Is there a soda that tastes like this?

Yerba mate soda from the ethnic isle in the grocery store

It has no calories and less caffeine than a cup of coffee.

Why exactly are you wanting to switch to soda?

>i need to stop drinking 5 a day
lol, some guy I know did that
last year he ended up in the emergency room with heart issues and the doc told him she should stop drinking so much if he wants to get older

Just cut it with doritos.

No, they wont. Shut up.

I can't find kys on Google?

Kill
Your
Self

Go eat your boogers, kid

Fuck you

sorry

I have been trying for years, there is nothing that gives the same satisfaction. I even dished them out into half portions for a while to try and cut back my consumption as if the can was open, i was finishing it.

replacing it with coffee is your best bet, but your calorie intake is still going to increase dramatically over these unless you like black.

if you can wean to coffee enough you can just have one maybe once a week for the satisfaction. At my peak i was doing 6-8 a day and i'm down to 1.

i love the taste of it and will drink a diet soda version instead

>drinking bull semen
Gross

He is.
Slowly.

This is my Favourite right now. Little too sweet but its sooooo much better then that fucking disgusting Starbucks stuff

So... you want to drink something that has less of a non-dangerous substance, caffeine, but still has all the artificial sweeteners that will give you diabetes?

retard

>
>monster isn't even carbonated

Trying to kick my addiction with seltzer, user. Kills the craving but i need that caffine kick. Thinking about getting a sodastream and caffine powder so i can make my own caffinated seltzer.
Usually drink 3 Absolute Zeros a day.

I would switch to seltzer but its just bitter compared to even plain water. Its a shame the only suitable substitute for soda is something sweetened because of the effects of carbonation

I quit drinking Monster because it gave me hives and heart murmurs. Also it would make my hands turn red and swell up. That shit is seriously unholy and most likely is shortening your lifespan

Me too, OP. Hopefully you're able to quit.

It sounds like you have an allergy bro

while i would drink 2 every night in the span of less than a half an hour when i was working night shifts, and it was literally doing nothing to me. i would fall asleep less than 1 hour later

Yes it is, dumbass.

>mfw the >first sip of the day shilling on Veeky Forums worked

ended up in the hospital because of these fucking things. I was drinking like 3 a day and now I have an enlarged heart valve at the age of 25. just waiting for the thing to start leaking and kill me. stay the fuck away from them they should seriously be illegal.

what is the grand plan?

>tfw my first sip of the day

>3 a day
There's no way you could've thought that was healthy

Fucking moron. 6/10 if bait.
I'm a healthy adult and I wouldn't dare drink more than one a day. Have more than half a brain you drooling dullard.

>all of their cycles will sync up

Make note of this, friend. It will make your life easier

I know this chick that drinks like 5 of those a day, her teeth are rotting out, she's effectively a landwhale and she suffers from multiple seizures and she's perpetually red.

I want to assume that'snot all from monster because she chainsmokes as well and her """""""fiance"""""""" also does the same and he doesn't look fucked up at all

What's the weird cap?

To protect between sips.

Ok you lead the way shit poster

I've only ever seen the doctored version of that where chin-face as exaggerated in the bottom left corner.

>5 a day
Damn how are you not dead yet?

The largest size has a cap instead of a tab.