>went out on date with woman last night from tinder. >when she asked what I do I told her I trade bitcoin and bought in early. >said I was a multi millionaire, even though Im not. >we end up fucking on the first date. >ended up leaving the condom in her garbage can in her washroom, left early before she got up. >turns out she has schizophrenia and told me how she used the condom to insert my sperm inside her. >claiming she's now pregnant and I'll have to take care of her the rest of her life.
This was 2 months ago. I'm actually considering suicide at this point. What the fuck do I do? I feel guilty for lying to her about my net worth but she's crazy. Can I somehow tell a lawyer she did this with the condom?
Guys please help. I'm seriously really lost right now and trying to not go back to the drugs like before. Please anons help me.
>Implying the sperm cells didn't die till she did it If you're not LARPing, ask for a DNA test, OP.
Zachary Johnson
She’s prob lying. Have her take me a pregnancy test. Then stay far away
Luke Hall
>not flushing the condom Mistakes were made. You always have to be prepared for this sort of thing when you're rich. Make sure you only use your own supply of condoms too, some girls will give you one but it will have a hole poked in it so you get her pregnant.
Jack Parker
pay child support now OP you know its the right thing to do
Levi Rogers
Don't stress get paternity test,if she did that you not the only loads she was taking. If it yours then panick. Or if you not poor tell her you give her 1k to abort .
Owen Hill
the chance of her actually being pregnant are so low you dont need to worry about it
Zachary Ortiz
This is probably impossible. Sperm dies really fast outside of the body. Get a dna test.
Angel Sanchez
absolutely. she is probably talking BS. demand paternity test, see how she will never call back
Gavin Morales
sperm only lives within the condom for 20 minutes
t. big cum maker
Daniel Ross
>Not being a virgin Pathetic
Jeremiah Johnson
nice larp virgin faggot
Michael Phillips
Accuse her of rape, or cumstealing or something
Carter Jones
thats rape
Aiden Scott
to be fair, even tho hes larping, sperm has been found to last up to 72 hours
edit pic related
Samuel Carter
>>when she asked what I do I told her I trade bitcoin and bought in early >telling a random wymym about your crypto gains on a first date
low quality b8 and larp, stopped reading here No one can be that dumb, it's fucking impossible. Must be one of these daily LARP threads "cryptoanon gets cucked by his gf". There are at least few of them every day on /biz
Gavin Myers
Yeah but not in those conditions.
Zachary Sanders
Yeah inside a woman’s vaginal canal. Not sitting in a condom most likely coated in spermicide. There is absolutely no chance this is possible. None. Zero. Zilch. Nada.
Leo Peterson
>get pregnant with chads baby >have no money >immediately go looking for beta bux and sleep with one right away >he insists on a condom >but wait... if he leaves the condom in the trash, this could work...
aside from the condom part this has been happening for thouands of years, possibly hundreds of thousands of years. it happens a lot these days due to hookup culture replacing actual relationships with brief flings on chads cock
Zachary Richardson
I would totally do this. I'm ugly and boring so I feel like I have nothing to offer besides my gains. except I only have 300k so it's even more pathetic.
Lincoln Miller
why didnt u flush the condom u deserve it all
Jaxson Reyes
By your own picture you should realize this sperm would be long dead.
Not only are most condoms lined with spermicide these days, but the inside of a condom is not an ideal environment for sperm survival. They probably died within hours.
Furthermore, even if she dumped them into her pussy right away, she would have needed a fucking turkey baster to get them where they need to be going. Just dumping sperm on top of your pussy while you spread your lips open isn't going to get you pregnant, ever.
If OP isn't larping, his baby momma is.
James Hernandez
just ignore she'll have to prove its your baby, which isn't possible, because it isn't
she found a guy she thought was immature and gullible and inexprienced enough to fall for her roastie tricks and rich enough to support chads baby. thats all
she could be running this scam on a few dudes right now waiting to collect on whichever beta bux program looks best
Wyatt Bennett
Just say you lied about having money and laugh at her
Jordan Wood
This. It wouldn't last that much inside a condom covered in spermicide.
Ryan Clark
this, im totally paranoid about what happened to you and thats the first thing I always do. I even wrap it in a little bit of toilet paper to make sure its gone
Ryan Hill
You can buy Saint Kitt and Nevis citizenship for $150k, leave the US the dump your US citizenship. Then change your name and buy another citizenship in another banana republic
That's probably enough to cut the trail
Hudson Baker
>If OP isn't larping
>cyh6wlrV >guise pls i need ur help, pls respond >1 post by this ID
yeah, totally not a larp
Matthew Peterson
...
Brody Garcia
Fucking with condom lol Not cumming in mouth lol Idiot retard die please
Bentley Long
Meh ~ I've done it. Not exactly a first date, but a girl I had met twice before in a bunch of friends going out situation. I tell her about (100x my real) crypto gains during full mania phase, suddenly I'm not a weird unemployed guy, she says I'm a super interesting outside the box thinker and wow your feet are so big and hey I know it's a bit late do you want to come to my house and watch a movie I feel you would love it and I feel really connected to you. Still undecided how many women are like that, but there are a lot of shameless whores.
Dude is still LARPing, but that part I could believe.
Lucas Bailey
this but he didn´t actually buy early so the first step at 150k is too much already
Connor Perez
she's not being as dishonest as you think. women have feelings that involve disliking weird guys that have no resources. awkward losers with no resources of course she'll feel nothing for him. but enter the resources and suddnely she is physically capable of feeling attraction. all women are like this and can we really blame them?
imagine theres this fat woman you vaguely know but she's boring. you feel nothing towards her. you don't see her for a year and then out of nowhere you see her again and she's lost weight, she's no longer fat and you realize hey she's actually hot. you go over to talk to her and the personality you didn't notice before because she's fucking boring suddenly seems interesting. you are feeling feelings that you later attempt to justify rationally by convincing yourself that shes special.
men hook up with boring bland as fuck dumb broads because they have are physically attractuve
women hook up with awkward as fuck beta males but only if they are attractive in some way, usually resources
what did you expect? at the end of the day its breeding instncts that drive male-female relations not logic or integrity (that only comes into the picture later and not so often these days)
Kevin Jenkins
Joke's on her! You're broke
Brody Green
I don't really disagree with you except on the honesty thing, I think we both behaved like liars. But I don't know how to put it, at some point it feels like interacting with an NPC. I was aware of the little manipulations she was putting in the conversation but it didn't feel that it crossed her mind that maybe I was also manipulating her. Or maybe she did it and she enjoyed it? In any case, if we are mostly programmed behavior then it feels dark the upside of being honest compared to the upside of appearing honest and how people with even less scruples could be using that.
Dominic Lee
women like playing games and a man capable of playing games back shows reproductive fitness. but women are largely subconscious creatures that aren't as consciously aware as men, so often they play games instinctively. women are all normies and normies are very animalistic and don't think deeply or reflect on things they just do.
Carter Ross
Im a (german) law student. Go to the police and tell them about what she did.
Eli Barnes
>1 post by this ID Oh look another LARP Thread, sage goes in all fields
Xavier Johnson
Let me tell you why this is bullshit. Sperm isnt as effective as you think it is. The condom has spermicide inside of it and your sperm was sitting in it for a while at room temp for a decent bit. Female vaginas also have spermicide in it and their bodies actively try to kill the sperm to prevent defective sperm from reaching the egg. She would need a turkey baster to even get the sperm close to her ovaries so self inseminate. Now you also think that she has proof that this is your kid even though shes only 2 months pregnant. Please larp harder next time.
Tyler Price
fuk it dude, load up on iExec and dump her EOY
Adam King
Only prostitutes hook up with beta rich guys I'm not even WKing here.. women don't need money that badly these days, makeup and drinks aren't that expensive and most have cushy PR jobs and tons of free shit from ppl especially if they're not ugly. Money doesn't get pussies wet, good looks and maybe celebrity status does. Most roasties can barely stand sitting next to a non-Chad in the subway let alone spending hours talking with him and pretending to enjoy the sex
Levi Bell
are you mentally disabled? This is only true if it's inside her body or in some sort of lab. pls fucking look at ur own picture. >the absolute state of Veeky Forums
Dominic Peterson
Lol don't worry about it. Regular sex has a pretty low fertilising rate let alone trying to impregnate yourself with a spermicide covered condom
Zachary Allen
Just a few more replies to get the punters nice and hooked then it's time to post the eth address and start begging
Ethan Scott
"cumstealing"
Jayden Adams
I've heard that some whores prefer this option especially if the man is an ice hockey player, they then inseminate themselves with it.
Gavin Myers
>went out on date with woman last night from tinder. >last night >This was 2 months ago.
Robert Adams
how can people so retarded
Ryan Jenkins
finally someone else noticed it
Camden Garcia
Is this inches?
Cooper Jones
pfft
Jason Howard
Take a paternity test you fucking retard. Unless you're French then you're fucked.
Gabriel Bailey
>>claiming she's now pregnant and I'll have to take care of her the rest of her life. Why do ameritards believe this? >Lol lol you came inside me now you must take care of me and muh child xD Are they this fucking naive and retarded? Enjoy starving with you and your fetus that dies in 3 months. Jesus Christ if I catch you doing not going straight to her and punching her in the gut or even better simply ignoring her dumb ass then I will book a flight ticket to where you live and teach you how eastern europe handles these smartasses.
God you americans really need a healthy dose of communism the same way us russian needs a healthy dose of capitalism.
Carson Morgan
french are trashy whores >tfw mom is french
Caleb Anderson
DO IT FAGGOT >user stop playing the badass chad, you're just a wimp. If school bullying and rampant destruction of abandoned buildings has taught us anything is that everything is permitted as long as nobody reports it or you don't get caught.
Gavin Gonzalez
Youre not married to her and it's illegal to Do dna tests without your consent so chill you just have a kid running out in the world now, nothing to worry about. Your coins are alrihht
Ryan Ross
>always recycling old threads topics er you deserve it, kek?
Daniel Powell
>women are all normies HAHHA LUL
Ethan Lewis
DUDE DO NOT GET A PATERNITY TEST! If it is positive you are fucked forever, they cannot do anything without your consent right now, she is a single mother now and you are a free man with a little you out there. If you cannot raise the child, don't give a shit about it.
Jayden Walker
It's a good way to get fuck fast. And twice, according to op's story.
Adam Sanchez
Top kek. I used to tie the condom, take it with me and throw it away on the way home. You dumb OP.
Aaron Moore
Child support doesn't follow you in other countries. If you are a burger or an eurocuck just get the fuck out of there and settle elsewhere, its easy for you people
Jordan James
>I'm not even WKing here.. women don't need money that badly these day Some does. The most fucked up, the most they need it. Why not?
Blake Smith
Date her once more. Then kill her. Easy.
Also: Join the discord group. Pic related. discord gg/jJTZmyb
Hunter King
why dont just just date her again, and let her drink like 10 shots. if she is taking 10 shots she is definitely not pregnant if she is not drinking anything, just ask her and take it with your iphone recorder. if she says she is not pregnant by you, you are fine. if she lies you are also fine, if she says she took the condom cum ( LUL ) and inserminated it, you are also finde because thats not legal in almost every normal country ( some muslim shitholes maybe not, dont know )
Joseph Cruz
Lol just tell her you lost everything in the recent crash
Anthony Richardson
Next time, price-lock your sperm before going out for the night and then unlock the morning after.
Carson Cook
>telling a woman you JUST MET how much money you have dumbest shit you can do, hope this isn't a larp and you pay the price for your idiocy
Andrew Peterson
>clogging someone's toilet just because you think they can get pregnant from a used condom o lord
you too, I see you you simple minded brute
Elijah Bell
Dumbass.
I always put hot sauce in my used condoms.
Cooper Howard
>Not swallowing the rubber after sex What a fucking retard, there is all sorts of good vitamins, lipids and proteins in semen. And you don't really taste it, you just tie a knot on the kondom, and swallow it whole.. The rubber will degrade in your stomach, you get a free protein shake and you don't have to worry about lunatic women and potential children.
David Rivera
This is why I always add bleach to the condom before I throw it in the garbage.
Rookie mistake user.
Thomas Brown
if she told you that via text, just screenshot that shit and you're fucking clear
Aiden Green
Just tell her in reality you're poor as shit then if she is actually pregnant she'll have no reason to keep it.
Parker Brown
>Accuse her of rape
Bentley Edwards
>And twice Fucking kek
Angel Mitchell
Send us, your Bros, the money; Tell her; watch her cry
David Martin
go back to drugs, dummy
Caleb Wood
>Not burning the condom after you use it ISYGDDT
Hunter Sanchez
>cumstealing
Zachary Sanchez
How she told you she used it? Any online messenger is a proof. If it was offline, then you're fucked. Good luck. >Feminism
Juan Miller
lol
Isaiah Morales
He was lying to get laid and it worked
Angel Bailey
tell her you lied and you are in massive debt and that you actually lost your coins from trading , ask her to marry you and that will figure it out and you are a good guy , she will abort that baby in an instant you are wellcome
Lincoln James
i have a solution OP. just give my your bitcoins so you come up clean during an audit and i will just give them back to you after she divorces you
Nathan Davis
This
Robert Hughes
this. schizo is a 2 way street
Isaiah Hernandez
>rape her >she mindrapes you back i dont know op sounds like you were meant for each other
Colton Morgan
Holy shit kek. This x infinitum
Joshua Mitchell
this
Leo Stewart
OP if your not larping this. anything along this line. show her a fake portfolio with a few doge coin or whatever, and say you lied about your gains cuz of how much you didnt want to lose her. and how you plan on marrying her, how much u love her, ect. being broke and wanting 2 mary a hoe is top of the line cringey for a wymin unless ur a 8/10+ or something
Connor Evans
I think it's the exact opposite. The economy is so bad in the west the young women are getting very desperate to marry rich men. Older men are now again in fashion it's like we are back in 50's soon as economy only gets worse, unemployment rises with cost of living. Most women salary you can barely afford live in the cities alone without a man earning a good salary paying for living ==> women get desperate. And in cities there are more women than men. Countriside is filled with single men then again
Luke Jenkins
In the air, semen stays alive for like 15 minutes. She's full of shit, your semen was already inactive.
Wyatt Murphy
either you're larping or she is. sperm doesn't survive long outside the body. definitely not overnight. you should still raise that bastard tho cuz you're a cuck
Thomas Cruz
>oh look, it's a faggot >trip and name on an anonymous message board It checks out.
Connor Adams
Yes OP listen to the these Anons, holy fuck has the Education system failed so many in Burger Land. First of all Sperm dies fast, is impossible for her to insert that sample with out proper procedures. Your Ok OP dont let her KEK You faggot be strong