown the Tyranid hive fleets into complete disarray
>Hacked into Orkish brains and unlocked the secrets of the Old Ones
>Replicated the pheromones used by the Ethereals to control the Tau, allowing the Imperium to effortlessly enslave the Tau Empire
>Successfully charted the webway in its entirety
>Developed a new safe method of FTL travel that doesn't rely on the Warp
>Developed new therapy methods which successfully cured all of the primarchs' (all of them have been revived by my time) autism
>Cured the emperor, who promptly declared him the true Omnissiah

>Drukkari literally means "dark ones".

Citation needed.

It will however stop anyone who isn't new from calling them their proper name.
Like space puppies, or smurfs.

I dont see the problem, any functioning human being just has to look at their codex to see what the faction name is. A game without memes or inside jokes is an empty husk.

I think it's old gaelic, but it's midnight here and I can't be bothered to look properly.

DE don't need soulstones since they just need to stay high on other's pain to avoid Slaanesh.
Craftworlders do.
Ergo, crafworlders could use test tube babies (and maybe they do), it wouldn't change anything.

why don't you use eldar runes instead of roman alphabet while you're at it?
Brb, gonna eat with my 中文 friends and watch アニメ together.

Lmao I bet you have actual autism

I honestly think autists are the biggest occupational hazard when it comes to playing Veeky Forums shit.

Why would you use Chinese and Japanese that's not right

Dont the clowns just recruit from the craftworlders/dark eldar/exodites. I dont think anyone is born a harlequin.

can eldar breed with humans?

GW never said no.

>Dont the clowns just recruit from the craftworlders/dark eldar/exodites
Yes. Nobody knows what makes one a worthy recruit. (Outside old fluff mention self-exorcism and that Cegorach is not fond of prideful jerks of any kind)

Rogue Trader fluff: Yes (see, Illiyan Nayataste)
Modern fluff: No, but there are rumors of 'maybe' involving corsairs (one of the Ultramarines books) and Dark Eldar (Jes Goodwin and Phil Kelly in the video introducing the 5th Edition Dark Eldar)

>Steadfastly refuses to call them by their proper GW approved name
>calls others autists

The thing that said they couldn't got retconned, so yes.

Are Dark Eldar the best at bants?

>the superior name
I don't care about the whole copyright shit and all the debate around, but that's highly subjective. If you're a bretonfag like me (or more probably a welshfag), Drukhari obviously sounds like the word "drouk/drwg", which means "evil". Since I can't imagine why the not!dark eldar would ever take such a name, I personally prefer a more neutral one. I usually call them "Commorrites" but "dark eldar" is fine since that's what Eladrith Ynneas is supposed to mean and the original eldar name doesn't convey any connotation for 21st century humans.

>Inb4 lol no one cares about fictional names having a real meaning in your half-dead language
And I'm fine if you don't feel concerned, really. But hey, remember the Druchii from WFB ? Well, "droch" also means "bad" in Scottish. Again, same undertone, I guess GW really scratched their head when looking for the 40k version...

TL;DR : If you're thinking from an IRL point of view, "drukhari" doesn't sound either original or particularly relevant as a self-designation. But it's perfectly fine when humans or Craftworlders are talking about Commorrites or if you don't give a shit about meta-analysis, so feel free to use it. It's their official name and that's how most of the future fanbase will call them, just don't try to argue about how it sounds "superior" to the previous designations.

>stop anyone who isn't new
So... just like Tempestus Scions and Aeldari, eventually everyone but a couple of salty grogs.

Ya, Rule #27 of 40k: Everyone is or will be fucked.

What thing? That thing that followed a magos biologos dissecting various xenos and it described the really weird Eldar reproductive system?