Pre-sex Vege meal

I have a girl coming over.

Problem is that she's a vegaterian.

What should I cook to get laid?

Raw onions and silt. works good mate.

just go out and pick up some shit off the ground

Steamed veggies with soup and some poison for good measure.
Alternatively,tie her to a chair and force feed her meat until her stomach distends and she can take no more,and then you fuck her.

Cook a big steak and don't give it to her

salty milk and coins

Good thinking,make her crave your meat by withholding meat.

Sometimes Veeky Forums is a special place.

on bekfast

Non-meme answer incoming.
You could cook vegan chili. It's just like regular chili, just that it includes lots of soy granulate, kidney beans and other vegetables (leek, carrots, corn) and it can be very, very good if done right.
Or make pizza.
Or falafel.

Meat in tube form.

A turnip that looks like a thingy :3

watermelon steaks

Following that train of thought, why not make an actual honest to God vegetable curry?

I hear they really enjoy mutton

You should just bend that stupid bitch over the table and give her Stockholm syndrome.

if its not today falafel with fatoush and tabouleh.
Way easier than it sounds.
If today, roast some beetroots (rub with oliveoil,alufoil around, oven), let cool, chop, throw together with decent feta, roasted walnuts (chopped), mint/parsley, lemon zest/chopped lemon/lemon juice, olive oil and bulgur.
Besides that you can throw 1-2 more things in without fucking it up, arugula/pine nuts/preserved lemon/ whatever.
Girls love it, its bright/sweet/hearty and the bulgur gets a nice red colour

Thanks mate, this sounds perfect.

Cooking with the girl, ya or nay? It could be something fun to do together, but it might also turn into a catastophe

Pasta primavera

I'll tell you the next time you repost this thread after it 404s

Im not really a date doctor though i can say from my own perspective that i prefer to cook in advance.
If the girl sucks at cooking it can quickly become weird, since she will feel useless/out of place, if that happens and you essentially have to cook alone for 1 1/2 hours while she waits it kinda sucks

Wine and or Vodka faggot

Food doesnt make you wanna fuck, that aphrodisiac shit is a meme to sell oysters

>"Oh Brad Pitt's here, I wish I was wet, I better eat some oysters (CM) (TM) they make me wet (TM)!"

Ever think it has more to do with a women finding it attractive that a guy can cook?

Potato pancakes

yeh i bet that's attractive... nothing sexier than a guy doing his feminine duties

then go and do her washing for her, there's something attractive about a guy who does the laundry ;)

>Cooking
>A feminine duty
Pick only one

Roast veggie tacos, beans and rice, pico, cheese, fresh margaritas.

It's simple, refreshing, easy to make, and makes you look worldly (because people are easy to impress with "ethnic food".

Nice meme

yeah not really sure what he's on about. Women like men who have their shit together. Men who can cook tend to have their shit together.

falafel

I have now actually seen everything. I kid you not.

falafel makes your breath smell like shit, bad idea. chili gives minor bad breath but you have a high potential of being gassy which is also bad.

you should just make her like a nice salad and some crab cakes. do vegetarians eat crab?

A fresh herb salad, water, and rohypnol.

>do vegetarians eat meat

Beetroot carpaccio
>Wrap beetroot in tinfoil
>cook in hot oven for 30 min
>peel and slice
>arrange on plate
>salt & peppar
>evoo
>crumble feta
>some peashoots
Wala

...

No. Only pescetarians eat seafood. It's basically vegetarian + seafood.
See, if she was vegan, you might have some trouble. Cooking vegetarian is fucking easy. Put your thinking cap on.

She is a Vegan, also probobly one of those white BLM protester types, I wouldn't go all out for her but make it look nice and don't let that bitch stay over, You don't want her friends coming over and You getting shot or robbed.

Soft fruit, a watermelon pumped with Vodka and frozen. Corona and Lime, You know get some shit You would also Enjoy, F it why not actually have fun.

Also some extra good Pastries, once You break her willpower, she will be far easier to "get loose".

Make ratatouille. Vegetarian, easy presentation, and it tastes good.

Kill yourself faggot. You already made the same thread last week.

Eat 10 lbs of lettuce and then shit in her mouth.

Alternative: have her eat 10 lbs of lettuce and then shit in your mouth

But he's not vegetarian, so that makes no sense.

epicly memed

I lost my shit