What should i do with the fishes?

My neighbour has a pond with those fish. They're fucking expensive and 2 of them jumped out and died.

Fish can't experience love. It's just c-fibers firing.

lads, how do i get rid of these guys? i dont want them anymore but how do i transport them. i cant eat them, ive grown too attached.

how did you get them in there in the first place?

found em mate, was gonna fry em.

Let them go cuz carp tastes like shit.

sell on craigslist.

The only thing you can make out of carp is gifiltefish and even that tastes bad.

Physically impossible without image flipping, which is unlikely.

Flush them down the toilet. The sewers will make their muscles stronger and juicier.

Image flipping?

While I have trouble imagining what kind of sketchy underground software you might need to do something like that, assuming it's possible in the first place, it would be a willful manipulation of the data as intended to be represented by the camera manufacturer

You could go to jail for that, user

google 2 guys 1 carp

those don't look the same at all other than that they are white bathtubs

This is a fucking lie.

You can cut steaks out of them and braise them in a ceramic vessel with ginger, hot peppers, star anise, a little rice wine, etc until they're deliciously wonderfully browned and coated with the thickest sauce.

Literally anything would taste good cooked that way. Even salmon.

I have a pond nearby with about a billion of these things. They keep the mosquito population down and are really tame. Find a pond at a public park mate.

looks like marley brinx with blonde hair

But salmon would fall apart. (Some) Carp can hold up to being thoroughly browned in a pot, for a lengthy period of time. The steaks can be placed rather haphazardly with less risk of breaking, allowing you to cook a rather large chopped up fish (I've done a 12 lb snakehead).

You will never experience love either

I bet that's because you leave the skin on the carp and not on the salmon

are these the fish that nibble your feet?

It doesn't matter, the robot love dolls are coming soon. I can stimulate my own c-fibers, probably more effectively than any filthy, smelly human

What. Salmon is great. You just need a lot of salt and even the lowest grade salmon can be great. I braise it in low sodium soy sauce (because I use it too much) until it falls apart. I use it like bacon bits. Salads, omelets, even pancakes. It's great.

OP here, i thought tehse were catfish?

Did you catch them?

put a 24/7 webcam on them

I don't even..how did this even came about?

While the skin helps, this is untrue as well. Pretty sure carp is just a tougher fish. Of course there are several different types of salmon, and carp. So this is a stupid discussion.

>use crazy new reverse image search technology
>OP is a liar

excellent, excellent

no i found them

ive been busted, thanks for ruining the magic

What if they fuck?

What will you do if one lays 50000 eggs? You need to think about these things user.

proverbs 30:7-9 my man

Leviticus 11:9 to you my man

>I don't even..how did this even came about?

Look's like Bathtub Carp.

A traditional Polish custom, the Carp are bought before Christmas and kept alive in the bathtub for a week before being eaten for Christmas Dinner.

The custom is sadly on its way out as the downsides are not being able to bathe for a week and your kids getting attached to the bloody things and then crying all through Christmas because you have killed their new pet.

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas....everywhere you gooooo....

How long have they been their that you feel attached?

he was penus the fish
it happens

There's a tree in the Grand Hotel...one in the park as well...the sturdy kind that doesn't mind the snooooooow...

>They're fucking expensive and 2 of them jumped out and died.

Your neighbor must be a terrible owner for them to have committed suicide by jumping out.

Lmao are you Czech? My Czech girlfriend's family does this with shitty carp at Christmas time. No idea why Czechs eat that nasty fish.

Those are koi

These are carp

A fish is fine too

kek

You're just looking for an excuse to post that.
I feel that, though.

Gefilte fish

koi are carp. same-same

That is correct

Also correct.

feed them balls of corn meal for a about a week or longer if you can, drain the tub, hit them with a bat, fillet them, soak in milk
>discard the milk
and make a nice stew with potatoes, leeks, star anise and cream.

I thought you were fucking with me at first

doesnt being in a tiny bath tub stress the little guys out?

stress is just extra flavoring

animals dont have feelings user

>carp
>nasty
DELET THIS

One way to prepare carp is to soak cedar planks in water then bake the carp on the wood at about 350 for a half hour or so. Then, throw away the nasty carp and eat the planks.

Set them free.

>eating carp

Throw in a hairdryer. You know, make it look like an accident.

>Physically impossible

yeah, nah

Space program

After all they have experienced, do you really think they're ready?

there's a line of tiles at the end of the bath, the tiles are also smaller. is this bait or are you genuinely retarded?

>retard who doesn't understand simple illustrations
>calls others retard

every fucking time

My Slovak in-laws do this as well, I think it's common in Czech republic too. Pretty crazy.

I forgot about bathtub carp. And now I'm reminded.

WITNESSED
it's as if nobody else even sees it

This.

What a fucking loser.

At those times I'm really happy my Polish relatives left Europe before the war...

that is definitely not the same bathtub

WITNESSED

Jesus christ, you absolute madmen.

Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew

Carp are garbage fish. dont eat them

What is this newfound faggotry?

Keep them until they evolve into gyarados, then become undisputed lord of the oceans.

Fuck off.

Lurk more you dumb faggot. If you're going to subscribe to this level of autism on Veeky Forums, at least have the decency to say
>WA LA
or
>Fazoli's!

Keep them as pets. Carp are very loving and interactive.

Fun fact: to my knowledge, the preferred method of killing those things on Christmas in Poland is to keep them in the tub till they're practically suffocating and then throw them outside in the snow on the balcony/patio.

Came here just to post it, fpbp (fifth post best post) tbqh onii-fampais

What

This is my boy right here

What is that?

Does human flesh taste like fish?

Sleep with them.

Never heard of it I assume?

Nope, and I wish I hadn't. If only Hitler had finished the job.

Road kill dear. An user picked it up and butchered it in his bath tub.

Back to /b/ you fucking scrublord

What's wrong with it? Having the carp in clean water for a week is essentially a detox and removes the taste of mud from the fish.

Taking a bath with them, be a fish and tell us how it feel.