The Slav that saved Crypto

>The reptilians bow to the mighty Sminem
>At first contact aliens tried to merge with the human DNA, creating superior beings that would become masters of this planet.
>The first experiment failed, no single cell could harness the raw psychic power of the alien race. The cygote forcefully splitted in half in order to survive leaving the resultant offspring with deformed features, dividing the psionic power between two distinct entities.
>we refer to them as the Bogdanoff Twins.
> aware of the failure of their creation they desperately seek approval of the elder alien race by controlling humanity from the shadows.
> But then it came, the second experiment
>Successful melding of a single entity 200% Bog/human DNA. Less deformed features and much more powerful
>He doesn't own a home or have a single ruble to his name. Doesn't need it
>Contains all the DNA information of all life in every single cell of his body. He descends from every creature that ever lived, can generate offspring with any creature in the universe. He can create new life by merging DNA with his mind

>He is said to have 500+ IQ quantum brain but his mind working at 10% would warp the fabric of reality ending life on every being that has not a multidimensional nature.
>Being omnipotent and aware of the fact he has a gentle nature and tones down his psionic powers to a minimum to allow life to exist but is diminished to a 60IQ slav-tier intelligence in the process.
>His only goal is to bring happiness to all life
>The Bogs fear this creature and try to destroy him
>Sminem doesn't care, he enjoys the flowers and the little things in life knowing that he only needs to wait until the next heat death of the universe (has witnessed two)
>He mocks the twins by foiling their plan of bankrupting some Neets in an anonymous Cantonese basket weaving forum, just for fun
>for every Bog dump he provides a pump

>for every crash he provides a Bull run
> The time will come where Sminem will provide eternal green candles for all humanity ushering a new Golden Age of Mankind.

MINISTER YOU SMINEM

>The cygote forcefully splitted in half in order to survive leaving the resultant offspring with deformed features, dividing the psionic power between two distinct entities.
>we refer to them as the Bogdanoff Twins.

epic

fake news to protect the kid, here is the real image of him and his friend created for him to not be lonely

Cпacибo бoльшoe, Cминeм.

praise smegma

here is him too, made to crush the virgins and neets, just for fun. You can see how its working out. Please spread real truth, maybe we will be able to

would unironically fuck sminems sister

Well, you're shit out of luck, cus the sister is the one in red. GL HF

post the one with the bear caged