How to convince grandma her cooking is shit?

She cant even make fucking spaghetti right. I keep telling her I could show her how to make it hella better, but she disses me off each time telling me I dont know how to cook.

>Pic Related

just remind yourself she's going to die soon and can't taste for shit anymore

Get your own place

>hella

Just keep being the massive disappointment you've always been, she'll eventually die of shame.

Shes still got 20 years left at the least.

Well actually I was thinking suicide, but I at least want a decent meal from mt grandma before I kill myself.

Slip some Visine into her sweet tea.

Have you ever considered she purposefully cooks like shit hoping it will prompt your suicide, you worthless, selfish prick?

just put her in a home, they won't let her cook

Slap her in the face

I never considered that. How the fuck am I selfish? She cooks for 3 other people too. Im doing this for all of us.

The taste thing is real, OP. Just let her do her thing & get over it.

hit her with the pan and cook it yourself.

ProTip: Don't say anything, she's old, tell her it's good even if it's a lie, be kind with her. She will die soon anyway and the disgusting spaghetti will miss you.

She probably makes better food when your freeloading ungrateful ass isn't around

Oh and I hope you die before her so she will enjoy good spaghettis without a childish picky little asshole who complains about everything instead of being nice with the elders. You should be happy to have something to eat you mong.

She's your grandma, you little dicked pretentious cunt. Eat what she makes you. If you want her to know you can cook, try cooking for her once in a while.

>trying to tell old people that something they're doing is wrong

It's over, give up.


There isn't an option here.

You make me sad OP you can't imagine how I would pay to have bad food from my grandma. You are a monster and you should kill yourself. You are really childish

stab her in the throat. specifically the throat, not the neck.

OK fFeddy Mercury where is your lemon party and how does it go?

Don't try to be funny. You're not.

OP I just hope you will kill yourself.

Why talk? Just give her some tickets or something to spend time on and meanwhile cook for all 5 of you. Old life can be boring if you are an old poorfag.

Game in the back room where we're all throat stabbing. Captain Jack Sparrow is there.

What's the difference between your's and her's?

You don't.

Am I the only one that thinks that pasta looks fine? It's not fancy but it's spaghetti with tomato sauce. How bad could it be?

There's an inherent lack of spices, but it's certainly not going to hurt anything.

You keep your mouth shut and eat her cooking with a smile on your face you ungrateful prick.

You have no right to complain so long as you live under her roof.

Make it yourself then, you ungrateful little shit.

I don't understand the hostility here. You can be grateful for Grandma's cooking and still realize that it's not done very well. Since when is a legitimate criticism considered to be a lack of gratitude?

Grandma's lived through countless presidents, economics changes, and your endless whining

You're not gonna get her to change shit.

Because your grandma is apparently kind enough to cook for you and then you come on Veeky Forums to bitch about her.

I'm not the one doing the complaining user. I just don't understand how a valid criticism gets interpreted as a personal insult.

When I cook for people and I make a mistake I want them to tell me. How the fuck am I supposed to get better if everyone eats it with a smile on their face regardless of its actual quality?

>How to convince grandma her cooking is shit

I laughed harder than I should have.

No joke though, my grandma also cooks for the family, and whenever we don't unanimously agree that a new meal she made was good, she stops making it. She once made spaghetti with chicken, then she threw in mustard. Shit tasted fucking awful. I had to force myself to eat 2 plates of it. I was also the only one who hated it, but she stopped cooking it anyway.

Because by criticizing her, you're failing to show any gratitude for her apparent kindness in cooking for you in the first place.

It's like someone buying you a birthday present, and then you turning around and saying it's horrible, and that they should have got you something else. It's pure ungratefulness. Nobody is under any obligation to buy you anything.

It's grandma gawdammit. She's seen some shit. Now shut the fuck up and eat or get out. Fucking millennials.

If you got the energy to be criticizing grandma's cooking, then you probably weren't that hungry in the first place.

Just be glad that she makes food for you because she loves you and just not be a fucking asshole once.

Enjoy the moments that you have with her and don't complain about the fucking food.

Jesus christ..

Both of my grandfathers and one of my grandmas died fighting for Nazi Germany in the 1940s.

The one grandma I had left only ever cooked chicken soup for me because she was poor as fuck after the war.

And I loved it so much.

I hugged her every time she cooked it for me. Because I loved her.

And then she died. No more chicken soup from grandma. And something died inside of me.

Fuck you.

...

Not even trolling.

I miss her so much.

My dad built a house and she moved in about in the 70s.
She had her own home on the second floor and always made me "Sueppchen" (soupy or whatever you'd call it in english) and hug me when I went up there.

Now I only have a picture with her holding a 5 year old me in her hands.

She might have been a Nazi back in the days, but damn she loved her grandchildren with all of her heart.

>tfw Grandma is the worst chef I have ever seen
>tfw her problem is that she has some memory problems, but is very stubborn and refuses to use a written recipe
>she only makes 5 or so things, and has forgotten how to make most of them
>last time I visited for example she made spaghetti and meatballs
>she couldn't remember the meat needed for meatballs
>ended up smushing together some leftover kidney
>the spaghetti was soggy because she seemed to think it needed to be cooked, then soaked with a garden hose, then microwaved back to warmth
>a few months ago she made Lasagna
>kept putting on layers then forgetting what was on the previous layer
>put down cheese sauce
>then pasta sheets
>then cheese sauce
>then pasta sheets
>then pasta sheets
>then pasta sheets
>then pasta sheets
>then she dumped over a huge pile of kidney
>worst recipe and most sad was probably her ravioli
>she used to make it quite well
>now she takes dry spaghetti strings, 'hangs them' over a bowl, and hangs over wet lasagna sheets like a curtain on a washing line
>pours raw melted american cheese into the bowl and serves like this
>she isn't Italian btw
>tfw I can't stop eating in case she gets upset

Looks like your grandma was one of those old school "wife material" wife. Chances are she has been cooking the same shit spaghetti and meals for decades and your grandfather was saying it's great to appease the pussy. Your father or mother grew up eating that slop so they don't know any better. My grandma used to cook fucking amazing even with her alzheimers she never forgot how to cook because she cooked everything the same for 55 years. Sucks OP some people don't have grandmother's so they never experienced grandma's cooking, in your case your grandma cooks so fucking bad your disappointed. Blame your grandpa.

Fun fact: They can treat Alzheimers now.

Like the memories literally come back. It's a drug that has already been used for other things, so it will be on the market in like a year or so.

Wish this existed just a few years earlier. The last time I saw my grandma she literally had no idea who I was. She could barely remember who my mom was and had no idea that she was married with 4 children.

But I always appreciated it and thanked her when she cooked for us unlike the ungrateful millennial brat that OP is.

Iirc it's a drug that has been used to cure pain for menstruating girls. It's really weird that it can cure Alzheimers.
They're on the experimental stage for humans right now.

And yeah.. we share the pain of losing our grandparents. OP a shit.
My parents are also both above 70 right now and I hope that it can help them.
My dad already shows early stages of dementia.....

>my first memory is an israeli war veteran that married my german grandma after ww2 carrying me around in a park
>he protected me from all evil, knowing that i'd be a better german when i grew up

I'll always love you, Mr. Steinemann.

Fuck /pol/

Israel didn't exist during ww2 but nice try.

I'm drunk as fuck. He was a jew who had fled Nazi Germany and came back after the war, though.

I'm not lying. The rum is taking the best out of me right now.

I have pictures of him holding me in his hands.

>I'm drunk as fuck
No worries, I'll be there in a few hours. Your first post just looked a lot like bait.

You can come over if you actually want to party. I have a lot left :3

>grandma cant cook pasta

>OP doesnt have a grandma

Of course dude. Nazis
are people too.

Just cook yourself and ask her to help you. Doubles as bonding time and a chance to potentially impart some cooking knowledge to her.

No. Grandmas want to dote on their grandchildren. Eat the food say it's good, and then try really really hard to get her to let you do the dishes. That will probably fail too.

Why even make a thread for this?

If this were true, it would already be tested on humans, as it's already used on humans. You could just bribe your loli sister to fake menstrual pains and save good old granny

>Grandma never bothered teaching me how to cook
I think I did alright none
theless

MFW OP reminded me how much I miss my GamGam.

I know that feel bro...

how can you forget what layer it was when you can fucking see the previous layer before putting on any other layers?

How about jumping from a roof? After that she will eat without a disrepectful infant shitty picky eater...

Looks disgusting

>hella

respect your elders kid.