The Cake thread

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A few years ago, 97.75 % of Veeky Forums users, would have been 10 years old.

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I bake vegan banana and chocolate cake loaves and sell them. Bitches love them.

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cheesecake factory

Looks real good

Recipe?

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Made 7 Rum cakes for Christmas gifts. I still have to make 3 more. People really like them. Rum cakes and bourbon balls are all I make at Christmas time now. Great gift

Gonna make a coconut cake for Christmas

Sounds good to me, m80.

I'm planning on making a mirror glazed chocolate cake for Christmas, but whilst I can make the glaze ezpz my crumb coating skills could use some work. Starting the work on it a day earlier than I ususally would this time around.

If anyone has access to spelt flour, you can make spelt cakes, all you do is use spelt flour instead of normal flour and add raising agent.
Spelt makes god tier lemon cake.

Is there another pan or way to make them without using a bundt pan? I don't have one.

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>mirror glazed chocolate cake
That sounds amazing, post a recipe.

You're completely right about the commentary, but otherwise, a fine collection of truly awful cakes.

It could do without the pig asses.

god, that reminds me, i still need to pick up a fruit cake. not christmas without one.

Dumping some cakes I've made

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Looks professional. Good job

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>That filename

user pls

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just use a different type of pan or a dutch oven

might lead to problems with even cooking etc. but it will result in a good cake.

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I'll probably take some pics of it whilst it's in progress tomorrow, but there's some room for variation in the recipe depending on how sweet or chocolatey you want your cake to be.

For a generally very good chocolate sponge that's moist and holds its shape well, I use the cake from scharffenberger.com/pairings-and-recipes/recipes/cakes/that-chocolate-cake/ ignoring that it's branded cocoa and blah blah exchange as you find convenient. It should go without saying, but better ingredients yield better results.

For a more chocolatey one I use the recipe at the bottom of this: theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2012/nov/21/how-to-cook-the-perfect-chocolate-cake

If you don't want your cake to look like shit, you need to buttercream it to a really smooth finish or cover it in mousse. I'd rather have something comfortable at room temperature though. I like ermine buttercream since it's not stupidly sweet, holds its shape well and it's easy to make, but you could go for swiss or french or italian, whichever you find easiest. Once it's crumb coated to within an inch of its life, stick it in the fridge and get to work on your glaze. You're gonna need a sugar thermometer for this.

For yanks:
gretchensbakery.com/mirror-glaze-recipe-vegetarian-version/
For other bongs (ingredients in the description, ignore the shirtlessness):
youtu.be/GqWtHMIOaYY?t=405

Pour it over and there you go. It gets less shiny if you fridge it, and there's a day or two shelf life on them, but when you get it right you're just gonna want to eat it immediately anyway.

Why does he have to be topless?

Mad I gave that shit a view

it's supposed to be a turkey. but yes, it does look like a turd running away from an explosion. apparently "poo wang" turkey cakes turn up in bakeries and grocery stores every thanksgiving.

I think the pig asses are a nice touch.

Thanks fampai

No fucking idea. Just used it because there's no readily available corn syrup over here and he gives a method. I suppose everyone needs an attention-whoring gimmick.

Fuck, this one gets me everytime

Jesus.

I'd still eat it

Recipe?

I've been baking a lot this month (despite not knowing how to bake) to try and get my roommates in the Christmas spirit. Banana bread, giant cookies, Rice Krispie squares, tarts. I came home the other day to see that my roommate, who rarely cooks anything beyond packaged pasta and mix, made Frosting the Snowman all by himself. It was beautiful

It's a Christmas miracle. :^)

That's actually quite impressive for a guy with no prior experience though. Good on you for inspiring it.

They just get worse and worse..

There's always Pavlova.
Speaking of mirror cakes which are en vogue right now in Russia, there's also the chocolate layer Prague Cake ("Пpaжcкий Topт"), a very famous dessert which was developed back during the Soviet Era according to GOST guidelines.
youtube.com/watch?v=wxigAqRG1LE
letthebakingbeginblog.com/2013/01/cake-prague/
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/GOST

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