Best food to give nice solid dumps?

this might seem like a lazy troll or an unfunny cunt posting, but does anyone have recommendations for getting a good consistent defecation going?

i heard wheat and grains are good, but you can't eat those constantly that regularly imo, maybe thats just me.

I want type 3 regularly. Mine ranges through all of them. I think i need to get a more consistent diet.

mostly a consistant diet and finding out what works for you. your gut bacteria will change a lot from day to day and if you do things like eat meat for a week then all veggie for a week, you're going to have more problems with your digestion if you just ate a normal variety. You have to give your digestive system time to become acclimated to the kinds of food it is digesting.

Oatmeal or some other kind of whole grains are great for breakfast. For lunch, try making salads with loads of leafy greens like lettuce and rocket. You can roast/steam vegetables as a side dish for dinner - stuff like Brussels sprouts, cauliflower, and green beans among others.

tl;dr eat more fibre

Very spicy chicken wings, chased with prune juice.

After six hours, consume two bowls of Bran Buds mixed with yougurt.

Eat some cabbage and an apple.

Repeat for a year.

lots of vegetables, whole grains.

don't drink alcohol.

don't eat fast food.

keep meat intake down, except for when you go to bars, faggot

I eat Frosted Mini Wheats and a nice bowl of it gets me pooping pretty well.

Three things you can do upfront
1) is take a daily fiber supplement or add some fiber in the morning in the form of a bowl of whole grain oats, super-grain 18g grain bread toast with your other usual food.
2) Drink 8 glasses of water (adjust for caffeine).
3) Take a twice daily probiotic supplement such as Align.

Once you got your water intake down, regular amount of fiber, and gut flora back to recovery from diarrhea, cycle of dehydration, etc. You can start to address your actual diet and what you are eating, which is likely larger amounts, or binging if problems persist. Alcohol, food allergies and other irritants could need addressing. Don't even bother keeping a food log until you do 1-3 for a good month.

4 is literally the worst, its like fucking axle grease and takes half a roll of tp and then a shower to feel clean after. fuck you 4

>take a shit like #4
>it breaks in half as it's coming out
>other half won't come out no matter how hard I push
>have to stop pooping and feel a half-broken turd stuck in my ass until I need to take another dump

Man I love it when I get a huge #3 and it comes out perfectly clean.

One wipe and you are DONE.

OP, your nigger ass needs to eat some bread.

1-2 Tbs of this shit daily.

my shits have been pretty greasy and floaty lately, anyone now what this means?

hmm

what's the caffeine adjustment senpai just 8 oz per 8 oz?

>what's the caffeine adjustment senpai just 8 oz per 8 oz?
For alcohol, assume one glass per beer/cocktail to replace the water you used to process the toxins.
For caffeine, both a diuretic and colon stimulant, and lining irritant (acid) you could have some attributing factor to your gut symptoms. I would replace a glass of water for each caffeine serving to offset the extra urine production.

If you're constipated, you need to drink plenty of water and get some exercise. It doesn't matter how much fiber you're eating if there's not enough water to go with it. Movement helps with peristalsis, so even something like a brisk walk will help.

my negro

works like magic

I have consistent type 3-4 shits that slide out of my ass, requiring one wipe and do not smell. I eat a low carb/keto diet consisting of unsaturated vegetable oils, saturated animal fats, dairy, eggs, meats, nuts and seeds, plenty of vegetables, and occasional fresh fruit like berries (or whatever is in season) and avocados. I drink about 2 liters of water a day and 3 cups of coffee. I do not eat any cereal grains, pre-packaged prepared foods, refined flours or sugar. I have on average 1 alcoholic drink per week, though I am considering a daily glass of red wine. Basically, I do all my own cooking and only buy single ingredients. I use lots of herbs and spices in my cooking. I am fit and muscular with an ideal BMI. I get 1-2 hours of exercise daily. I am 40 years old, but look 25-30. I don't know which parts of my diet constitute my GI health or if overall they contribute. Hope this helps.

Not them, but I have an extra glass of water each time I have an espresso worth. So a medium/tall coffee usually has 2 espressos, remember that.

As for alcohol I do 2 per standard drink. Feels good to be hydrated.

Is 1-3 good?

I've been a consistent 1 and 2 for a while now. Took a probiotic supplement and I'm not at 2 and 3 regularly.

I meant to take my advice, #1, 2, 3 for a month. I think on your poop chart, the best thing you can do is a 3? You don't want it so hard you tear up and make some fissures. 1-2 is usually from binding quite early in the small intestine. 4 is too loose, so I think 3 is ideal. But, yea, in that post I was taking about my steps of advice.

Cup of plain, natural yogurt.
Add in 2 Tbsp. whole flax seed, 1 Tbsp. wheat germ, and 1 Tbsp. raw honey.

Mix together so everything is uniformly blended. Stay full for longer, and shit like a king.

Bananas although eating too much affects your heart.

In what way?

>tfw those times it comes out like thick soft serve ice cream and and you go to wipe but its so thick it just smears around endlessly

I can't imagine how this happens to people. You must not spread properly before sitting, or you get up long before you're actually finished pooping, if you're getting any kind of "smearing" problems.

Hyperkalemia.

How much is too much?
Would 1 a day be good?

That's probably fine. Eat it every other day if you're unsure.

Try not to eat 37 bananas, apparently.

Oatmeal gives me #7 without fail for some odd reason

I'm all over the chart at random.

Is this pasta?

Sometimes it even changes mid-shit.

eating too much grease and fat, or really unlikely of its also grey you have a disease of the colon

you'd have to eat a thousand retard!!!!!!!!! I hate when people spread this banana disinfo Jesus CHRIST

underrated post.

this happens to me every time but the last part that stays in me is always something mushy regardless of the consistency of the rest of my stool

I used to have this problem. Incomplete or stressful defecation due to the poor angle of the lower bowels and rectum can cause hemorrhoids, heart attacks, stroke, and even death. A good many people end up dying on the toilet from straining too hard to shit. When I realized my unnatural shitting posture was causing me undue stress and health risks, I stopped sitting on the toilet to take a dump. Now that I lay out newspaper on the bathroom floor and squat over it to crap. My bowel movements are always very smooth and complete. Clean up is a breeze because you can simply drop and flush the top sheet of newspaper. Financially, this is a very responsible method as well. Since my colon is more straightened and ass cheeks are naturally spread in the squatting position, my bowel movements are much less messy. I've saved lots of money using far less toilet paper and multiple flushes are all but unheard of for me now. Feels pretty good.

>tfw consistently a type 4 and type 6

I just want a solid turd.

What the fuck, user. Who even gets newspapers these days? Everything's online.

You probably shouldn't be flushing newspaper.

I hope you're disinfecting the floor after, too.

Just buy one of these.

>tfw anal fissures
>don't have to poop for 2 days
>the resulting product is so thick it leaves huge blots of blood on the toilet paper

How did you even get them to begin with?

tip a bin upside down. does the same thing

I have OCD and started wiping too much one day. From there it just got worse.