Food cringe threat- I'll start

Food cringe threat- I'll start

anybody remember this gold?

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youtube.com/watch?v=AnfOnueJ8SQ
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>Makes it wrong
>Give it low rating

haha what an idiot putting all that ketchup on his burger

Huh?

Raged instead of cringe. I fucking hate looking at a recipe that received low rates because holly homemaker decided to substitute something before trying the original then bitching because it didn't come out right especially in baked recipes.

>Be me
>24
>enjoying day of playin vidya
>just woke up from a nap
>Time for dinner
>Mom calls me upstairs
>Walk upstairs
>She made spaghetti
>I love spaghetti
>Eat, it's pretty good
>Notice something
>red bell peppers and onions in the sauce
>Get mad, throw plate on ground
>Go to room and cry to an hour
>Keep playing vidya

How do I get over my irrational dislike of vegetables? I don't think girls like guy's who are picky eaters...

Girls don't like 24 year old sons who still depend on their mother for sustience. Picky eating is lower on the shitty pile that is your life choices.

I don't understand these fucking people.

This is absolutely wrong. the issue with dating someone living with their mum is you fucking can't. Theyre normally too poor and going no where to manage a relationship. Personality wise? picky eating is far worse. Both can be fixed but no one besides the most autistic actually defend living with their parents as something that shouldn't be aspired to grow out of.

>Jumping on the autism train

I'm in college, working from home while I get ready to move out

I hate it, but it's cheap, and I pay rent and keep shit clean

Apologize to your fucking mom you mouth breather. Jesus christ. If I was your mother I would seriously consider killing myself.

>accuses me of jumping on the autism train
>replies to post with information that doesn't do anything but proves my point.

This isn't /b/ you dumb shits, quit taking the bait

>women in charge of following simple directions

holy fuck this looks exactly like a papa murphy's i used to work at. we didn't use shredded lettuce tho.

Most recipes on websites that have star ratings are submitted by Holly Homemaker in the first place. You're right about baked recipes though. Honestly women shouldn't be allowed to bake shit in the first place, it's a discipline completely unsuited to them despite their love of baked goods.

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mmmm tacos

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These photos are why I'm totally okay with robots taking over low-skill jobs such as fast-food preparation.

youtube.com/watch?v=AnfOnueJ8SQ

glad i haven't been to a fast food joint in probably a decade

Vomit

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this is why I like getting fast food from the carls jr. with the middle aged mexican ladies

>trump_playing_hearthstone.jpg

Triggered

I remember that the manager was called and given the restaurant location and time so someone definitely got fired...

>don't fuck with people's food

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>Taking photos that will ensure you'll never be employed ever again

i stab the eyes out, drain the water, put it in a bag and smash it against the wall
>works every time

I'm laughing at them...

But I don't know how to open a coconut without google ;_;

Also I want to see the pregnants puffy tits

if i have to eat fast food. i never eat at the ones close to high schools are colleges since they tend to hire the younger folk there.

>Theyre normally too poor and going no where
Yeah hence why they're also vagina repellant

>Americans in charge of following a recipe

Here's an actual conversation I had with someone once:

>and there's no dairy in this at all, user?
>"no. none."
>then how did you get it so creamy?!
>:: explains process ::
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>i tried it the way you said
>i added carrots and celery, swapped the garlic out for onion, used canned chickpeas instead of soaked-from-dry, omitted the olive oil and parsley, didn't cook it as long as you said and cooked the pasta separately instead of in with the bean broth
>it turned out horrible and not like the one you had me try!
>"so you didn't follow the directions i gave you /at all/, then?"
>i just told you i did! i just made some improvements. if you're not gonna give me the real recipe, why not just say so instead of being a dick!?
>"..."

I actively avoid people like that.

>stabbing the eyes
I use a drill or nail and hammer. Then, I smash it against the wall or ground outside and wash the shards clean under running water.

Sounds complicated and a pain in the ass. Why not this?

Complicated? You literally just poke a hole in it, drain the water and smash the fucker open. Going around it like in your pic is far more complicated, especially if you've got shaky hands.

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It's complicated because you have to go get tools from the garage which normally aren't in the kitchen. And even then all you did was get the liquid out. You still have to break the coconut.

What I posted takes less time than putting the bit in the drill. It takes literally no more than 5 seconds using what you already have in your kitchen.

>you have to go get tools from the garage which normally aren't in the kitchen
>not having a kitchen drill

Good job completely ignoring the part about the hammer and nail.
And also, as we all know, carefully rotating a coconut to smack it along its circumference in as straight of a line as possible is much, much easier than smashing the fucker against concrete. Thank you for clearing it up for us. That was kind of you. You're awesome and not at all dumb. Also, I am incapable of ever being sarcastic, so you know everything I'm saying is completely genuine. You're great and must be very well-liked and popular among your peers.

wtf?

i hate women now

Moar.

This seriously cant be real. A 5 year old understands the concept of a can opener. Nice bait though.

>Good job completely ignoring the part about the hammer and nail.

You keep a hammer and nails in the kitchen?

>>carefully rotating a coconut to smack it along its circumference in as straight of a line as possible is much, much easier than smashing the fucker against concrete.

It is, acutally. You don't ahve to be careful about it or follow a straight line. That's the whole fucking point. The coconut has a natural weak spot there. It will break there even if you're not precise...which is the whole reason why I'm suggesting this method. You'd already be done before you even walked outside to find concrete.

Why do you have this silly mistaken belief that what I am suggesting is difficult? That would defeat the point of recommending it you fool....

Both clips are from an old BBC show called The Restaurant, which wasn't particularly successful at the time and is almost impossible to find online.

>searching for concrete outside is a long, arduous journey that requires the aid of three elves, a halfling, two dwarves. a fighter, a mage and seven clerics, each wearing girdles of giant strength and seven league boots
What sort of shithole third-world country do you live in where concrete is some mystical substance rarer than chicken teeth?

It's also why I support the death penalty.

you try living on your own in the sf bay area on minimum wage, shithead

I didn't say it was an arduous journey, user. I said it took longer to walk outside than the literal 5 seconds it takes to open a coconut with a back of a knife.

I'm not sure why you're arguing with me here. I'm trying to help you, but you seem to be deliberately obstinate at every turn. Why do you think that is?

>i've never done it your way and also there is no way but The Way™ and I® am Its™ teacher
>also, concrete is totally not available just outside just about every window and doorway of any building where an internet connection would be found because concrete is a rare and magical substance forged by st glinglin in the deepest fires found in the depths of lake bourget

I am not him but do you really keep a hammer and nail in the kitchen?

>He doesn't keep a Hammer and nail in the kitchen as an essential tool

flyover go

I use a band saw to open my coconuts

I tie 3 coconuts to the back of my car and drive down the motorway until i hear them crack

dailymotion.com/video/xy4gkw_top-gear-handbrake_auto

i think that's A&W

source?

the average male is far worse

The fact the coconut is smaller than apple triggers me more than the whole scam pictures

>A 5 year old understands the concept of a can opener.
most people, including you, can't even use the butterfly can opener.

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i can but why would i?

they're double poverty tier

That tile has been in half the kitchens that I've been in.

>don't know what a butterfly can opener is
>look it up
>it's just a regular-ass can opener
Are you seriously claiming the majority of people you've met have no concept of how to use a regular-ass, every day can opener? What do they use instead?

nasa's choice

Opening cans is to much work. They just go to KFC or McD's.

But... that operates pretty much (or exactly) the same way as the other type, doesn't it?

Yes, I have no idea why he thinks otherwise.

[hard mode]

No, this is hard mode.

mostly the same except it has a sharp wheel instead of a fixed blade so you don't get arthritis after opening one can

Can we talk about what's going on ?

The /k/ of can openers.

you can't shove that one up your ass though. Not comfortably like

No but you can fit many at once, it makes for a fun competition.

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>holding object in palm and aiming knife at center of palm
>Why not this?
Common sense, dude. That's dangerous as hell. Every chef knows your fingertips have like a different recognition from the brain for sensation, why you tuck them in an arch while doing knife work on a cutting board.

I've been opening coconuts my whole life from my yard in the tropics, and like anything else, no matter what part of the world you go to, there will be stupid people doing stupid things and then more educated people who learn from the mistakes of others. Coconuts are finicky, some are semi-rotten, tougher, softer, plain beastly or just didn't dry right. I'd hazard to say that no two are the same. I poke the holes with a screwdriver and hammer to drain them. If they are not shucked or green, you can machete off the lid, but you put the thing on the ground until you get 3/4ths through it, and then use the knife like a wedge to lift that partial top.

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i don't see the problem

it looks like a clean way of serving mussels marinara without wasting all the delicious sauce and shit

also cheese

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is it burnt? i don't get it it

what's with the gaping hole?

1030 calories? Fucking hell.

Someone usually does when this pics comes up 3-4 times a day.

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Looks burnt to me too.

>>gaping hole
That's an ostrich. The gaping hole is the cavity.

I would try those, its surprising what weird things work well when made into a sausage.

He's overcooked it. That's why he looks pissed off

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NAH. you're supposed to go through one of the holes, cause it's thinner

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