You have 24 hours to make $1000

24 hours to come up with $1000 or your kneecaps get shot. What do you do?

write $1000 on a piece of paper and bring a taser

Kek, please document this

I look like a schoolboy, so I'd probably fuck some old geezer from the bar.

Withdraw from bank account

Withdraw $1000

System Shock 3 confirmed?

invest my 100k in btc hope for a 1% increase + fees and sell

Rob a bank

Pull it out of my pocket?

Suck a lot of dicks. I'm female so it's okay. Wouldn't suck Veeky Forumstards though. I got standards after all.

But what would you do to get the money?

I'll give you half a bitcoin if you toss my salad

I already have $1000 so I don't need to make shit.

Suck 1000 dicks

Kek, actually a good one!

Sell my BTC before it drops to 5k.
Easy decision really.

in a row?

Suck 10000 dicks

vegine n bebz

suck 100000000000000000 dicks

Suck 10000000000000000000000000000 dicks

At once

(YOU)

Get kneecaps shot and live off disability.

Suck 1 dick

Suck them hunnit dicks fast !

Go to an ATM.

Put $100 on XLM.

Suck 1000 dicks for 1 dollar.

Take out 1k from my bank account.

Rob a convince store... best case senario, pay $1,000 debt

Worst case jail, where you’re safe from knee cap shooters

>already have $1000 in my bank
>instead i take out a $1000 loan
>buy cheap products then sell at higher prices
>end up with more than $1000 in cash
>use $500 of that money on gambling
>get even more money
>if all else fails, i got $1000 already in the bank + anything extra i get from the high sales and gambling

wow that was easy

you still owe $999 though

Shouldn't have been sucking dick on EtherDelta.

I've told this /devilish/ story before, but repeating since I know you'll all love it.

>retarded friend of mine joined crypto three months ago after I told him I made 100K
>he's not actually retarded, he's just slow and lacks common sense
>constantly refers to coins as companies and asks me which ones to buy
>I tell him and he sees some decent gains
>makes about 20K
>jealousy.exe
>call him up one day and tell him about this guy I met online
>says he knows a coin which will go up 1000x in a year but is charging 1 BTC to tell us the name of the coin
>I say I'll send him the emails of our conversation, while I blatantly edit them in the email textbox on the phone with him, and we'll split it 50-50
>within 30 minutes he's sent the 0.5 BTC to my address
>I say I got an email from the guy
>"the name of the coin is [insert randomly selected shitcoin outside of the top 100]"
>he goes apeshit and puts his remaining 10K into this coin
>coin doesn't do much, has slightly risen in satoshis but nothing else
>he's talking to banks about taking out a loan to buy more of this coin

In regards to your question, I was able to scam 0.5 BTC at it's peak (around 10K) from this guy. $1K would be no problem - all I would have to do would be to phone this guy with some other scheme I'll craft in five minutes.

uncool my G

>I'm female so its okay
No it isn't
Being a whore/prostitute is never permitted
Morally, you're like shit on the ground

That isn't devilish, you fucking idiot
You're just toying with a guys life savings, probably
And it's a guy who knows no better, clearly

You're a fucking faggot, is what I'm trying to say

>Scamming your own "friends"
Sickening

sharpie in pooper

Buy bulletproof knee pads. If I don’t make enough money sucking dick they’ll protect me.

Take out a cash advance on a credit card.

>scam someone because you cant make 20k because you dont follow your own advice

why not decrease your work load by 50% and increase the price price/bj 100% to $2.
thank me later with a freebee

I dont get you guys. You always say the only thing we're good for is blowing dicks. But once we do just that, the thing you say is our only use, we're worthless suddenly. Can't win with you people.

No, no no, women are good for raising a family, and all of that. You can't properly riase a family if you blow dicks regularly and have no moral compass cos #proudslut Twitter movement warped your pea brain

Raising family comes after securing financial gains though. You'll never make it if you start piling up those living costs

No? being a wholesome person comes before financial gain, or sexual conquest.
People with little can raise a family right, though its probably more difficult

Either way: sucking dicks for money = instant disqualification

Once a whore, always a whore

Holy shit, we got a genuine autist or a Muslim here.

Holy shit! we got a knitenight soyboy or cuckold

Fuck outta here little boy

>inb4 it actually goes 1000x

I'd start a go-fund-me and post it on all of my websites. I'm a hentai artist so, an emergency fund-raiser wouldn't even be that hard for me. I could only do this so many times, obviously, since my profit generally relies on the goodwill of my fanbase.

Ok Abdul. Don't beat your 3 wives too hard.

the m in muslim shouldnt be capitalized

Withdraw $1000 from my bank

/thread

How is anything i've said even remotely close to being a muslim?

is it really that controversial now to say women shouldn't be prostitutes or suck dick for money? lmao

you're a fucking beta whitenight imbecile

Funny how you call someone a white knight while also "protecting" some random anons mark and go on a moralist tirade.
According to autocorrect is should. Same with Jew, Christian, and other religious groups.

Ask my parents.

show one of ur art

>tfw I have less then 1000$ on my credit card account because of fear of identity theft
>tfw it's Saturday
well played OP

the fuck are you talking you retarded faggot
who did iI protect? I called a bitch a whore because she said she will suck dick for money

Then beta bucks the third comes in and starts caying "u must be muslim bro"

lol get the fuck outta here and go back to rplebddit you white knight faggot

Matter is neither created or destroyed. You just need to exchange $1000 of matter for $1000 of capital.

So not only autistic, but ADHD memory too

I put it all on a low cap coin or short.

Yeah, he's scamming his own "friend" you fucking retard

Honestly, in real life we all know you're some pathetic fucking faggot but it always makes me laugh how on the net you act as if you're anyone

Keep making us laugh, my white knight friend. You're hilarious!

whatever you say beta boy
no one is laughing with you, theyre laughing at you, lol

Fucking Northern Irish up their old tricks again OP

Quickly user! Someone wrote a story about fooling a friend! They need you to moralize at them!

He conned his own friend you fucking virgin faggot

Lmao in real life i can tell you're a queer whos voice trembles

>scamming your own friends is fine

It's you who is autistic, have some fucking integrity, this isn't even a question of life and death and you would already go this low you fucking retarded slut

If I'd have to start from scratch with 0 budget:

Legit way
> 1. make list of low comp business kw
> 2. use software to mass generate and rank youtube videos on low comp keywords for local business terms, video just saying "call number below"
> 3. some part of them will get into top 3 for some kw within a couple of hours, there's a trick to do that
> 4. make a list of businesses that I can sell the video placement to, since I can edit the description and put their number here
> 5. make a quick funnel explaining the concept, asking price is 100$
> 6. spend half of the remaining time cold calling part of the list, and the other half going around, physically making the offer in a really convincing way (I know how), offer SEO services as 200$/month upsell (maybe also other things, depending on the client), ask for payment within 24h (competition & limited offer fomo), carry around contracts that they can sign
> 7. if I spend every min working on this, I will have >1k within 24h pretty much guaranteed

Blackhat way
> it's better if I don't tell because some of you faggots might actually do it

>people actually got upset at my joke post
Imao, no wonder you can't get a gf. Autism isn't attractive no matter What /r9k/ tells you

lmao

get a knife from the kitchen and steal some kid's phone in the street

pics of feminine benis?