I'm getting in March and was wondering how does Veeky Forums couples manage their expenses and split their financial responsibilities with their significant other? Here is a brief background about us: In my case, I have a mortgage and an auto loan. I also make $104,000 / yr. In her case, she has student loans and an auto loan. She makes $49,000 / yr.
I hear some couples have 3 accounts: 2- individual private accts and 1- shared acct.
i paid for my wife's student loan off since we had a baby right away and she didnt work. One shared account and we have separate credit cards.
Nice hairline bro
i took all our savings and put them into RLC and lost them. She told me not to worry it'll go up. that's our financial situation.
haven't had sex in a year.
Separate accounts you faggot. Are you retarded?
why do married couples dont have sex? is it a meme? what do you think when you dont fuck for 6months+?
all in monero and pretend you have no money
most of my networth is in crypto, laundered through monero. Not really in case of a divorce though.
Wife shouldn't be working, but having kids. She can work after they are on a school pattern.
>not working while having kids
The lost career opportunity costs FAR MORE than any daycare expense.
Veeky Forums will probably think I'm an idiot but this is my marriage:
I'm 22 and my wife is 39. She does not work and I don't want her to get a job but I've compromised by letting her take an online course to improve her English. I make about $40k a year, but used to make $70k a year before I was fired from that job. I have $250k in crypto right now and we own a 3-bedroom 2-bathroom apartment worth about $300k together and she has significant bond holdings which won't expire until she's much older.
I control our bank accounts and have my own private bank accounts with a different bank and move the money around for investing however I want. She considers cooking and cleaning around the house to support me as her job and she gets "paid" for that job. If she doesn't cook or behaves badly, I cut off the funds or move them out to my private account and the funds move back into our shared accounts based on her behavior and cooking regularly again.
Generally curious of the benefits of marriage. Been dating same girl for 7 years, we're both debt-free and have no desire to have children. Both agree marriage is a false institution designed to shill people into having children. We plan on splitting a house together and are both reasonably aware that things could go south for any reason. so why get married?
Just don’t. You have it made just the way you are.
Immigration benefits, tax breaks if in the US, and its better if you do decide to have children. If you do not have a strong need for these things, then you have no need to get married right now.
>22 >39 JUST
Then you get fucked up kids with abandonment issues who learn who knows what from daycare Also chance to be abused Rather have wife look after kids desu
I'm all for helping my significant other financially, but you better believe I'm going to have control of the money that I make.
20 years + shared accounts ... have no clue and would never be with someone where there is “mine “ and “yours” so fucking weird.
If you allow your wife to be financially independent from you, you're asking for a divorce.
She should only be able to spend exactly what you allow her to.
Give them to your/her parents In my case, my brother never should. I was neet during that time and he brought them here so my mother could watch over them. As a neet nothing is more holier than sleep. It makes you insane hearing screaming kids at 7 am when you should be sleeping till at least 1 pm
Is she (or you in this case) financially responsible?
>Yes Shared all the way.
>No Separate accounts, credit cards (individual) only on a shared joint account for monitoring. So if you is disproportionately high, call it out.
It's that easy, transparency is key here. Don't have trust, your marriage is worth link.
Why the fuck do people marry in first place. Marriage is all about giving women power. You as a man get nothing.
Im 24 and still feel too childish and young for marriage. Maybe when im 40 or so. And when im millionaire maybe with 65
Enjoy shitty kids while they are at a daycare that employs non-whites
Wife and me both work, since the begining we.decided to have a common account that we refill from our personal accounts when needed. This account is for food, mortage, kids stuff, etc, etc.
The ratio each one of us pay is proportional to what we earn at that moment. When she took a non paid leave to be with our baby i put all the money, now that she works and earns almost double than me she puts twice the money.
Working great so far.
what you do is put lots of your money in crypto, so that when she divorces your ass she wont take half of your shit. end of the day hoes aint loyal
yes, you are an idiot. she cannot have kids. why did you do this?
>Both agree marriage is a false institution designed to shill people into having children.
>paying your wife's student loans Ah, the modern dowry. Do you think she is even grateful?
Whether larping or reddit, you need to fuck off and die.
fucking hell, marriage? really? It is a fact that if your wife wanted to, she could take you for half your assets, and prevent you from seeing your kids/future kids. Marriage is financial suicide for men. You think you are being JUSTED when your shitcoin drops 30%? what about when your net worth drops 50%?
Make money even in this bear market. We have all the tools you need,,
My fiancee and I have been sharing money for years similar to the method you mentioned
>Have individual accounts we get paid into >Have shared account that we both put money in for weekly expenses >I have another account that I put money in and pay bills from >She pays home loan >We use the advance on our house as savings for renovations, maintenance, holidays, gifts, replacements and emergency >We have worked crypto into our budget and dollar cost average each week
I get 900/w and she gets 1100/w so the figures arent split down the middle but the budget is set up so we have to make the least amount of transactions possible
Marriage is pretty much a partnership for mutual benefit. Sex becomes a low priority if you don't work the same hours as your other half and also have kids in the mix. My partner and I used to sex almost daily when we were younger but now it's a 1-2 times a week thing sometimes less
This sounds like such a strange relationship. Not dissing it, just curious about the dynamics if you care to share even further. How does a younger man end up wearing the pants with a housewife old enough to be his mom?
I aspire to one day have such a glorious and gentlemanly beard.
Depends on the individuals. Tax breaks are huge and you qualify for more benefits while you are married. You will get a better deal on your mortgage if you are married. You also only get specific medical authorization if you are married. Like you won't be allowed to see her after a major accident if you aren't married. Really look up most of the reasons why people didn't like the whole gay marriage thing and you will find a lot of benefits to marriage. That said I personally don't agree with marriage and won't be getting married any time soon.
depends on your situation, if your goals and values align then combine.
separate is best for me, i'm not responsible for any of her debts without cosigning. i had her as an authorized user on my cards when she wasn't working but when she started working again it didn't work out at all.
I have so many questions....
Explain the age difference??
Her English is bad?? Where did you meet her, Mail bridal wife?
Where did she get bonds from if she's just moved to the country????
How can you literally PAY your housewife to do her intended job of cooking and cleaning?????
Fuck that shit, if I have a wife, she doesn't have to work. But she's getting an allowance, not my full bank account.
I dont see how any of you do this separate shit.
It does nothing but undermine trust, which is incredibly important in marriage.
It makes no sense that you each view the other's debts or problems as the other person's problems. You are married, therefore, your debt/her debt, is now each others.
Not married but my parents have always been open to me about their finances. They have their own accounts officially but everything is joint.
They have an expectation on what they can spend money on. My mom just puts money in her account and buys only what's needed and my dad just manages everything 100%. I remember my mom saying she wanted more control over the money and my dad said then you can pack your bags and have it on the curb kek
Back in the day with basically a zero divorce rate ... how many marriages you think had mine and yours? It’s a disaster and builds resentment ... go ahead and fail anons... one of you in the marriage has moments of bitterness because their “allowance” is lower than the others.
Undermines trust + easily creates bitterness.
If you cannot share finances and openly talk about finances between each other, then you have no reason to get married. You have bigger issues.
We didn't know each others' ages until maybe the fifth date and she's Asian and I'm white so it's very hard to tell the difference in age. I met her in Korea, where I live, and I speak fluent Korean so the fact that her English is mediocre isn't too important. She speaks well enough to communicate with my family. Her bonds are in Korea, where she lived her whole life. I "pay" her because I don't want her to get another job, so she sees it as me doing my job in the corporate world, getting paid, and then her doing her job at home and getting paid by me even though we share the accounts the money goes into. I'm inclined to put it 100% into crypto and go practically without food if the money is left with just me, but she is overall extremely frugal.
So why are you married to someone that cannot give you kids?
They have a kid together. He already won, cuck.
1 shared for rent and bills we put exactly that much on it 1 - 1 private because its our own money that we made, if we want to split something we'll do it on the stop and not take it for granted
also marriage is a scam, we just signed some paper that in case something happens to either of us we can make decisions like take a surgery or not. don't be some conservative cuck
you will be quite lonely.
Marriage is a union. You have one shared bank account. If you need to have separate accounts in order to get along you have much larger issues at hand.
>22 male coming into his prime, marrying a 39 year old used goods
JUST. There has to be a word for this.
Can you imagine yourself being fit and alpha while she's a old hag trying to hide the wrinkles and gray hair behind plastic surgery and make-up. Hope you signed a pre-nup and didn't disclose your crypto wealth.
hes green carding her to get korean citizenship
if that really is you, you seem like a decent guy, well balanced emotionally & rationally minus the possible overly liberal cancer ideology that might be tied with ur beard style. are you guys talking about in the states? which one? 150k is a boatload, just listen to rich dad poor dad once, and realize how useless the program is and teach u jack shit about "assets", it does a good job explaining what money is, listen to earl nightingael too. similar stuff but more brief. art of war by sun tzu & 48 laws of power by green fag or w/e. will take a day or 2, but it will actually help you. the point is they all point to the same thing despite being all different fags.
to your personal question, how much do you trust her? how much does she actually trust you other than what she says? how upfront are you both to each other? if you both earnestly love and trust each other and both have IQ over 105 and arent overly impulsive, stick with 2. if she overly pushes for either just 1 bank account or 3, be weary. vague answer but you can help by giving us more details.
also how did she get into the meme debt of student loan? and how much? what is your mortgage? unironically, grats on your house, but for young and single guys like myself out there, live in a basement with ur parents or rent, make it with crypto which is inevitability as long as u make few good picks within 3-5 year.
>Paying tens of thousands of dollars for a post-college roastie
Wanna try that again my dude?
So you and your wife can just buy whatever you each want because its your own money, and whenever something is required to be split, you split.
What happens when it is something expensive, and one person has been buying more useless shit than the other? This is the problem of independent accounts. You get resentment. Because now one person HAS to pay more than the other. It is also a clear signal that you do not trust the other person and that you both do not understand what marriage is about.
what happens when one is a spender and the other is a saver
flipping a coin for divorce rape
unironically, you have her right under her thumb at the age of 22. your actully a smart guy. you know how to capitalize, and im abit envious minus the 39 year old part, unless shes like natalia pokonskaya tier.
but do tell us how the sex is and how the fuck did u get married & what ur and her peers thought?
split costs proportional to salaries.
never separate anything, especially if there are children in the mix.
yeah expect shes probably lying and just catering to your ideas in hopes to get married, which is ok btw. BUT what is her true face? or is she really that docile and just wasted 7 years without getting any perks or thought about getting her investment finally (you shackled up).
>split costs proportional to salaries. >never separate anything
> what is commonlaw Hate to tell you this, but should she ever want to leave and take half of your shit, you're married.
> If you need to have separate accounts in order to get along you have much larger issues at hand.
This is the most retarded thing I've ever heard.
She is not my wife, she is my partner. I don't really think there is any resentment, since we both make a pretty comfortable salary. We are europeans so I'm not even sure what expenses you are trying to bring up here, a car?
I'm sorry your laws work like that.
>She is not my wife, she is my partner. Trolling or just a faggy virtue signaling leftist?
I take it you have no kids.
Yeah we hate kids. Also no, the reason I'm saying that is because we are not officially married, she just has the legal rights any member of my family would have. I don't want to soil my image with shitty $30k glittering ceremonies and retarded shit like taking half my stuff if she decides she longer wants to be part of this.
I'm sure this will reach the USA one day, probably the same time full frontal nudity won't be rated as something indecent for children.
1. My wife signed a prenup. 2. She doesn't know about my cryptos. 3. She's an old fashioned country girl, no college, not very bright.
Getting married sucks, your wife will turn into an ungrateful bitch and you will be stuck holding the bags.
Been together 8 yrs, both work 40 hours a week, make about the same amount, both vehicles paid off, no debt except house, camper, and $4k for a new fence on a credit card.
rarely have issues about money, bills, or how it’s spent. We have 1 main account as well as 2 allowance accounts that we each get the same amount on each paycheck.
It works perfect for us. Allowance accounts have each other’s names on them, linked to our main account - but they are spending money for frivolous things outside of normal house, kids, bills, etc. I spend most of mine of clothes I want but don’t need, my foster kittens, and eating out for lunch at work. He generally spends his on video games, duck hunting / guns, and casino.
Has worked great for us. Never have to worry about overdrawing the bill account because we both wanted something at the same time - we always know what we have to spend and if we want something we think could/should be a main account purchase - we just run it by the other person and make sure the balance is there for it.
Tits or gtfo. You're just a neet man looking for attention.
good for you good job
My wife is a social worker and I work for my father's natural gas pipeline company. We each contribute half each for bills and agree to put 10% monthly income into retirement and another 5% into basic oh shit money/home renovation. The rest we keep as discretionary income.
She's 29 and makes roughly $50k a year while I'm 30 and make around $165k a year and we have no children yet.
I end up paying more for retirement and things but I definitely have much more to play around with. I don't tell her about my crypto portfolio because she honestly doesn't give a shit.
Marriage isn't perfect but I feel this system works pretty well for us now. When kids happen I'm sure it will change but I'm happy.
See But seriously getting married is pretty much the only way a couple who live in different countries can be together long term.
I'm not going to waste time responding to a troll. If you are actually serious, then I really do feel sorry for you. Have fun living in the 19th century.
Jelly much. No tits, but picture is my current litter foster kittens
Alright, fuck off LARPer.
Consider losing the meme beard.
We have two separate accounts and one shared for long term savings. We try to put 10% of whatever we make per month in the shared.
I handle home and most bills. She handles most food expenses and saves for vacations and bigger ticket items for our household.
It's a meme. Wife and I have sex once or twice a week and we go for at least an hour of penetration per session.
That's not a marriage, you're managing a roommate.
>Has a beard >must be a cool guy >definitely an individual
Craft beer, jerky, bicycle, artisan
sounds like your family will be a laughing stock in 5 years. Good job marrying down, user.
your dad owns a natural gas company and you're thinking of marrying a poor person. jesus i hope this is fake. what happens in 15 years if you decide you want to date other people? enjoy having half your wealth taken from you by someone you don't like anymore. jesus christ, you make me sick.
She's not poor, she's just a farmgirl. I don't know about your country but in the US at least farmers are pretty well off. Unless you mean she's "lower status" because she doesn't have a good goy paper (diploma).
I sleep well at night knowing retards like you won't reproduce.
the fact you said you havent had sex in a year and posted that funny looking op pic makes me think theres a 99% chance this is fake tho, but ppl are stupid so ya never know
yes, I was referring to education. I've never understood the appeal of appreciating low levels of intelligence
If you cant be ruthless in your advocation of your own self interest with her, the women you love, how will you do so for the sake of your future children. Most will not heed this advice but remember it when the worst happens. Briffaults law. look it up.
You need to not get legally married. No point plus you take a hit in taxes typically. Plus the half your shit meme is not a lie in your case due to the income disparity coupled with her debt itll be more. Have the ceremony buy the ring but dont go to the court house. She must be ok with not being legally married. If you a Euro or leaf she needs to pay rent to live in your house. Even if its a dollar written in contract legally binding. Paternity tests for your kids are non negotiable she needs to know or lie I dont care but have them done before you sign the papers at the hospital.
How much student loans does she have OP? You are liable for all of them if you are married. What happens when she gets pregnant? She will need time off now youre paying for her loans along with a child. She needs to have those paid off before you tie the knot. I mean paid off in full. Not plans to pay them off paid in full paid in full to the zero balance. The house must stay in your own name if your in the U.S. you need to look into a trust to protect any assets you might have. Set up a trust for your kids too even before you have them.
BE COLDLY LOGICAL, you are under the effects of the most powerful drug that humans can create without outside chemical help. You will react to this thinking it will drive her away, if it does its fine your the prize. However if she loves you as a lover and not a wallet she will be able to understand.
Lose the beard its fucking trash tier. Facial hair is fine but not that. You look like the zig zag man. Good luck OP protect yourself at all times. Marriage is the most vulnerable state a man can put himself in, in regards to male-female relationships.
"intelligent" women are much more work and more likely to cheat on you for tyrone
1. College education is no indicator of intelligence, lots of stupid fucking harpies have worthless papers in their name. 2. She's not mentally retarded, just below average. But she's quiet and submissive so she just follows what I say. 3. The meme that you have to throw your friends in the garbage and only talk to your wife for life is moronic. If I want stimulating conversation, I have my buddies.
I hate this modern soyboy belief that your wife has to be your equal.
/her pussy stinks and she has a hairy asshole. We get it OP.
What? Who were you meaning to respond to?
Hey man, sounds like you got it all figured out.
Don't have kids. You're a winner after all.
>Generally curious of the benefits of marriage. >Been dating same girl for 7 years, we're both debt-free and have no desire to have children. >Both agree marriage is a false institution designed to shill people into having children. We plan on splitting a house together and are both reasonably aware that things could go south for any reason. >so why get married? DESU if you don't want to commit to a marriage, don't commit to sharing a home. You'll become common-law married at that stage and what's yours is hers.
You. Her snatch is disgusting.
FWIW >I pay rent, most bills, buy most of the food >Because my wife has shit low-paying ($10-$12ph) jobs that she works 10-30hrs per week >Wife does a cute occasional token pay for a bill to feel special >I'm ok with it because she's attractive and puts up with me >I don't share any details about my income or financial situation with her >I know every penny she has >She actually likes it that way >She doesn't know we own our $400,000 home outright >She thinks we struggle to pay a mortgage >That mindset keeps her from wasting what little money she has on dumb shit It'll do for now. She's going to university to get an education for an actual career. We'll see.
>They have a kid together You mean SHE has a kid. There's a 50% chance it will not be his any more after court proceedings.
>He already won, cuck. His wife, the lawyers, and the court staff he will likely be paying in the future are the ones who have won.
what the fuck are you talking about?
We IDs here, faggot. I'm not OP.
>She doesn't know we own our $400,000 home outright
This may be the smartest fucking thing I've ever heard.