The Chinese

Are you having a stroke?

Clams in black bean sauce

Chinese Chinese or American Chinese?

Hong Kong style sweet and sour pork

Actually I want to change it:

Singapore chow mein

Tis a meme, dear.

General Tso's shrimp is the GOAT

Almond
Boneless
Chicken

Oh god, it is the absolute best form of tendies ever....I guess it's somewhat regional to Michigan so sorry for your lots at you all

This and Singapore rice noodles

RIP Chef Peng Chang-kuei

Mongolian Beef with green onions over rice noodles is always good. There's also something special about the good ole Sesame Chicken or Orange Chicken.

Black pepper chicken.

I even try to make it at home sometimes, but it never comes out like at the restaurant.

Sushi

Weak bait-fu son

Dan dan noodles

Is it supposed to be that soupy? I've had some that wasn't that soupy.

Either:
Salt and Pepper Chips, Chicken Foo Yung and curry sauce
Or:
Chicken Szechuan with egg fried rice with salt and pepper wings

Black Pepper Chicken, the real coated shit.

I order the buffet and just serve myself 10 bowls of won-ton soup

Beef and broccoli.

I guess it depends on how much chili oil they use

Anyplace in Dongbei where you can get this and a plate of peanuts and a watery beer = comfy.

I only ever see szechuan or cantonese places in the US, but if anyone ever gets the chance to order pork and cabbage stew, I highly recommend it. The cabbage is similar to sauerkraut.

>Live in Japan for years and have access to pretty much any Chinese dish I could want, although usually less spicy than in China
>Regularly travel to China
>Every time I came back to America the first things I ate were always a turkey sandwich and American Chinese food

Its its own thing and its fucking delicious. I don't care how "unauthentic" it is

Tso's, hot and sour soup, white rice, dumplings, and a lot of chili paste

"very VERY spicy. Not american spicy, very spicy"

>they still make it not very spicy because language/culture barrier

Since when is being an unfunny retard a "meme"?

About as long as you've been here you glorious winged newfag

>Still not spicy.
You need to tell them that you want to eat it like they would eat it.
And be serious about it, they will try to discourage you if they are nice, but when they relent you will be crying like a bitch.

I have done this at places and the cook has actually come out to see me suffer as I keep eating it.
There is no language barrier of "This white fucker is crazy."

It's pretty much sauerkraut
Dongbei cuisine is overlooked most of the time but our winter foods is top tier comfy

Chink here who works as a chef at a small Chinese takeaway.

Ask me anything.

Do you use shitty jalapenos, or actually spice your food like you give a shit?

Fired rice. How.
Also the soft chicken.

Beef lo mein

Egg drop soup

How dirty is it? Would you eat the food intended for customers?

and...

Do you have a special 'real' menu for Chinese customers?

chinese ramen

sounds disgusting

sounds like nothing special

I gotta try that, damn

pleb

how do I make perfect mapo tofu at home? how do I make yuxiang sauce like in restaurants?

not him obviously

1 day old rice, super heavy iron wok, extreme amounts of heat, wait for the wok to be hot, then put in the oil, then put in the rice. only this way. don't stir, let it crust up, then stir, let it crust up.. repeat until it's crispy enough for you. deglaze with soy sauce or whatever you like. personally I use a combination of hoisin, soy sauce, fish sauce and sriracha for maximum nonauthenticity.

1. Are you here illegally.
2. If yes, then where do you live.
3. Are the owners of your restaurant tax dodgers who shift ownership every couple of years?

You don't happen to work in north san jose do you?

Dan dan literally means testicles in Mandarin.

you mean figuratively. Since gaowan is the literal term
>mapo tofu
you need pixian doubanjiang and stir fry the dried chilis at the right temperature
>yuxiang sauce
soy sauce dark vinegar and sugar. 1:1:1 ratio

t. not a chef but still a Chink

I checked it out and its not even the right character anyway. Too bad.

Well yeah there're no eggs or meatballs in that noodle typically.

OP here. I'll answer all these after work, give me two hours.

Fried rice, honey chicken or orange chicken, beef and broccoli.

Chicken fried rice with no veggies.

In Japan you can order them with or without soup

triple delight if i go to the take out place not too far away, but if i go across town to one of the buffet's i load up on sushi, and then some chicken and broccoli and spicy shrimp, and a few other things that vary, chinese american is my fucking favorite

>forgot image m8's

Bonger here, wtf is a General Tso's?

Most places here have a deep fried chicken in a chilli/honey/whatever sauce is it the same shit or am I missing out?

lo mai gui and siu mai

also good are pork spare ribs with black beans

Let me get some honey walnut shrimp
chow mein (if the noodles are thick and not ramn tier sht) and fried rice with, dare i say it, extra salt

its delicious

Lurk moar

All i want is steamed rice

I would ask for birds nest soup only if its on the menu along with items like shark fin soup otherwise its 100% steamed rice ... From what i understand chinese food should basically be devoid of oil, flour, sugar to be a real chinese meal

>no sugar
>in Chinese cuisine

This fucking guy

>From what i understand chinese food should basically be devoid of oil, flour, sugar to be a real chinese meal

>wheat noodles are not "real chinese"
>anything cooked in a wok is not "real chinese"

waterboiled beef

there's a chinese restaurant i sometimes go to with my mom and it's so fucking good, for like 20$

it's problematic because we go pretty rarely and it' so good that I don't want to try anything else in case it's not as good

B a s i l p o r k b e l l y

It's great but if you have a place willing to special order you need to ask for General Tso's Shrimp. The sweet chili sauce is so much better with the sweetness of the shrimp

Chinese noodle soups are pretty goat just tried them at one place

I'd say Mapo Tofu is my fav order but I really dig my homemade now, so most things Schezuan will do

Pressed Duck

Reminder this isnt the dead Mc'ducks thread

Try actual chinese food that you find actual chinamen at .... fuckwits upset over chopsueyshit only on Veeky Forums

Get real you cucks

Speaking of shark fin soup, has anyone had it before? I remember having it at this place called buffet king in toronto years ago and thinking it was the best soup I'd ever had.

I don't know if they actually used shark fin, but damn it was good. It's a shame they're endangered...

Honey chicken and jasmine tea

sweet and sour pork, pork lo mein, eggrolls

>could afford to
nigga how fucking poor are you to not be able to afford 8 bucks worth of fucking food?

Not that guy but I can totally dig not being able to budget eating out very often. It's not that I couldn't afford to if I wanted to, it's just a more fiscally responsible decision to cook at home every time.

Yes. Actual shark fin has no taste at all, it just adds texture to the soup. The flavors come from smoked ham and other ingredients used in the soup stock (chicken or crab usually). If you're in Hong Kong or if there's an Asian market near you, you can pick up bowls of microwavable mock sharks fin soup if you miss the taste.

Chicken Four Seasons if they have it, otherwise some variation on chicken with mixed vegetables.

Yuxiang rousi, mapo tofu, xiao long bao, baozi, guo tie, muxu rou, peking duck, yangzhou chaofan, and a mushroom pork dish with some sauce that I have no idea what it's actually called, except that it's from Northern China.

>pork and cabbage stew
What's that called in Chinese?

Oh, wait, just what you mainly order? Then it's a tie between muxu rou and the Northern Chinese mushroom pork in sauce dish.

I make my own.

I've got a carbon steel wok, and a propane burner I use to cook outside on.

My favorites are any protein with veggies and either a sweet and sour sauce, or a kung pao sauce.

Extra spicy twice cooked pork and thin noodles.

However recently I have been ordering Dim Sum platters every time I go. No rice or noodles, just a big thing of Dim Sum. It's great.

It's a meme in neither the traditional sense nor the Veeky Forums meaning. Nobody is saying that shit besides your dumb bitch ass. Also, pulling out the newfag card makes you look like one yourself. Fuck off and lurk more until you grow some brain cells.

It is literally a circa 2006 meme. Please fuck off and die in a car crash, taking your family with you. Especially your children.

Dog

Fuck yeah, same here. Haven't had that shit in years but damn it sounds good.

Fat enough to fuck your mom and suffocate her with my belly at the same time.

Potstickers, and mapo tofu -- I made these this morning.

F

What rice should I buy if I want sticky, Chinese food style boxed rice? Do I need a rice cooker to get it like the restaurant or would boil/steam in a normal pot be good enough for the same result?

>deep fried chicken in a chilli/honey/whatever sauce

Basically that, usually there's some whole Bird's Eye chilis in there with the chicken to spice it up.

Shrimp Egg Foo Yung

Also, fuckers love to mix broccoli in for no good reason

>What's that called in Chinese?
Suan cai dun pai gu (sour cabbage pork rib stew)
Looks good, what's the filling?

I ground some beef chuck up, added bok choi, asian chives, sesame oil, soy sauce, baking soda, and corn starch.

Crispy ginger beef. The thinner and crispier the better.

Does that have any relation to suan cai yu?

General Tso Chicken and vegetable lo mein

Literally just had some.

subtle

No, I don't believe so. Looks like the suan cai in that are mustard greens, not pickled cabbage.