/KSG/ Kitchen Staff General

First Edition

This thread is for anyone working the food industry wether you work dishes or you're the big cheese in your kitchen, or even food, beverage and alcohol supplier, it doesn't matter, everyone is welcome here to talk, to read, learn and especially to banter the fuck out of eachother

Tell us what's new in your kitchen, what's the problem in your kitchen, who do you idolize, who's got the best Bants, who's a complete fuckwit.

I'm planning within a year to go to cooking school and work in the area of Montreal, any cooks out here living the big line life?

>Tell us what's new in your kitchen
i get to be 'fuckin' new guy' because i got put on venue 1 line

>what's the problem in your kitchen
3comp sink floor drain is slow, rolltop is medium-shitty on garde manger, fucking people slacking on requing out product they take from the main walkins.

>who do you idolize
2old4that

>who's got the best Bants
sous chef

>who's a complete fuckwit
you are

Cooking school? Why, just why. Don't bother. Do a little cokking at home, you'll be happier with that.

well, its a given that OP is always a fuckwit

We just had two nit picky old cunts for our recent health inspection. We passed, but got dinged for a bunch of little shit we didn't even know about. Last year we got 100% when it was a different inspector.

>cooking school
do your research bruh, unless you go to a good one with a couple of good chefs as teachers and that does stuff like externships, you'll just be throwing your money away for a piece of paper most folk will just laugh at. I'm not saying you gotta pony up the dosh for some well recognized and respected school, but make sure the school you go to has good community relations and shit. your actual best bet is to go to the canadian equivalent of a restaurant associations and get an internship through them or at least get a rec for a good school

im planning to go to the Pearsons school of Culinary arts, apparently they got even better relations with the surrounding community than the ITHQ because the cooks from the the ITHQ apparently will lift their noses on smaller jobs because they think they're better

I once got a picky inspector bitch who actually got down on her hands and knees with a fucking tape measure to see if shit was a full inch off the floor, when the bottom shelf was obviously a good five inches off the floor. same bitch tried to temp and ding us for chicken that was just marked on the grill and getting ready for the combi

>tell us what's new
I am the new guy so I don't know.
>what's the problem in your kitchen
They play this game where they show each other their balls
>who do you idolize
Ryan Reynolds
>Who's got the best Bants
The dishwasher, he's really insightful about life stuff
>Who's a complete fuckwit
Some cook O named Floyd

>same bitch tried to temp and ding us for chicken that was just marked on the grill and getting ready for the combi
are you fuckin kidding me dude

nope, the way we did chicken was mark it on the grill then onto a sheet tray to go in the steamer to finish up so it doesn't get dry. I had them on the sheet tray about to go to the combi/steamer and bitch temps them and tries to tell me they aren't done and tries to write it up. fortunately big boss was right there and he lit into her then called the health department to complain about her stupidity

yeah we have four combis in the back for banquets that do hundreds of chicken tittys like that, i'm just amazed that someone could be a health inspector and have no functional awareness of the cooking process.

fortunately that's the last we ever saw of her, I imagine we weren't the only ones who complained about her and she got fired

So I have a trial shift as a Kitchen Porter in wagamama coming up. How do I not get in the way? Anybody here a KP with pointers?

best pointer I can give you is to realize kitchen porter is just a polite way of saying kitchen bitch. you're literally everyones bitch, bants are fine and all but when told to do or get something you do/get it right away,

I just applied somewhere for a kitchen porter job, but gmail fucked me, so they never contacated me back. For the first time ever, gmail sent the email under an old nickname I haven't used in a long time. I must have used it with some other google service at some point. Fucking faggots.

Fuck

don't worry, once you prove you're not an asshat, things will ease up a bit, and they'll even start teaching you shit

at my property the porter is responsible for all the stock goods and the stewards are the kitchen bitches in addition to being the dishwashers.

>tfw the most based Expo is leaving soon

Got a job at a chinese kitchen down the road. washing dishes, prepping, and frying. The work is hard but learning alot, problem is the "chef" is a fucking asshole. Not in the normal way but in the name calling micromanaging way, dunno if I should find a job working with other white people or just deal with him until school starts back up in Jan..

Prep guy here.
Working part-time while I go to college.
It's not bad, my co-workers are usually polite and fun to be around.

The new dish guy is a retard, though. He came in stoned as shit, then dropped and shattered an entire stack of plates. Come on, dude. Have some self-respect.

>Tell us what's new in your kitchen
Mop.
>what's the problem in your kitchen
All the BoH are leaving the kitchen is falling apart
>>who do you idolize
Jeffrey Dahmer
>who's got the best Bants
Head Chef
>who's a complete fuckwit
Me

Just have a bounce in your step. Show you are game for working and they will teach you the rest

I work line in a japanese noodle/don place and all the people talking about their jokey/vulgar kitchen staff is so foreign to me, japanese are so intensly professional, if my phone leaves my pocket before the shift is over I get reprimanded

Kyle?

At my old job if they saw you with your phone out you'd get fired on the spot. Quit that within a month due to overbearing, power-tripping supervisors [read: middle aged men who are making 30k a year and have no room for promotion] anyway

my property needs to have this enforced. fucking put your phone away if you're not getting/using pictures of plating or recipes. work-related functions are perfectly acceptable by me, but fuck you if you're on facecuck at your station i'm gunning for your job. my phone stays in my locker downstairs.

Just finished a 10 hour shift and tired as fuck. Going to sleep sweaty and stinky. Not even gonna shower. Fuck it.

lol good movie.

>last job was bartending work at a sailing club, literally just chilling out, cooking sausages and serving beers/gnts/dark and stormies to old sailors

>tfw starting work at university bar monday

>Tell us what's new in your kitchen
A small red handled corer, and I'm fucking glad to see it. No more coring shit with paring knives all day long
>what's the problem in your kitchen
Understaffed as fuck
>who do you idolize
Nobody comes to mind
>who's got the best Bants
me
>who's a complete fuckwit.
me

>Tell us what's new in your kitchen,
New Sous, from Corsica but mainly worked in Paris

>what's the problem in your kitchen
No real major ones. Overall organization isn't where I want it, but we have been running without a sous since I showed up (6 weeks ago or so), so we should get that stowed quite quickly

>who do you idolize
I put on my superhero costume every single day

>who's got the best Bants,
Female owner/head chef, so no real bants. Quite a feel good airy fairy affair, but probably me, or the Samoan guy on larder. I also speak french, so I bant a little in french with the new sous though we have to knock it off because then he reverts to french during service and it can fuck with service coms.

>who's a complete fuckwit.
Me, of course.

Wearing that cape backwards like a real hero

>Tell us what's new in your kitchen
Fancy new soup rethermalizer, and a few samples from local breweries
>what's the problem in your kitchen
Dishwasher is leaking and the exhaust hoods don't work as well as they should when we use our whole 12 foot charcoal BBQ
>who do you idolize
I'm a typical Bourdain fanboy
>who's got the best Bants
Excluding me, either the grill guy or the little female sous
>who's a complete fuckwit.
The dishwasher we are trying to train for prep/running or the part time night cleaner

i used to cook on commercial fishing boats, does it count?

>Tell us what's new in your kitchen
Im new, ive wprked 3 shifts now in a peri-peri kitchen. Absolutely loving it, easy as fuck.

>what's the problem in your kitchen
inexperianced chef on the pass, drives me nuts! He/She dont know what tables need what and when they need it! The head chef should be working that position!

>who do you idolize
my head chef at my last job he's a "mother fucker" like me.

>who's got the best Bants
Me but they dont know it yet, everyone else is boring as shit

>who's a complete fuckwit
OP obviously and chef on pass

This!
Big time THIS!
I've never been asked for any qualifications! (First Aid helps though)
Just need exp usually

Show them the GOAT!

worked at chilis about 20 years ago. Friend served his bandaid in someone's fries.

If you pay close attention when eating out you can find a hair in about 1/10 of the meals you order.

I am going to use that.

Also
>implying superman isn't the one rocking it backwards

whats the life like im trying to get on a gig like that. i love the ocean and i dont get sea sick unles its super rough

What a cunt

>what's new in your kitchen
Made the change from shift 3 to shift 2. Didn't think I could hate my life any worse.
Also, insurance company made us take out 3~4 feet of shelving so we could have a legit eye wash station instead of one just attached to the sink. Everything is a little squished now.
>what's the problem in your kitchen
Lack of squeeze bottles for sauces. Rotating them takes an hour. So almost no one bothers anymore, which is kinda gross.
>who do you idolize
They're all idiots in their own little ways
>who's got the best Bants
Shift one lead. She's gotta deal with the most amount of fuckwits.
>who's a complete fuckwit
probably shift 3 prep. Has a legit hearing disorder, which makes me feel slightly less bad for yelling at him


Also, trying to lose weight, but working with so much fresh good stuff makes my stomach growl like nothing else by the time lunch/end of shift comes around. Any tips?

Is everything legit frozen and you just microwave?