Cook for friend

>Cook for friend
>freshly caught trout with lemon and herbs, roasted root vegetables
>All he has is an ancient non-stick aluminium pan
>impossible to remove ancient grease from pan
>burns all food it comes into contact with
>he laughs at me for messing up the food (fish skin got a bit burnt)

>friend cooks for me
>buys cheapest stew meat
>melts margarine in nightmare pan
>over an inch of liquid fat in pan
>fries the stringy meat in liquid
>tough as boot sole
>puts on plate, floating in grease
>literally inedible
>somehow he eats it
>only prepared the meat
>nothing else
>gets very insulted when I mention he can't cook
>refuses to talk to me for weeks

Why do people do this?

How does a polar bear know what apples is?

This happened to me basically but my wife and I literally fucked his wife after he passed out. Leave for 3 years and come back with degree and you and your wife are slaying va Jay jay since we know how to fuck.

Never knew my best friends from high school were such shitty lays desu

> not baking it in foil or on a grill.

r u dum?

How do YOU know what a polar bear is?

Tiny oven, and had to choose between vegetables and fish. Didn't realize the pan situation was bad until after it was too late.

>>gets very insulted when I mention he can't cook
>>refuses to talk to me for weeks
>Why do people do this?
Are you asking why someone reacted poorly to your judgement and insults? If you respected your friend for more than cooking, you'd have instead just said that you can't eat that much fat yourself blahblah heartburn reasons or cholesterol reasons, whatever, and then taken him to dinner so he didn't have to eat it either. If he refused oh well, you were skipping dinner or eating later, and you wouldn't have acted like your friend was a piece of ignorant shit. /facepalm

aw you gotta be fucking kidding me

>if you respected your friend, you would lie and make up bullshit like a woman

Absolutely not.

What he made sounds a lot better than burnt fish. His house probably utterly smelled like disgusting burnt fish for weeks because of you.

If you knew how to actually cook real food with a man's pan instead of throwing pond scum fish and the animal feed you call vegetables that even an African wouldn't eat together with your ill concocted, ill suited weed and lemon concoction, he wouldn't have gotten so angry.

Please get good at cooking before making a thread like this again, dumbass.

HOW DOES POLAR BEAR KNOW WHAT APPLES IS

Apple's are in polar bear land

>>if you respected your friend, you would lie and make up bullshit like a woman
>Absolutely not.
There's a huge difference in not eating something you don't like and what you say about that, and then feeling the need to an adding an insult on top of it. If you think etiquette and common sense is bullshit, or misogyny on top of that, then you do have issues.

>make up excuse "you can't eat that much fat yourself blahblah heartburn reasons or cholesterol reasons, whatever," and then taken him to dinner

Yeah, sure sounds like a woman. What are you trying to prove?

I feel your pain user.

I lived with my aunt and uncle when I moved to a new city. Knowing that I just needed coffee, and was putting money before all other concerns, I bought a small can of cheap shit (Maxwell House) knowing I wasn't going to be there long, and as a courtesy to them, because they use gourmet beans. My aunt proceeds to give me shit about using cheap beans, and then makes a full pot of drip coffee with two tablespoons of her expensive grounds. I can almost look through the pot when it's done, and it tastes like African water. This same woman will make a gigantic pot of tomato sauce and acts like she's a gourmand because she stews down canned tomatoes and adds sugar and salt.

The only flavorful thing in her house was me, because of how salty I got hearing that shit.

He was probably fed apples before

>Blow a ton of cash to show off in front of friend who clearly doesn't give a fuck
>Angry when he doesn't have a kitchen beyond a pan he uses for everything
>Angry when he feeds me the same awful shit he eats
Who's idea was that?

Why? Apples are not its natural habitat.

>Apples are not its natural habitat
Polar Bears go as far south as Georgian Bay which have thousands of acres of apple trees.

trout is fucking gross, sorry you and your bf had a fight tho

Now, what I don't understand is... how do polar bears even know what apples look like? They live on pluto, and there's no apple trees past Saturn.

Should've taken the skin off, put a square of grease proof in the pan and oil on top of that to cook

>not just going to walmart or what ever and buying another pan

so you are stupid and a dick

Tasty treat?
Why wouldn't you feed an animal a healthy snack?
You realize you eat things that can't grow anywhere near were you live right?

>Trout is gross
You are gross
Trout is my favourite fish

Climate change is forcing them south.
They're evolving.

That last line

>not eating exclusively locally grown produce

>respecting your friend
>not telling the truth
this meme is getting out of control

Where the fuck do you live where root vegetables are expensive in september? They practically give them away right now.

Immigration is luring them south, breh. Them got a taste for swedish kebab too.

Trout is expensive as fuck unless you live near where they are fished
Plus you where totally showing off by making something so complicated, your friend did the absolute best thing he could do by refusing to feed your ego, if you made him grilled cheese he would have enjoyed it the same

Freshly caught trout dude. Freshly fucking caught. Even luxury stores don't sell freshly caught trout, and if they say they do they are lying to you.
We fished it ourselves.

>showing off by making something so complicated
a fish fried in a pan is about as simple as it comes you literal retart. Get fish, apply heat. Maybe some spice/condiments. The root vegetables are the same. Fucking apply heat.

I used ingredients which doesn't necessarily need a lot of manipulation for success (although you can make it complicated if you want to).
My friend chose an ingredient which needed a lot of manipulation to succeed. Stew meat becomes great when the connective tissue breaks down and it tenderizes, but it needs a long proper treatment for it to work. deep frying stew meat is the worst thing you could do, and completely ruins it. If you on top of that leave out all other components of a meal, leave out all spices/condiments, sides dishes and even drinks, of course the meal is going to fail.


>if you made him grilled cheese he would have enjoyed it the same
go fishing, get trout, then serve him something random with processed, cheap ingredients. He would be very insulted. Any human bean would be very insulted.

TV

Are you saying polar bears have TV too?

SHUT IT DOWN

They mostly watch David Attenborough. No worries.

No you're. A fuck you're such a fuck I wouldn't want a friend to ever do this