Red-pill me on pop tarts

How do you eat them? Straight out of the package or in the toaster first?

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Toaster. Cuts out a tiny bit of the despair

>400 calories for two pastries

Knowledge ruins everything

After toasting, I break off all four edges where the filling stops and eat those first. Now the edges of the filled pocket are exposed and the unfrosted backing can be separated from the frosted side. I eat the unfrosted back once it's separated. Finally, I am left with the frosted side which I fold into itself so that it is a bit like a smaller, ragged pop tart with frosting on front and back and no plain edges. I eat this last though by the time I get to this step, it's no longer as hot as I'd like. I don't go to the trouble of further reheating because if this process got anymore involved, I would have to kill myself afterward
I try not to eat them too often

Of course toasted. Every food is better hot. S'mores flavour in particular are necessary to have fresh out the toaster

right?

When I was a fat kid I used to freeze them and eat two packages at once.

They were super good hot and super good frozen.

I always bring pop tarts camping. They make excellent fire starter. Some people prefer corn chips, but starting fires with corn chips is for plebs and faggots.

>caring about calories
Get off my board you pansy liberal.

How much do you weigh?

This

don't you fags have a Clinton Foundation event to get to?

Confirmed 300+

hurr durr I don't have an acceptable response so lol let's call him fat

I didn't call you fat, I asked you a question and you insulted me.

I assumed you were fat.

It's not hard to lose weight, I've been there. You'll feel a thousand times better than that pop tart makes you feel and when you make it you can eat pop tarts again without the shame.

This will evoke 3 responses.
1. I am a fitness god and I easily burn 5000 calories a day from a combination of being 7ft tall and shitposting
2. Lol why do you care go trump
3. Im so fat >tfw no gf

>I think I know whats best for humanity because I've been brainwashed by the weight loss lobby
Pls.

>This will evoke 3 responses.
and your gay and useless response

So let me ask you something, do you think that obesity is attractive?

The most important thing to remember is that these are neither pop nor tart.

>asking someone a subjective question
Nice bait.

Proud Trump supporter. Also fit. What's your excuse?

There's a general consensus, but I'm interested in what you think it is.

Do you think obesity is attractive to the average person?

no. do you think cock is attractive?

mine's alright, definitely better since the fat padding around my pubic area went away

Don't you?

>only mentions he's a Trump supporter when he's on the defensive

Pic related: you.

Yes, the weight loss industry runs the world. Good reasoning fatty. Whatever, Doritos and Mountain Dew taste better than pussy anyway, and finding your own dick is overrated...

trump is obese and he's going to die earlier from it

That alone would make you against obesity if you were really a trump supporter

Am I suppose to start every post by announcing I'm a proud Trump supporter?

>on the food board
>hate the free market that brings you delicious food
communists are not welcome on this website.

Seriously I know you're not happy on the inside, you're just eating your abuse or feelings.

We simply have different definitions of delicious. I think food is delicious. You think sugar is delicious. I like to eat things that taste like food. You like to eat things that taste like sugar. I can control how much I eat. You have a physical and mental addiction to sugar. I live a healthy and active lifestyle. You are lethargic and out of shape because you sit around all day everyday eating sugar. It's pretty simple really...

>general consensus on an objective idea
Whoop. What a fag you are.

nice accusation dodge, faggot.

>trump is obese
Do you have eyes that aren't defective pieces of shit?

>I think you're eating too much
>YOU DISAGREE WITH MY POLITICS
Do you see the disconnect?

Yes, there is a general consensus. It's LITERALLY what fat people are trying to destroy, the "concept of beauty" is slim.

Trump is medically obese. You are in denial.

You're the one who provides absolutely no argument, just more accusations.

>not fat? Hilary supporter
>Trump supporter? Not real Trump supporter
>not fat? Brainwashed by weight loss lobby
>shows proof sugar lobby is responsible for brainwashing? Communist against free market
>not fat fuck sugar addict like me? Avoided my accusations

You're just a sad fat fuck who is probably a virgin, or possibly paid a hooker to have sex with you, and the look of disgust on her face while she fucked you is why you can never hire another one. Your life is sad, but I don't feel bad for you. You ate your way to this point. I hate fat fucks like you. Stupid, uneducated, and everything bad in your life is someone else's fault. I would tell you to kill yourself, but I prefer you continue to suffer in your miserable existence for the short amount of time you have left.

I hope you live a long and fulfilling life.

for me

Out of the package, but toasted once in a while.

toaster and with milk

I've never toasted a Pop-Tart in my life. S'mores is the best flavor, with cherry a close second.

>God tier
Lightly toasted (with milk/coffee)
>Good tier
Frozen
>Shit tier
Fully toasted/burned
>I'm fucking wasted just give me the food
Right out of the package

Fatties are not welcome on Veeky Forums please fuck off

>straight out of the package

You need to toast it and butter it up. Trust me, once you butter up your pop-tart you never go back.

DUDE FAMILY GUY IS SO FUNNY XDDD

ok honestly what the fuck is wrong with a person who does this

Just gonna go ahead and post the best toaster pastry of all time.

I eat them in the true patrician way, heating them in the microwave.

I've never had anything but fruit toaster strudels in my area. I would fucking love a boston cream pie one, are there any other non-fruit ones?

Are you one of those shitheels that responds to obvious shitposting seriously because you find it amusing, or because it strengthens your position, or whatever; or are you just a literal retard that has no ability to tell when somebody is taking the piss?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toaster_Strudel
Seems to be a few. Snickerdoodle and pumpkin seem interesting. S'mores seems like it would be gross.

I feel like I'm the only one who actually enjoys the bacon, egg, and cheese variety. They're not half bad, really.

They're good, though I'll take the breakfast Hot Pockets over them. Cheaper.

Mostly boredom...

Who /freeze/ here?

I like the Dunkin Donuts ones.

my nikka

>you have a physical and mental addiction to sugar

It's actually fat for me, I go through heavy cream like it's water and fresh cheese like it's potatoes.

To be fair I wouldn't be surprised if some of these retarded meme diets like "you can eat as many calories of food as you want as long as you just avoid carbohydrates/fat/sugar/(insert scapegoat of the month here)" and that ilk weren't funded in part by food companies.

Healthy young OP starts a thread, off topic shit posters start bickering about politics - AUTISM. Many such cases!

Sous vide pop tarts are the shit.

You could be skinny if you did keto, and you don't have to give up the qt of heavy cream and lb of bacon for breakfast

Keto was the best thing I've ever done for my health. I second this.

>good source of 6 vitamins and minerals

do you eat vegetables?

What are some other snacks/candy that's good frozen?

I know one of you guys like frozen Charleston Chews.

You can.

I've gone weeks without them and I've also had them for every meal spanning 3 days, you really only need to count your carbs. Calories are important too, but honestly I've never had to even think about them because the food you can eat on keto is both filling and time consuming to prepare so I rarely get above 1600. I'm down to 197 from 300 since Jan 2016

I stay under 30g of carbs per day, I've heard of others staying under 50, or subtracting the fiber content from the total carbs, but I don't bother with that, I just use the face value on the nutrition info for carbs.

The one thing about keto is if you can't consistently stay on the diet you'll never see any results. It takes me about 4 days to a week for my body to enter ketosis, you can buy test strips. If you're taking a cheat day every week or unable to stay under your carb limit, the diet won't work. If you're taking a cheat weekend every month you'll shed pounds like nothing.

yep, my mom taught me to do that.

Mix banana, peanut butter, and a chocolate pop in a blender. Add protein powder or supplements if that's your thing. Pop it in the freezer and wait until it is ice cream consistency. Wa-la

Chocolate pop, is that like a fudgesicle?

yes. I enjoy healthy choice bars just as much though. Be sure to experiment with the ratios, but I enjoy 2 tbsp creamy peanut butter with half a ripe banana and one fudge bar.

I usually do both, i'm glad they brought back wild berry. I do miss the one where the sprinkles turn into different colors ;_;. I think that flavor was white raspberry?

You know that's not healthy, right?

PB has like a million calories per tsp, there's no point in saving on the chocolate bar.

Sounds good, I'll give it a try.

Peanut butter has 190 calories per 2 TBSP. Add 90 for the bar and 100 for the banana and you're under 400. Factor in the protein powder and you've got a meal. Also user might just prefer the Healthy Choice for flavor and not necessarily for the perceived healthiness.

>under 400
>for a drink
I challenge you to show me one person who drinks a meal and doesn't regret it or eat another solid meal.

Like the other user said, it has nothing to do with healthfulness. I was just raised on them is all, and they taste just as good as all-sugar fudge pops.

>for a drink
How often do you drink things that are ice cream consistency?

If this user doesn't treat it as a meal then it's a snack. If he's counting calories and doesn't go over his daily allowance then there's no issue.

As for drinks, the protein / diet shake industry is constantly putting out new products. There are entire sections of the grocery store dedicated to them. While I myself wouldn't be satisfied with a drink as a meal, plenty must be.

Depends on the flavor of course. I also put some flavors in the refrigerator.

when will grape pop tarts come back... does god even love us anymore....

I might be biased because eating breakfast at 6:00 when I was in high school was fucking nauseating, but god all the extra pastry on these things was gross

The cream cheese and strawberry flavor was ultra top tier, my mom would buy boston cream pie if the good ones weren't in stock because I liked the frosting

I haven't had either a strudel or a tart in years, they're a waste of calories

I've never actually put a poptart in the toaster. It always seemed disgusting. I also think baked fruits taste like metal though so maybe i'm just retarded.

Cookies n creme pop tarts are pretty good if you can't find classic brown sugar cinnamon.

the government probably forces them to put them in, like they do with breakfast cereal

you know cornflakes are magnetic?

Yeah this was pretty much my breakfast before school in middle school and highschool.

Can't eat them anymore, along with those Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwiches. So greasy.

I recently tried the S'mores flavor and was rather surprised. Just needs more of that graham cracker flavoring.