/KSG/ Kitchen Staff General

From what I heard, you can come from any walk of life and work in a kitchen, but the kitchen has its class system, you'll start at the very bottom rung of the ladder and work up, that's how it's been for nearly a thousand years

you did what???

how do autismos like you even work in a kitchen?

he's memeing you guys

whatscookingamerica.net/Information/SandingCastIron.htm

Is there an /Industry/ General so everyone in the industry can shitpost?

>What's new in your kitchen
Not much is new in the kitchen, but we got a couple new servers up front. One's some dumpy trashy broad and the others some older dude. Older dude seems cool. Haven't really talked to the dumpy trashy broad. I've also been getting some dish/prep shifts at my boss's other restaurant, which is a fancy fine dining spot. Never worked or even eaten fine dining before, so it's a pretty cool experience. I like getting to sample all of the deliciousness.
> Anything interesting happened during your previous shift
Some fag in the dining room was bitching about dumb shit just to be an asshole. That's a pretty common occurrence though. Another reason I'm glad I don't work FOH.
>Tell us about the damned health inspectors
I already posted about them in a previous thread, so I'll just skip this one.
>Who's got the best Bants
Prep guy, but unfortunately his shifts only coincide with mine for a few hours. Sous chef is second best.
>Who's the moron in your kitchen
We got a dude that thinks he's the best at everything even though he's just okay. It's pretty comical sometimes.
>Who's the genius in your kitchen
Sous chef. Comes up with most our recipes.Keeps it simple for the line while also tasting great.

>taking dish sink apart
>involves washing the pieces, soaking them in sanitizer, then putting them back in once the sink's empty and disinfected
>30-something co-worker calls me over, says there's something wrong with one of the parts, she's freaking out
>come look
>she thought the part was broken because it didn't line up with the contours of the sink, but it's just on the wrong side
>turn it around and it fits
>she turns bright red and can't stop laughing for 10 minutes

>work fast food
>customer comes through
>says we messed up his order, he wanted his combo without sauce
>combo number he ordered doesn't come with sauce
>then says it wasn't sauce, it was lettuce he didn't want
>asks to speak to a manager
>manager hops on the mic with a deep (normal) voice, tells him to come on up to the window
>dude just drives straight through at high speed
>pretty clear he was trying to con us into giving him free food but he fucked up

shit stories but these are from yesterday

This is it buddy

guy in picture has poor knife skills

Staff in my Mc Donalds wanted to demote themselves and they were forced to think otherwise.

explain!

On vacation currently. Leaving for work here in like 2 weeks...for about 4 week i travel and do private chef type stuff. Boss just bought a new kitchen i get the first run with. Pretty excited. Pic related

Shit sorry pic related

Happens more often than you'd think
We had a restaurant in my city where the owner was a real character, an old flaming homo hitting on men in front of their dates/wives for the keks

Usually when he served desert, he'd come with a colossal dildo covered with chantilly and tried to force it down the guys throat.

It was usually a riot for the other customers

They didn't want the extra responsibility for an extra 40p an hour so they wanted to demote themselves. This would have left us with 1 full time crew trainer, so it was either they stay or leave.

Bumping the thread back to life so it doesnt go to page ten with less posts than the original thread

Keep posting fellahs

its..... sooo...... clean!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I work with a real pos who seriously fucks up everything. Hes always bragging about how he was a fucking 5 star chef for Carnival Cruise Lines yet he can't even make a simple marinara without fucking it up. Rumor going around is that this guy must have some juicy dirt on the owners because they refuse to fire him no matter how much shit he pulls or how much product he destroys. Gonna greentext now because I'm rambling.

>last night
>new kid training as a dishwasher
>nice kid, never worked in a kitchen before
>coworker showing him how to mop the dishpit since he says he's never done it
>pos is in charge of kitchen tonight, meaning it's his responsibility to mop up the kitchen after we close
>literally 10 minutes after we shut the doors
>"I don't have time to wait for this kid to mop I'm fucking leaving, one of you guys do it"
>clocks out and leaves
>we all finish up and leave about 20 mins later
>pos is sitting on the curb outside because his wife is late picking him up
>lazy fuck knew that and still left
>drove by again 30 mins later after chatting with coworkers
>he's still fucking there

Shit, the things I would do to work in that kitchen.

We have a new chef in recently and she pisses me off every night. I work garde and last night I had to stay for an extra hour to properly scrub ice all the oysters in house because the guy working raw bar couldn't be arsed, and apparently if he doesn't want to do it, it's my job. Opened today too. Chef, of course, could care less.

Thank god our tournant has excellent bants and works literally across from me on grill, otherwise I would have gone insane long ago.

How hard is it to get work at Carnival Cruise line

New guy who was always talking about his consulting gigs already quit. Made it about a week before he decided to fuck us. He was slow and chatty anyways.

>Tfw this might be me
I'm do you have any pointers for how to survive if I want to get good at cooking in a restaurant? Where should I apply at, chain places like Olive Garden or legit local restaurants (keeping in mind I actually live in Columbus Ohio so there's not a whole lot of culinary art here)

I'm a dishwasher. Does that count?

Nigga, the dishwasher is the backbone of it all. I've worked from it up. Fuck anyone that tells you otherwise.

Sort of reminds me of when co-workers get off early and just sit at the bar.

DISHWASHING IS A NIGHTMARE. THANK YOU TO THE BRAVE SOULS WHO BRAVE THE STORM OF DISHSOAP AND MONOTONY.

Just like said, you are the backbone of the operation and anyone who has done it should have deep respect for you.

Time for dishwasher stories
>Get to work
>Night shift so some guy was just here
>Okay let's see what we got
>He left early and hadn't even finished the dishes that were there for him
>The garbage is full
>There's not enough clean plates for orders
>Cutlery inside the machine so I gotta dig it out by sticking my arm deep in there
>It's leaking because he fucked up and put shit on a pipe that was loose
>Have to fish out the cutlery, fix the pipe, get rid of the garbage, put clean plates were they need to be, do the load of dishes that are already there
>Do it in 10 minutes by rushing super fast, in unbelievable speed (kitchen manager even noticed)

>Get yelled at by drunk manager anyways
I FUCKING HATE THAT GUY. Always be courteous, take out your trash and leave a clean station for whoever is on a shift after you, fucking hell how hard is that for some fucks to understand.

Good dishwashers should be treated like kings. Once had a washer who could barely handle the load for our prep crew. Pit was stacked sky high with equipment we needed while he was spending hours on one prep job. It was a nightmare. Now we have a guy who always keeps a clear pit and is always asking the sous if there are any extra jobs he can do. I always thank him for the hard work after every shift (although I wish he would help a little with taking our the garbage and sweeping at the end of the shift..)
I wish I learned more about dishwashing before I left to go to school and learn cooking. My more experienced co-workers would be the ones to change the cleaning supplies or fix the machine if it ever broke down, and they never bothered to teach me. Still, the eye for cleanliness and attitude transferred to my cooking so I learned what I needed to..I guess.

Worked with a dishwasher in Canada who would frequently transgress the line from bantz to full on verbal assault. He did it to everyone. The GM, The owner who used to fuck up expo but could also bench 200lb and nail 18 year old waitresses at 45 years. Chef who was an easy 6'4 and cooked for G20 banquets. Anyone at all.

They kept firing him for going overboard and then offering his job back if he 'promised to clean his act up'. He never did. They kept rehiring him.

Shit like the staff being pricks during overnights makes me hate working at Mc Donalds. I wanted to fucking strangle one of the dudes who worked there over him trying to tell him how to do my job when all he was doing was standing there and talking after the crowds had left. I'm older and more experienced the ugly fuck threatened to punch me in the face because the sink wasn't filled with soapy water when you can't wash shit in a dirty sink that needs to be cleaned first. He then went and got one of the managers to berate me over it, but did they even listen to me? Heck no, a bunch of assholes every single one of them.

Just curious, do the cooks in McDonalds prepare anything or is everything bought in pre chopped?

Everything is pre-made and comes from second and third world countries. Nothing is fresh, everything is frozen and thawed for an hour or two and then used. Iceland tier food.

Iceland the UK supermarket, not the country btw.

Got a trial run at a restaurant for two hours during the lunch period. They didn't really give me any instructions so I'm not sure if they'll give me a run down beforehand or just throw me in the deep end.

Any advice? I'd be great if I could nail this job so any help is appreciated.

What kind of restaurant is it? Where are they putting you? Porter?

It's a small Japanese fusion place. Gonna be on wait staff as far as I know.

You'll need to be fast on your feet, make sure you wear the right type of shoes so you don't slip. And be overall nice to people. Are they giving you a uniform?

Just told to wear black

His wife was late, huh?
Wonder why

All black? If so make sure it's a good black shirt and trousers,

Good to know. Thanks for the tips

Is there a Bar Staff General ever?

Na they are too busy getting loads of tips and pussy to create a general

Do you think you need to be a masochist to work in the industry?

OP here, anyone in the cooking industry, Wait staff, Bar staff, Delivery guys, even the people in food production and suppliers are welcome here, it's one big family having to deal with all the people

I was in the back kitchen tonight, tending the ovens and doing dishwash. I have big respect for you guys, i did pot wash for a few years at a university before I caught a break as a chef.
Do you plan on moving up?

>I have big respect for you guys

Not the nigga your talking too, but cheers all the same lad

Hey! I am studying psych at uni and worked as a dishwasher for like a year, now I'm a line cook at a greek restaurant while still in school.

>What's new in your kitchen?
The dishwasher
>Anything interesting happened during your previous shift?
Boss had me intentionally call the black cook by another black cooks name as a joke, shit was pretty funny and he took it pretty well.
>Tell us about the damned health inspectors.
Yet to meet em'
>Who's got the best Bants?
The owner, a 6' 4" 300+ lb Spartan Greek man who always gets a kick out of busting everyone's balls
>Who's the moron in your kitchen?
Not counting the dishwasher, probably me, I'm only a month or so in.
Who's the genius in your kitchen?
Probably the 90+ year old deaf greek man who is also slowly going senile, so maybe he was but he's been cooking a long time, 20 years at this restaurant alone, when asked how long he had been cooking his response was to laugh and say "Too old"

>TFW you run out of bleach for 2 days the dishwashers and the cleaning staff dont say a word and you are do for a health inspection any day

Like what the fuck guys the owner is talking about you guys in a bad type of way

What's the sketchiest shit you've had to hide for a health inspection?
>working at shitty hole in the wall pizza place
>just finished doing morning shot of heroin inside the kitchen
>knock on the door
>look out window
>oh fuck, it's the health inspector
>hide spoon and needle in pocket
>wipe off tiny patch of blood on arm where the injection happened
>let health inspector in and end up passing
A different inspector also found ghetto bongs in the box room once at the same place.

>a chef prepping drops food on the floor
>confront him about it and ask him if he would personally eat it
>he says no as he puts it back on the table to use
>point out his bs and tell him to throw it away
>blood is boiling at this point, have zero fucking tolerance for these shitheels
>refuses to and tells me it's none of my buisiness
>blow my top off and call his ass out infront of everybody
>considering on telling management or corporate to get his ass fired

I cannot stand cocksuckers that do low things like dropping utensils, cross contaminating and other vile shit to people's food. They're the reason why I refuse to eat out on most occasions. I have to stop what I'm doing, watch and babysit a few retards on the line and tell them not to be retards as they pick up a tong or whatever off the floor to use again without washing.

You have guts for standing up to your chef like that. No one would even try that shit in our place although he's not a dipshit to do things like picking food off the floor and serving it

Blood stupid, we were told that reporters were visiting our Mc Donalds here in Belfast and it turned out to be a bunch of bloggers. They showed them around the place like it was the big cheese. Top management (regional) even showed them around when literally anybody could have done that.

Anyone else get random bloggers visiting your restaurant?

Oh man if I had my own restaurant I'd make a special for bloggers and do like in South Park, fuck what anyone says

Better hope you have impressed them, mate. A hand full of words on the blogosphere and McDonalds is a gonner

I just started ashing dishes a few days ago, I swear some of the shit that goes on makes me question my sanity, but all the dudes in the kitchen seem cool, i've literally never not worked with human garbage so it's a nice change of pace.

>implying McDonalds isnt already a gonner

Well they let them make the food themselves and they got it all for free

They'll be making a post/article so we'll see soon. Wonder if I'll be in it. Probably not as they were on the other side of the kitchen.

I work at a michelin starred restaurant and we pick shit we drop on the floor all the time, as long as it has a non-sticky surface, and hasn't hanged there for longer than a few seconds. I would never serve something I wouldn't eat to a diner, but then again, I'm very carefree about what I'd eat.

No one really gives much of a shit.

We don't use food that fell on the floor, but we do keep using towels that dropped on the ground which is probably just as bad.

They don't even pay the crew trainers at the store I worked at most the time lol
Franchisee was an pathetic scrounge who has no conscious thefting young underpaid people.

>I work at a michelin starred restaurant and we pick shit we drop on the floor all the time, as long as it has a non-sticky surface, and hasn't hanged there for longer than a few seconds.

In the likely event that this is true. This and you are quite pathetic tbqh.

>This and you are quite pathetic tbqh
What did he mean by this

So I've thought my whole life.

>head Chef for food production facility
>server crashed last week, tech dudes can't fucking fix it
>billing is frozen
>no money coming in
>placing smallest possible orders from vendors on a day by day basis
>vendors stop taking our checks
>now purchasing food from market and retail on a daily basis
>over $150,000 behind on billing
>nobody is getting paid on time
>rally the staff
>15,000 meals produced this week
>no errors
>50 hours in, no days off this week
>my birthday is tomorrow

Happy fucking birthday to me.

>be dish bitch
>new hire comes in tonight
>walks out as soon as rush starts
>have to close alone because he was the only other bitch scheduled and no one answers their phones but me
>mfw this is the 3rd time this happened this week alone
>mfw i started 7 months ago and consistently work 70-80 hours since
>mfw i open and close six days a week
Love the ot checks and tips but I blow it all on cocaine and red bull
why is everyone a pussy? it's just dishes jesus

yeah a dishwasher who shows up on time and actually does a good job will become the overtime master

I just don't understand what people think when they apply for the job. You're really going to bail as soon as it picks up? It's a 5 star steakhouse, dd you think it was going to be a cakewalk? I just hope I can work my way onto the line, I already do prep in addition to dish bitch duties. All my line experience is Denny's and Applebee's and a mom and pop diner so I am just happy to be bitch atm until I can prove myself but in the meantime I pray for a Mexican to get hired, while I work like one

No errors

Hahaha

Don't pay them at all or don't pay them any extra?

Mmmmmmmmmmmm......those new orange mats. Like walking on clouds.

None reported. One of the new guys did over-salt a tiny batch of beans and rice, but it was still good. I'm not counting that.

>What's new in your kitchen?
Some large deep pots and round circular pastry dishes, been making some great frittatas in the dishes and blanching stuff for salads in the pots

>Anything interesting happened during your previous shift?
Met a cute nurse who's a regular and seems interested

>Tell us about the damned health inspectors.
They're not bad, not very nice people but I keep my kitchen clean and follow all food safety rules (I don't actually know them but I just use common sense) they visit every 2-3 months and I've never been picked up on anything other than things out of my control like floors being unsealed or a broken tile etc

>Who's got the best Bants?
Me I guess, I'm the only one in the kitchen.

>Who's the moron in your kitchen?
>Who's the genius in your kitchen?
See above

I'm kind of interested in potentially joining a larger kitchen, would be nice to not have to run and manage the kitchen by myself and just have a chill station sort of job where I'm told what to do, but then again I enjoy the solitude of working alone

>Tech dudes can't fix it
Bullshit, are they in-house or do you contract them? Unless your server is physically broken any self respecting firm would at least be able to restore the server and get the back-up on there

Unless these guys are el cheapo and didn't do a backup for whatever reason

sous at a fine dining establishment on one of the 'merican coasts.. had to frestyle a dish to put on the tasting menu today.

how'd i do, lads?

>pork belly braised in mire poix/hard apple cider
>cut into 1/2" thick slices, dredged in a rice flour/tapioca starch/cornstarch dredge and fried
>braising liquid reduced and turned into a gastrique with apple cider vin/sugar, and bloomed mustard seed
>crispy belly tossed in gastrique
>gastrique plated on the plate
>parsley cream plated on the plate (shallot/garlic/cream slowly heated til veg are soft, fresh parsley and mint blanched and shocked in ice bath, both combined in blender with salt/sherry vin/maple syrup/salt/lemon juice, then strained through a chinoise)
>parsley root slowly simmered in milk/thyme, then blended with mascarpone/salt/sherry
>celery root/petite carrots/fennel pickled in aple cider vinegar
>carrots roasted in just olive oil/salt/pepper
>watermelon radish
>pea vine tendrils

how'd i do, bros?

Did your parents ever tell you that they loved you and were proud of you?

yeah, my mom is pretty supportive.

why?

i'm pretty trashed, so sorry for the redundancy in my need for approval.

here's a previous dish i've plated that i like, i guess

From what I could understand that sounds amazing

>tfw have to clean the mac and cheese pot

How did it taste like? Fried braised pork belly is always a winner but I'm not sure how the other flavors will matched up. Looks like I've gotta try it out in the kitchen today

The plate is wayyy to big for a tiny dish like that

just wait, someone will call in sick during a busy time, or someone will move on and there will be an opening, and the boss already knows that you show up, work hard, and aren't an idiot, so he's more likely to go with the option of training you rather than hire some unknown quantity

the plate can always be bigger, you know how it is

yeah they're nice unless you're the dish bitch who gets to pick em up and hose em off every night

it worked really well.. texturally, it was fatty/meaty/crunchy/creamy, hot/cold, lots of contrast.

the herbaciousness of the parsley/mint cream with the pickled root veg offset the fatty/sweet pork belly nicely. i originally wanted it to be just a vegetarian dish, but we already had a veggie risotto on the tasting menu as the course following this.

is it, though?

Uh today I happened to get promoted to sous which is awesome and shit haha good bye to anything outside of work.

Nice, have fun ordering people around

>New in the kitchen
We finally got a sushi guy after 2 years of not having one. Japanese dude who rolls sushi faster than Snoop rolls blunts.
>Interesting shit happen
We have kittens out back and they are very cute, I got to pet one earlier tonight without it running away.
>Health inspectors
Knock on wood they never really look at me too closely. I'm the baker and my area is always clean, and I don't really work with anything all that perishable or hazardous bacteria-wise so they just kind of look my shit over and move on.
>Bants
All of us have our moments. The kitchen manager is great at stupid puns, head chef is great at innuendo, the old guy who opens the place at 6am has infinite stories and jokes to tell. I'm just clever as fuck when I'm in a good mood.
>Moron in the kitchen
We have quite a few, being in the south we have some rednecks on staff who are complete shitheads. Other day someone told the new guy to peel onions, so he sits there fucking pulling the skin off with his fingers tearing the whole thing up. That said, almost everyone in the kitchen is a moron at times.
>Genius in the kitchen
Myself, kitchen manager, head chef, sous chef are all amazing cooks. I got into baking by accident but everything I make is amazing so most people consider me and head chef to be incredible cooks, but different fields. I know a great deal of food chemistry so at times I'll say shit that sounds mind-blowing to others (i.e. explaining why almond extract smells like cherries, or why Jack Daniels tastes like bananas)

Yeah I'm a bit cocky but I've been doing this shit long enough that I know my shit.

sounds like you got your head up your ass

Yeah I really do; I should probably move on from this job but it's easy most of the time and I make my own schedule which is awesome.

Yeah I kinda do. I have a shitload of great recipes, and that's basically a baker's Gate of Babylon. Pull out the paper, do a trial run if I haven't made it in the last year, then do a full batch. Unlimited dessert works.

This week I did six different mini desserts for our buffet and made like 14 different cakes for orders. Doing some experiments with kaffir lime mousse, and that shit smells/tastes like fruity pebbles cereal.